Hump Day Crush -- An Intro

[american_arcane]

For those of you who've been here for a year or so, some of this may seem familiar. For those of you newer to my corner of the web, this may be new.

For a long time now, I've been interested in relationships, crushes and all those other things that make us do silly things for totally illogical reasons. This is mostly because for a long time I was

Comments

[nofcna]

next week? what about tomorrow? It's only Thursday ;-)

your statement about "romantic love" reminds me of my entry a couple of years back: http://nofcna.livejournal.com/33659.html

I agree with you. . .

[american_arcane]

hehe... next week for the next article. Always jumping in with both feet. (Especially when it comes to the whole crush thing... so many people to crush on, so little time to do it!) ;)

I remember that entry. Good stuff... good stuff, indeed.

[kittenofwrath]

I definitely agree that people would be happier if they became more comfortable being single, in general, and more comfortable with themselves

[american_arcane]

Romantic love can be a wonderful thing. But it has to be built on a firm foundation. Without that solid foundation--a foundation of self-respect and honesty--it is a hollow and fleeting respite from a harsh reality. A reality that will still be there when the romance has turned to resentment and the high-minded gestures to empty ritual.

I am a hopeless romantic. But I try to take it for what it is--fantasy. Sure, any real, good non-platonic relationship can have a good bunch of romance in it, but the romance isn't what makes the relationship work. The romance is what adds an extra kick to something that's already amazing all by itself.

Friendship is that unconditional, platonic Love that, as far as I'm concerned, is at the root of every great relationship. Without that, our own growth is seriously hindered.

We are, after all, social creatures. No man is an island. If removed from our friends, our relations, our compatriots, we become something less. Like a plant removed from the life-giving soil

[kittenofwrath]

Wow, very well said!

I completely agree--my best relationship has been founded on a solid basis of friendship first. Every time I have jumped into something without being friends with the person first, it has failed miserably, when we both realized there was really no foundation to build the relationship on.

I think I've just always been in love with the idea of romantic love. When I was little (like, 6-7 years old) I'd constantly dream about being a bride someday, even though I don't recall anyone around me even talking about marriage or relationships while I was growing up. I'd pick wildflowers and put them in a bouquet and pretend I was throwing it to the bridesmaids. ;) Hee.

[magic_lilybean]

Hmmm... I'd have to disagree. Sure, I've had relationships that started with friendship, but the single best relationship I've had began purely romantically and is still the longest-lasting and happiest one of all of them. It doesn't need to begin in friendship for it to have a solid foundation of friendship. My husband's my best friend - but he wasn't when we started dating. Or even schtupping.

The truth is, there are a variety of viable ways in which a strong relationship can form. I do think friendship is an important component of a good relationship, but it doesn't always start out that way.