Bits & Pieces #14: The Serpent's Eye 1
Title: Bits and Pieces: #14 The Serpent's Eye
Author: Pink Rabbit Productions
Part: 1
Spoilers: Politics, Within the Serpent's Grasp
Archive: The Pink Rabbit Consortium (www.altfic.com)
DISCLAIMER: It all belongs to assorted other folks (MGM, Gekko, Double Secret, Showtime, and possibly Santa Claus for all I know), or at least the characters, settings, situations, et al do. The actual arrangement of words is mine own, though God knows, if any of those entities were to opt to sue, I'd disavow them all in a New York second. There's definitely musing on matters of a sexual and romantic nature between females of the same genderish persuasion, so if this is a problem of age, maturity, intelligence, ability to deal, or anything else, please, do take a pass.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Well, this one has been on hiatus for awhile now. This part was first written a couple of years ago, and I never managed to finish the second part. However, I’m currently working on continuing the series, so I called on my friendly neighborhood beta reader (who is an angel) and got this tuned up (the unedited version has been up on the site for awhile). It’s cleaner and reads tighter, but no major changes. All previous notes about the concept behind the series stand.
SPECIAL THANKS: to ocean gazer, who also happens to be the most caffeinated and cheerful minion around.
ADDITIONAL AUTHOR'S NOTES: Silly me didn't notice that the order for first season eps listed on assorted webpages doesn't quite mesh with what's on the box my DVD set came in, sooooo, though I don't think it ever matters too much, in case anyone cares, I'm using the order on the DVD set.
The earlier stories in the series can be found here
Now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field...
Genesis 3:1
Bits and Pieces 14:
The Serpent's Eye
Part 1
Prologue
Hathor was annoyed. Having been wakened and taken control of the Tau'ri military base for her new lair, she suddenly faced losing that starting point for her new empire. She should have killed the women the moment they showed the faintest hint of resistance, should have snapped Janet Fraiser's neck while Samantha Carter looked on. A faint smile curved full lips as she contemplated the look of pain that would have entered blue eyes. And when the agony had truly invaded Carter’s heart, she should have strangled the bitch and watched the light fade from her eyes. Dead, she would have been no threat.
Instead, she'd held back, been kind, even willing to give the women a place in her new empire. Now look what it had gotten her. According to the reports coming in, the blonde bitch and her cohort were busy taking back her base. A mewling Tau'ri voice brought her out of her thoughts to consider the male supplicant kneeling before her.
Tony Phillips stared up at his goddess with adoring eyes, so lost in her beauty he could barely think straight. "I'm sorry, My Goddess," he breathed, his hands dangling at his sides as he knelt before the Goa'uld. His wrists were red and abraded from his efforts to escape the shoelaces used as impromptu bonds by the escaped women. "In succumbing to their tricks, I failed you." It was his mistake that had allowed Captain Carter and the other women to escape and move against his goddess.
"Yes," Hathor confirmed, her eyes ice cold with barely contained fury. She had kept the women alive because of their beauty -- used as rewards, they would have helped keep the men in line -- and it was particularly infuriating to realize they'd turned it around and used that beauty as a weapon against her, seducing the men into making a dangerous mistake. She caressed the kneeling male's cheek, stroking lightly, then tucked her finger under his chin, drawing his head up. It would be so easy to simply break his neck, and she seriously considered it. The Tau'ri were such a fragile species.
She leaned down, eyes glowing faintly as she studied him. "Tell me something," she said very softly, her voice a threatening rumble. The other system lords would pounce if she attempted to simply leave this world without any kind of leverage. She knew her own kind. They were no gentler with one another than they were with the species they ruled. However, they could be bargained with. Perhaps with information to trade, she could regain some of her might and use it to begin rebuilding her power base. That the System Lords were desperate to destroy the Tau'ri was obvious to anyone from the reports she'd read; that they were afraid of them was obvious only to her. "I wish information."
He swallowed hard. "Wh-what about security codes." He worked security; playing in the computer was his hobby. He knew how to dig up all sorts of obscure bits of information, and would be more than happy to do so to please his goddess.
She shook her head, well aware such information would be changed the moment she left this world. She pulled him up, thrusting him toward the nearest computer. "Something else... something they wouldn't think of." A hint of a smile touched her lips. "Something to make Captain Carter bleed." Something to buy her both power and revenge again the Tau'ri witch who dared stand against her would be ideal.
His fingers danced over the keyboard, bringing up information that for the most part was of no use to her; either security information that would change or scientific information so primitive it was of no value. And then another file went by. "That," she commanded.
In tribute to Hathor, Hammond had virtually disabled the security system, giving their queen total access, so it opened where Tony would normally have been denied access.
A smile touched full lips as she scanned through the contents of the dossier. So General Hammond had plans to save his best and brightest and keep up the fight if the base was attacked. Definitely something that might have trade value. "You've done well, my child," she murmured as she mentally stored the information away.
Tony fairly glowed under the faint praise, his eyes alight with worship when she stroked his cheek and smiled down at him. "Did you enjoy the taste of your chosen, my child?" she drawled, eyes gleaming with malicious glee. He had confessed the shared kiss that had been his downfall, his head down, his voice raw with shame, but she had seen way his skin flushed and his hands trembled. She knew the power she wielded over men and women, knew how he was now bound to the Tau'ri doctor. And knew that even without this information she could have some measure of revenge. Carter had such soft eyes, eyes so easily read, eyes that would fill with pain when she lost the other woman ... particularly in light of what Tony Phillips was likely to do to Janet Fraiser.
An eager nod tipped his head up and down. "Let me bring her into your fold, My Goddess," he pleaded, his body burning with heat at the thought of the coupling Samantha Carter's attack had denied him.
"Of course." Hathor leaned close, her breath dusting his ear, the musty scent of sex and desire teasing his nostrils. "She's yours ... remember that." And then she whispered a thousand other things, all so fast and so soft he barely understood them at all, though in the days that followed, they would change his life -- and not for the better.
Weaving unsteadily on his feet, some part of him fighting the ugly suggestions, he nonetheless nodded.
"My Goddess," a young lieutenant broke in, his voice panicked. "Those who would attack your Greatness have been spotted moving toward your sarcophagus.
Eyes suddenly blazing, she straightened. That could not be allowed. She leaned close to Tony Phillips one more time, her voice an angry hiss. "Make her bleed." Then she slammed him into the wall hard enough to send him to the floor in an unconscious heap.
"Move," she snapped to the waiting lieutenant as she brushed past him. "Enter the coordinates I gave you into the gate ... while I deal with other matters."
* * * * * *
Several Months Later
The SGC was shutting down. No second chances, no argument, no turning back, and - oh, by the way - no funding for any further projects. All experimental projects were to be closed down, the results turned in to the oversight committees, the files shut down and blanked from the computers, any excess papers shredded and the shred burned. All extra-terrestrial objects were to be boxed up, carted off, and permanently locked down in government storehouses designed for just such occasions.
And what about a living, breathing extra-terrestrial artifact, Janet Fraiser found herself wondering as she sat across the desk from her commanding officer, her stomach so knotted with tension she was on the verge of throwing up. It wasn't like she didn't already have enough stress in her life. Sam's sudden exit from her backyard two nights before had seen to that. She'd tried to phone the woman only to have her calls ignored, and after making certain she was on base, tried to see her only to find she was suddenly missing from all of her usual haunts. And now this. She had to fight to contain a hysterical burst of laughter. And here she'd thought she'd finally gotten her life a little settled.
Fat chance of that. She should have remembered that calm, quiet, and orderly had never been her specialty and let it go at that.
"You can understand why we need to get the matter of Cassandra's custody squared away quickly," General Hammond said grimly, breaking in on her dark thoughts.
Janet nodded, eyes fastened on her own hand where it rested on the edge of his desk. "How much time do we have?" she asked, her voice a hoarse rasp of tension and fear.
"A week at most," the general answered. "Colonel Samuels is doing everything in his power to undermine my position, but he hasn't gotten around to what he views as the minor details yet." He was breaking the rules in giving her the heads up, but of all of the people under his command, she was, in many respects, facing the most difficult problem.
"There's no question?" she whispered.
He quashed her hopes with a cruelty borne of kindness. "None. The mission is a dead issue ... and Samuels is pressing to have Cassandra turned over to NID for further study. Once responsibility for her custody is turned over to his command, I won't have any further options."
A muscle compressed along the ridge of Janet's cheek, the only outward sign of the emotional impact of the news. No time left for debate or consideration. Either the child was hers to fight for, or she surrendered her to people who would have everything but her best interests at heart. Oh, they wouldn't dissect Cassandra -- even NID had a few limits -- but they wouldn't care for her either, wouldn't treat her like a child, but rather as an experiment to be put under glass and studied. Finding a nice couple with the appropriate security clearance to become Cassie's parents was no longer an option. In another few days, NID would take custody, and from there she would wind up as little more than a lab rat. There was only one small loophole. Legally, Hammond still had absolute discretion over her case, but that would be going away in a few days. Sign off now, and she'd have grounds for fighting it in a military court if anyone tried to take Cass away from her. Her throat constricted with sheer terror as she considered what she was letting herself in for, especially now---and possibly without Sam's help or support. She considered asking for a little time to consider it all, but time was no longer a luxury she could afford. Once the committee started dotting i's and crossing t's any time, they would lose this window of opportunity. Finally, she nodded, forcing the terror down to respond. "Okay."
Hammond pushed the necessary paperwork forward. He'd already had everything prepared, had seen to it the moment the child went to live with his CMO, half afraid even then that this moment might come. He watched her sign each of the papers in question---her signature far less steady than usual---well aware of her doubts and fears, but also confident it was going to be all right. He'd have been more worried if she hadn't been scared to death. Parenthood, no matter how it came about, wasn't something to be entered into lightly. And now she was looking at possibly having to fight the entire government top of the difficulties Cassie already had.
Finally, she shoved the stack of forms back at him and sat there, visibly shaken by the monumental task she'd just chosen for herself. "I ... uh ... I really should...." Should what? Sit there babbling like an idiot? She really had no idea what she should be doing. For the moment, the infirmary was quiet. And with all teams restricted to base, it wasn't likely to get any busier. With no ready conclusion to the sentence, she just sat there, staring at the surface of her C.O.'s desk.
"Take the rest of the day off, Doctor," he said gently, offering an encouraging smile when she looked up, appearing less the competent officer he was used to than a scared teenager handed far more responsibility than she felt ready for. He saw her draw breath to argue and held up a hand to forestall her refusal. "Nothing's going to happen today ... and your division is under control. Keep your cell phone with you," he added in deference to their situation. "But get out of here for a little while." She was likely to find herself in the middle of a fight soon enough.
She finally nodded, throwing off some of the paralytic shock with effort. "Thank you, sir." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "For everything." She looked down at her own hands. "I know you're taking a chance in doing this ... Samuels already hates your guts...." She didn't bother to finish.
Hammond shrugged practically. "I was a month from retirement when I took this command. My career was already ending." His gaze sharpened, reminding her of what she'd taken on. "You're in a far more precarious position than I am."
"I took responsibility for her," Janet said softly. "But I didn't really plan on ... any of this," she admitted a little haltingly, already working her way through her shock. She took another deep breath and let it out on a slow count. "But some days life's like that."
"Indeed it is," Hammond murmured, proud of how quickly she regained her footing. "Now, get out of here while we can spare you. We'll be burying the gate in two days, but for the moment, you're not needed here." He saw her frown, worried about leaving the base now that she was mentally tracking again. "Consider it an order, Doctor." She'd been working hellacious hours for weeks, and the strain was starting to show ... or maybe it was something else, he thought as he assessed the shadows under her eyes, uncertain simple overwork would have caused what he was seeing. Of course, she was smart enough that she'd probably been worrying about the child's future since everything started to go wrong. Though as he looked more closely, he wasn't as confident as he would have liked that was the sole cause of what he was seeing.
She drew breath, still ready to argue, only to change her mind abruptly. "Thank you, sir," she said again, resolved to get the hell out of there once she took care of one thing.
Hammond looked pointedly at his watch, then nodded toward the door. "Go," he said not unkindly. "I've got several calls to make ... and then a meeting with Colonel O'Neill." His tone made it clear that he wasn't looking forward to any of it; not one more futile, last ditch stand to try and save the project, and not O'Neill's anger and disapproval because he couldn't do the impossible and didn't consider mutiny a viable option.
Fraiser still had enough of a sense of humor to offer a sympathetic smile. "For what it's worth, good luck, sir."
"You too, Doctor," he sighed, leaning back in his chair and watching as she slipped out. It was a hell of a thing, he thought as he considered the situation. She, and others who'd done a job very few people could, for lousy pay and scant thanks, were now being forced to fear for their careers ... and in her case, for a child who'd become her family. He shook his head sadly, feeling the guilt of being unable to save it all settle on his shoulders. And that was just the obvious price. God only knew what it might cost the entire planet down the line somewhere.
Finally, he shook off his grim musings and leaned forward, reaching for the phone as he readied himself for another round of fruitless arguments with politicians too short-sighted to see what their penny-pinching, partisan politics threatened to do to the nation ... hell, the whole damn world.
* * * * * *
"Hi," Janet said baldly as she entered Sam's lab, not giving her a chance to run away by sending word she was looking for her, sick that the only way to do this was by some kind of surprise attack.
Sam looked up, intelligent blue eyes widening in sheer panic for the briefest second before her expression closed down and the emotional wall went up. "Doctor Fraiser," she said formally, her stomach coiling with hurt at the way Janet flinched as though struck. It's for the best, she reminded herself as she clamped down on the urge to apologize and beg for forgiveness for as long as it took to wash away the pained look on the other woman's face.
The muscles along the line of Janet's jaw compressed and her cheek twitched. Her knuckles were white, Sam noted, where her hands were twined together in front of her.
"Can we just talk, please?" the doctor rasped, the hurt in her voice tearing at Sam's resolve in all the ways she'd known it would, leaving her to wonder how she'd managed to avoid the truth as long as she had. She supposed it was the same thing that had driven her to avoid this meeting -- sheer terror.
It took all of Sam's strength to keep her voice cool and step carefully around Janet to reach for something---she wasn't entirely certain what, but it made for a decent excuse to look anywhere but at the woman whose mere presence had such a shattering effect on her. "I'm afraid I don't really have much time right now." She felt rather than saw the flinch those coldly uttered words caused. "With everything that's going on, I've got a lot of work to do."
"I ... see..." Janet breathed and was silent for a long moment as she fought the urge to grab Sam and shake in an effort to get some kind of response.
Sam didn't have to turn and look to sense the hurt and anger rolling over the other woman. She swallowed hard, grateful she was facing the other direction, afraid that if she had to face her friend, her real feelings would be all too obvious. "Look, I really don't have time for this right now," she said as firmly as she was able, concentrating on the artifact in her hand; only minutes before she could have described every last detail of the analysis she'd done on the damn thing and at that moment, she couldn't even remember the Goa’uld word Teal’c had used for it, much less how it worked or what it did.
"I just wanted to talk to you about Cass ... with everything closing down ... there are issues...." Janet tried again, silently willing Sam to turn and face their problems like an adult, unable to believe that one drunken moment could undo everything they’d been through and all the promises that had been made.
Sam's hand clenched until the sharp edges of the alien artifact were cutting into her fingers and palm. Cass, God. She hadn't let herself think about the child and what her screw-up would mean for the girl. How the hell was she supposed to deal with everything now that the project was probably shutting down? She owed Cassie and Janet both, but had no idea how to follow through under the circumstances. "I ... uh...." She almost lost the cool tone as her voice bobbled faintly, but she got it under control again. "I think it's best if I arrange to see her while you're on duty ... so that she's got one of us with her during as much of the day as possible. With everything so confused, that might help her feel a little more stable."
The obvious evasion was met by a long moment of total silence, and then Janet's voice, angry and bitter, hit her like actual blows. "Don't bother lying, Sam. You don't do it worth a damn." Another moment's silence followed, broken only by the rhythmic sound of carefully controlled breathing. "I'm sorry for what happened," the doctor said at last, her tone flaying Carter alive, not with her anger, but with her hurt, her pain like knives on flesh. "I know I blew it, but--" The doctor cut herself off with an angry growl. "Screw it. I don't have time for this."
Teeth digging into her lower lip, Sam fought the urge to turn and beg forgiveness for even thinking of pulling away.
Janet turned to leave, then couldn’t, her temper too on edge to let her leave it like that. "Let me give you a piece of advice," she added, the bitterness back as she realized that whatever they’d had it was over now. "In the future, before you go making promises, make sure they're ones you can keep ... and maybe, just maybe, you could try a little forgiveness while you're at it."
It was too much for Sam to bear as she realized that Janet felt to blame for what had happened. "Janet," Sam whispered as she spun, but it was too late. The other woman was already gone. Fighting the urge to hurl the object in her hand, she set it aside with extra care, then slowly sank down onto a nearby stool, her legs shaky. "Get it under control, Carter," she muttered to herself, even as she struggled against the urge to go after her friend, to explain to her, or at least make excuses---whatever would work to put things right between them. Except even the slightest thought along those lines caused a surge of hope and want that only served to point out how dangerous the impulse was.
With the walls of denial and control that she'd used to protect herself so thoroughly shattered, Sam was spinning, her equilibrium thoroughly gone, and she had no idea how to get it back. Until she figured out a way to do that, the only thing she could think to do was stay as far away from Janet Fraiser as was humanly possible. No matter how much it might hurt, it was the best thing for both of them.
She ran a hand over her hair as she forced down any fantasies of following Janet through sheer force of will. It wouldn't gain either of them anything, not when emotions were so raw. Maybe later, when things had calmed, they could talk, work out what to do for Cass's sake, but for now, it just wasn't doable. Suddenly exhausted, Sam stepped back over to her computer, returning to the task she'd set for herself, concentrating on that and not the betrayal in the other woman's voice. She had a job to do and that took precedence over any other concerns. Despite her determination, it was a constant battle to keep her mind on the subject. So much so that when Colonel O'Neill called a meeting of SG-1 a short time later, it was a curious relief to have something so overwhelming to worry about.
After some discussion, knowing the gate was due to be closed and buried shortly, and with every reason to believe a Goa'uld mothership was headed for Earth, the team was going to gate to the coordinates Daniel had for the attack fleet from the other universe, and try to stop their own world from being destroyed . If they were right, and succeeded, Earth would be saved. If they were wrong, the best they could hope for was a court martial, the worst, failure and death a long way from home. It wasn't exactly a new possibility for any of them.
As she made the necessary plans, Sam found a moment to write two final emails, setting them to send on a time delay before hurrying to join her teammates for the last minute preparations.
* * * * * *
Author: Pink Rabbit Productions
Part: 1
Spoilers: Politics, Within the Serpent's Grasp
Archive: The Pink Rabbit Consortium (www.altfic.com)
DISCLAIMER: It all belongs to assorted other folks (MGM, Gekko, Double Secret, Showtime, and possibly Santa Claus for all I know), or at least the characters, settings, situations, et al do. The actual arrangement of words is mine own, though God knows, if any of those entities were to opt to sue, I'd disavow them all in a New York second. There's definitely musing on matters of a sexual and romantic nature between females of the same genderish persuasion, so if this is a problem of age, maturity, intelligence, ability to deal, or anything else, please, do take a pass.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Well, this one has been on hiatus for awhile now. This part was first written a couple of years ago, and I never managed to finish the second part. However, I’m currently working on continuing the series, so I called on my friendly neighborhood beta reader (who is an angel) and got this tuned up (the unedited version has been up on the site for awhile). It’s cleaner and reads tighter, but no major changes. All previous notes about the concept behind the series stand.
SPECIAL THANKS: to ocean gazer, who also happens to be the most caffeinated and cheerful minion around.
ADDITIONAL AUTHOR'S NOTES: Silly me didn't notice that the order for first season eps listed on assorted webpages doesn't quite mesh with what's on the box my DVD set came in, sooooo, though I don't think it ever matters too much, in case anyone cares, I'm using the order on the DVD set.
The earlier stories in the series can be found here
Now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field...
Genesis 3:1
Bits and Pieces 14:
The Serpent's Eye
Part 1
Prologue
Hathor was annoyed. Having been wakened and taken control of the Tau'ri military base for her new lair, she suddenly faced losing that starting point for her new empire. She should have killed the women the moment they showed the faintest hint of resistance, should have snapped Janet Fraiser's neck while Samantha Carter looked on. A faint smile curved full lips as she contemplated the look of pain that would have entered blue eyes. And when the agony had truly invaded Carter’s heart, she should have strangled the bitch and watched the light fade from her eyes. Dead, she would have been no threat.
Instead, she'd held back, been kind, even willing to give the women a place in her new empire. Now look what it had gotten her. According to the reports coming in, the blonde bitch and her cohort were busy taking back her base. A mewling Tau'ri voice brought her out of her thoughts to consider the male supplicant kneeling before her.
Tony Phillips stared up at his goddess with adoring eyes, so lost in her beauty he could barely think straight. "I'm sorry, My Goddess," he breathed, his hands dangling at his sides as he knelt before the Goa'uld. His wrists were red and abraded from his efforts to escape the shoelaces used as impromptu bonds by the escaped women. "In succumbing to their tricks, I failed you." It was his mistake that had allowed Captain Carter and the other women to escape and move against his goddess.
"Yes," Hathor confirmed, her eyes ice cold with barely contained fury. She had kept the women alive because of their beauty -- used as rewards, they would have helped keep the men in line -- and it was particularly infuriating to realize they'd turned it around and used that beauty as a weapon against her, seducing the men into making a dangerous mistake. She caressed the kneeling male's cheek, stroking lightly, then tucked her finger under his chin, drawing his head up. It would be so easy to simply break his neck, and she seriously considered it. The Tau'ri were such a fragile species.
She leaned down, eyes glowing faintly as she studied him. "Tell me something," she said very softly, her voice a threatening rumble. The other system lords would pounce if she attempted to simply leave this world without any kind of leverage. She knew her own kind. They were no gentler with one another than they were with the species they ruled. However, they could be bargained with. Perhaps with information to trade, she could regain some of her might and use it to begin rebuilding her power base. That the System Lords were desperate to destroy the Tau'ri was obvious to anyone from the reports she'd read; that they were afraid of them was obvious only to her. "I wish information."
He swallowed hard. "Wh-what about security codes." He worked security; playing in the computer was his hobby. He knew how to dig up all sorts of obscure bits of information, and would be more than happy to do so to please his goddess.
She shook her head, well aware such information would be changed the moment she left this world. She pulled him up, thrusting him toward the nearest computer. "Something else... something they wouldn't think of." A hint of a smile touched her lips. "Something to make Captain Carter bleed." Something to buy her both power and revenge again the Tau'ri witch who dared stand against her would be ideal.
His fingers danced over the keyboard, bringing up information that for the most part was of no use to her; either security information that would change or scientific information so primitive it was of no value. And then another file went by. "That," she commanded.
In tribute to Hathor, Hammond had virtually disabled the security system, giving their queen total access, so it opened where Tony would normally have been denied access.
A smile touched full lips as she scanned through the contents of the dossier. So General Hammond had plans to save his best and brightest and keep up the fight if the base was attacked. Definitely something that might have trade value. "You've done well, my child," she murmured as she mentally stored the information away.
Tony fairly glowed under the faint praise, his eyes alight with worship when she stroked his cheek and smiled down at him. "Did you enjoy the taste of your chosen, my child?" she drawled, eyes gleaming with malicious glee. He had confessed the shared kiss that had been his downfall, his head down, his voice raw with shame, but she had seen way his skin flushed and his hands trembled. She knew the power she wielded over men and women, knew how he was now bound to the Tau'ri doctor. And knew that even without this information she could have some measure of revenge. Carter had such soft eyes, eyes so easily read, eyes that would fill with pain when she lost the other woman ... particularly in light of what Tony Phillips was likely to do to Janet Fraiser.
An eager nod tipped his head up and down. "Let me bring her into your fold, My Goddess," he pleaded, his body burning with heat at the thought of the coupling Samantha Carter's attack had denied him.
"Of course." Hathor leaned close, her breath dusting his ear, the musty scent of sex and desire teasing his nostrils. "She's yours ... remember that." And then she whispered a thousand other things, all so fast and so soft he barely understood them at all, though in the days that followed, they would change his life -- and not for the better.
Weaving unsteadily on his feet, some part of him fighting the ugly suggestions, he nonetheless nodded.
"My Goddess," a young lieutenant broke in, his voice panicked. "Those who would attack your Greatness have been spotted moving toward your sarcophagus.
Eyes suddenly blazing, she straightened. That could not be allowed. She leaned close to Tony Phillips one more time, her voice an angry hiss. "Make her bleed." Then she slammed him into the wall hard enough to send him to the floor in an unconscious heap.
"Move," she snapped to the waiting lieutenant as she brushed past him. "Enter the coordinates I gave you into the gate ... while I deal with other matters."
* * * * * *
Several Months Later
The SGC was shutting down. No second chances, no argument, no turning back, and - oh, by the way - no funding for any further projects. All experimental projects were to be closed down, the results turned in to the oversight committees, the files shut down and blanked from the computers, any excess papers shredded and the shred burned. All extra-terrestrial objects were to be boxed up, carted off, and permanently locked down in government storehouses designed for just such occasions.
And what about a living, breathing extra-terrestrial artifact, Janet Fraiser found herself wondering as she sat across the desk from her commanding officer, her stomach so knotted with tension she was on the verge of throwing up. It wasn't like she didn't already have enough stress in her life. Sam's sudden exit from her backyard two nights before had seen to that. She'd tried to phone the woman only to have her calls ignored, and after making certain she was on base, tried to see her only to find she was suddenly missing from all of her usual haunts. And now this. She had to fight to contain a hysterical burst of laughter. And here she'd thought she'd finally gotten her life a little settled.
Fat chance of that. She should have remembered that calm, quiet, and orderly had never been her specialty and let it go at that.
"You can understand why we need to get the matter of Cassandra's custody squared away quickly," General Hammond said grimly, breaking in on her dark thoughts.
Janet nodded, eyes fastened on her own hand where it rested on the edge of his desk. "How much time do we have?" she asked, her voice a hoarse rasp of tension and fear.
"A week at most," the general answered. "Colonel Samuels is doing everything in his power to undermine my position, but he hasn't gotten around to what he views as the minor details yet." He was breaking the rules in giving her the heads up, but of all of the people under his command, she was, in many respects, facing the most difficult problem.
"There's no question?" she whispered.
He quashed her hopes with a cruelty borne of kindness. "None. The mission is a dead issue ... and Samuels is pressing to have Cassandra turned over to NID for further study. Once responsibility for her custody is turned over to his command, I won't have any further options."
A muscle compressed along the ridge of Janet's cheek, the only outward sign of the emotional impact of the news. No time left for debate or consideration. Either the child was hers to fight for, or she surrendered her to people who would have everything but her best interests at heart. Oh, they wouldn't dissect Cassandra -- even NID had a few limits -- but they wouldn't care for her either, wouldn't treat her like a child, but rather as an experiment to be put under glass and studied. Finding a nice couple with the appropriate security clearance to become Cassie's parents was no longer an option. In another few days, NID would take custody, and from there she would wind up as little more than a lab rat. There was only one small loophole. Legally, Hammond still had absolute discretion over her case, but that would be going away in a few days. Sign off now, and she'd have grounds for fighting it in a military court if anyone tried to take Cass away from her. Her throat constricted with sheer terror as she considered what she was letting herself in for, especially now---and possibly without Sam's help or support. She considered asking for a little time to consider it all, but time was no longer a luxury she could afford. Once the committee started dotting i's and crossing t's any time, they would lose this window of opportunity. Finally, she nodded, forcing the terror down to respond. "Okay."
Hammond pushed the necessary paperwork forward. He'd already had everything prepared, had seen to it the moment the child went to live with his CMO, half afraid even then that this moment might come. He watched her sign each of the papers in question---her signature far less steady than usual---well aware of her doubts and fears, but also confident it was going to be all right. He'd have been more worried if she hadn't been scared to death. Parenthood, no matter how it came about, wasn't something to be entered into lightly. And now she was looking at possibly having to fight the entire government top of the difficulties Cassie already had.
Finally, she shoved the stack of forms back at him and sat there, visibly shaken by the monumental task she'd just chosen for herself. "I ... uh ... I really should...." Should what? Sit there babbling like an idiot? She really had no idea what she should be doing. For the moment, the infirmary was quiet. And with all teams restricted to base, it wasn't likely to get any busier. With no ready conclusion to the sentence, she just sat there, staring at the surface of her C.O.'s desk.
"Take the rest of the day off, Doctor," he said gently, offering an encouraging smile when she looked up, appearing less the competent officer he was used to than a scared teenager handed far more responsibility than she felt ready for. He saw her draw breath to argue and held up a hand to forestall her refusal. "Nothing's going to happen today ... and your division is under control. Keep your cell phone with you," he added in deference to their situation. "But get out of here for a little while." She was likely to find herself in the middle of a fight soon enough.
She finally nodded, throwing off some of the paralytic shock with effort. "Thank you, sir." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "For everything." She looked down at her own hands. "I know you're taking a chance in doing this ... Samuels already hates your guts...." She didn't bother to finish.
Hammond shrugged practically. "I was a month from retirement when I took this command. My career was already ending." His gaze sharpened, reminding her of what she'd taken on. "You're in a far more precarious position than I am."
"I took responsibility for her," Janet said softly. "But I didn't really plan on ... any of this," she admitted a little haltingly, already working her way through her shock. She took another deep breath and let it out on a slow count. "But some days life's like that."
"Indeed it is," Hammond murmured, proud of how quickly she regained her footing. "Now, get out of here while we can spare you. We'll be burying the gate in two days, but for the moment, you're not needed here." He saw her frown, worried about leaving the base now that she was mentally tracking again. "Consider it an order, Doctor." She'd been working hellacious hours for weeks, and the strain was starting to show ... or maybe it was something else, he thought as he assessed the shadows under her eyes, uncertain simple overwork would have caused what he was seeing. Of course, she was smart enough that she'd probably been worrying about the child's future since everything started to go wrong. Though as he looked more closely, he wasn't as confident as he would have liked that was the sole cause of what he was seeing.
She drew breath, still ready to argue, only to change her mind abruptly. "Thank you, sir," she said again, resolved to get the hell out of there once she took care of one thing.
Hammond looked pointedly at his watch, then nodded toward the door. "Go," he said not unkindly. "I've got several calls to make ... and then a meeting with Colonel O'Neill." His tone made it clear that he wasn't looking forward to any of it; not one more futile, last ditch stand to try and save the project, and not O'Neill's anger and disapproval because he couldn't do the impossible and didn't consider mutiny a viable option.
Fraiser still had enough of a sense of humor to offer a sympathetic smile. "For what it's worth, good luck, sir."
"You too, Doctor," he sighed, leaning back in his chair and watching as she slipped out. It was a hell of a thing, he thought as he considered the situation. She, and others who'd done a job very few people could, for lousy pay and scant thanks, were now being forced to fear for their careers ... and in her case, for a child who'd become her family. He shook his head sadly, feeling the guilt of being unable to save it all settle on his shoulders. And that was just the obvious price. God only knew what it might cost the entire planet down the line somewhere.
Finally, he shook off his grim musings and leaned forward, reaching for the phone as he readied himself for another round of fruitless arguments with politicians too short-sighted to see what their penny-pinching, partisan politics threatened to do to the nation ... hell, the whole damn world.
* * * * * *
"Hi," Janet said baldly as she entered Sam's lab, not giving her a chance to run away by sending word she was looking for her, sick that the only way to do this was by some kind of surprise attack.
Sam looked up, intelligent blue eyes widening in sheer panic for the briefest second before her expression closed down and the emotional wall went up. "Doctor Fraiser," she said formally, her stomach coiling with hurt at the way Janet flinched as though struck. It's for the best, she reminded herself as she clamped down on the urge to apologize and beg for forgiveness for as long as it took to wash away the pained look on the other woman's face.
The muscles along the line of Janet's jaw compressed and her cheek twitched. Her knuckles were white, Sam noted, where her hands were twined together in front of her.
"Can we just talk, please?" the doctor rasped, the hurt in her voice tearing at Sam's resolve in all the ways she'd known it would, leaving her to wonder how she'd managed to avoid the truth as long as she had. She supposed it was the same thing that had driven her to avoid this meeting -- sheer terror.
It took all of Sam's strength to keep her voice cool and step carefully around Janet to reach for something---she wasn't entirely certain what, but it made for a decent excuse to look anywhere but at the woman whose mere presence had such a shattering effect on her. "I'm afraid I don't really have much time right now." She felt rather than saw the flinch those coldly uttered words caused. "With everything that's going on, I've got a lot of work to do."
"I ... see..." Janet breathed and was silent for a long moment as she fought the urge to grab Sam and shake in an effort to get some kind of response.
Sam didn't have to turn and look to sense the hurt and anger rolling over the other woman. She swallowed hard, grateful she was facing the other direction, afraid that if she had to face her friend, her real feelings would be all too obvious. "Look, I really don't have time for this right now," she said as firmly as she was able, concentrating on the artifact in her hand; only minutes before she could have described every last detail of the analysis she'd done on the damn thing and at that moment, she couldn't even remember the Goa’uld word Teal’c had used for it, much less how it worked or what it did.
"I just wanted to talk to you about Cass ... with everything closing down ... there are issues...." Janet tried again, silently willing Sam to turn and face their problems like an adult, unable to believe that one drunken moment could undo everything they’d been through and all the promises that had been made.
Sam's hand clenched until the sharp edges of the alien artifact were cutting into her fingers and palm. Cass, God. She hadn't let herself think about the child and what her screw-up would mean for the girl. How the hell was she supposed to deal with everything now that the project was probably shutting down? She owed Cassie and Janet both, but had no idea how to follow through under the circumstances. "I ... uh...." She almost lost the cool tone as her voice bobbled faintly, but she got it under control again. "I think it's best if I arrange to see her while you're on duty ... so that she's got one of us with her during as much of the day as possible. With everything so confused, that might help her feel a little more stable."
The obvious evasion was met by a long moment of total silence, and then Janet's voice, angry and bitter, hit her like actual blows. "Don't bother lying, Sam. You don't do it worth a damn." Another moment's silence followed, broken only by the rhythmic sound of carefully controlled breathing. "I'm sorry for what happened," the doctor said at last, her tone flaying Carter alive, not with her anger, but with her hurt, her pain like knives on flesh. "I know I blew it, but--" The doctor cut herself off with an angry growl. "Screw it. I don't have time for this."
Teeth digging into her lower lip, Sam fought the urge to turn and beg forgiveness for even thinking of pulling away.
Janet turned to leave, then couldn’t, her temper too on edge to let her leave it like that. "Let me give you a piece of advice," she added, the bitterness back as she realized that whatever they’d had it was over now. "In the future, before you go making promises, make sure they're ones you can keep ... and maybe, just maybe, you could try a little forgiveness while you're at it."
It was too much for Sam to bear as she realized that Janet felt to blame for what had happened. "Janet," Sam whispered as she spun, but it was too late. The other woman was already gone. Fighting the urge to hurl the object in her hand, she set it aside with extra care, then slowly sank down onto a nearby stool, her legs shaky. "Get it under control, Carter," she muttered to herself, even as she struggled against the urge to go after her friend, to explain to her, or at least make excuses---whatever would work to put things right between them. Except even the slightest thought along those lines caused a surge of hope and want that only served to point out how dangerous the impulse was.
With the walls of denial and control that she'd used to protect herself so thoroughly shattered, Sam was spinning, her equilibrium thoroughly gone, and she had no idea how to get it back. Until she figured out a way to do that, the only thing she could think to do was stay as far away from Janet Fraiser as was humanly possible. No matter how much it might hurt, it was the best thing for both of them.
She ran a hand over her hair as she forced down any fantasies of following Janet through sheer force of will. It wouldn't gain either of them anything, not when emotions were so raw. Maybe later, when things had calmed, they could talk, work out what to do for Cass's sake, but for now, it just wasn't doable. Suddenly exhausted, Sam stepped back over to her computer, returning to the task she'd set for herself, concentrating on that and not the betrayal in the other woman's voice. She had a job to do and that took precedence over any other concerns. Despite her determination, it was a constant battle to keep her mind on the subject. So much so that when Colonel O'Neill called a meeting of SG-1 a short time later, it was a curious relief to have something so overwhelming to worry about.
After some discussion, knowing the gate was due to be closed and buried shortly, and with every reason to believe a Goa'uld mothership was headed for Earth, the team was going to gate to the coordinates Daniel had for the attack fleet from the other universe, and try to stop their own world from being destroyed . If they were right, and succeeded, Earth would be saved. If they were wrong, the best they could hope for was a court martial, the worst, failure and death a long way from home. It wasn't exactly a new possibility for any of them.
As she made the necessary plans, Sam found a moment to write two final emails, setting them to send on a time delay before hurrying to join her teammates for the last minute preparations.
* * * * * *