Now and Again (1/??)
Title: Now and Again
Author: alissablue
Rating: PG-13/R, will be NC-17 eventually.
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Noah, other Oakdale characters and an OC here or there.
Category: Fix it-fic, AU
Summary: “If men define situations as real, they are real in their consequences.”- W.I. Thomas
Warnings: Angsty Angst, some mindfuckery
Disclaimer: Do not own. Wish I did, though. I could make them do all sorts of kinky stuff.
A/N: Keywords for this fic are ‘patience’ and ‘payoff’. I have been working on this since... September(?) and I've finally written enough chapters to start posting. Title credit goes to my epically awesome beta slayerkitty, who deserves a round of applause for sitting through my long rants, freak outs, smut-related giggles and posting hesitation.
A/N: Me + comments is like... Reid + Sandwiches<3.
Prologue
Chapter 1: I think I need a new doctor
January
“If I’m ever gonna see again, then I’m gonna need this doctor. Luke, you have to try. I only want this one.”
“Well, let’s get Dr. Shepherd to Oakdale, then.”
********
February
“Dr. Oliver? Never heard of him.”
“He’s this brilliant neurosurgeon in Dallas. He wrote that article I was telling you about, about Alzheimer patients.”
“Oh, really?”
“Yeah, he’s brilliant, one of the best doctors I’ve ever met. Young and a bit of an ass, though, but already making a name for himself.”
“I’d love to meet him.”
********
March
“Noah, where do we go from here?”
“Luke, I need to be by myself. I need to learn to take care of myself. And I don’t want to have to resent you. Your help is the last thing I need right now.”
“What about what I need?”
“Luke…”
“No. No more. I need more from you right now, more than this and if you can’t give me that, then I can’t do this anymore.”
********
April
“What the hell do you think you’re doing? You’re putting me on suspension for this?”
“Dr. Oliver…I’m sorry, but-”
"No, don’t even pretend to be sorry about this. You can shove that apology right up your-“
“Reid…It’s only temporary and you know that.”
“Is it? Because last time I checked, he won’t stop until I never get to see the inside of an OR again.”
********
May
“ I need to talk to you.”
“About what exactly?”
“Dr. Hughes, I think it’s time.”
“What are you saying?”
“Bob… I’m- I’m trying to tell you that I’m ready to leave this hospital behind and retire. I’m ready for someone else to take over the Neuro wing.”
********
June
On a quiet morning in mid June, Luke Snyder awoke with a start at the buzzing sound of his alarm clock in Oakdale, Illinois. Groaning at the sudden awakening and slamming on his alarm clock without so much as a second glance, Luke lay in his bed, kicked the light blue sheets off of his body, as he felt the beginning of a burning summer heat on his arms, seeping through the window. He stared at his off-white ceiling and traced the faded lines of paintbrush strokes with his eyes. Someone should really add a new layer of paint to this.
He blinked once, twice and again, still lingering on that fine line between sleep and awareness, trying to remember the dream he had just woken up from. Luke remembered bits and pieces, tiny snippets of a dream so vivid, it might has well have been a memory.
Closing his eyes, he could still smell the coffee mug in his hands - Caramel latté, whipped cream, extra shot -, feel his own tongue licking his lips as a kneejerk reaction to the welcome touch of a stranger - who didn’t seem so strange - on his upper arm and hear the voice of the man in front of him - Believe it or not, Mister Snyder, I’m impressed - , who, after several months was still unrecognizable to him.
Luke had been having vivid dreams about this same stranger for months now and he couldn’t for the life of him, figure out what the hell was going on. He had no memory of ever meeting the guy, the seemingly abrasive, curly haired man in a pair of blue scrubs, yet he showed up in almost every one of his dreams. They’d laugh and talk and Luke had no control over what happened in the dreams, as if he was there, but really wasn’t. Watching himself, while being himself, but not himself at all.
And every time, he tried to memorize every inch, every little fiber of the man, everything that made him, him. But every following morning, the first thing he felt, was the loss of what he had tried so hard to memorize. His eyes, his face and his skin - his skin - were the first to go, followed by the sound of his voice ringing in his ears and the sound of his name on Luke’s lips, like a mantra, repeated throughout the night.
Reid. Reid. Reid. What?
It had started out on January 19th, when he had woken up with an agonizing, disturbing scream, tears running down his cheeks and clutching his heart -It’s Reid’s, Reid’s, Reid’s heart -, feeling as if someone was using their cold, unsteady hands to pull at it, tear, try to pry, no, rip it out of his chest. He couldn’t describe the feeling that haunted him as he woke up, as anything other than having a gaping hole in his chest, affecting him unlike any other dream he had ever had. And for a moment, it felt like genuine heartache, grief even. Grief he couldn’t place.
Grief that momentarily broke him.
The last thing he had remembered about that dream, were his fingertips softly brushing past the pale shoulder of a bloodied, bruised and broken body and the sight of it had kept him up for days. He had no idea why the image, the lingering impression the brushing had left on his fingertips, had gotten to him so much, why it shocked him to the core, raising the tiny, blonde hairs on the back of his neck and why he’d been so upset about it. Was it a figment of his imagination, a meaningless dream or some idea for a novel he’d forgotten about, which had gotten lost in his chaotic mind? Had he met the man before? And if so, why couldn’t he remember?
But Luke didn’t have time to dwell on it.
Soon after his first agonizing dream, Damian left town, leaving him with a shipping company, the tension between him and Noah kept increasing, his parents and Molly were having more drama and his siblings were either drugged out, crying all over the place or asking confusing questions. Luke didn’t even have time to process his life during the day, let alone at night and after a while, the memory of that first night became nothing but a blip on his radar and all the other dreams, dreams of better days and happier times after that, became highlights of his life to look forward to.
********
“Luke? Luke, get up!” Luke snapped out his trail of thought, crudely brought back to reality by his younger sister. Natalie and her signified Snyder smile stood in the doorway, excited as always to see him. Natalie was bouncy, very girly and adorable, but at her age already had a certain sadness in her eyes, which only a few people could see. And Luke knew he had always been her hero, the one person who was always there when their parents were too busy making and breaking up and Luke had done his best to protect her from their dysfunctional family, but even he knew his efforts hadn’t always been enough. Far from enough, in fact.
“Nat, what’s wrong? What are you doing?”
“Noah’s on the phone. He wants to talk to you.”
“Oh, alright. Thanks.” Natalie walked over to him and planted a sweet kiss on his forehead, before handing him the phone. Luke returned her smile and scrunched up his nose, knowing this would get a good laugh out of her and succeeding, as she skipped away, giggling at her goofy older brother.
“Hi, Noah. Where are you?”
“Luke, can you come to the hospital?”
“Right now?”
“Yes, now, Luke. I need to talk to you about something.”
“What’s it about? Do you need me to sign a form for you or something?”
“No, nothing like that. I just need your help.”
“What do you need?”
“I think I need a new doctor.”
NEXT
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A/N:Thanks for reading, comments/questions/rants/whatnot are love<333!