(no subject)
Title: I‘m lost without you
Author: Me, CherylMcMinorrr
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: PG?
Part: 3/4
Genre: Angst, but it's getting better...
Summary: What happens when the life you’ve come to know gets shook up in every possible way? Sometimes you need to be on the verge of losing it all before you realise what you had. (Sorry, I fail at writing summaries)
Disclaimer: This hasn’t happened and I hope it doesn’t. Title belongs to Blink 182.
A/N: Shit. I just realised I accidentally replied to like 4 comments on the last chapter off of my other account CherylFails, that’s still me, some randomer didn’t just randomly reply to you.
A/N (2): SORRY, I FEEL THIS IS TOO SHORT. I also feel that it sounds kind of fillerish, my writing definitely deteriorates as I get further and further into something, that and if I'm not in the right frame of mind. I’ve not currently finished part four, so this is my last remaining finished part, I’ll be finishing it tomorrow as college is a life-ruiner and I have loads of work to do. **Edit: I'm a douche who put "two" instead of "too" even though I obsess over grammar, I've changed it now.
Dedications: Anyone who commented on or bothered to read the last part, thank you.
After the visiting hour was up, Rian actually managed to convince Alex to take a break from the hospital, just until the next visiting hour that afternoon, when they’d both return. Once they were at Rian’s he made sure the slightly older boy showered, while he cooked him food, just to ensure he ate. He wasn’t sure Alex had been doing that. He willed for Jack to wake up soon even more than he had already doing, because seriously he could see his best friend and band mate falling apart at his feet if his younger band mate didn’t get better. And he knew he probably wouldn’t be able to stop Alex from falling into the dark pit of depression that was already threatening to suffice. Alex smiled meekly at him once he returned, his hair dripping wet and curling slightly. He pulled a face at the simple pasta dish Rian set in front of him. “Eat.” he instructed and Alex began picking at the food, managing about half of it. And that took him a good forty five minutes. Afterwards he turned the TV on and flicked through the channels, making sure to avoid anything to do with hospitals. Within five minutes of watching, Alex began pacing his living room and checking the clock every five seconds, he was already sick of these generic things people who’s life was going normally would usually do. He sighed a lot, his pace getting faster and faster as his thoughts were becoming more and more frantic. Rian watched him carefully, becoming more and more agitated with his behaviour, but not even attempting to intervene.
He’d been pacing for about twenty minutes before he decided he’d had enough, there was nothing stopping him from going to the hospital right now, sure there’d probably be no difference with Jack, but he‘d rather be there than here. And if there was any difference, at least he’d be there. “Look! I’m going back to the hospital! I can’t do this any more!” He said urgently, throwing his arms into the air. Rian sighed defeatedly, but let him go because he couldn’t really stop him, he just thought that being in that claustrophobic hospital room 24/7 couldn’t be very good for his friend and that a change of environment would be best, especially for Alex who usually despised staying in one place for too long. He’d go back to the hospital this evening with Zack and check on him, that’s all he could do.
When Alex arrived back a the ward he noticed there was quite a commotion about Jack’s room. He felt his heart beat quickening and his breathing becoming panicked, instantly fearing the worst, but he kept himself headed to the room, feet sliding along the shiny white floor. He pushed past the doctor and nurse who were heading out of the room and was met by Jack’s mom, who’s arms were flapping up and down at him like a mad woman. “Alex! Dear! You missed it! Oh my gosh! I was holding his hand and talking to him and his fingers actually twitched!” She grinned at Alex and he ran up and hugged her, smiling properly for the first time in what felt like forever. He was only annoyed with himself for missing it. “They tried telling me it’s just the machinery, but I don’t think so, Alex. They said his heart beat’s stronger too!” Alex grinned more, before practically running to the bed and stealing Jack’s mom’s seat. He laced his fingers with Jack’s gingerly and, like always, pecked a kiss to his cheek. “He’s getting better!” “Baby steps.” the nurse informed them, heading back into the room and writing on Jack’s chart. Alex stroked Jack’s hand with his thumb. “Wake up, Jacky?” he asked, softly. Jack’s mom sat herself on the seat at the other side of Jack’s bed and watched her son, just as Alex was, both people lost in their own thoughts about the man in the bed.
***
Later than evening Alex found himself alone and pacing up and down Jack’s hospital room. He found himself pacing a lot these days, agitatedly waiting for something. He knew what, but he didn’t know if or when he’d get it and he was terrified. Part of him wanted to jump into his car and just drive for a while, without any specific destination in mind and just escape his problems for a short while, like how he’d done when he was younger. The other part of him hated this part of him for wanting to run away from it all. He knew he couldn’t do that to Jack and Evie anyway, but his head was a mess, a mass of contradictions and he hated feeling like he was out of control of his own life.
He had begun to miss Evie, having a child to care for pulled him out of his negative thought processes and always managed to drag him back down to Earth, now he didn’t have that his brain was working overtime. He wished Jack would just wake up, but there had been no other improvements with him. He contemplated whether he should go home to attempt to sleep or just stay in the hospital room, it’d been so long since he’d got a decent sleep he was certain his body was just used to functioning without it. He sat himself softly on Jack’s mattress, at the side of the bed with less machinery and wires and played with the younger boy’s hair almost subconsciously. He stared at the TV numbly, without ever acknowledging what was on for a while before somehow managing to fall asleep in Jack’s hospital bed.
When he awoke it took him a while to realise where he was, although the brightened lights and walls should have given it away straight away, when he did, more importantly it took him a long while to realise what had awoken him. The body he was pressed up against was moving. Jack. And just like that he jumped out of the bed, finally processing what was going on and seeing convulsions taking over his lover’s body. He frantically pressed at the red button by the bed, the one to call the doctor in case of emergency. By the time three people burst through the door, Alex thought he was about to start hyperventilating. One of the three doctor’s took him over the to the side of the room to attempt to relax him, which just caused him to fight against the man in an attempt to get back to Jack’s bedside. Another doctor overlooked to boy on the bed, while the third pressed buttons on the machine which was causing the “beep beep” noise and removed various wires and tubes. Alex panted heavily and his eyes scanned what the doctor was doing to his beloved, all the while feeling uneasy around the doctor who was trying to sooth him. How could he clam him down while wearing one of those scary medical white coats (which match the hospital interior, clearly) with all sorts of drugs and needles and contraptions hidden in the pockets? He didn’t know. Soon the two doctors moved away from the younger man and the third doctor went to join them. Alex’s mind shot into overdrive, until he looked back at the bed and saw that Jack’s body was moving, but not in the big heaving convulsions he’d just witnessed, more like he was stirring from sleep.
Realisation set in and he turned to grin at the doctors in a thank you, but noticed two of them had already left the room. The third, whom had been altering Jack’s machinery spoke kindly. “I’ll be back in about five minutes to check his vital signs and memory, do you think you can keep him from falling asleep until then? He might wake up feeling like he’s not slept for a few weeks.” Alex could relate to that feeling. He nodded at the doctor and thanked him quickly, before he rushed to Jack’s side. He took his hand in his own, brought it up to his lips and kissed it. Jack’s dark brown eyes flicked open and a croaky “Lex?” fell from his lips. “Shh. I’m here. Oh my God! Jack!” Alex smiled, diving at the younger boy and wrapping his arms around him. “I was so worried.” He planted a trail of sloppy kisses to the boy’s face. “I love you so fucking much!” He protested, pressing their lips together. Jack’s lips were warm and life filled, unlike how they’d been when he was unconscious. Tears began to pour from Alex’s eyes. “Hey now baby, don’t cry.” Jack croaked and brought his hand up to wipe away the tears.
Author: Me, CherylMcMinorrr
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: PG?
Part: 3/4
Genre: Angst, but it's getting better...
Summary: What happens when the life you’ve come to know gets shook up in every possible way? Sometimes you need to be on the verge of losing it all before you realise what you had. (Sorry, I fail at writing summaries)
Disclaimer: This hasn’t happened and I hope it doesn’t. Title belongs to Blink 182.
A/N: Shit. I just realised I accidentally replied to like 4 comments on the last chapter off of my other account CherylFails, that’s still me, some randomer didn’t just randomly reply to you.
A/N (2): SORRY, I FEEL THIS IS TOO SHORT. I also feel that it sounds kind of fillerish, my writing definitely deteriorates as I get further and further into something, that and if I'm not in the right frame of mind. I’ve not currently finished part four, so this is my last remaining finished part, I’ll be finishing it tomorrow as college is a life-ruiner and I have loads of work to do. **Edit: I'm a douche who put "two" instead of "too" even though I obsess over grammar, I've changed it now.
Dedications: Anyone who commented on or bothered to read the last part, thank you.
After the visiting hour was up, Rian actually managed to convince Alex to take a break from the hospital, just until the next visiting hour that afternoon, when they’d both return. Once they were at Rian’s he made sure the slightly older boy showered, while he cooked him food, just to ensure he ate. He wasn’t sure Alex had been doing that. He willed for Jack to wake up soon even more than he had already doing, because seriously he could see his best friend and band mate falling apart at his feet if his younger band mate didn’t get better. And he knew he probably wouldn’t be able to stop Alex from falling into the dark pit of depression that was already threatening to suffice. Alex smiled meekly at him once he returned, his hair dripping wet and curling slightly. He pulled a face at the simple pasta dish Rian set in front of him. “Eat.” he instructed and Alex began picking at the food, managing about half of it. And that took him a good forty five minutes. Afterwards he turned the TV on and flicked through the channels, making sure to avoid anything to do with hospitals. Within five minutes of watching, Alex began pacing his living room and checking the clock every five seconds, he was already sick of these generic things people who’s life was going normally would usually do. He sighed a lot, his pace getting faster and faster as his thoughts were becoming more and more frantic. Rian watched him carefully, becoming more and more agitated with his behaviour, but not even attempting to intervene.
He’d been pacing for about twenty minutes before he decided he’d had enough, there was nothing stopping him from going to the hospital right now, sure there’d probably be no difference with Jack, but he‘d rather be there than here. And if there was any difference, at least he’d be there. “Look! I’m going back to the hospital! I can’t do this any more!” He said urgently, throwing his arms into the air. Rian sighed defeatedly, but let him go because he couldn’t really stop him, he just thought that being in that claustrophobic hospital room 24/7 couldn’t be very good for his friend and that a change of environment would be best, especially for Alex who usually despised staying in one place for too long. He’d go back to the hospital this evening with Zack and check on him, that’s all he could do.
When Alex arrived back a the ward he noticed there was quite a commotion about Jack’s room. He felt his heart beat quickening and his breathing becoming panicked, instantly fearing the worst, but he kept himself headed to the room, feet sliding along the shiny white floor. He pushed past the doctor and nurse who were heading out of the room and was met by Jack’s mom, who’s arms were flapping up and down at him like a mad woman. “Alex! Dear! You missed it! Oh my gosh! I was holding his hand and talking to him and his fingers actually twitched!” She grinned at Alex and he ran up and hugged her, smiling properly for the first time in what felt like forever. He was only annoyed with himself for missing it. “They tried telling me it’s just the machinery, but I don’t think so, Alex. They said his heart beat’s stronger too!” Alex grinned more, before practically running to the bed and stealing Jack’s mom’s seat. He laced his fingers with Jack’s gingerly and, like always, pecked a kiss to his cheek. “He’s getting better!” “Baby steps.” the nurse informed them, heading back into the room and writing on Jack’s chart. Alex stroked Jack’s hand with his thumb. “Wake up, Jacky?” he asked, softly. Jack’s mom sat herself on the seat at the other side of Jack’s bed and watched her son, just as Alex was, both people lost in their own thoughts about the man in the bed.
***
Later than evening Alex found himself alone and pacing up and down Jack’s hospital room. He found himself pacing a lot these days, agitatedly waiting for something. He knew what, but he didn’t know if or when he’d get it and he was terrified. Part of him wanted to jump into his car and just drive for a while, without any specific destination in mind and just escape his problems for a short while, like how he’d done when he was younger. The other part of him hated this part of him for wanting to run away from it all. He knew he couldn’t do that to Jack and Evie anyway, but his head was a mess, a mass of contradictions and he hated feeling like he was out of control of his own life.
He had begun to miss Evie, having a child to care for pulled him out of his negative thought processes and always managed to drag him back down to Earth, now he didn’t have that his brain was working overtime. He wished Jack would just wake up, but there had been no other improvements with him. He contemplated whether he should go home to attempt to sleep or just stay in the hospital room, it’d been so long since he’d got a decent sleep he was certain his body was just used to functioning without it. He sat himself softly on Jack’s mattress, at the side of the bed with less machinery and wires and played with the younger boy’s hair almost subconsciously. He stared at the TV numbly, without ever acknowledging what was on for a while before somehow managing to fall asleep in Jack’s hospital bed.
When he awoke it took him a while to realise where he was, although the brightened lights and walls should have given it away straight away, when he did, more importantly it took him a long while to realise what had awoken him. The body he was pressed up against was moving. Jack. And just like that he jumped out of the bed, finally processing what was going on and seeing convulsions taking over his lover’s body. He frantically pressed at the red button by the bed, the one to call the doctor in case of emergency. By the time three people burst through the door, Alex thought he was about to start hyperventilating. One of the three doctor’s took him over the to the side of the room to attempt to relax him, which just caused him to fight against the man in an attempt to get back to Jack’s bedside. Another doctor overlooked to boy on the bed, while the third pressed buttons on the machine which was causing the “beep beep” noise and removed various wires and tubes. Alex panted heavily and his eyes scanned what the doctor was doing to his beloved, all the while feeling uneasy around the doctor who was trying to sooth him. How could he clam him down while wearing one of those scary medical white coats (which match the hospital interior, clearly) with all sorts of drugs and needles and contraptions hidden in the pockets? He didn’t know. Soon the two doctors moved away from the younger man and the third doctor went to join them. Alex’s mind shot into overdrive, until he looked back at the bed and saw that Jack’s body was moving, but not in the big heaving convulsions he’d just witnessed, more like he was stirring from sleep.
Realisation set in and he turned to grin at the doctors in a thank you, but noticed two of them had already left the room. The third, whom had been altering Jack’s machinery spoke kindly. “I’ll be back in about five minutes to check his vital signs and memory, do you think you can keep him from falling asleep until then? He might wake up feeling like he’s not slept for a few weeks.” Alex could relate to that feeling. He nodded at the doctor and thanked him quickly, before he rushed to Jack’s side. He took his hand in his own, brought it up to his lips and kissed it. Jack’s dark brown eyes flicked open and a croaky “Lex?” fell from his lips. “Shh. I’m here. Oh my God! Jack!” Alex smiled, diving at the younger boy and wrapping his arms around him. “I was so worried.” He planted a trail of sloppy kisses to the boy’s face. “I love you so fucking much!” He protested, pressing their lips together. Jack’s lips were warm and life filled, unlike how they’d been when he was unconscious. Tears began to pour from Alex’s eyes. “Hey now baby, don’t cry.” Jack croaked and brought his hand up to wipe away the tears.