Isn't it lovely to live in a sexist culture where women aren't considered real humans?
I've been meaning to post a link to this for a while now. cereta made a post that has spawned lots of thought and discussion that I think is important.
( Cut for possibly triggering stuff in the excerpts and comments, for those of you who are interested; links below if you'd rather just that )
( Cut for possibly triggering stuff in the excerpts and comments, for those of you who are interested; links below if you'd rather just that )
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1) Talking about rape. I have been in therapy for a year, nearly a decade after the fact, and still say "that thing that happened." I am able to forgive him and find excuses for his behavior. I still struggle with granting myself that same courtesy.
2. Talking about abortion. And here's why: I'm actually kind of pro-life. This came about for three reasons: the low self esteem that gave me the idea that my life actually has no worth aside from being able to bear children, my beliefs in nonviolence of any kind, and also that, as a teenager, my father told me he would force me to have an abortion if I got pregnant (so in my head, having an abortion = doing something to my body that I don't want to do because someone else wants me to, which is totally backwards ( ... )
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Oh, honey, the way that our experiences have fucked up our thinking!
You are NOT part of the problem. You are thinking and considering and re-considering. You are calling "that thing that happened to you" by the name you CAN while still being functional. You are LIVING, and that is what matters. If you can't, this week or next year, say, "I was raped," then, well, we can still figure out that "that thing that happened" to you was rape and we can count our lucky stars that you're around to be our friend and wonder WTF was up in the ashram that they didn't GET THIS and DO SOMETHING sooner--NOT, btw that YOU didn't "do something" sooner: it was the job of the adults...and, particularly, the rapist NOT to rape you--so that you would have an easier go of it now.
And, with your dad's edict, and your experiences re: brood mare and threatened and actual forced action toward YOUR BODY...I think your hesitancy and position makes perfect sense. Also, as I said to someone in another journal in another thread, the fact that you ( ... )
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*applauds*
You can be pro-choice AND pro-life.
THIS. I really hate that the anti-choice people stole that phrase. Its an excellent example of the power of words.
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And *hugs* you. You don't have to be anon, sweetie, but I understand why you'd choose that and am okay with it.
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