Written All Over My Face (4/?)
Written All Over My Face
Author: alienanalysis
Title: Written All Over My Face (4/?)
Pairing: Kradam
Rating: R
Summary: While a blissful Kris dreams of a Disney-style happily ever after, in contrast Adam can’t help worrying that his perfect life is about to come crumbling down
Length: 1,800
Disclaimer: Thisisaworkoffictionidontowneitheroftheguysmaycontainstronglanguageandcontentofasexualnatureblahblahblah.
Notes: Time for some sappy/romantic/corny Kris, and angsty/dark/skurred Adam. There’s some dark stuff coming up soon, although I’ll try and mix it in with a bit of humor and of course, more hot bedroom action ;)
Previous chapters:
Chapter 1: A conversation with a chat-show shrink makes Kris finally realize the feelings he’d been hiding in the deepest, darkest part of his mind for months
Chapter 2: Kris searches for the right words to tell Adam his feelings, but it isn’t an easy task. How exactly can he tell Adam he wants to stick his tongue down his throat when he can’t even get his tongue to function enough to speak..?
Chapter 3: Still unable to find the right words to tell Adam, Kris decides to let their bodies do the talking during a seemingly innocent cuddle in Adam’s bed.
Kris was in for yet another sleepless night. But rather than tossing and turning in frustration as he had done so many times lately, this time it was the gorgeous dark-haired man lying naked in his arms that was keeping him awake.
All he could do was stroke Adam’s freckled arms and grin to himself, still in a state of elation and bliss.
Oh, and pain. But from watching a few dirty videos online and reading some Kradam fan fics as ‘research’ for the big moment, Kris knew that it was gonna hurt.
Not that he’d complained about the pain just an hour ago when Adam was working his way inside him, gently at first before Kris had begged him to push harder. Kris never thought he’d get so much pleasure from another guy, but with Adam it felt so natural and right.
Kris couldn’t stop going over all the details in his mind. After kissing and fumbling for some time, Kris had begged Adam to take the Next Step. And obviously, Adam had been happy to oblige. He squeezed his eyes shut and let out a gasp as he recalled the first moment Adam’s soft, moist lips had met his cock, and the ecstasy that had followed as he’d glided his tongue around the tip first before taking Kris’s full length in his mouth.
He thought he’d be terrified at what came next, but by that point he was in such a state of arousal and horniness that he was happy for Adam to instruct him to ‘turn over’ then begin to do the dirty.
Oh, Adam certainly was dirty. Kris’s mouth curled into a wide grin thinking about the long, drawn-out grunts he’s made with each thrust and the sexy compliments he’d whispered in Kris’s ear.
The sex had been mind-blowing, but what Kris loved equally was the cuddling up together afterwards. He sighed blissfully as he remembered the sweet kisses Adam had planted down his neck as they’d snuggled together under the covers, talking about everything and anything.
He couldn’t wait for every night to be like that. No more cold, lonely nights with just his hand and print-outs of Adam in his Crawl Thru Fire pants. No, he had the real thing now, pants optional.
Kris had it all planned out in his head already. He’d always had a secret weakness for sappy romantic movies with a happily ever after. He felt like the lead character at the end of a Disney movie grinning happily with their Prince Charming, only with R-rated out-takes during the end credits.
He couldn’t wait to start his whole new adventure with Adam. He was itching to run back to his rented apartment the next day to pack up his belongings and move them into Adam’s extravagant new home. He pictured his toothbrush in the bathroom next to Adam’s. He pictured waking up to the smell of fresh pancakes and sharing a platter with Adam on the patio in the morning sunshine. He pictured doing the most mundane, domestic tasks with Adam like doing the dishes, him washing and Adam drying. He pictured helping Adam fix his hair and Adam returning the favor by letting him wear some of his eyeliner... well, one step at a time.
The most exciting image of all was already in front of him. That beautiful sight he’d wake up to every morning.
Even without his trademark eyeliner, with messy just-been-fucked hair and his freckle-covered arms on full view, Kris had never seen anything so breathtakingly beautiful. He had no idea why Adam always insisted on hiding behind all that make-up and coving up his arms. He was simply stunning in his natural state, and Kris had told him that repeatedly already that evening.
It wasn’t just the sex or the physical attraction though. It was much deeper than that. Kris felt like a better person when he was with Adam. He’d changed Kris’s life on so many levels. He’d expanded Kris’s horizons and opened his eyes to so much on a spiritual and philosophical level, and made Kris truly believe in the power he had to make things happen in his life.
He’d also made Kris a more confident performer, always so encouraging and complimentary about his music and always giving him advice and guidance. Ironically, he felt that without that extra guidance he wouldn’t have won Idol. But Adam had been the first to hug and congratulate him on his win.
Kris felt he dressed better than before, his fashion sense had sharpened and thanks to Adam he knew how to pick out jeans that fitted. Oh, and he’d even started using moisturizer.
Kris moved his hand from where it was resting on the back of Adam’s neck and began stroking his soft, glossy hair, still dreaming about what their future had in store. Perhaps one day when the laws changed they might get married, then take a year off from their careers to travel the world. He could imagine sitting in the mountains of Peru out in the open with just a fire to keep them warm, as Kris strummed his guitar and they wrote a song. He could imagine going to a remote tropic island somewhere like Thailand, and just sitting silently on the sand together looking out at the tranquil sea and enjoying the seclusion.
He pictured them retiring together once they’d tired of the music scene, to spend their senior years in a peaceful beachside retreat, days spent reminiscing about their youth and writing and performing music alone together, just for pure enjoyment.
OK, maybe he was getting just a little carried away there. But as he lay in Adam’s arms listening to his soft breathing, he realized he’d never felt happier to be alive. He couldn’t wait for life to really begin.
His eyes finally getting heavy and tiredness kicking in, Kris rested his head on Adam’s shoulder and closed his eyes, ready to drift off into sweet dreams.
Not that he needed to dream any more.
Life was perfect.
*
Adam had been lying as still as possible for the last hour using all the acting skills he’d acquired throughout his years of theater to pretend he was asleep, but Kris’s constant stroking and nuzzling wasn’t making it easy.
He knew he should be enjoying it, cherishing it, savoring every second. But instead his mind was in overdrive, imagining what would come next.
Not just the Morning After scenario, no he was looking further ahead than that. If Kris were to slink out of the bed sheepishly to head to the shower then mumble something about the funny affect that a divorce and lack of sleep had on him, he’d be heartbroken and feel like crap... but what seemed even scarier than that was what if Kris really did want this and that he was willing to enter into a relationship?
It was almost too good to be true. And that was what Adam was so scared of.
Adam was already living out his ultimate fantasy life, getting to play dress-up every day, work with top producers, hang out with movie stars and have personal assistants to do all his mundane chores for him 24/7. In the past year, he’d already achieved way more than he could have ever dreamed of, and every day found himself waking up in disbelief and struggling to comprehend that this was actually happening to him.
He was one of the most talked about celebrities in the country. He had reduced legendary rock stars into flailing fan-boys. His album had shot to number one on Amazon two months before its release. He had been on the cover of Rolling freaking Stone!
And now... this?
He was On Top, where he always joked he liked to be. He’d thought that there really wasn’t much more he could wish for that he didn’t already have, but as he opened an eye and sneaked a look at Kris lying naked next to him, he realized it just had.
Adam lay paralyzed in fear of where things could go from there. Surely what goes up, must come down..?
He was supposedly this fearless, fierce glittery alien, yet he had no greater fear than everything coming crashing down. He knew things couldn’t continue to be this epic forever. The media and public would soon tire of him constantly being in the magazines. His record sales would subside once the initial buzz was over. New copycat singers would jump on the bandwagon and steal his limelight.
And Kris wouldn’t be able to deal with it all.
Adam let out a sad sigh, realizing he and Kris would be doomed from the start. Firstly, 19E and the record labels would go nuts at them and insist on keeping everything under wraps. Adam hated the idea of having to lie and keep secrets, always very proud to be such an ‘open book’ with nothing to hide.
Also, his lifestyle was so high-octane and crazy, even compared to Kris’s busy schedule. Would they even get to spend much time together in between the constant press events and touring?
And would Kris be able to cope with the bitchy comments from the media? The over-excited fan girls who would insist they’d been right all along? The paparazzi hounding them everywhere they went?
Oh, and the homophobic folk from the Bible Belt who would quickly disown him and never buy one of his records again?
Even if Kris insisted he was cool with it all, Adam was reluctant to drag him through all that crap. He’d faced enough adversity himself through the years to know it was hard to be a gay man in the music industry. He was glad to be from somewhere as liberal as California, and have lived somewhere gay-friendly like West Hollywood for many years where it was fine to hold hands with another guy down the street. But he knew Arkansas was certainly not as tolerant.
Adam shook his head and tried to dispel all the negative, worrying thoughts on his mind. He always had such a positive attitude and a firm belief that anything was possible with the right attitude. He always went about every aspect of his life in a positive, proactive way. It was the philosophy he’d lived his life by for a long time, which has got him this far already. He hated having such negative, gloomy thoughts.
But he couldn’t help it. He was just being realistic.
And Adam had always felt he had a strong intuition, that he could pick up on vibes and envision things before they actually happened, just by the gut feeling in his stomach.
And right there and then as he lay beside Kris pondering their future together, he couldn’t help having a sinking feeling that troubles were ahead, big time.
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