398: Nothing At All...

[andyleggett]

Friday I fell sick again, this time with much hacking--and, sorrow or ironies, that was the night we had Karoke in the lounge. I had been so excited, and now my throat was shot to hell. I still championed through, with slightly less than disastrous consequences--but my throat hurt like hell on Saturday, though I'm somewhat better now...

Among other

Comments

[chibibluebird]

To be honest, I found it overwrought and lacking in specific detail.

[andyleggett]

Hee.

Well, I was trying to make it less so and more so on both counts, but there's only so much you can do with this. She kills herself. That's about it. I suppose the point is it is lacking in detail and depending on how you look at it, she's just being melodramatic... but isn't that the case with any suicide? What I like about it is the fact that she doesn't simply get on the chair and let gravity do it's work, but literally lifs herself up by the rope; going from passivity to agency. Is that not clear?

[chibibluebird]

Though removing the last line would help a tiny bit.

[chibibluebird]

Aw, I like th last line! Isn't it like, she finally escapes the torment of men--or is that made clear by the fact that they're driven out of her mind before...? Hm. I guess I could do away with it...

[andyleggett]

Sorry, that was me...

Actually, taking out that last line could bring me to a perfect 200, so consider it scratched...