The Hunter and the Hunted - Chapter One
Thunderous hooves were at their back, there was the blast of a horn, and then arrows split the air. They ran side by side, exhaustion weighing their limbs down, until an arrow sunk into flesh and one fell. There was only time enough for shouts of “I love you” and “I’ll find you” before he was set upon and she ran away…
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Two bedraggled figures were huddled around a small fire. It wasn’t often they risked starting one, the smoke and flames would draw unwanted attention. But they found an alcove in a cliff side that would help to hide it… and they were cold, bitterly cold.
Dean and Castiel couldn’t tell how long they had been in purgatory. There was no night and day here. There was pitch black darkness and a lightening of the sky that washed the world into a grey wasteland. But there was no regularity to it. The darkness gave way apparently when it felt like it. Sometimes lasting hours, sometimes lasting days… but the passing of time was impossible to gauge. Dean eventually stopped trying to keep track of it and Castiel had never bothered in the first place.
Of course it was hard to keep track of anything really when you were constantly alert to the slightest movement in the depths of the trees. More often than not it meant you would be running for your life moments later. Or fighting… they had fashioned rudimentary weapons from sharp rocks and branches. It was not nearly enough to tackle half of purgatory’s denizens, and so running was usually the first option. It left them tired, this running and constant watchfulness. Purgatory seemed to wear on them, drag them down… but they kept on going.
“We can’t keep going like this man”. Dean held his jacket tightly around himself, the waver in his voice giving away how cold he felt. “We have to come up with a plan or something”.
Dean was sure that Sam was working tirelessly to get them out. He could imagine his brother hunched over his laptop in the small hours, surrounded by piles of books and fuelled by coffee. But time was screwy between hell and earth; it could be the same here. They could have been running for years while Sam turned a few pages. So Dean didn’t want to bet on one horse. If there was something to done from their end, he would rather be doing it. An eternity of running didn’t really appeal.
“I’m not sure what…” Castiel trailed off, his eyes were absorbed entirely by the dance of the flames in front him. He also held his arms tightly around himself, but the former angel was unlucky enough to have been trapped in purgatory wearing only a t-shirt.
“Dude, do you want my jacket? I swear you’re turning blue”.
“I’m fine”. Castiel watched the fire intently.
Dean turned his gaze outward at the trees momentarily. Thankfully it was light and any creatures would be easily seen. Then he looked back at Castiel, wondering how to phrase his question, wanting to tread lightly. “Hey, um… you kinda had purgatory in you that time, the souls anyway, did it give you any ideas on how we could get out?”
Castiel raised his wide eyes to Dean then. A haunted look saying he was recalling that time, which is why Dean didn’t want to mention it. “I… I learned nothing good from them”. His eyes flicked back to the fire. The former angel seemed deep in thought before he opened his mouth again. “But… there must be an end to purgatory, a place where doors can open. Heaven and hell are finite, as is earth itself; this place must have its boundaries too. There are places where realms meet, places of weakness between them, the devil’s gate, the cage…” The more Castiel went on the more excited he seemed to be about the possibility of getting out. “If we reach the boundary maybe we can find a door, it’s been done before… Eleanor”. Castiel said her name like it physically hurt to do so, his excitement stalled and he fell silent, eyes lost in the fire again.
“That’s good, if you think there’s a real chance we can get out then lets go with it”. Dean ignored the mention of Eleanor Visyak. They had enough to be depressed about without the reminder of Castiel’s actions bringing them down. And the possibility of escape had just presented itself. Finally they could do something, and this was reason for celebration in Dean’s eyes. “Ok, so we just pick a direction and walk?”
The question seemed to bring Castiel out of his dark thoughts. “As far as I can gather, that’s all we can do”.
“Great, sounds like a plan”.
Castiel said nothing in return. A companionable silence fell between the two… they had known each other too long and been through too much for silences to be awkward. Still, Dean felt the need to talk, to keep his mind off the cold and the terror this place held.
“Hey Cas, first thing I’m going to do when we get out of here is eat a burger this big”. He raised his hands to an impossible height. “And pie… God, what I would do for a piece of pie right now”.
“I don’t think my father heard you. And if he did I don’t think he would provide any baked goods”.
“Well if he knew what I’d do for some baked goods he might change his mind… So what are you going to do when we land topside?”
Castiel looked thoughtful for a moment and then wiped at the dirt on his arms. “I will get in a hot shower and never get out again”.
“Good choice dude. I’ll jump in the shower right after my burger… and after you’ve done with it, obviously”. Dean coughed awkwardly.
“Keeping clean was never a problem when I was an angel. Being human is so messy…” Castiel sighed and stared into the fire. “Everything about being human is so messy. Killing these purgatory beasts, it’s all hacking and blood and bone. If I was an angel I could burn them away with a touch. If I was an an-”
“Yeah, and if I was the tooth fairy… Quit talking like that Cas”. Dean was quick to derail Castiel’s train of thought. They had been down that track before and Dean knew the look on the fallen angel’s face. He was only torturing himself. It seemed his favourite pastime of late.
“But you never were the tooth fairy, and you were never meant to be the tooth fairy”.
“And ain’t I glad of it. Tutus don’t suit me”. Dean tried to catch Castiel’s eye line. Apart from his moments of melancholy Castiel seemed to be doing well adapting to humanity. He’d got the basics down… eating, sleeping, washing, shaving. They wouldn’t be letting him loose with an FBI badge any time soon, but that would come eventually. “You good Cas?”
Finally Castiel looked up at him with a small smile and a nod. Then he quirked a mischievous eyebrow. “Maybe if you had one in black…”
“Nu uh, no tutus”. Dean returned the smile and shivered. “Ok, I’m going to try and get some shut eye. Keep watch and we’ll switch later, then we can get marching”.
Dean was eager to be away, but he was bone tired and it might be a while before they found somewhere safe enough to sleep again. He lay down and cushioned his head with his arms. It was far from comfortable, but the way he felt he could fall asleep standing up. Dean was getting used to it, they had done without comfort for some time now… There was no comfort to be found in purgatory.
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Castiel watched Dean lie down and drift off. He was glad Dean seemed hopeful now, but in truth he didn’t know if the plan would work. On the occasions a door to purgatory had opened a ritual was being conducted on the other side. The memories of his own dark ritual haunted Castiel, the cold combined with it to make him shudder… Something told the former angel they weren’t going to be lucky enough to just come across a door and a ritual. Maybe they would be able to find some way of opening one from this side. It was a very big maybe. But he wondered at the creatures of purgatory. Thus far they had come across the base bestial sort… but there were higher thinking monsters out there that might be able to help. There were vampires for one, and Eleanor… Castiel sighed, the more he didn’t want to think about Eleanor the more he seemed to end up thinking about her.
Something else he thought of often… the pills. The ones he had started taking for his broken foot, and now took because… well, he needed to take them. It had stopped making sense some time ago. Castiel could walk alright now; a limp only became evident when he overdid things. Steph, the vet who assisted on their last werewolf case, gave the former angel’s foot an x-ray. It showed things hadn’t healed perfectly, but he wasn’t exactly crippled. All the running in purgatory qualified as overdoing things, so he relied on the pills more than ever, they kept him going. Of course Dean would have torn him a new one if he knew Castiel was still taking the drugs. So Castiel was sneaky about it, he would go for a ‘bathroom break’ and slip a few, or wait until Dean was asleep…
As Dean’s breathing lapsed into the even, light, huffs of sleep Castiel’s pill bottle started burning a hole in his pocket. Once he made sure Dean was away he leapt to his feet and rushed into the undergrowth, making sure he was deep enough to be well out of Dean’s line of sight should he wake. Some part of Castiel warned that he was supposed to be keeping watch, but the call of the pills was louder. Fumbling slightly the former angel pulled the bottle out and worked at the lid like an over eager puppy going at a can of dog food. He shook a couple of pills out and quickly swallowed them down. Then despondently Castiel realised the bottle no longer gave a comforting rattle. Those pills were his last. He had tried to ration them out and make them last… but this was inevitable, he knew this day would come. The bottle was empty, and there would be no more re-fills in purgatory. Involuntarily Castiel let out a wrecked sob, how was he supposed to continue without the pills? He needed them! Roughly he shoved the empty bottle back into his pocket, maybe just the feel of it there would offer some relief… Then he froze, hearing a rustle in the bushes. Shitshitshit… Dean!
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Dean was in a warm bed, Lisa by his side. The early morning sun’s warmth caressed him through the curtains. Their dog sniffed at his outstretched hand, dangling over the side of the bed… Wait, dog? They didn’t have a dog.
Dean cracked his eyes open to see a beast snuffling at his hand. It was a great hound, with matted fur, dark glowing red eyes, and sharp teeth. Dean could feel its fetid breath against his skin. Ice ran down his spine, should he stay still and hope the creature would lose interest and move on? Or should he jump up and risk it immediately going for his throat? The monster’s head suddenly shot up after hearing a branch crack in the undergrowth. Ears erect, it focussed its attention elsewhere. Dean took the opportunity to slide his hand across to a sharpened piece of rock, but before he got the chance to use it Castiel came barrelling out from between the trees with a yell.
“Get away from him!” The former angel swung a hefty branch at the beast. It dodged out of the way with a growl and bared its teeth at Castiel.
Dean was on his feet by now and heading for the two of them, but the beast lunged at Castiel first. It snapped its slathering jaws at the former angel… and he was ready for it. Castiel took a swing worthy of any baseball pro. The creature’s skull gave way beneath his blow, and then Castiel hit it again… and again. Its lifeless body fell to the ground with a satisfying thud. Still Castiel kept going; flecks of blood flew through the air at his violent barrage. He only stopped after hearing Dean’s angry voice.
“Where the hell were you?! I thought you were meant to be keeping watch?” Dean glared at Castiel.
The former angel dropped the branch and stepped away from the fallen monster. He seemed to shrink under the spotlight of Dean’s scrutiny.
“I had to… use the bathroom”. Castiel looked away from him sheepishly.
“Geez Cas, you should have woken me up. That thing could have bitten through my throat before I even realised it was there… Just don’t do anything like that again”.
“I’m sorry Dean”.
Dean tried hard not to let those words get to him as they had before. “Ok, it’s ok… We need to get moving, no doubt that thing has attracted a bit of attention”. He moved forward to stamp out what was left of their fire. “You’ll just have to wait for the next safe spot for a bit of shut eye”.
“I’ll be fine”.
“Ok, then pick a direction and put your best foot forward”. Dean made a note to make sure Castiel got his sleep. He seemed to be taking a page out of Dean’s book with the ‘I’m fine’ crap. Dean could see through it, and he could tell there was something off with the former angel. Sure this place was wearing on them both, but Castiel seemed to have aged while Dean slept. The slump in his shoulders, the anxious look of his eyes and the short disinterested way of speaking… it was worrying. Then there was the way Castiel whaled on that monster. It reminded Dean of his own outburst against the Impala after losing John. It wasn’t a good sign…
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The two of them set out at a good pace with Dean marching ahead and Castiel keeping up behind. When the former angel started flagging they would stop for a rest and set out again as soon as they could. How long they walked neither could tell… but mercifully their path was mostly trouble free. They had been attacked by a couple of large bat like creatures, and another great hound… Castiel had called it one of the mormolykeia, not that Dean cared as long as they ended up dead.
Castiel’s pace was slowing once again when Dean turned to ask if he was ok.
“I’m fine… I just need to rest for a moment. I’m ok, but Dean… do you feel as if we’re treading the same ground we’ve walked before?” Castiel sat down on a fallen tree as he took in their surroundings.
“Oh yeah, look there’s my favourite rock, I named him Sylvester”. Dean gave Castiel a withering look. “No Cas, there’s nothing I find familiar about this god-forsaken wasteland. All I know is we’ve been walking a straight line, so we can’t be going in circles or whatever…”
“Dean”. Castiel said his name quietly with a sense of urgency and shot to his feet. The former angel’s eyes were wide as he looked over Dean’s shoulder. Dean whirled around to follow his gaze.
A pair of yellow eyes stared back from the shadows.
As the creature took a step forward they could see it resembled a wolf… a wolf as large as a small horse. Its coat was as jet black as the surrounding darkness, though it made no move to attack.
“Who are you?” Castiel asked, Dean looked at him as if he were mad talking to the creature, but the former angel could sense a degree of intelligence behind those eyes… Something he had not seen in the rampant single minded beasts so far.
To Dean’s surprise the beast replied. Its words were half growled, but the voice was unmistakably female. “I am Voxifera… and you are the angel that nearly destroyed us all”.
Castiel’s grip tightened on the branch he had brought with him. The wolf noticed. “Put down your weapons, I mean you no harm… not yet anyway”.
“And that’s supposed to make us feel better?” Dean’s eyes narrowed.
“If I wanted to kill you I could have done so many times before now. I have been following you for a while… Did you notice your path thus far has been an easy one? I have been the one protecting you”.
“Well you’ve done a piss poor job of it. Those bat things and the mormy… morly… the big dog, they attacked us”. Dean pointed out, tripped up only by a minor note of pronunciation.
“The ‘bat things’ were beyond my reach… and regretfully Hecate’s bitches are, shall we say, outside of my influence somewhat”.
Dean’s suspicious expression hadn’t changed. “Ok Voxifera, who are you really? And why the hell are you following us?”
The wolf took in a deep breath, levelling its stare at Dean. She seemed to be weighing up how much to reveal to them both. “I am old… very old, you have surely met my kind before. They have been reduced to taking the form of dumb dogs in your world. But once they were all as great as this wolf you see before you. I am a skinwalker… though I have long forgotten my human face; I have no need of it down here. Word reached me of the hunter and his angel walking our realm… There are creatures here that speak of Dean Winchester as if he were the monster hiding in their closet. I wished to see this man of legend… and I do not believe my interest in the angel needs explaining. When you are as old as I am these things break the monotony…”
She stepped forward then and circled each man, taking in their scent, measuring them up. “You do not belong here. You are living, and you are not of our kind. Your coming is like the falling of small stones that bring about an avalanche. Some here may embrace it; most will want to be rid of you. As for myself, I have come to see which way the stones are falling… And so you have my interest. Do not lose it, for that would be very dangerous”. She seemed to give a wolfish grin then. “Tell me, little ones, what are you doing running so far and so fast?”
“We seek the boundaries of purgatory”. Castiel answered.
Voxifera laughed with a rough rasping bark. “Purgatory has no boundaries. We might be outside and alongside the other realms, but we occupy the places amid the places… ever moving, ever changing. Some think purgatory itself to be alive. If she likes you well enough she will make your path straight and true… if not you will wander her labyrinth endlessly. You cannot simply walk and find the edge. It may be right next to you tomorrow. It may be a hundred leagues from here, and then become a thousand leagues when you walk a hundred. Seek something else… or seek it another way”.
Dean’s patience was wearing thin. “How then? If you know so much why not tell us? How do we get out?”
“I know much, but I do not know that much. If we creatures were granted such knowledge purgatory would be a very empty place indeed”.
“Great. Fantastic. So what are we supposed to do? Sit here and stare at each other until the end of eternity?” Dean threw his hands up in the air.
“I had expected more from the great Dean Winchester, but come, do not despair. I have no such knowledge, but there is another… a being older than myself, maybe even as old as the Leviathans. He has not been seen or spoken to in a long, long time, for he makes his home in a mire none dare cross. I can take you to it”.
At hearing this Dean looked at the wolf with suspicion once again. “Why? What’s so hard about crossing a swamp?”
“Only those free from sin can easily cross. The weight of your sins and your guilt will pull you down to its depths… I’m sure you can imagine there are few without blood on their hands here”. The grin returned. “Who knows what is on the other side… Maybe you will find your boundary, maybe there is a gateway to Heaven. I only know that the First Beast is out there. If you wish to see him, follow me”.
She turned tail to leave then, pausing momentarily to look over her shoulder and see whether they were coming. Dean looked to Castiel, a questioning expression on his face. An icy hand had gripped Castiel’s heart upon hearing of the swamp and sin… he was sure he would sink like a stone if he went near it. But this was all they had to go on and he would not deny Dean a chance at freedom. So he gave a nod and started walking after Voxifera. “What other option do we have?” was whispered to Dean as he passed by.
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The two of them followed the shadowy figure of the wolf. It felt like they had been walking for leagues. Rest stops had become more frequent… as Castiel started lagging again Dean slowed to talk to him.
“Are you ok? Is it your foot?”
“No… no, I just need to rest. I’m just tired”. Castiel sat down again, wrapping his arms tight around his body.
Dean noticed the former angel was breathing hard, he seemed pale and held himself tightly, as if in pain and trying to hide it. Dean had seen that one before, during the process of getting Castiel back on his feet after the injury. Dean wasn’t buying this ‘just tired’ crap, but he also knew Castiel had a thing about showing weakness. He didn’t want to be useless. Dean could sympathise… all too often he would put up a façade and put on a show of being fine. So if Castiel wanted to pretend he was ok then Dean would play along and just do what he could to make things easy on the former angel.
“Ok, we’ll set up camp here, you can get some sleep”. They were following the line of a rock face; it seemed as good a place to stop as any. And true to her word Voxifera’s presence seemed to be keeping the beasts of purgatory off their back.
Dean turned back to tell the wolf they were stopping here and cursed as he found her gone. She must have kept going as they stalled behind. “Hey! Voxifera!”
“Don’t shout Dean… the creatures will hear you”. Castiel taut voice chastised him.
“I want the creatures to hear me… one particular creature anyway. Where the hell has she gone?”
A high pitched scream came in answer. The two went rigid and prepared to run, but then the bloodied figure of the werewolf casually walked out from the undergrowth.
“A ghoul was getting a little too close”. She said by way of explanation. Red stained her sharp teeth and glistened down the front of her fur.
Dean shook his head and relaxed. “Right… uh, well we’re going to stop here and rest up a while”.
“Very well…” Voxifera circled and lay down, looking for all the world like a terribly oversized guard dog. She kept her eyes on the trees, ears pricked, ever watchful.
All she could hear however was the muttered curses of Dean as he tried to start a fire without the use of his lighter. It had run out long ago and now he was left with more traditional (and frustrating) methods…
Eventually Dean managed to get a fire going; they both lay down next to it, taking a chance on leaving the wolf as lookout. Castiel closed his eyes but it wasn’t long before the angel shot up and dashed into the trees after muttering a hastened “Gotta pee”.
Dean cracked a concerned eye open and watched him go. Usually Castiel would announce rather formally that he had to visit the bathroom. Dean had said to him on one occasion “Geez Cas, do you see any rooms out here? Let alone baths? Just say you gotta pee man”. Of course Castiel stuck to his formal ways. That he gave in now was just another reason to worry.
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Castiel got as far into the trees as he could before resting his hand against a sturdy trunk and bending over to be sick. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand before taking a couple steps more and sinking to his knees. Involuntarily Castiel found himself reaching into his pocket and taking out the empty pill bottle. His fingers wrapped around it almost in a caressing fashion. He would give anything just to hear it rattle again with the comforting sound of his pills.
Withdrawal was setting in; this borrowed body was slowly succumbing to tremors, cramps and chills… Now the vomiting. He hid as much of it as he could from Dean. He supposed he wouldn’t be able to hide forever. Castiel’s eyes welled up. To go through this normally would be hard enough. But to be forced to go cold turkey in purgatory with nothing… and hiding from Dean when he just wanted to cry out for help… It was excruciating.
Castiel wiped at his eyes, he shoved the pill bottle back in his pocket and tried to gather himself together before returning to camp. He had been gone too long already. Then getting to his feet he turned to find himself facing Voxifera. The wolf stood watching him quietly.
“You’re sick”. She said. It was a statement of fact, with no accusation in her eyes.
“Don’t tell Dean… please”. Castiel looked at the ground, he felt caught in the act.
“What Dean knows or does not know is not my concern”.
“Thank you…”
“You realise you will not make it through the mire alive?” The wolf spoke plainly without emotion.
Castiel took in a harsh breath and met her eyes with a creased face as if holding back a sob. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because I prefer people to know when I am leading them to their death…A monster I might be to have ended up here, but I take no joy in cruelty or deception”. Though speaking plainly a hint of sadness seemed to creep into her voice. “The Righteous Man may make it, but your sins are great… greater than many who I have seen founder and fail. And ailing as you are…”
The former angel looked at Voxifera with renewed determination. “I know this, but I will not leave him to cross alone”.
She took a step closer and met his eyes with a fierce look. “And then when you run to your death with open arms and leave him in this place alone?”
The confrontation was sapping the energy from Castiel. He held out a hand to lean against a tree. “My place is at his side until I die… if that comes in the swamp, if it comes later, I accept it… I deserve it”.
“If you insist on crossing that is the sort of talk the swamp will prey on. You deserve nothing. Do not let it tell you that you do…” Voxifera seemed to notice his weariness; she sidled up alongside Castiel and indicated he should lean against her. “Now come, no doubt your Winchester will have started fretting by now”.
Castiel twisted a hand into her thick fur and reluctantly accepted her aid in walking back to camp.
Once settled back down beside the fire Castiel had started shivering and was unable to stop though he tried. Wordlessly Dean got to his feet and put his jacket around Castiel’s shoulders. He wasn’t giving the former angel a chance to object this time.
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When it came time to break camp Voxifera assured them the swamp was not far. Sure enough the thick trees gave way to a mire stretching as far as the eye could see. Though the eye could not see far, a dank fog lurked above the surface, concealing most of it from view. It looked like any other swamp that might be encountered on earth, but the deathly silence marked it as something different. There was no sound of beast nor bird, and no buzzing insects. Everything was still. Even the rest of purgatory had rustles and crunches from unseen creatures… Here there was nothing, just a void. Even the denizens of purgatory seemed afraid of it.
“So here we are… This is your last chance to turn back”. Voxifera spoke to them both, but she levelled a pointed gaze at Castiel.
The former angel looked away and shirked off Dean’s jacket. Dean took it from him and laid it down beside Voxifera. “Take care of that, I’ll be back for it”. It was dirty and torn by now, there didn’t seem much to take care of, but he was making it clear that he would be back… he would survive this.
Dean looked back at Castiel… he wasn’t so sure the former angel would survive. Apart from the elephant in the room of Castiel’s sins, he looked like death warmed up. “Hey Cas… you know, you can wait for me here. I’d rather let you look after my jacket than her anyway”.
“I’m coming Dean”. Castiel sought to give him a reassuring smile; it died on his lips too quickly.
“It’s just… you’re not at the top of your game, I can tell. Do you at least want to wait and rest up a while? Tackle this mother when you’re feeling better?”
“No Dean, I’ve rested as much as I can. Let’s just get this over with”. He stepped towards the edge of the swamp as if trying to prove himself fit for duty.
“Ok then… let’s do this”. He went to join Castiel and looked back at Voxifera. “See you later I guess”.
The wolf gave a solemn nod as she watched them step into the mire.
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This one's for believing
If only for its sake
Come on friends get up now
Love is to be made
“It looks like you are well and truly... on your own”.
From the moment Crowley uttered those words Sam’s mind focussed. He locked on to one goal… get Dean back. When Sam lost his brother before he had fallen apart a little… He felt the teeth of despair starting to gnaw at his bones even now, but Sam would not give in to it. Instead his resolve hardened. He was going to get Dean back and nothing would stand in his way. The world was not strong enough to keep the Winchesters apart.
Besides, Crowley was wrong. Sam was not on his own. However the demon was right about the leviathans needing to be crushed and Sam would use what contacts he had to do it. His first order of business was to call Garth and get a contingent of hunters down to Sucrocorp. They were to learn what they could of leviathan locations and operations, then torch the place. After that it would be a simple matter of hunting the monsters down as usual.
With the leviathans seen to Sam could turn his mind wholly to the task of finding Dean and Castiel. They had disappeared in the explosion of black goo… they must have been transported elsewhere or pulled away by some unseen force. Sam thought back to the moment he had been zapped from Lucifer’s path and placed on a plane. Could God…? No. The apocalypse had ended, so God was doubtlessly more unconcerned with their fate than he had been before.
Logic told Sam of four possibilities. Dean and Castiel could be somewhere on earth, in hell, in heaven, or in purgatory. Earth was a real possibility, and Sam wouldn’t put it past Crowley to have a hand in taking them to hell… Heaven was less likely. The angels were few, and a scattered, rudderless force at that. Castiel also had friends there still. It surely wouldn’t be too difficult for the two of them to get sent back to earth... He was sure Dean wouldn’t accept being up there and one way or another would make them send him back. Purgatory was the final option, and perhaps the worst one. If Castiel and Crowley had such a hard time opening the door it was going to be no cakewalk for Sam. He feared Dick’s demise had pulled his brother and friend into purgatory. It didn’t help matters that the current leading authority on purgatory would be Crowley… Sam really didn’t want to deal with that self important asshole of a demon if at all possible. But if it meant getting Dean back he would do what had to be done.
First things first Sam put in a few calls, trying to find somebody to do a bit of scrying for him. He didn’t have much luck… numbers were dead, he had run out of favours to cash in, and one contact had managed to ditch the supernatural life for apple pie. Despite Sam’s most ardent pleadings he refused to touch anything magic again… It was a shame people on the phone were out of the range of his puppy eyes. Sam cursed in frustration, but deep down he was maybe a little jealous. It crossed his mind - He could walk away, he could find his own piece of apple pie, but no… it would mean nothing without Dean. He could not in good conscience sit drinking beer with his brother stuck God knows where. Sam wouldn’t be able to have a normal life… his job, his family, his every interaction would feel like an act. And Sam started to see how cruel it had been to ask Dean not to look for a way to get him out of the cage… Normal was an idle fantasy, a fairytale life it wouldn’t do to dwell on. Sam refused to let it enter his thoughts again.
When Sam broke his reverie he found his fingers had settled over a familiar name scrawled across the yellowed page before him: Missouri. He dialled the number. Three rings, then somebody picked up.
After a moment of silence Missouri’s gentle yet sassy voice rang out over the line. “Sam? That you boy?”
“Yes Missouri, it’s me. How… how are you?”
“Figures, I knew I’d speak to you one last time before the end. Anyway I’m good, doing a damn sight better than you are I’d imagine”.
“Wait, what did you mean by ‘the end’?” Confusion leaked into Sam’s voice.
“You know my gift don’t work like that boy. Could be my end, your end, the world’s end… All I know is that I’d speak to you one last time, and here you are. Whatever the end is, it’s coming closer. Now you’re calling about your brother right?”
“Missouri you can’t just drop that on me and move on!”
“Sam Winchester, don’t you raise your voice at me! I’d whack you with a spoon if you were here, teach you some manners. Now clean your ear holes out boy, I told you I don’t know what it means. Wish I’d never said anything. It could be I get run over by a car tomorrow - it ain’t worth worrying about. And don’t fret, I’ll make sure I look both ways across the road. Now tell me what happened with Dean”.
“Dean, he… we were fighting leviathan, the head leviathan”.
“Mmm, they’re some mean sons of bitches so I hear”.
“Our friend Cas was with him, and when they killed the leviathan there was some sort of explosion. They just disappeared Missouri. I don’t know where they are…” He fought to keep his voice from wavering.
“You and your brother are special. I’m sure you’ve been told that a lot lately. There was always a spark of something in you boys, and I always wondered what it was doing in a goofy looking kid like Dean. But now your energy burns so brightly I could see you across the stars”. She paused then, as if wondering how to phrase her next words. “Honey… I can’t see Dean”.
“You mean… he’s dead?” Though disbelief crept into Sam’s voice it was a possibility he had considered. He just didn’t want to believe it. He believed with every fibre of his being that Dean was alive.
“No… no, he’s just gone. Death is different, death is natural. There is a hole in the world where Dean should be. Wherever he is he ain’t meant to be there. I’m sorry I can’t tell you where he is honey, I can only tell you he isn’t here”.
“Ok… thank you Missouri”. So that crossed earth off the ‘Where’s Dean?’ list.
“Sam… there’s something else: Seek a false prophet with a false face… look for a lamb with a dragon’s voice. I know it don’t make a lick of sense, but I just know this thing has what you need and I know I was meant to tell it to you”.
There was silence on the line as Sam considered her words, committing them to memory.
“When you find your brother give him my love, and take care of yourself Sam. Take care of Dean too, I know he’s your older brother but we all need looking after from time to time”.
“Look after yourself too Missouri, thank you… you’ve been good to us, and our dad”.
“I’ve always been glad to know you two boys, your daddy as well. All three of you were made out of the same stubborn but your hearts are among the truest I’ve known. Now go find your brother, and maybe I’ll see you again in another life”.
The line went dead before Sam had a chance to say anything more. He made a note to call Missouri again and prove her wrong. But for now he had research to do.
Chapter Two - For Your Forgiveness
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two bedraggled figures were huddled around a small fire. It wasn’t often they risked starting one, the smoke and flames would draw unwanted attention. But they found an alcove in a cliff side that would help to hide it… and they were cold, bitterly cold.
Dean and Castiel couldn’t tell how long they had been in purgatory. There was no night and day here. There was pitch black darkness and a lightening of the sky that washed the world into a grey wasteland. But there was no regularity to it. The darkness gave way apparently when it felt like it. Sometimes lasting hours, sometimes lasting days… but the passing of time was impossible to gauge. Dean eventually stopped trying to keep track of it and Castiel had never bothered in the first place.
Of course it was hard to keep track of anything really when you were constantly alert to the slightest movement in the depths of the trees. More often than not it meant you would be running for your life moments later. Or fighting… they had fashioned rudimentary weapons from sharp rocks and branches. It was not nearly enough to tackle half of purgatory’s denizens, and so running was usually the first option. It left them tired, this running and constant watchfulness. Purgatory seemed to wear on them, drag them down… but they kept on going.
“We can’t keep going like this man”. Dean held his jacket tightly around himself, the waver in his voice giving away how cold he felt. “We have to come up with a plan or something”.
Dean was sure that Sam was working tirelessly to get them out. He could imagine his brother hunched over his laptop in the small hours, surrounded by piles of books and fuelled by coffee. But time was screwy between hell and earth; it could be the same here. They could have been running for years while Sam turned a few pages. So Dean didn’t want to bet on one horse. If there was something to done from their end, he would rather be doing it. An eternity of running didn’t really appeal.
“I’m not sure what…” Castiel trailed off, his eyes were absorbed entirely by the dance of the flames in front him. He also held his arms tightly around himself, but the former angel was unlucky enough to have been trapped in purgatory wearing only a t-shirt.
“Dude, do you want my jacket? I swear you’re turning blue”.
“I’m fine”. Castiel watched the fire intently.
Dean turned his gaze outward at the trees momentarily. Thankfully it was light and any creatures would be easily seen. Then he looked back at Castiel, wondering how to phrase his question, wanting to tread lightly. “Hey, um… you kinda had purgatory in you that time, the souls anyway, did it give you any ideas on how we could get out?”
Castiel raised his wide eyes to Dean then. A haunted look saying he was recalling that time, which is why Dean didn’t want to mention it. “I… I learned nothing good from them”. His eyes flicked back to the fire. The former angel seemed deep in thought before he opened his mouth again. “But… there must be an end to purgatory, a place where doors can open. Heaven and hell are finite, as is earth itself; this place must have its boundaries too. There are places where realms meet, places of weakness between them, the devil’s gate, the cage…” The more Castiel went on the more excited he seemed to be about the possibility of getting out. “If we reach the boundary maybe we can find a door, it’s been done before… Eleanor”. Castiel said her name like it physically hurt to do so, his excitement stalled and he fell silent, eyes lost in the fire again.
“That’s good, if you think there’s a real chance we can get out then lets go with it”. Dean ignored the mention of Eleanor Visyak. They had enough to be depressed about without the reminder of Castiel’s actions bringing them down. And the possibility of escape had just presented itself. Finally they could do something, and this was reason for celebration in Dean’s eyes. “Ok, so we just pick a direction and walk?”
The question seemed to bring Castiel out of his dark thoughts. “As far as I can gather, that’s all we can do”.
“Great, sounds like a plan”.
Castiel said nothing in return. A companionable silence fell between the two… they had known each other too long and been through too much for silences to be awkward. Still, Dean felt the need to talk, to keep his mind off the cold and the terror this place held.
“Hey Cas, first thing I’m going to do when we get out of here is eat a burger this big”. He raised his hands to an impossible height. “And pie… God, what I would do for a piece of pie right now”.
“I don’t think my father heard you. And if he did I don’t think he would provide any baked goods”.
“Well if he knew what I’d do for some baked goods he might change his mind… So what are you going to do when we land topside?”
Castiel looked thoughtful for a moment and then wiped at the dirt on his arms. “I will get in a hot shower and never get out again”.
“Good choice dude. I’ll jump in the shower right after my burger… and after you’ve done with it, obviously”. Dean coughed awkwardly.
“Keeping clean was never a problem when I was an angel. Being human is so messy…” Castiel sighed and stared into the fire. “Everything about being human is so messy. Killing these purgatory beasts, it’s all hacking and blood and bone. If I was an angel I could burn them away with a touch. If I was an an-”
“Yeah, and if I was the tooth fairy… Quit talking like that Cas”. Dean was quick to derail Castiel’s train of thought. They had been down that track before and Dean knew the look on the fallen angel’s face. He was only torturing himself. It seemed his favourite pastime of late.
“But you never were the tooth fairy, and you were never meant to be the tooth fairy”.
“And ain’t I glad of it. Tutus don’t suit me”. Dean tried to catch Castiel’s eye line. Apart from his moments of melancholy Castiel seemed to be doing well adapting to humanity. He’d got the basics down… eating, sleeping, washing, shaving. They wouldn’t be letting him loose with an FBI badge any time soon, but that would come eventually. “You good Cas?”
Finally Castiel looked up at him with a small smile and a nod. Then he quirked a mischievous eyebrow. “Maybe if you had one in black…”
“Nu uh, no tutus”. Dean returned the smile and shivered. “Ok, I’m going to try and get some shut eye. Keep watch and we’ll switch later, then we can get marching”.
Dean was eager to be away, but he was bone tired and it might be a while before they found somewhere safe enough to sleep again. He lay down and cushioned his head with his arms. It was far from comfortable, but the way he felt he could fall asleep standing up. Dean was getting used to it, they had done without comfort for some time now… There was no comfort to be found in purgatory.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Castiel watched Dean lie down and drift off. He was glad Dean seemed hopeful now, but in truth he didn’t know if the plan would work. On the occasions a door to purgatory had opened a ritual was being conducted on the other side. The memories of his own dark ritual haunted Castiel, the cold combined with it to make him shudder… Something told the former angel they weren’t going to be lucky enough to just come across a door and a ritual. Maybe they would be able to find some way of opening one from this side. It was a very big maybe. But he wondered at the creatures of purgatory. Thus far they had come across the base bestial sort… but there were higher thinking monsters out there that might be able to help. There were vampires for one, and Eleanor… Castiel sighed, the more he didn’t want to think about Eleanor the more he seemed to end up thinking about her.
Something else he thought of often… the pills. The ones he had started taking for his broken foot, and now took because… well, he needed to take them. It had stopped making sense some time ago. Castiel could walk alright now; a limp only became evident when he overdid things. Steph, the vet who assisted on their last werewolf case, gave the former angel’s foot an x-ray. It showed things hadn’t healed perfectly, but he wasn’t exactly crippled. All the running in purgatory qualified as overdoing things, so he relied on the pills more than ever, they kept him going. Of course Dean would have torn him a new one if he knew Castiel was still taking the drugs. So Castiel was sneaky about it, he would go for a ‘bathroom break’ and slip a few, or wait until Dean was asleep…
As Dean’s breathing lapsed into the even, light, huffs of sleep Castiel’s pill bottle started burning a hole in his pocket. Once he made sure Dean was away he leapt to his feet and rushed into the undergrowth, making sure he was deep enough to be well out of Dean’s line of sight should he wake. Some part of Castiel warned that he was supposed to be keeping watch, but the call of the pills was louder. Fumbling slightly the former angel pulled the bottle out and worked at the lid like an over eager puppy going at a can of dog food. He shook a couple of pills out and quickly swallowed them down. Then despondently Castiel realised the bottle no longer gave a comforting rattle. Those pills were his last. He had tried to ration them out and make them last… but this was inevitable, he knew this day would come. The bottle was empty, and there would be no more re-fills in purgatory. Involuntarily Castiel let out a wrecked sob, how was he supposed to continue without the pills? He needed them! Roughly he shoved the empty bottle back into his pocket, maybe just the feel of it there would offer some relief… Then he froze, hearing a rustle in the bushes. Shitshitshit… Dean!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dean was in a warm bed, Lisa by his side. The early morning sun’s warmth caressed him through the curtains. Their dog sniffed at his outstretched hand, dangling over the side of the bed… Wait, dog? They didn’t have a dog.
Dean cracked his eyes open to see a beast snuffling at his hand. It was a great hound, with matted fur, dark glowing red eyes, and sharp teeth. Dean could feel its fetid breath against his skin. Ice ran down his spine, should he stay still and hope the creature would lose interest and move on? Or should he jump up and risk it immediately going for his throat? The monster’s head suddenly shot up after hearing a branch crack in the undergrowth. Ears erect, it focussed its attention elsewhere. Dean took the opportunity to slide his hand across to a sharpened piece of rock, but before he got the chance to use it Castiel came barrelling out from between the trees with a yell.
“Get away from him!” The former angel swung a hefty branch at the beast. It dodged out of the way with a growl and bared its teeth at Castiel.
Dean was on his feet by now and heading for the two of them, but the beast lunged at Castiel first. It snapped its slathering jaws at the former angel… and he was ready for it. Castiel took a swing worthy of any baseball pro. The creature’s skull gave way beneath his blow, and then Castiel hit it again… and again. Its lifeless body fell to the ground with a satisfying thud. Still Castiel kept going; flecks of blood flew through the air at his violent barrage. He only stopped after hearing Dean’s angry voice.
“Where the hell were you?! I thought you were meant to be keeping watch?” Dean glared at Castiel.
The former angel dropped the branch and stepped away from the fallen monster. He seemed to shrink under the spotlight of Dean’s scrutiny.
“I had to… use the bathroom”. Castiel looked away from him sheepishly.
“Geez Cas, you should have woken me up. That thing could have bitten through my throat before I even realised it was there… Just don’t do anything like that again”.
“I’m sorry Dean”.
Dean tried hard not to let those words get to him as they had before. “Ok, it’s ok… We need to get moving, no doubt that thing has attracted a bit of attention”. He moved forward to stamp out what was left of their fire. “You’ll just have to wait for the next safe spot for a bit of shut eye”.
“I’ll be fine”.
“Ok, then pick a direction and put your best foot forward”. Dean made a note to make sure Castiel got his sleep. He seemed to be taking a page out of Dean’s book with the ‘I’m fine’ crap. Dean could see through it, and he could tell there was something off with the former angel. Sure this place was wearing on them both, but Castiel seemed to have aged while Dean slept. The slump in his shoulders, the anxious look of his eyes and the short disinterested way of speaking… it was worrying. Then there was the way Castiel whaled on that monster. It reminded Dean of his own outburst against the Impala after losing John. It wasn’t a good sign…
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The two of them set out at a good pace with Dean marching ahead and Castiel keeping up behind. When the former angel started flagging they would stop for a rest and set out again as soon as they could. How long they walked neither could tell… but mercifully their path was mostly trouble free. They had been attacked by a couple of large bat like creatures, and another great hound… Castiel had called it one of the mormolykeia, not that Dean cared as long as they ended up dead.
Castiel’s pace was slowing once again when Dean turned to ask if he was ok.
“I’m fine… I just need to rest for a moment. I’m ok, but Dean… do you feel as if we’re treading the same ground we’ve walked before?” Castiel sat down on a fallen tree as he took in their surroundings.
“Oh yeah, look there’s my favourite rock, I named him Sylvester”. Dean gave Castiel a withering look. “No Cas, there’s nothing I find familiar about this god-forsaken wasteland. All I know is we’ve been walking a straight line, so we can’t be going in circles or whatever…”
“Dean”. Castiel said his name quietly with a sense of urgency and shot to his feet. The former angel’s eyes were wide as he looked over Dean’s shoulder. Dean whirled around to follow his gaze.
A pair of yellow eyes stared back from the shadows.
As the creature took a step forward they could see it resembled a wolf… a wolf as large as a small horse. Its coat was as jet black as the surrounding darkness, though it made no move to attack.
“Who are you?” Castiel asked, Dean looked at him as if he were mad talking to the creature, but the former angel could sense a degree of intelligence behind those eyes… Something he had not seen in the rampant single minded beasts so far.
To Dean’s surprise the beast replied. Its words were half growled, but the voice was unmistakably female. “I am Voxifera… and you are the angel that nearly destroyed us all”.
Castiel’s grip tightened on the branch he had brought with him. The wolf noticed. “Put down your weapons, I mean you no harm… not yet anyway”.
“And that’s supposed to make us feel better?” Dean’s eyes narrowed.
“If I wanted to kill you I could have done so many times before now. I have been following you for a while… Did you notice your path thus far has been an easy one? I have been the one protecting you”.
“Well you’ve done a piss poor job of it. Those bat things and the mormy… morly… the big dog, they attacked us”. Dean pointed out, tripped up only by a minor note of pronunciation.
“The ‘bat things’ were beyond my reach… and regretfully Hecate’s bitches are, shall we say, outside of my influence somewhat”.
Dean’s suspicious expression hadn’t changed. “Ok Voxifera, who are you really? And why the hell are you following us?”
The wolf took in a deep breath, levelling its stare at Dean. She seemed to be weighing up how much to reveal to them both. “I am old… very old, you have surely met my kind before. They have been reduced to taking the form of dumb dogs in your world. But once they were all as great as this wolf you see before you. I am a skinwalker… though I have long forgotten my human face; I have no need of it down here. Word reached me of the hunter and his angel walking our realm… There are creatures here that speak of Dean Winchester as if he were the monster hiding in their closet. I wished to see this man of legend… and I do not believe my interest in the angel needs explaining. When you are as old as I am these things break the monotony…”
She stepped forward then and circled each man, taking in their scent, measuring them up. “You do not belong here. You are living, and you are not of our kind. Your coming is like the falling of small stones that bring about an avalanche. Some here may embrace it; most will want to be rid of you. As for myself, I have come to see which way the stones are falling… And so you have my interest. Do not lose it, for that would be very dangerous”. She seemed to give a wolfish grin then. “Tell me, little ones, what are you doing running so far and so fast?”
“We seek the boundaries of purgatory”. Castiel answered.
Voxifera laughed with a rough rasping bark. “Purgatory has no boundaries. We might be outside and alongside the other realms, but we occupy the places amid the places… ever moving, ever changing. Some think purgatory itself to be alive. If she likes you well enough she will make your path straight and true… if not you will wander her labyrinth endlessly. You cannot simply walk and find the edge. It may be right next to you tomorrow. It may be a hundred leagues from here, and then become a thousand leagues when you walk a hundred. Seek something else… or seek it another way”.
Dean’s patience was wearing thin. “How then? If you know so much why not tell us? How do we get out?”
“I know much, but I do not know that much. If we creatures were granted such knowledge purgatory would be a very empty place indeed”.
“Great. Fantastic. So what are we supposed to do? Sit here and stare at each other until the end of eternity?” Dean threw his hands up in the air.
“I had expected more from the great Dean Winchester, but come, do not despair. I have no such knowledge, but there is another… a being older than myself, maybe even as old as the Leviathans. He has not been seen or spoken to in a long, long time, for he makes his home in a mire none dare cross. I can take you to it”.
At hearing this Dean looked at the wolf with suspicion once again. “Why? What’s so hard about crossing a swamp?”
“Only those free from sin can easily cross. The weight of your sins and your guilt will pull you down to its depths… I’m sure you can imagine there are few without blood on their hands here”. The grin returned. “Who knows what is on the other side… Maybe you will find your boundary, maybe there is a gateway to Heaven. I only know that the First Beast is out there. If you wish to see him, follow me”.
She turned tail to leave then, pausing momentarily to look over her shoulder and see whether they were coming. Dean looked to Castiel, a questioning expression on his face. An icy hand had gripped Castiel’s heart upon hearing of the swamp and sin… he was sure he would sink like a stone if he went near it. But this was all they had to go on and he would not deny Dean a chance at freedom. So he gave a nod and started walking after Voxifera. “What other option do we have?” was whispered to Dean as he passed by.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The two of them followed the shadowy figure of the wolf. It felt like they had been walking for leagues. Rest stops had become more frequent… as Castiel started lagging again Dean slowed to talk to him.
“Are you ok? Is it your foot?”
“No… no, I just need to rest. I’m just tired”. Castiel sat down again, wrapping his arms tight around his body.
Dean noticed the former angel was breathing hard, he seemed pale and held himself tightly, as if in pain and trying to hide it. Dean had seen that one before, during the process of getting Castiel back on his feet after the injury. Dean wasn’t buying this ‘just tired’ crap, but he also knew Castiel had a thing about showing weakness. He didn’t want to be useless. Dean could sympathise… all too often he would put up a façade and put on a show of being fine. So if Castiel wanted to pretend he was ok then Dean would play along and just do what he could to make things easy on the former angel.
“Ok, we’ll set up camp here, you can get some sleep”. They were following the line of a rock face; it seemed as good a place to stop as any. And true to her word Voxifera’s presence seemed to be keeping the beasts of purgatory off their back.
Dean turned back to tell the wolf they were stopping here and cursed as he found her gone. She must have kept going as they stalled behind. “Hey! Voxifera!”
“Don’t shout Dean… the creatures will hear you”. Castiel taut voice chastised him.
“I want the creatures to hear me… one particular creature anyway. Where the hell has she gone?”
A high pitched scream came in answer. The two went rigid and prepared to run, but then the bloodied figure of the werewolf casually walked out from the undergrowth.
“A ghoul was getting a little too close”. She said by way of explanation. Red stained her sharp teeth and glistened down the front of her fur.
Dean shook his head and relaxed. “Right… uh, well we’re going to stop here and rest up a while”.
“Very well…” Voxifera circled and lay down, looking for all the world like a terribly oversized guard dog. She kept her eyes on the trees, ears pricked, ever watchful.
All she could hear however was the muttered curses of Dean as he tried to start a fire without the use of his lighter. It had run out long ago and now he was left with more traditional (and frustrating) methods…
Eventually Dean managed to get a fire going; they both lay down next to it, taking a chance on leaving the wolf as lookout. Castiel closed his eyes but it wasn’t long before the angel shot up and dashed into the trees after muttering a hastened “Gotta pee”.
Dean cracked a concerned eye open and watched him go. Usually Castiel would announce rather formally that he had to visit the bathroom. Dean had said to him on one occasion “Geez Cas, do you see any rooms out here? Let alone baths? Just say you gotta pee man”. Of course Castiel stuck to his formal ways. That he gave in now was just another reason to worry.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Castiel got as far into the trees as he could before resting his hand against a sturdy trunk and bending over to be sick. He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand before taking a couple steps more and sinking to his knees. Involuntarily Castiel found himself reaching into his pocket and taking out the empty pill bottle. His fingers wrapped around it almost in a caressing fashion. He would give anything just to hear it rattle again with the comforting sound of his pills.
Withdrawal was setting in; this borrowed body was slowly succumbing to tremors, cramps and chills… Now the vomiting. He hid as much of it as he could from Dean. He supposed he wouldn’t be able to hide forever. Castiel’s eyes welled up. To go through this normally would be hard enough. But to be forced to go cold turkey in purgatory with nothing… and hiding from Dean when he just wanted to cry out for help… It was excruciating.
Castiel wiped at his eyes, he shoved the pill bottle back in his pocket and tried to gather himself together before returning to camp. He had been gone too long already. Then getting to his feet he turned to find himself facing Voxifera. The wolf stood watching him quietly.
“You’re sick”. She said. It was a statement of fact, with no accusation in her eyes.
“Don’t tell Dean… please”. Castiel looked at the ground, he felt caught in the act.
“What Dean knows or does not know is not my concern”.
“Thank you…”
“You realise you will not make it through the mire alive?” The wolf spoke plainly without emotion.
Castiel took in a harsh breath and met her eyes with a creased face as if holding back a sob. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because I prefer people to know when I am leading them to their death…A monster I might be to have ended up here, but I take no joy in cruelty or deception”. Though speaking plainly a hint of sadness seemed to creep into her voice. “The Righteous Man may make it, but your sins are great… greater than many who I have seen founder and fail. And ailing as you are…”
The former angel looked at Voxifera with renewed determination. “I know this, but I will not leave him to cross alone”.
She took a step closer and met his eyes with a fierce look. “And then when you run to your death with open arms and leave him in this place alone?”
The confrontation was sapping the energy from Castiel. He held out a hand to lean against a tree. “My place is at his side until I die… if that comes in the swamp, if it comes later, I accept it… I deserve it”.
“If you insist on crossing that is the sort of talk the swamp will prey on. You deserve nothing. Do not let it tell you that you do…” Voxifera seemed to notice his weariness; she sidled up alongside Castiel and indicated he should lean against her. “Now come, no doubt your Winchester will have started fretting by now”.
Castiel twisted a hand into her thick fur and reluctantly accepted her aid in walking back to camp.
Once settled back down beside the fire Castiel had started shivering and was unable to stop though he tried. Wordlessly Dean got to his feet and put his jacket around Castiel’s shoulders. He wasn’t giving the former angel a chance to object this time.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When it came time to break camp Voxifera assured them the swamp was not far. Sure enough the thick trees gave way to a mire stretching as far as the eye could see. Though the eye could not see far, a dank fog lurked above the surface, concealing most of it from view. It looked like any other swamp that might be encountered on earth, but the deathly silence marked it as something different. There was no sound of beast nor bird, and no buzzing insects. Everything was still. Even the rest of purgatory had rustles and crunches from unseen creatures… Here there was nothing, just a void. Even the denizens of purgatory seemed afraid of it.
“So here we are… This is your last chance to turn back”. Voxifera spoke to them both, but she levelled a pointed gaze at Castiel.
The former angel looked away and shirked off Dean’s jacket. Dean took it from him and laid it down beside Voxifera. “Take care of that, I’ll be back for it”. It was dirty and torn by now, there didn’t seem much to take care of, but he was making it clear that he would be back… he would survive this.
Dean looked back at Castiel… he wasn’t so sure the former angel would survive. Apart from the elephant in the room of Castiel’s sins, he looked like death warmed up. “Hey Cas… you know, you can wait for me here. I’d rather let you look after my jacket than her anyway”.
“I’m coming Dean”. Castiel sought to give him a reassuring smile; it died on his lips too quickly.
“It’s just… you’re not at the top of your game, I can tell. Do you at least want to wait and rest up a while? Tackle this mother when you’re feeling better?”
“No Dean, I’ve rested as much as I can. Let’s just get this over with”. He stepped towards the edge of the swamp as if trying to prove himself fit for duty.
“Ok then… let’s do this”. He went to join Castiel and looked back at Voxifera. “See you later I guess”.
The wolf gave a solemn nod as she watched them step into the mire.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This one's for believing
If only for its sake
Come on friends get up now
Love is to be made
“It looks like you are well and truly... on your own”.
From the moment Crowley uttered those words Sam’s mind focussed. He locked on to one goal… get Dean back. When Sam lost his brother before he had fallen apart a little… He felt the teeth of despair starting to gnaw at his bones even now, but Sam would not give in to it. Instead his resolve hardened. He was going to get Dean back and nothing would stand in his way. The world was not strong enough to keep the Winchesters apart.
Besides, Crowley was wrong. Sam was not on his own. However the demon was right about the leviathans needing to be crushed and Sam would use what contacts he had to do it. His first order of business was to call Garth and get a contingent of hunters down to Sucrocorp. They were to learn what they could of leviathan locations and operations, then torch the place. After that it would be a simple matter of hunting the monsters down as usual.
With the leviathans seen to Sam could turn his mind wholly to the task of finding Dean and Castiel. They had disappeared in the explosion of black goo… they must have been transported elsewhere or pulled away by some unseen force. Sam thought back to the moment he had been zapped from Lucifer’s path and placed on a plane. Could God…? No. The apocalypse had ended, so God was doubtlessly more unconcerned with their fate than he had been before.
Logic told Sam of four possibilities. Dean and Castiel could be somewhere on earth, in hell, in heaven, or in purgatory. Earth was a real possibility, and Sam wouldn’t put it past Crowley to have a hand in taking them to hell… Heaven was less likely. The angels were few, and a scattered, rudderless force at that. Castiel also had friends there still. It surely wouldn’t be too difficult for the two of them to get sent back to earth... He was sure Dean wouldn’t accept being up there and one way or another would make them send him back. Purgatory was the final option, and perhaps the worst one. If Castiel and Crowley had such a hard time opening the door it was going to be no cakewalk for Sam. He feared Dick’s demise had pulled his brother and friend into purgatory. It didn’t help matters that the current leading authority on purgatory would be Crowley… Sam really didn’t want to deal with that self important asshole of a demon if at all possible. But if it meant getting Dean back he would do what had to be done.
First things first Sam put in a few calls, trying to find somebody to do a bit of scrying for him. He didn’t have much luck… numbers were dead, he had run out of favours to cash in, and one contact had managed to ditch the supernatural life for apple pie. Despite Sam’s most ardent pleadings he refused to touch anything magic again… It was a shame people on the phone were out of the range of his puppy eyes. Sam cursed in frustration, but deep down he was maybe a little jealous. It crossed his mind - He could walk away, he could find his own piece of apple pie, but no… it would mean nothing without Dean. He could not in good conscience sit drinking beer with his brother stuck God knows where. Sam wouldn’t be able to have a normal life… his job, his family, his every interaction would feel like an act. And Sam started to see how cruel it had been to ask Dean not to look for a way to get him out of the cage… Normal was an idle fantasy, a fairytale life it wouldn’t do to dwell on. Sam refused to let it enter his thoughts again.
When Sam broke his reverie he found his fingers had settled over a familiar name scrawled across the yellowed page before him: Missouri. He dialled the number. Three rings, then somebody picked up.
After a moment of silence Missouri’s gentle yet sassy voice rang out over the line. “Sam? That you boy?”
“Yes Missouri, it’s me. How… how are you?”
“Figures, I knew I’d speak to you one last time before the end. Anyway I’m good, doing a damn sight better than you are I’d imagine”.
“Wait, what did you mean by ‘the end’?” Confusion leaked into Sam’s voice.
“You know my gift don’t work like that boy. Could be my end, your end, the world’s end… All I know is that I’d speak to you one last time, and here you are. Whatever the end is, it’s coming closer. Now you’re calling about your brother right?”
“Missouri you can’t just drop that on me and move on!”
“Sam Winchester, don’t you raise your voice at me! I’d whack you with a spoon if you were here, teach you some manners. Now clean your ear holes out boy, I told you I don’t know what it means. Wish I’d never said anything. It could be I get run over by a car tomorrow - it ain’t worth worrying about. And don’t fret, I’ll make sure I look both ways across the road. Now tell me what happened with Dean”.
“Dean, he… we were fighting leviathan, the head leviathan”.
“Mmm, they’re some mean sons of bitches so I hear”.
“Our friend Cas was with him, and when they killed the leviathan there was some sort of explosion. They just disappeared Missouri. I don’t know where they are…” He fought to keep his voice from wavering.
“You and your brother are special. I’m sure you’ve been told that a lot lately. There was always a spark of something in you boys, and I always wondered what it was doing in a goofy looking kid like Dean. But now your energy burns so brightly I could see you across the stars”. She paused then, as if wondering how to phrase her next words. “Honey… I can’t see Dean”.
“You mean… he’s dead?” Though disbelief crept into Sam’s voice it was a possibility he had considered. He just didn’t want to believe it. He believed with every fibre of his being that Dean was alive.
“No… no, he’s just gone. Death is different, death is natural. There is a hole in the world where Dean should be. Wherever he is he ain’t meant to be there. I’m sorry I can’t tell you where he is honey, I can only tell you he isn’t here”.
“Ok… thank you Missouri”. So that crossed earth off the ‘Where’s Dean?’ list.
“Sam… there’s something else: Seek a false prophet with a false face… look for a lamb with a dragon’s voice. I know it don’t make a lick of sense, but I just know this thing has what you need and I know I was meant to tell it to you”.
There was silence on the line as Sam considered her words, committing them to memory.
“When you find your brother give him my love, and take care of yourself Sam. Take care of Dean too, I know he’s your older brother but we all need looking after from time to time”.
“Look after yourself too Missouri, thank you… you’ve been good to us, and our dad”.
“I’ve always been glad to know you two boys, your daddy as well. All three of you were made out of the same stubborn but your hearts are among the truest I’ve known. Now go find your brother, and maybe I’ll see you again in another life”.
The line went dead before Sam had a chance to say anything more. He made a note to call Missouri again and prove her wrong. But for now he had research to do.
Chapter Two - For Your Forgiveness