Comments | alien_writings: I Prefer the Mind Control Rewrite

alien_writings

I Prefer the Mind Control Rewrite - Chapter 16

Jan 18, 2013 16:39

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“Dylan, you are incredibly stupid,” Preston muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

( It was Saturday afternoon, and we were in our room, talking things out, or trying to. )

pairing: xan/dylan, character: xan, character: preston, character: dylan, 500themes, series: i prefer the mind control, pov: dylan

Comments 4

theun4givables January 19 2013, 01:24:21 UTC

Man, I just kinda feel bad for all three of them. I feel bad for Preston, because he's still so obviously in love with Dylan. I feel bad for Dylan, because he knows what he SHOULD want and yet, he wants something else. And doesn't feel like he fits in with his own people. And then there's Xan, who kinda desperately wants to make things work with Dylan in some way, yet doesn't know how because well, he's Xan.

It's just one giant ball of clusterfuck and I hope they solve their individual issues eventually.

alien_writings January 19 2013, 13:08:59 UTC

It's just one giant ball of clusterfuck

Yes, yes it is.

Why do my characters so often end up being so dysfunctional? lol

n3m3sis43 January 20 2013, 04:22:24 UTC

I still feel really bad for Preston, but I'm proud of Dylan for admitting to himself that Earth wasn't the problem and that his issues are internal. Not the poly part - a person's sexuality doesn't make them broken, like you said in this chapter. But he does have deep emotional issues and I'm glad he's acknowledging them and the fact that running off to Zimara isn't just going to make them go away.

Also, Xan did show a good bit of personality here. I liked that he actually got mad and said, "hey, fucker, if you're calling your sexually stupid then you're basically insulting my whole people. Ever think about that?"

In this version, I really do feel like Xan and Dylan have some depth as a couple. Even though their relationship so far has been based on mostly sexual attraction, Xan obviously has cared for Dylan all along and has done things to show that, even if some of them were a bit misguided. The fact that some of them were misguided makes him feel more real as a character. And the fact that he and Dylan were able to discuss ( ... )

alien_writings January 20 2013, 11:24:32 UTC

I'm glad Dylan showed actual insight, too. I'm not entirely sure how he came upon such insight, but I'm glad he finally realized you can't "run away from your brain," so to speak.

More and more, I'm glad I decided to rewrite the whole thing, because the characters are showing actual depth as people this time. I was so happy with Xan when he called Dylan out for insulting his, and by extension Xan's entire people's sexuality. Xan! Having actual emotions!

He and Dylan are definitely a more compelling couple this time (at least to me lol), even if I am not 100% sure they'll end up together because damned if I know where this story is going. While Xan's behavior has been assy and even his "good" actions have sometimes been misguided, that is a good thing, isn't it? Because it does make him a more "real" character. Actual people IRL can be assholes and often do misguided things when trying to help those they care about.