I went to Trader Joe's for my groceries for the first time in, like, 2 years. I felt like I was becoming part of a utopian hippie society until a customer accidentally dropped a jar of salad dressing and the entire store gasped aloud except for me, who snorted to myself. Then, I bought Champagne Pear Vinaigrette with Gorgonzola. I highly recommend ( Read more... )

I'm officially out of my first LA apartment and mostly moved into my second one, although technically it's in Studio City in the Valley. Many thanks to all who helped me move, namely Sarah, Sarah's dad, Sarah's friend, and Emily. And thanks to those who gave moral support as well. I still have stuff in my car that I was way too tired to transport ( Read more... )

I'm going home on July 4th weekend, and I can't wait. I just realized my house is on Google Street View. No one was home when they took the picture, unless my brother was home without a car and both my parents were out ( Read more... )

"I've begun worshiping the Sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the Sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, reflections at the park... the occasional skin cancer, but hey. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don ( Read more... )

I'm house/cat sitting for my cousin this week, and I brought my cat with me ( Read more... )

1. The two former Daily Show writers we have on staff.
2. We tape on the original I Love Lucy stage ( Read more... )

I just talked to my brother on the phone about what we're getting our dad for Fathers' Day:

Me: Yeah, I just ordered my present online. It's pretty good. Yeah, you're gonna have to contend with this one. Bring your A-game.
Neil: Yeah, well, you're going to have to contend with my present being on time! Oh!

As Jess would say, burn.

Today, on set, I went to the bathroom in the location's poolhouse bathroom. I thought I heard knocking on the door while I was in there, so I kept saying, "One second!" and "I'll be out soon!" When I opened the door, no one was waiting for me, but there were plenty of people in the poolhouse sitting around...who probably heard me. So. Awkward ( Read more... )

V.O.: The following takes place between 12:00 pm and 1:00 pm.

(Amy decides to fully clean the kitchen floor for the first time in months. She sweeps the floor with a broom, then she Swiffers with Swiffer wet wipes. To dry the floor completely, she Swiffers with Swiffer dry wipes. Then, she cleans the area around her cat's food dish with Fantastik ( Read more... )

File this under "I'm not surprised because I've been to Japan."