The Rumour (Chapter 6)
Title: The Rumour (6/?)
Author: badenoughforyou
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: PG-13
Summary:Jack has fallen inevitably head over heels for his best friend. Truth is, Alex doesn't feel the same way until the night one "staged" kiss changes that all forever
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone. Title cred goes to You Me at Six
A/N: I updated this, holy shit.
Masterpost
"So, how's life been?" Jack asked as he sat across from the boy he desired most, acting as if he were indifferent. It was difficult to do, especially after they'd slept together and the whole cereal incident...
Alex looked back at him, taking a sip of his coffee to bide some time to make up a legitimate answer. He couldn't just say "Oh, it's been about as good as living without you can be. I'm such a dumbass for leaving and thinking I was making the right decision, when really I loved you more than anything on this planet. And I just gave you up and if you still have any respect for me, I'm amazed. But really, can we just forget about that and cuddle until we just die because I feel like shit right now."
No, he wasn't about to utter any of that. Not to the boy who was the one who should be broken. Alex was the one who'd made the mistake and he didn't want Jack to feel guilty. No, he could never do that.
"It's been... life. I've got a solo thing going on. I just play at bars and stuff like that. Acoustic stuff." Alex said, relishing the scorching coffee that distracted him with pain.
Jack nodded and looked down at his hands.
"That's good for you... to keep music in your life." Jack said, offering a ghost of a smile. Alex's heart ached more than it ever had. It was now an intense throb. Almost unbearable. He bit his lip and nodded in agreement.
"I couldn't just get rid of it entirely. I couldn't live with myself if I'd done something that dumb." Alex said and felt tense as he realized how that sounded. He cursed internally as Jack's expression changed back to painfully neutral. He missed Jack's emotions, even if they were bad. At least he would know that he was still alive and not just a shell of a person.
"I can't do this anymore..." Jack said, pushing out his chair and standing up, running his hand through his hair before quickly going to his room.
"Wait, Jack! Please, I didn't mean..." Alex started, but cringed at the sound of a slamming door. He couldn't believe himself. After all this time, he'd completely blown it. He felt so foolish to think he'd ever had a second chance. No, he didn't deserve it. Something like that didn't deserve second chances.
He walked over to the couch, but didn't quite make it. He sat down heavily on the floor, burying his face in his knees. After a moment of wallowing in self-pity, he looked up. Almost concealed by the couch, a DVD poked out from underneath the cushions. He pulled it out and couldn't help but grin.
He popped in the movie and wished so badly Jack would hear it and come out and cuddle with him, but he knew that probably wouldn't happen. A mere movie couldn't fix it.
As Alex watched the movie, he felt something. He felt a connection to the movie he'd only ever really liked because of Jack's obvious love for it.
Kevin had made the wish of his family disappearing and he got it. It was, of course, not a true act of magic, but it was just the fact that it happened that made it coincidental. And that scared Alex. That night two years ago, he had wished to just get away from everything Jack... but was it a coincidence that he got what he wanted? Maybe at the beginning he was relieved, but after a while, just like Kevin, he felt an ache that could only be cured by the thing he'd wished away.
He clutched a pillow to his chest, feeling shaky as he realized he was screwed. He wasn't going to get Jack back. Jack had Tony now and why the fuck would he forgive him anyway? Alex wouldn't even forgive himself.
He turned off the movie, feeling a frown tug at his lips as he realized that it didn't lure Jack from his room. The apartment was eerily silent.
Suddenly a click.
Alex jumped off the couch as the door opened and light streamed in. His eyes widened. Tony walked in, flicking on the lights and giving Alex a small, but confused smile.
"Why were you in the dark?" He asked, looking around, probably for Jack.
"Watching a movie." Alex answered quickly.
Tony nodded and sat down on the couch. Alex could have cut the tension with a knife.
"Where's Jack?" Tony asked nonchalantly, but a hint of worry tinged his voice. "Um, I called earlier and he never answered. Is he okay?" He asked, looking more worried.
"I think he's coming down with something. He hasn't been feeling well." Alex lied. Tony nodded and looked at the ground.
"I... feel dumb for coming and checking on him, but I just worry about him sometimes." Tony said, biting his lip. Alex could sense there was more behind his words.
"He's Jack. He's pretty good at bouncing back... He's resilient." Alex said, thinking of the old Jack. Maybe that wasn't him now. Tony looked at him with eyes that conveyed such sadness. That look contradicted everything Alex knew to be true. Or at least what he thought was true.
"How long have you been friends with him?" Tony asked. Alex couldn't even remember.
"A while." Alex said simply. "I've known him since like... forever." He added. It sure did seem like forever. Tony just kept looking at him, like he was supposed to be worried or something. "What?" Alex finally asked.
"I'm sorry... I just assumed... you knew about what happened." Tony said, looking down at his hands. Alex felt suddenly cold and uneasy at the ominous tone of his words.
"W-what?" Alex asked, feeling his voice quivering. Tony looked around, like he was trying to find a reason to not tell him, but when his eyes settled on Alex again, he saw the fear and how obvious it was that he cared about Jack.
"Well, it was about a year ago, I think... He tried to..." Tony swallowed a little. He didn't want to say it out loud. "I guess he'd been self harming for a while... and he cut too deep one day... Luckily not deep enough though." He said, not wanting to meet Alex's eyes.
Alex couldn't believe it. He truly could not wrap his head around Jack taking a blade to his skin... Jack slicing himself... and then it all clicked. Sweet, wonderful, perfect Jack... what had he done to him? Alex felt sick all of the sudden. He stood up quickly, starting towards the bathroom, but saw Jack first. He was standing in the hallway, obviously aware of the conversation.
"I think you should leave." Jack said, his voice and expression dead. Alex's mouth went dry. He floundered about like a beached whale for words, but nothing came up. "Get out."
Alex didn't know what else to do. So he left.