Fic: Uncomfortable
Title: Uncomfortable
Fandom: The Avengers (2012).
Genre: Humor.
Pairings: Thor/Loki. Clint/Natasha.
Rating: PG-13.
Word Count: 701.
Warnings: Pseudo-incest.
Note: For this prompt on norsekink: "Clint finds the kink meme and is both horrified and fascinated. Of course, Loki just has to put his two cents in as well... Bonus points if other SHEILD members write fills too"
Summary: Clint is linked to the kink meme. Shock of all shocks, Loki seeing it leads him to more trauma.
~
Clint wasn't sure who sent him the link--although he'd guess it was Tony or Natasha, based on its content.
Who else would send him to something called a "kink meme." One that revolved around them, no less. How did people even think of these?
He also wasn't sure what kept him scrolling other than terrified curiosity. Could he... No. Impossible. He studied the prompt closer.
Clint suddenly had that itch of danger--grabbing for his gun at its immediacy. He turned slightly and Loki appeared next to him on the opposite side, laughing. "Really? You and the beast? Oh, my...would that fit?"
"Nothing as bad as the ones about you and your brother," Clint replied happily, although his gun was trained on Loki.
The god of mischief grinned, "Thor and I?"
Clint searched for a large chunk of prompts relating to the two gods triumphantly. His gun never moved as he did--not that Loki paid it any mind as he leaned over Clint's shoulder.
"Thor!" Loki called, still reading in rapt fascination. As his brother entered the room, he tapped the screen. "These Midgardians certainly have imagination. We must try this one."
Clint grimaced, "You've got to be kidding me."
Thor was leaning in on the side opposite Loki, effectively trapping Clint between them as they read prompt after prompt--as well as some far too graphic fills, at least for his taste. "Oh, I like this one. What do you think, brother?"
Loki frowned, "Even I am not that limber."
Clint glanced sideways at one and then the other. "You guys are serious?"
Two pairs of eyes--Thor's confused and Loki's smug--turned to him.
"You two?" Looking to Loki first, he set his jaw and changed his focus to his teammate, "But...he's evil." He said it in such a stage whisper, with a hand next to his mouth as if to shield it, it was sure to bother Loki. Good.
Thor slapped him on the back, smiling simply, "Nonsense! Loki has made mistakes. He was...misguided, but he is not evil. He is my brother."
"Ew." Clint tried to propel the chair backwards between them to be out of their way, but Loki stayed it.
"Agent Barton, we haven't made you...uncomfortable, have we?" The glint in his eye was enough for Clint to know that there was no right answer for that.
"Yes," he gritted out. There was no use lying here--not to Loki, of all people.. Well, godlike beings.
Loki grinned wickedly before standing up straight, drawing Thor's attention, and proceeding to pout, eyes already glistening with unshed tears, "Are you ashamed of me?"
The god of thunder was immediately moving them away from Clint enough to place his hands on Loki's shoulders reassuringly, "Never, brother."
Clint wished he hadn't been staring because Loki was drawing Thor in and... Yup. There were two gods making out in front of him--with wandering hands.
Loki groaned into Thor's mouth and the god of thunder was pulling his brother back towards his room eagerly. Loki spared a wink to Clint before they were out of sight.
Clint sighed and found himself turning back to the computer screen. He immediately cringed and closed the tab.
He then had to resign himself to the fact that his room was the one next to Thor's. Good thing Stark was big on soundproofing.
It turned out that soundproofing was still not enough when you were dealing with Norse gods--one of whom was very likely trying to be as loud as possible.
He imagined how loud it must actually be and shuddered, shoving a pillow over his head. His eyes squeezed shut. Natasha laughed, if it could be called that, and said drily, "If Loki can't walk, he probably can't cause more trouble."
"They're gods, Tasha," Clint moaned from his pillow. "Gods."
She was silent for a moment, "Sounds like you guys saw that link I sent you."
One eye popped open, "It was you?"
"I found Coulson on it fixing facts on Captain America prompts." Her lips quirked upwards as Clint attempted to smother himself with his pillow.
Meanwhile, Loki actually tired Thor out. For a minute.