Comments | amieroserotruck: Ah well

amieroserotruck

Ah well

Apr 23, 2007 17:00

So I didn't make it to round two of the fangs_fur_fey hook contest (I was #131 if anyone's keeping track). I did get some very good feedback, including a comment that's come up before: worldbuilding. I really need to develop the world so it shines through in both a hook and the manuscript itself. Alas, between BDC and my thesis and coming up with some new ( Read more... )

stone chain, writing

Comments 10

amanda_marrone April 23 2007, 22:04:45 UTC

I didn't have your hook--(I didn't have anything in the hundreds)but now that I have time, I'll have to go check out the other hooks.

anastasia1901 April 23 2007, 22:34:46 UTC

Hm... mine is not yet posted. I will look yours up, though!

anastasia1901 April 23 2007, 22:58:41 UTC

And I have looked up yours! I think it sounds interesting, and I totally understand about the world-building thing, I've gotten that comment a number of times. But yeah, if you don't have the time for it right now, wait until you can really dig into it and make it great.

Also, "Rites of the Healer" by Anne Gray is all about a girl questioning what she was taught about her world when she has to go out and save it - I got this in a review packet, and it was a decent read, though not great.

amieroserotruck April 24 2007, 02:26:56 UTC

Thanks for checking it out! I'll have to check out that book; it sounds like it has the one twist that I thought made mine stand out from typical fantasy. Oh well.

anastasia1901 April 24 2007, 02:46:43 UTC

Well, yours sounds a bit, erm... better... than that one. "Rites" is more about questioning her prejudices that were based on what she was taught as a child. But her parents don't really believe what she does, so I'm not really sure how she got these ideas or how they stuck when her parents didn't believe them. So it is a bit different.

Thread 5

akashiver April 24 2007, 00:20:42 UTC

I thought a "hook" was the opening line of the story, as opposed to a precis, synopsis or pitch... Anyway, I think it's an interesting idea.

amieroserotruck April 24 2007, 02:40:39 UTC

I've heard all sorts of words used to mean pitch/synopsis. I'm trying to remember if I've heard hook used like the contest defined it before and honestly can't remember.

And thanks! :)

alanajoli April 24 2007, 03:02:43 UTC

The comments you got seemed really helpful, and I hope you don't mind if I add a little further feedback (non-professional, of course). From your hook it looked like there were several ideas that made it really different (the stolen shape/memory, questioning her mission, and the mission itself). *All* of them sound interesting to me, but it'll help to really make one of them the focus of the hook.

(Honestly, it was that first line that caught me the most. Who was she before she was chosen for the prophecy?)

The most interesting novel I've read with the MC questioning her mission (and eventually completely revising her world view) is Illumination by Terry McGarry. It was her first novel, and the narrative structure could have used work (in my opinion as a reader). Also, it's an adult novel, so outside your market anyway. (I tend to not want to read things that are a lot like what I'm writing when I'm writing--so if you're like me, actually avoid this novel until you're working on another project. *g ( ... )

amieroserotruck April 24 2007, 15:06:47 UTC

Thanks for the feedback! I'm also getting some good recommendations of books similar to mine, but so far nothing EXACTLY like mine, which is good. I think I will try re-writing that with making the questioning of the mission (which is the main personal plot point, although she is PLENTY angry about having her memories stolen). Thanks!!