Fic: One Armed Bandit Strikes Again (19/?)
Kris, Danny and Allison had made it to the final three. He still hadn’t spoken to Adam and wondered if Adam was even following the show anymore. Adam was still showing up in the UK tabloids and they were even hinting at him being seen with the same blonde guy more than once. Kris knew most of what they printed wasn’t accurate but it still bothered him. He chose to sing Heartless and Kiss a girl. The night of the performance he broke down and tried to call Adam but it just went into voicemail. Kris didn’t leave a message even though he knew Adam’s phone would show he called.
The pressure was on the night of the performance. His father came backstage to give him a pep talk, “Son, I am so proud of you. For the last few years you have been pretty unimpressive and I thought you would never become anything. Well, here you are being fairly successful. So I just hope you don’t sabotage yourself like you usually do and instead, do good. I think now that you have gotten over your…little problem, God may be on your side.”
Some cheerleader! Kris looked at his father, “My little problem?”
Neil Allen looked really uncomfortable, “Son, let’s not discuss the terrible sins you committed. The important thing is you have turned back into the light and now you are with a beautiful girl and appearing on national TV. Good job.”
Kris could not bring himself to see Adam as a terrible sin. Sure, a source of frustration, a perpetual diva, even an open wound but not a terrible sin. Kris looked at his father, “For the record, I am only on national TV because of Adam. If I hadn’t met him, I would never have had the courage to pursue my dream.”
Neil shifted, “Son he took advantage of your weakness. You had just been jilted and he led you down a dark road. I know you aren’t really unnatural so let’s not ever mention your transgressions. I am sure Katy doesn’t want to know you were friends with someone like that.”
Kris just shook his head, “Friends? We were lovers, Dad. If being with him was a sin, I committed a lot of them and God help me, I would do it again in a heartbeat.”
Neil smacked him, “Watch your mouth. Son, you had better seek help before you ruin everything. Why do you always try and disappoint your mother and me? You could have the whole world at your feet with a good woman on your side and instead, you talk of being with an abomination. Son, I am going to pray for your soul and hope you do the right thing.”
Neil walked out and Kris felt shaky. Katy came over a few minutes later, “Hi, are you ready for your big night?”
“I guess. I just had a big blowout with my father.”
“Well, he can be a little small minded so I am not surprised. Well, whatever it was about, forget it. You don’t need their approval and you certainly don’t owe your success to them.”
“Thanks, you are a good person and it means a lot that you are here supporting me.”
“Always. And when you become a big star, you better let me act in your videos so I can get some exposure.”
“Deal.” Kris hugged her and kissed her softly on the lips. Before Kris knew it, he kissed her longer. Katy responded for a few seconds and then pulled back, “Kris, as much as I want to kiss you and be with you, I think we should wait until the dust settles and you sort yourself out. Let’s not rush into anything.”
Kris felt embarrassed, “I am sorry, Katy.”
“I’m not. I just think we should wait. Now, go kick Danny’s ass.”
Kris smiled as he watched her go back to the audience seats. Kris thought about the kiss and how nice it was. It was tender and sweet. It was very different than the all consuming kisses he shared with Adam. When Adam kissed him, he couldn’t even think. Adam was much more aggressive and made his knees buckle. It was as if nothing existed outside of the kiss. No, it was better to have control and moderation. Kris once again thought in the long run Katy’s temperament might suit him more. Yet, the thought of kissing Adam stirred his loins and made his heart ache. How could Adam just not call and apparently move on? Kris went on stage with just his guitar
In the night I hear 'em talk,
The coldest story ever told,
Somewhere far along this road
He lost his soul,
To SOMEONE so heartless
How could you be so heartless?
Oh, how could you be so heartless?...
Kris finished the song and got nothing put love form the judges. Allison and Danny both did good. Kris really hoped he and Allison made it to the finals but he was happy that people were finally talking about his singing rather than his sexuality or pictures. His more family friendly image was winning over the younger crowd. Kris sang, “Wanna kiss the Girl” by Keith Urban and kept it gender specific since it was for Katy. Ryan came over after the song and asked if there was a special someone that was for?”
Kris blushed, “Kind of but like I said I am taking a break from relationships. Who knows maybe when the dust settles, I’ll get my kiss.”
The judges weren’t as impressed with that performance and Simon called him clumsy. Kris hoped it didn’t cost him the competition. That night they all went to celebrate the performance. Kris still was still angry at his father but for everyone sake he was civil. Kris watched Katy and his mother chatting about makeup like best friends. Kris smiled when he thought what it would be like if Adam met his parents. Although his mother would be appalled, Adam could probably talk about makeup more than Katy. Once again he felt a pang. His phone rang and Kris excused himself to answer it, “Hey Adam, how are you?”
“Having the time of my life, babe. Hey thanks for the song, it was really sweet that I got “heartless” while the blonde bimbo got, “I wanna kiss the girl”.”
Here we go. Kris hoped to avoid a fight, “Maybe it was about Julie.”
“Really, than you would have kept the word ‘woman’ let’s not pretend I am stupid. Anyway, whatever, despite the sentiment, it was a good version of Kanye’s hit. The judges were right about the other tune. Aside from it being a shitty song you looked like an awkward high school hick trying to get laid at the prom. I hope she puts out before you get booted off the show.”
Kris could not believe after weeks of not talking, Adam just laid into him like that, “Fuck you. If you called just to be an asshole, mission accomplished you can hang up now.”
“Actually, I didn’t intend be so bitchy. I just can’t believe how quickly you transfer affections for people. Well, the media loves your new family friendly gig. Are you going to start denying we ever had anything?” Kris could tell Adam’s words were slurring a bit.
“Are you drunk?”
“No, I only had a few shots and a couple tokes. Why are you gonna criticize me for that too? I am sure Ms. Apple pie doesn’t ever indulge.”
“Why do you hate Katy so much? She is a great person and a friend of mine.”
Adam’s tone softened, “I hate her because she is the reason you don’t miss me. Why don’t you miss me?”
Kris sighed, “I do. I miss you all the time but you refuse to change and I can’t keep compromising my principles even for you.”
“Are you going dating her?”
Kris wanted to be honest, “No but I am thinking about it. Can you give me a good reason not to?”
Adam was quiet and then said softly, “No, I guess not.”
Prick! Kris was glad he had held his ground since it was obvious Adam was still not willing to give in, “OK, well anything else?”
“Good luck and whatever happens on the show, you already showed the world just how good you are. Plus, you still get to go on tour even if you lose. Enjoy the spotlight, you never know when it will fade.”
Kris hung up and had no clue why Adam bothered to call or act jealous. It was his fault they were apart. Kris went to results night and was ecstatic when it was announced he and Allison would be in the finals. The next week was fast and furious getting ready for the finale and having to perform three songs. He would be performing, “Ain’t no Sunshine”, “
“What’s going on?” and “No boundaries”. Kris had dinner with Katy the day before the final two performance show and told her about his song choice. He was worried she would be upset, “I am thinking of doing ‘Ain’t no sunshine’ but I will change the pronoun to she.”
Katy smiled, “Kris, when you sang that song it was beautiful because you really meant it. Everyone could see the pain and regret in your eyes. That song is about Adam not me. If you don’t feel that way now, don’t do the song.”
“It’s over between me and him. I need to move on and I don’t want to ruin things between us. I don’t want to remind the world that Adam and I…were together. It is not fair to you.””
“Kris, don’t you dare start using me as your emotional crutch. Look, I care about you and I do hope we can be together someday. However, I don’t want to pretend you are something other than you. I am not your parents and I accept you had a relationship with Adam. I also know you still have feelings for him. Like I said, if you mean it than sing it. If not do another song.”
Kris looked at Katy, “Well, I can still change the pronoun. I think it would be better for my image anyway.”
“Oh yes, by all means make sure you start covering your tracks. Maybe if you act like a complete heterosexual no one will ever know you sinned.” Kris could hear the sarcasm in Katy’s voice and was confused.
Kris responded defensively, “What will your family think if you date a bisexual man? I am doing this for you.”
“Thanks for the sentiment but frankly I don’t give a flying fuck what my family thinks and they certainly don’t factor into my love life. Kris, I don’t care what you sing or what you don’t sing. Just because I am your friend or maybe even a future girlfriend, what you chose to sing doesn’t matter. It is your life and your career. Kris, stop giving other people power and just do what YOU want to do. If you want to sing a song about Adam, then do it and for heaven’s sake don’t apologize.”
Kris smiled, “You are the most balanced person I know. I love you, Katy, I really do.”
The day of the show, they had to go to the Nokia theater for a sound check and quick run through. It went well but on the way back he and Allison decided to sneak away for white chocolate raspberry mocha lattes. While there, they were accosted by some paps,
“Kris how do you feel about Adam getting another boyfriend?”
“Do you know the blonde guy?”
“Are you swearing off men?”
Kris was confused, “Adam doesn’t do boyfriends. Believe me I should know.” Kris knew better than to answer them but did anyway.
“So you don’t think Adam has a new lover?”
“Adam always has plenty of lovers that doesn’t mean he is dating them. He doesn’t date and he doesn’t do boyfriends. Adam Lambert gets laid, end of story.”
Kris noticed Allison staring at him with her jaw on the ground. Shit. Kris pulled Allison out of the Starbucks and they headed back to the mansion. Kris knew it was going to be all over the media and probably cost him the competition.
Once back at the mansion, Kris googled Adam and saw shots of him partying it up with a cute blonde on his lap. One of the headlines read, “Does Adam Lambert have a new friend?” It showed another shot of Adam with the same blonde in a different setting. Adam never does twinks twice! Kris was nauseous and angry. That fucking bastard! It was two hours before showtime and there was no way Kris was going to sing “Ain’t no sunshine.”
Kris flagged down one of the crew and told them he didn’t need the piano for the second number and he would just play guitar. All his coaches advised him against changing his song this late in the game. Even Allison freaked, “Kris, I want to win but you shouldn’t mess with your song this late. You were nailing it in rehearsal.”
“Ali, I can’t be a hypocrite. You heard what I told those paps and so will the voters. I don’t feel that song, I want to do ‘Heartless’. I am feeling that one.”
The show began. Kris opened with Simon Fuller’s choice, “What going on?” It got mixed reviews. Kris was still seething about the photos by the time he hit the stage for “Heartless”. Kris belted it out and felt a little emotional singing it and hoped it worked. Kris finished and stood by the judges.
Randy went first, “I loved when you did that song last week but I don’t know, dog, for me for you that just wasn’t the right choice. It seemed almost angry.”
Paula went next, “Yeah there was a little bitterness and you hit some bum notes. But, I am proud of you. I know this has been a hard journey for you and there has been a lot of distractions but you made it. Good job.”
Kara nodded, “Yeah…Kris, it just didn’t seem like you. I picture you softer and you lost the qualities that made it so good last week.”
Kris wasn’t feeling good and dreaded the next comment. Simon shook his head, “I thought you were going to do “Ain’t no Sunshine”.
“I-I couldn’t sing that. Not now.”
Simon shook his head again, “You know Kris one of the things I liked about you was your ability to forget everything and perform. However, tonight you brought your problems on the stage and it probably will cost you the competition. That was a terrible performance. The difference between you and your friend that won a few years ago is he would never have let you affect his performance. It was a stupid song choice.”
Kris snapped, “That’s because he doesn’t care about anything and he gets to act like a Diva while everyone just accepts it because he is the great Glambert. I couldn’t sing ‘Ain’t no sunshine’ because frankly my life is a thousand times better without him!”
There was dead silence in the theater until Simon spoke again, “Are you drunk?”
Kris just walked off the stage and wanted to die. He humiliated himself in front of millions of people. There was a knock on the door, “Kris, it’s me, Katy. Open the door, you have to go on again in ten minutes. Can I come in?”
Kris opened the door and immediately hugged her. She held him as he cried, “I just ruined my whole life. I humiliated myself in front of the whole world. I can’t go back on that stage.”
Katy held him and tried to soothe him. Kris was having a breakdown. Kris could hear people mumbling outside the dressing room. Katy went to the door and Kris heard her tell his mother he was fine and just needed a few minutes. Kris just kept his head down. Katy grabbed Kris’ cell phone off the counter and pressed a button. Kris was too emotionally raw to even think about what she was doing.
“Adam, this is Katy…did you see the show…Kris, doesn’t want to get back on the stage and I can’t convince him to do it anyway…hold on.” Katy held the phone out to Kris, “Please take the phone.”
Kris reluctantly took the phone even though Adam was the last person he wanted to speak to, “Hello?”
“Simon’s damn right I would never fuck up a performance like you just did. I don’t know what got into you but you better pull your head out of your ass for the last song. You owe it to all the people that have been voting for you.”
This was not helping, “Adam, I humiliated myself. I can’t go back out there. You were right I am not cut out for this.”
“Kris, I was wrong you are talented and deserve to make it in music. If you ever want to work in this town, you better get your ass out there. Kris, you can do this. I know you messed up and you probably blew your chances at the crown but you need to finish the competition. What’s done is done. People mess up but you have to show you can recover. You are one of the most resilient people I know, show the world that Kris Allen can take a licking and keep on ticking.”
Kris laughed, “I am not the energizer, rabbit.”
“Mm, sometimes you are. Now, go out there and sing your little heart out. Forget about the audience, forget about me, definitely forget about Barbie and just sing for you. Don’t pass up the moment of your life for anyone. You got this one, cute guy.”
Kris felt a little better, “What if I screw up?”
“Babe, you really can’t top that emotional outburst. You have nothing to lose, so nothing to fear. Now hurry up it looks like the commercials are almost over.”
Kris remembered why he loved Adam and Adam’s honesty. Kris hung up feeling determined. Kris wiped his tears and looked at Katy. “Why did you call him?”
She shrugged, “I was hoping he could talk you down when I couldn’t. Now go!”
Kris went back on stage and just tuned out the whole audience. He sang, “No boundaries” better than he had all week. The judges praised him on the song. Simon, however, addressed the elephant in the room, “Well, I think you still blew the competition with your emotional melt down but good for you coming back strong. I actually think you might have the spirit to make it in this business after all. Good luck.”
After the show, they were taken straight back to the mansion. They had a big day ahead with the finale. Kris avoided talking to his family especially because he could see the disappointment in his father’s eyes. Kris fell right to sleep. He woke up the next day and found the handlers had disabled the internet in the house. No one was letting them see or hear the media. They were even forced to give up their cell phones. Kris was glad in a way since he was sure the press had been negative. He had sent two tickets to Brad since the finale was going to be awesome and he hadn’t spoke to him in a while. After getting to the theater, Kris had to laugh when he saw a sparkly Brad with a tall drag queen sitting next to Katy. His mother and father were just sitting stiffly staring straight ahead.
The show began and Kris was excited to perform with Keith Urban and Allison performed with Heart. Unfortunately, he had to see some of the other contestants. Danny came over, “I can’t believe you embarrassed yourself on national TV. You would have been better off if they had voted YOU out last week.”
“Yeah but they didn’t. Too bad historically, the third place contestant never does well after the show. It’s like a cursed spot.”
Kris walked away. Finally they go to the end. Kris stood arm and arm with Allison as Ryan read the results, “After the nationwide vote of one hundred million votes, your next American Idol is…Allison Iraheta.”
Kris actually felt relieved and happy for Allison. He immediately twirled her around. Thank god it was over! Kris stood on the sidelines watching Allison sing her heart out. He looked out in the audience and saw his father and mother shaking their heads. Katy and Brad were smiling. Katy waved to him and he blew her a kiss.
After the show, they did a bunch of press and Kris just played off his breakdown to nerves and being exhausted. He also maintained he loved Allison like a sister and couldn’t be happier that she won. It was a crazy few days where they were shuffled from one media event to another. As the runner-up, Kris had just as much press to do as Allison. He had no time to see or talk to anyone. Kris intentionally avoided the internet and refused to speak about Adam.
Finally, a week later they were given a morning off before a huge “Idol Gives Back” event. Kris spent the morning catching up on sleep and getting coffee with Katy. They didn’t talk about idol and instead just had a nice time being normal. He was taking her to the show as his date. That night he picked her up and she looked beautiful in a rose colored evening gown. They showed up at the red carpet and the media seemed to love them. Kris knew they made a pretty couple.
Once inside, Kris got them a couple glasses of champagne and started to mingle. He froze when he saw Adam dressed to the nines in stylish black suit. It had some sparkle and signature accessories. He looked stunning. Kris couldn’t help staring. Adam looked over and their eyes locked. Kris felt his breath catch at the intensity of Adam’s gaze.
Katy coughed, “Perhaps we should just go over and say hello. It is obvious he has seen you.”
“Sorry, are you OK with this. If he gets obnoxious, we will walk away.”
They went over and Kris noticed a blonde guy standing close to Adam. Kris put his arm around Katy, “Hello Adam, you remember Katy.”
Adam smiled, “Of course, you look so…precious in pink, like a doll.”
Kris tensed but Katy smiled, “Well, thank you, Adam. It is every girl’s dream to be compared to Barbie.”
Kris bit his tongue not to laugh at Katy’s response. He was happy she was not intimidated by Adam. Judging by Adam’s expression, the sarcasm was not lost on him. Adam put his arm around the blonde guy and smiled proudly, “Fair enough. I’d like to introduce you to my boyfriend, Dev.”
BOYFRIEND! Kris felt his heart break. Wait, Adam doesn’t do boyfriends…
The pressure was on the night of the performance. His father came backstage to give him a pep talk, “Son, I am so proud of you. For the last few years you have been pretty unimpressive and I thought you would never become anything. Well, here you are being fairly successful. So I just hope you don’t sabotage yourself like you usually do and instead, do good. I think now that you have gotten over your…little problem, God may be on your side.”
Some cheerleader! Kris looked at his father, “My little problem?”
Neil Allen looked really uncomfortable, “Son, let’s not discuss the terrible sins you committed. The important thing is you have turned back into the light and now you are with a beautiful girl and appearing on national TV. Good job.”
Kris could not bring himself to see Adam as a terrible sin. Sure, a source of frustration, a perpetual diva, even an open wound but not a terrible sin. Kris looked at his father, “For the record, I am only on national TV because of Adam. If I hadn’t met him, I would never have had the courage to pursue my dream.”
Neil shifted, “Son he took advantage of your weakness. You had just been jilted and he led you down a dark road. I know you aren’t really unnatural so let’s not ever mention your transgressions. I am sure Katy doesn’t want to know you were friends with someone like that.”
Kris just shook his head, “Friends? We were lovers, Dad. If being with him was a sin, I committed a lot of them and God help me, I would do it again in a heartbeat.”
Neil smacked him, “Watch your mouth. Son, you had better seek help before you ruin everything. Why do you always try and disappoint your mother and me? You could have the whole world at your feet with a good woman on your side and instead, you talk of being with an abomination. Son, I am going to pray for your soul and hope you do the right thing.”
Neil walked out and Kris felt shaky. Katy came over a few minutes later, “Hi, are you ready for your big night?”
“I guess. I just had a big blowout with my father.”
“Well, he can be a little small minded so I am not surprised. Well, whatever it was about, forget it. You don’t need their approval and you certainly don’t owe your success to them.”
“Thanks, you are a good person and it means a lot that you are here supporting me.”
“Always. And when you become a big star, you better let me act in your videos so I can get some exposure.”
“Deal.” Kris hugged her and kissed her softly on the lips. Before Kris knew it, he kissed her longer. Katy responded for a few seconds and then pulled back, “Kris, as much as I want to kiss you and be with you, I think we should wait until the dust settles and you sort yourself out. Let’s not rush into anything.”
Kris felt embarrassed, “I am sorry, Katy.”
“I’m not. I just think we should wait. Now, go kick Danny’s ass.”
Kris smiled as he watched her go back to the audience seats. Kris thought about the kiss and how nice it was. It was tender and sweet. It was very different than the all consuming kisses he shared with Adam. When Adam kissed him, he couldn’t even think. Adam was much more aggressive and made his knees buckle. It was as if nothing existed outside of the kiss. No, it was better to have control and moderation. Kris once again thought in the long run Katy’s temperament might suit him more. Yet, the thought of kissing Adam stirred his loins and made his heart ache. How could Adam just not call and apparently move on? Kris went on stage with just his guitar
In the night I hear 'em talk,
The coldest story ever told,
Somewhere far along this road
He lost his soul,
To SOMEONE so heartless
How could you be so heartless?
Oh, how could you be so heartless?...
Kris finished the song and got nothing put love form the judges. Allison and Danny both did good. Kris really hoped he and Allison made it to the finals but he was happy that people were finally talking about his singing rather than his sexuality or pictures. His more family friendly image was winning over the younger crowd. Kris sang, “Wanna kiss the Girl” by Keith Urban and kept it gender specific since it was for Katy. Ryan came over after the song and asked if there was a special someone that was for?”
Kris blushed, “Kind of but like I said I am taking a break from relationships. Who knows maybe when the dust settles, I’ll get my kiss.”
The judges weren’t as impressed with that performance and Simon called him clumsy. Kris hoped it didn’t cost him the competition. That night they all went to celebrate the performance. Kris still was still angry at his father but for everyone sake he was civil. Kris watched Katy and his mother chatting about makeup like best friends. Kris smiled when he thought what it would be like if Adam met his parents. Although his mother would be appalled, Adam could probably talk about makeup more than Katy. Once again he felt a pang. His phone rang and Kris excused himself to answer it, “Hey Adam, how are you?”
“Having the time of my life, babe. Hey thanks for the song, it was really sweet that I got “heartless” while the blonde bimbo got, “I wanna kiss the girl”.”
Here we go. Kris hoped to avoid a fight, “Maybe it was about Julie.”
“Really, than you would have kept the word ‘woman’ let’s not pretend I am stupid. Anyway, whatever, despite the sentiment, it was a good version of Kanye’s hit. The judges were right about the other tune. Aside from it being a shitty song you looked like an awkward high school hick trying to get laid at the prom. I hope she puts out before you get booted off the show.”
Kris could not believe after weeks of not talking, Adam just laid into him like that, “Fuck you. If you called just to be an asshole, mission accomplished you can hang up now.”
“Actually, I didn’t intend be so bitchy. I just can’t believe how quickly you transfer affections for people. Well, the media loves your new family friendly gig. Are you going to start denying we ever had anything?” Kris could tell Adam’s words were slurring a bit.
“Are you drunk?”
“No, I only had a few shots and a couple tokes. Why are you gonna criticize me for that too? I am sure Ms. Apple pie doesn’t ever indulge.”
“Why do you hate Katy so much? She is a great person and a friend of mine.”
Adam’s tone softened, “I hate her because she is the reason you don’t miss me. Why don’t you miss me?”
Kris sighed, “I do. I miss you all the time but you refuse to change and I can’t keep compromising my principles even for you.”
“Are you going dating her?”
Kris wanted to be honest, “No but I am thinking about it. Can you give me a good reason not to?”
Adam was quiet and then said softly, “No, I guess not.”
Prick! Kris was glad he had held his ground since it was obvious Adam was still not willing to give in, “OK, well anything else?”
“Good luck and whatever happens on the show, you already showed the world just how good you are. Plus, you still get to go on tour even if you lose. Enjoy the spotlight, you never know when it will fade.”
Kris hung up and had no clue why Adam bothered to call or act jealous. It was his fault they were apart. Kris went to results night and was ecstatic when it was announced he and Allison would be in the finals. The next week was fast and furious getting ready for the finale and having to perform three songs. He would be performing, “Ain’t no Sunshine”, “
“What’s going on?” and “No boundaries”. Kris had dinner with Katy the day before the final two performance show and told her about his song choice. He was worried she would be upset, “I am thinking of doing ‘Ain’t no sunshine’ but I will change the pronoun to she.”
Katy smiled, “Kris, when you sang that song it was beautiful because you really meant it. Everyone could see the pain and regret in your eyes. That song is about Adam not me. If you don’t feel that way now, don’t do the song.”
“It’s over between me and him. I need to move on and I don’t want to ruin things between us. I don’t want to remind the world that Adam and I…were together. It is not fair to you.””
“Kris, don’t you dare start using me as your emotional crutch. Look, I care about you and I do hope we can be together someday. However, I don’t want to pretend you are something other than you. I am not your parents and I accept you had a relationship with Adam. I also know you still have feelings for him. Like I said, if you mean it than sing it. If not do another song.”
Kris looked at Katy, “Well, I can still change the pronoun. I think it would be better for my image anyway.”
“Oh yes, by all means make sure you start covering your tracks. Maybe if you act like a complete heterosexual no one will ever know you sinned.” Kris could hear the sarcasm in Katy’s voice and was confused.
Kris responded defensively, “What will your family think if you date a bisexual man? I am doing this for you.”
“Thanks for the sentiment but frankly I don’t give a flying fuck what my family thinks and they certainly don’t factor into my love life. Kris, I don’t care what you sing or what you don’t sing. Just because I am your friend or maybe even a future girlfriend, what you chose to sing doesn’t matter. It is your life and your career. Kris, stop giving other people power and just do what YOU want to do. If you want to sing a song about Adam, then do it and for heaven’s sake don’t apologize.”
Kris smiled, “You are the most balanced person I know. I love you, Katy, I really do.”
The day of the show, they had to go to the Nokia theater for a sound check and quick run through. It went well but on the way back he and Allison decided to sneak away for white chocolate raspberry mocha lattes. While there, they were accosted by some paps,
“Kris how do you feel about Adam getting another boyfriend?”
“Do you know the blonde guy?”
“Are you swearing off men?”
Kris was confused, “Adam doesn’t do boyfriends. Believe me I should know.” Kris knew better than to answer them but did anyway.
“So you don’t think Adam has a new lover?”
“Adam always has plenty of lovers that doesn’t mean he is dating them. He doesn’t date and he doesn’t do boyfriends. Adam Lambert gets laid, end of story.”
Kris noticed Allison staring at him with her jaw on the ground. Shit. Kris pulled Allison out of the Starbucks and they headed back to the mansion. Kris knew it was going to be all over the media and probably cost him the competition.
Once back at the mansion, Kris googled Adam and saw shots of him partying it up with a cute blonde on his lap. One of the headlines read, “Does Adam Lambert have a new friend?” It showed another shot of Adam with the same blonde in a different setting. Adam never does twinks twice! Kris was nauseous and angry. That fucking bastard! It was two hours before showtime and there was no way Kris was going to sing “Ain’t no sunshine.”
Kris flagged down one of the crew and told them he didn’t need the piano for the second number and he would just play guitar. All his coaches advised him against changing his song this late in the game. Even Allison freaked, “Kris, I want to win but you shouldn’t mess with your song this late. You were nailing it in rehearsal.”
“Ali, I can’t be a hypocrite. You heard what I told those paps and so will the voters. I don’t feel that song, I want to do ‘Heartless’. I am feeling that one.”
The show began. Kris opened with Simon Fuller’s choice, “What going on?” It got mixed reviews. Kris was still seething about the photos by the time he hit the stage for “Heartless”. Kris belted it out and felt a little emotional singing it and hoped it worked. Kris finished and stood by the judges.
Randy went first, “I loved when you did that song last week but I don’t know, dog, for me for you that just wasn’t the right choice. It seemed almost angry.”
Paula went next, “Yeah there was a little bitterness and you hit some bum notes. But, I am proud of you. I know this has been a hard journey for you and there has been a lot of distractions but you made it. Good job.”
Kara nodded, “Yeah…Kris, it just didn’t seem like you. I picture you softer and you lost the qualities that made it so good last week.”
Kris wasn’t feeling good and dreaded the next comment. Simon shook his head, “I thought you were going to do “Ain’t no Sunshine”.
“I-I couldn’t sing that. Not now.”
Simon shook his head again, “You know Kris one of the things I liked about you was your ability to forget everything and perform. However, tonight you brought your problems on the stage and it probably will cost you the competition. That was a terrible performance. The difference between you and your friend that won a few years ago is he would never have let you affect his performance. It was a stupid song choice.”
Kris snapped, “That’s because he doesn’t care about anything and he gets to act like a Diva while everyone just accepts it because he is the great Glambert. I couldn’t sing ‘Ain’t no sunshine’ because frankly my life is a thousand times better without him!”
There was dead silence in the theater until Simon spoke again, “Are you drunk?”
Kris just walked off the stage and wanted to die. He humiliated himself in front of millions of people. There was a knock on the door, “Kris, it’s me, Katy. Open the door, you have to go on again in ten minutes. Can I come in?”
Kris opened the door and immediately hugged her. She held him as he cried, “I just ruined my whole life. I humiliated myself in front of the whole world. I can’t go back on that stage.”
Katy held him and tried to soothe him. Kris was having a breakdown. Kris could hear people mumbling outside the dressing room. Katy went to the door and Kris heard her tell his mother he was fine and just needed a few minutes. Kris just kept his head down. Katy grabbed Kris’ cell phone off the counter and pressed a button. Kris was too emotionally raw to even think about what she was doing.
“Adam, this is Katy…did you see the show…Kris, doesn’t want to get back on the stage and I can’t convince him to do it anyway…hold on.” Katy held the phone out to Kris, “Please take the phone.”
Kris reluctantly took the phone even though Adam was the last person he wanted to speak to, “Hello?”
“Simon’s damn right I would never fuck up a performance like you just did. I don’t know what got into you but you better pull your head out of your ass for the last song. You owe it to all the people that have been voting for you.”
This was not helping, “Adam, I humiliated myself. I can’t go back out there. You were right I am not cut out for this.”
“Kris, I was wrong you are talented and deserve to make it in music. If you ever want to work in this town, you better get your ass out there. Kris, you can do this. I know you messed up and you probably blew your chances at the crown but you need to finish the competition. What’s done is done. People mess up but you have to show you can recover. You are one of the most resilient people I know, show the world that Kris Allen can take a licking and keep on ticking.”
Kris laughed, “I am not the energizer, rabbit.”
“Mm, sometimes you are. Now, go out there and sing your little heart out. Forget about the audience, forget about me, definitely forget about Barbie and just sing for you. Don’t pass up the moment of your life for anyone. You got this one, cute guy.”
Kris felt a little better, “What if I screw up?”
“Babe, you really can’t top that emotional outburst. You have nothing to lose, so nothing to fear. Now hurry up it looks like the commercials are almost over.”
Kris remembered why he loved Adam and Adam’s honesty. Kris hung up feeling determined. Kris wiped his tears and looked at Katy. “Why did you call him?”
She shrugged, “I was hoping he could talk you down when I couldn’t. Now go!”
Kris went back on stage and just tuned out the whole audience. He sang, “No boundaries” better than he had all week. The judges praised him on the song. Simon, however, addressed the elephant in the room, “Well, I think you still blew the competition with your emotional melt down but good for you coming back strong. I actually think you might have the spirit to make it in this business after all. Good luck.”
After the show, they were taken straight back to the mansion. They had a big day ahead with the finale. Kris avoided talking to his family especially because he could see the disappointment in his father’s eyes. Kris fell right to sleep. He woke up the next day and found the handlers had disabled the internet in the house. No one was letting them see or hear the media. They were even forced to give up their cell phones. Kris was glad in a way since he was sure the press had been negative. He had sent two tickets to Brad since the finale was going to be awesome and he hadn’t spoke to him in a while. After getting to the theater, Kris had to laugh when he saw a sparkly Brad with a tall drag queen sitting next to Katy. His mother and father were just sitting stiffly staring straight ahead.
The show began and Kris was excited to perform with Keith Urban and Allison performed with Heart. Unfortunately, he had to see some of the other contestants. Danny came over, “I can’t believe you embarrassed yourself on national TV. You would have been better off if they had voted YOU out last week.”
“Yeah but they didn’t. Too bad historically, the third place contestant never does well after the show. It’s like a cursed spot.”
Kris walked away. Finally they go to the end. Kris stood arm and arm with Allison as Ryan read the results, “After the nationwide vote of one hundred million votes, your next American Idol is…Allison Iraheta.”
Kris actually felt relieved and happy for Allison. He immediately twirled her around. Thank god it was over! Kris stood on the sidelines watching Allison sing her heart out. He looked out in the audience and saw his father and mother shaking their heads. Katy and Brad were smiling. Katy waved to him and he blew her a kiss.
After the show, they did a bunch of press and Kris just played off his breakdown to nerves and being exhausted. He also maintained he loved Allison like a sister and couldn’t be happier that she won. It was a crazy few days where they were shuffled from one media event to another. As the runner-up, Kris had just as much press to do as Allison. He had no time to see or talk to anyone. Kris intentionally avoided the internet and refused to speak about Adam.
Finally, a week later they were given a morning off before a huge “Idol Gives Back” event. Kris spent the morning catching up on sleep and getting coffee with Katy. They didn’t talk about idol and instead just had a nice time being normal. He was taking her to the show as his date. That night he picked her up and she looked beautiful in a rose colored evening gown. They showed up at the red carpet and the media seemed to love them. Kris knew they made a pretty couple.
Once inside, Kris got them a couple glasses of champagne and started to mingle. He froze when he saw Adam dressed to the nines in stylish black suit. It had some sparkle and signature accessories. He looked stunning. Kris couldn’t help staring. Adam looked over and their eyes locked. Kris felt his breath catch at the intensity of Adam’s gaze.
Katy coughed, “Perhaps we should just go over and say hello. It is obvious he has seen you.”
“Sorry, are you OK with this. If he gets obnoxious, we will walk away.”
They went over and Kris noticed a blonde guy standing close to Adam. Kris put his arm around Katy, “Hello Adam, you remember Katy.”
Adam smiled, “Of course, you look so…precious in pink, like a doll.”
Kris tensed but Katy smiled, “Well, thank you, Adam. It is every girl’s dream to be compared to Barbie.”
Kris bit his tongue not to laugh at Katy’s response. He was happy she was not intimidated by Adam. Judging by Adam’s expression, the sarcasm was not lost on him. Adam put his arm around the blonde guy and smiled proudly, “Fair enough. I’d like to introduce you to my boyfriend, Dev.”
BOYFRIEND! Kris felt his heart break. Wait, Adam doesn’t do boyfriends…