Suspended Pain, I Cannot Face the Black Flame {A Belle Series Ficlet}
This is a small ficlet that has been running around in my head for days now. Wasn't sure if I was ever going to write it or post it, but I decided to go ahead.
The title is lyrics from the Renaissance song Black Flame. I don't own it or Renaissance.
I'm not entirely sure how the Time War ended other than the Doctor ended it with the destruction of Gallifrey. This is my take on it. It's rather dark, but lightens up at the end.
The italics are Ten's thoughts/nightmare.
As always, I don't own Ten, Donna, or Doctor Who. The BBC does. Please read and enjoy...
Press the button. Press the button NOW!
Shaking. TARDIS whining, engines rumbling. Get away. Get AWAY. No. Die here. Die with the others, in the sky, on the planet. Stop it. STOP IT…
White light. It’s taking everything. Don’t like the white light. But the white light is the end. Their end, our end, peace. Go into the light. No. Can’t. Have to make sure the end comes. No one else to do it. Oh Rassilon listen to the screams…
Screams. Screams inside. Millions upon millions of screams.
Rumbling, creaking, moaning. Burning. Burning and screams. Burning and pain. Burning and death…
Stop it. Stop it please. Can’t take the screams. Can’t take the cries of death. It hurts. Please stop. Pleasepleaseplease…
Louder and louder. Hotter and hotter. Gallifrey is burning. Gallifrey is crying. Gallifrey is screaming. Burning, screaming, dying…
Silence. Finally. Silence. It’s done. But oh…such a horrid silence. Unnatural silence. Millions of voices silenced in one terrible moment. Gallifrey is…gone.
Someone is wailing. Someone is crying. TARDIS is crying. Oh Rassilon but it hurts. All alone. Silence inside and out save for the wailing of a TARDIS and her Time Lord. The last Time Lord. Alone. So, so alone now. Just them.
There’s another voice, two voices, no three. One saying his name quietly but with some urgency, as soft hands squeeze his shoulders. The second voice is keening lowly from a distance. The third is in his head, a song. A loud song. The TARDIS’s song. He feels his hearts hammering in his chest, his bypass has activated leaving him quite literally without a breath. The song gets quieter, as the voice that goes with the soft comforting hands gets louder, and the hands move to his face.
His bypass disengages, and he inhales a great gasp of air, his eyes open, and he sits up. He looks at his surroundings, and reality settles in. The soft voice belongs to Donna, who is now soothing him, pressing kisses to his sweat and tear covered face. The keening is Belle who is standing near the door, in her pajamas minus the sensory web. The TARDIS is still singing to him. He takes deep slow breaths, as per Donna’s instructions, and when he feels calm, or calmer than before, because he’s never fully calm right away after these dreams of Gallifrey’s destruction, he calls out to Belle, who shuffles her way over to his bed.
When Belle is seated on the bed, Donna retrieves a clean unsweaty shirt for him to change into. He does, and allows Donna to shift them all around so they are in the bed together. It takes a while, but one by one they fall asleep, he is the last to do so, but he thinks he’ll be able to sleep better now with his new family surrounding him, and the comforting song of the TARDIS in his mind. It’s the gentle flickering light of love from them that calms the black flame of his nightmares.
The title is lyrics from the Renaissance song Black Flame. I don't own it or Renaissance.
I'm not entirely sure how the Time War ended other than the Doctor ended it with the destruction of Gallifrey. This is my take on it. It's rather dark, but lightens up at the end.
The italics are Ten's thoughts/nightmare.
As always, I don't own Ten, Donna, or Doctor Who. The BBC does. Please read and enjoy...
Press the button. Press the button NOW!
Shaking. TARDIS whining, engines rumbling. Get away. Get AWAY. No. Die here. Die with the others, in the sky, on the planet. Stop it. STOP IT…
White light. It’s taking everything. Don’t like the white light. But the white light is the end. Their end, our end, peace. Go into the light. No. Can’t. Have to make sure the end comes. No one else to do it. Oh Rassilon listen to the screams…
Screams. Screams inside. Millions upon millions of screams.
Rumbling, creaking, moaning. Burning. Burning and screams. Burning and pain. Burning and death…
Stop it. Stop it please. Can’t take the screams. Can’t take the cries of death. It hurts. Please stop. Pleasepleaseplease…
Louder and louder. Hotter and hotter. Gallifrey is burning. Gallifrey is crying. Gallifrey is screaming. Burning, screaming, dying…
Silence. Finally. Silence. It’s done. But oh…such a horrid silence. Unnatural silence. Millions of voices silenced in one terrible moment. Gallifrey is…gone.
Someone is wailing. Someone is crying. TARDIS is crying. Oh Rassilon but it hurts. All alone. Silence inside and out save for the wailing of a TARDIS and her Time Lord. The last Time Lord. Alone. So, so alone now. Just them.
There’s another voice, two voices, no three. One saying his name quietly but with some urgency, as soft hands squeeze his shoulders. The second voice is keening lowly from a distance. The third is in his head, a song. A loud song. The TARDIS’s song. He feels his hearts hammering in his chest, his bypass has activated leaving him quite literally without a breath. The song gets quieter, as the voice that goes with the soft comforting hands gets louder, and the hands move to his face.
His bypass disengages, and he inhales a great gasp of air, his eyes open, and he sits up. He looks at his surroundings, and reality settles in. The soft voice belongs to Donna, who is now soothing him, pressing kisses to his sweat and tear covered face. The keening is Belle who is standing near the door, in her pajamas minus the sensory web. The TARDIS is still singing to him. He takes deep slow breaths, as per Donna’s instructions, and when he feels calm, or calmer than before, because he’s never fully calm right away after these dreams of Gallifrey’s destruction, he calls out to Belle, who shuffles her way over to his bed.
When Belle is seated on the bed, Donna retrieves a clean unsweaty shirt for him to change into. He does, and allows Donna to shift them all around so they are in the bed together. It takes a while, but one by one they fall asleep, he is the last to do so, but he thinks he’ll be able to sleep better now with his new family surrounding him, and the comforting song of the TARDIS in his mind. It’s the gentle flickering light of love from them that calms the black flame of his nightmares.