i need a recharge from the smell of home. i need to go build something. with saws and hammers. run through the woods. change my oil. get grimy. i need real work. wrestle with the animals. attainable dirt. strength in capability. sweating. muscling. the balance of a worked body. i cant philosophize my fight or flight away.

being a receptor
entangled

nothing is so useful as your silence

of course then again nothing is more heavy than having to be there for it
i'm tired of supposed meaning. i've never meant anything.
i wanna be able to lay my head down and think nothing of it. theres no agenda. there will be nothing more than now.

absolute retraction.

clouded thickness; sticky
continuation of the Most Fucked Up In An Disorienting But Entertaining Way Week Ever.
i dont even know whether to bother with the budget hearing for philosophy since its been declared dead. and a club picture? we should just enter a picture of mullet-hawk.

I've stumbled on the side of twelve misty mountains. waiting in the wings. comically predictable. fair enough though, ive had my share. let it happen. let it all happen. I've been out in front of a dozen dead oceans. ive been bluntly asked for it not to be him, but it already was him, and it was also some others. let it happen, because the only way ( Read more... )

this picture of my dogs mouth was denied as my personal icon for the SCT ticketing system because of 'inappropriate content ( Read more... )

apparently, in lieu of sleep, i missed the best bio lab ever today. it seems all we did was sit in a field and draw pictures of bugs we saw crawling around. now thats my kind of biology ( Read more... )

sheryl describes her 'darling apartment' in the historic district of florence: '5th floor walk up with 15 foot ceilings, and the place must be 300 years old.' i wish i could just fully realize that that sort of thing is a feasible option. but i feel tied, financially and otherwise.

a post a la not-you, and not-him, although youll think otherwise ( Read more... )

i need to pay more goddamned attention to things

lack of sleep; lackadaisical
functioning well in my 30th hour.
i need to get a passport picture made.

the seduction of creation is consuming. i just want to sew and crochet. and NOT read.

( ... )