A triple-decker movie review: Pandorum, Zombieland, and Blindness
Saw three movies within the past week that I thought were worth mini-reviews. They will be mini because, while they inspired reviews, they didn't inspire BIG reviews. Also, I'm sick and don't think I could do mega-reviews. All of these movies have a common theme, at least in my reaction, and that theme is expectations.
As the power went out Thursday night, seemed like a good idea to head to the movies. As Zombieland wasn't out yet, we decided to see Pandorum. That movie was slightly better than I expected it would be, not spectacular. Two spaceship pilots (Bower, played by Ben Foster, and Payton, played by Dennis Quaid) awake from deep sleep on board a spacecraft with few memories beyond technical operation of the craft. Trapped in a chamber, Payton remains behind to help guide Bower through the ship. Bower worms his way through the inner bowels of the craft to find that the craft has been taken over by monsters that bear a striking resemblance to those from "The Descent" (if you just add clothes and weapons). Bower meets a few survivors on the ship and tries to find his way to the core, which he needs to fix before the craft goes into complete shutdown. As the movie progresses, Bower and Payton regain their memories slowly, realizing that they are on a ship designed to colonize another Earth-like planet. While entirely predictable, there were a few scares (and I tend not to scare easily at science fiction movies) and some halfway-decent psychological drama. The bad movie physics was especially entertaining, as always (but still not quite as bad as "Sunshine.") As one of my friends from Hollins would say, "Good cheesy fun."
Saturday we saw the movie I'd been waiting for, "Zombieland." The previews made it look like an American "Shaun of the Dead." This is one movie where my expectations were met exactly. Not off by one hair, but dead on what I expected from the previews. A guy (no real names are ever given) played by Jesse Eisenberg ("The Village," "Cursed") in a very amusing performance has managed to stay alive in a world overrun by zombies largely because of his phobias and his rules. The rules, amusingly, appear from time to time in type over the scene that illustrations them ("Wear seat belts," "Beware of Bathrooms," "Double tap"). He meets up with Woody Harrelson's character (brilliantly portrayed; I've always wished Harrelson got more roles. Saw him on stage in London with Kyle MacLaughlin in "An Average Day" and they both were amazing) and they decide to travel together. Referring to each other by where they want to go (Eisenberg is Columbus, Harrelson is Tallahassee), they begin road-tripping across the US. They meet up with two sisters (Emma Stone and the adorable Abigail Breslin) who give new meaning to the phrase "Trust no one." The girls want to go to an amusement park because it has no zombies. Why they heard that I have no idea and, of course, there are zombies aplenty once they get there. They also meet up with a Hollywood icon played by himself (won't say who and please don't go to IMDB to check out the cast, the surprise is SO worth it!). Much mayhem and gore and good cheesy zombie fun ensues!
This truly is the American "Shaun of the Dead." While Shaun still reigns supreme in my heart, this movie really captured the classic American road trip with classic American zombie fun.
Then came Sunday. Neither of us was feeling well, so we Netflixed it. The only thing that grabbed my attention was "Blindness," which I thought looked very good. How very, very wrong I was.
Now, before I get bombarded with people saying "But the book was great!" (believe me, I heard that a lot when I updated my Facebook status with how horrible the movie was), let me remind you I'm judging it as a movie. Maybe the book is great, I don't know. But the movie was probably the worst I've ever seen, barring "Solaris" (we didn't even make it through that one, that's the only movies I've rented and then didn't finish watching). This also has to do with expectations. I watch a lot of very bad movies and enjoy them because I know they can't be taken seriously. But when I see a movie so obviously done as "high" art and it fails, then I get really annoyed. I do enjoy movies like this (LOVED "Children of Man") and I'm not one to condemn a movie because it has disturbing scenes (which this really, REALLY does, consider yourself warned). My main issues were believability, characters, and the way some scenes were shot.
A man suddenly goes blind while driving his car. He is, from what we see in the movie, patient zero for a plague of blindness. He goes to an eye doctor (Mark Ruffalo) who eventually becomes blind as well. The doctor's wife (played by Juliane Moore) is the only person who retains her sight among the main characters. The government, oddly, rounds up the first people who become bind. This was annoyance number one. If these were the first few people affected, why weren't they studied? I couldn't pinpoint what country this was supposed to be, and that's ok, but I really can't see ANY country that isn't 3rd world rounding up the first few people to get such an odd disease and not study or monitor them at all and just cram them into a building to fend for themselves. What purpose does it serve? Later on in the plague when things are total chaos, sure. First few people? Not buying it. It is possible that they weren't the first few people, but why wasn't an eye doctor aware this was going on, then? They would be the first average citizens to notice something weird was happening.
As time goes on and more people are crammed into quarantine, things begin to fall apart. A dictator who somehow (never explained how) got a hold of a gun begins intercepting the food and demands payment for it. Again, to be expected after a point. However, this is where I really lost it on Juliane Moore's character. SHE CAN SEE! She could do all sorts of things, like trying to get the gun, finding out more about the food and intercepting. Instead, she is one of the most milk-sop characters I think I've ever seen in a post-apocalyptic movie. And don't even get me started on how, when she sees her husband with another woman, she instantly forgives them because "I can see!" UGH! I was pretty ticked off at the helplessness of all the characters in general, actually. I'm not saying that all characters have to be gung-ho or likable, but you have to least WANT to be interested in what happens to them. I didn't care enough about any of these characters to have any feeling other than frustration at all of them.
And seriously? A guy goes blind and needs his wife to actually feed him and wipe his butt? Have none of these people ever had a blackout?
Then there were some shots that were very confusing. A few started from the POV of a blind character, so everything was white. But then the shot would change gradually from white to normal. Not a cut shot, but a gradual shot. This made the viewer wonder if the character's sight was coming back.
I think the most frustrating thing, other than the annoying characters, was this was one instance of a good movie trapped in a bad movie. A few plot changes and make the characters likeable, it might have been decent. Instead, I'm ticked off and am not sure if I should read the book to vindicate it or if the movie completely ruined the book for me.
As the power went out Thursday night, seemed like a good idea to head to the movies. As Zombieland wasn't out yet, we decided to see Pandorum. That movie was slightly better than I expected it would be, not spectacular. Two spaceship pilots (Bower, played by Ben Foster, and Payton, played by Dennis Quaid) awake from deep sleep on board a spacecraft with few memories beyond technical operation of the craft. Trapped in a chamber, Payton remains behind to help guide Bower through the ship. Bower worms his way through the inner bowels of the craft to find that the craft has been taken over by monsters that bear a striking resemblance to those from "The Descent" (if you just add clothes and weapons). Bower meets a few survivors on the ship and tries to find his way to the core, which he needs to fix before the craft goes into complete shutdown. As the movie progresses, Bower and Payton regain their memories slowly, realizing that they are on a ship designed to colonize another Earth-like planet. While entirely predictable, there were a few scares (and I tend not to scare easily at science fiction movies) and some halfway-decent psychological drama. The bad movie physics was especially entertaining, as always (but still not quite as bad as "Sunshine.") As one of my friends from Hollins would say, "Good cheesy fun."
Saturday we saw the movie I'd been waiting for, "Zombieland." The previews made it look like an American "Shaun of the Dead." This is one movie where my expectations were met exactly. Not off by one hair, but dead on what I expected from the previews. A guy (no real names are ever given) played by Jesse Eisenberg ("The Village," "Cursed") in a very amusing performance has managed to stay alive in a world overrun by zombies largely because of his phobias and his rules. The rules, amusingly, appear from time to time in type over the scene that illustrations them ("Wear seat belts," "Beware of Bathrooms," "Double tap"). He meets up with Woody Harrelson's character (brilliantly portrayed; I've always wished Harrelson got more roles. Saw him on stage in London with Kyle MacLaughlin in "An Average Day" and they both were amazing) and they decide to travel together. Referring to each other by where they want to go (Eisenberg is Columbus, Harrelson is Tallahassee), they begin road-tripping across the US. They meet up with two sisters (Emma Stone and the adorable Abigail Breslin) who give new meaning to the phrase "Trust no one." The girls want to go to an amusement park because it has no zombies. Why they heard that I have no idea and, of course, there are zombies aplenty once they get there. They also meet up with a Hollywood icon played by himself (won't say who and please don't go to IMDB to check out the cast, the surprise is SO worth it!). Much mayhem and gore and good cheesy zombie fun ensues!
This truly is the American "Shaun of the Dead." While Shaun still reigns supreme in my heart, this movie really captured the classic American road trip with classic American zombie fun.
Then came Sunday. Neither of us was feeling well, so we Netflixed it. The only thing that grabbed my attention was "Blindness," which I thought looked very good. How very, very wrong I was.
Now, before I get bombarded with people saying "But the book was great!" (believe me, I heard that a lot when I updated my Facebook status with how horrible the movie was), let me remind you I'm judging it as a movie. Maybe the book is great, I don't know. But the movie was probably the worst I've ever seen, barring "Solaris" (we didn't even make it through that one, that's the only movies I've rented and then didn't finish watching). This also has to do with expectations. I watch a lot of very bad movies and enjoy them because I know they can't be taken seriously. But when I see a movie so obviously done as "high" art and it fails, then I get really annoyed. I do enjoy movies like this (LOVED "Children of Man") and I'm not one to condemn a movie because it has disturbing scenes (which this really, REALLY does, consider yourself warned). My main issues were believability, characters, and the way some scenes were shot.
A man suddenly goes blind while driving his car. He is, from what we see in the movie, patient zero for a plague of blindness. He goes to an eye doctor (Mark Ruffalo) who eventually becomes blind as well. The doctor's wife (played by Juliane Moore) is the only person who retains her sight among the main characters. The government, oddly, rounds up the first people who become bind. This was annoyance number one. If these were the first few people affected, why weren't they studied? I couldn't pinpoint what country this was supposed to be, and that's ok, but I really can't see ANY country that isn't 3rd world rounding up the first few people to get such an odd disease and not study or monitor them at all and just cram them into a building to fend for themselves. What purpose does it serve? Later on in the plague when things are total chaos, sure. First few people? Not buying it. It is possible that they weren't the first few people, but why wasn't an eye doctor aware this was going on, then? They would be the first average citizens to notice something weird was happening.
As time goes on and more people are crammed into quarantine, things begin to fall apart. A dictator who somehow (never explained how) got a hold of a gun begins intercepting the food and demands payment for it. Again, to be expected after a point. However, this is where I really lost it on Juliane Moore's character. SHE CAN SEE! She could do all sorts of things, like trying to get the gun, finding out more about the food and intercepting. Instead, she is one of the most milk-sop characters I think I've ever seen in a post-apocalyptic movie. And don't even get me started on how, when she sees her husband with another woman, she instantly forgives them because "I can see!" UGH! I was pretty ticked off at the helplessness of all the characters in general, actually. I'm not saying that all characters have to be gung-ho or likable, but you have to least WANT to be interested in what happens to them. I didn't care enough about any of these characters to have any feeling other than frustration at all of them.
And seriously? A guy goes blind and needs his wife to actually feed him and wipe his butt? Have none of these people ever had a blackout?
Then there were some shots that were very confusing. A few started from the POV of a blind character, so everything was white. But then the shot would change gradually from white to normal. Not a cut shot, but a gradual shot. This made the viewer wonder if the character's sight was coming back.
I think the most frustrating thing, other than the annoying characters, was this was one instance of a good movie trapped in a bad movie. A few plot changes and make the characters likeable, it might have been decent. Instead, I'm ticked off and am not sure if I should read the book to vindicate it or if the movie completely ruined the book for me.