FIC (B/F): Chutes & Ladders (2/?)
Part 1: Saturday
After a hurried phone call to Giles and some frantic changing of clothes, the three girls trooped into Sunnydale High’s library. Xander was already seated at the table. “On a Saturday?” He cried accusingly, upon setting eyes on them. “Is it the end of the world? Because that’s the only reason we should be in school on Saturday.” Beside him, Giles sighed and rubbed his forehead vigorously. He had clearly been subjected to Xander’s opinion on Saturday meetings for too long.
The librarian gazed up at them and addressed Buffy. “I’m afraid Xander is correct in his assumption that it would be the end of the world before you’d give up your Saturday. You said it was a matter of some urgency?”
“Actually what I said was ‘Giles! Meeting! Now! Bring donuts!’” Buffy repeated her earlier statement.
Willow peered over her shoulder. “I don’t see any donuts.” She whined.
Giles gestured vaguely toward the counter, where a box of donuts sat open, minus two jellies which had mysteriously disappeared. Faith snagged a glazed, and settled next to Xander at the table. She chewed her first bite with less than her usual enthusiasm before answering Giles’s inquiry. “Something’s wrong with me.”
Giles looked surprised. “What do you mean?”
Buffy interrupted, her face concerned. “She was tired on patrol, and kind of clumsy. This morning she tried to hit me and it might as well have been Xander for how much effect it had.”
The aforementioned male frowned at her. “Thanks, Buff.”
She waived at him apologetically. “Something’s wrong with Faith’s powers, Giles. We have to figure out what it is.”
“Yes, well.” The watcher cleared his throat and stood up. “I’m sure it’ll work itself out.”
Faith’s chewing slowed, and she turned her gaze toward the tabletop. Why had she let Buffy talk her into coming to see Giles? He didn’t give a damn about what was going wrong with her. If it were Buffy, then he’d care. Would probably call an immediate research meeting and lay her on his couch fluffed up on pillows.
“What?” Buffy cried incredulously. “Giles, you’re not listening to me. Faith’s strength is gone. It’s like she’s a normal human.”
“She’s probably just a little sick, Buffy.” He said reassuringly.
“Thought slayers don’t get sick.” Faith interjected, trying but not quite succeeding to mask the concern in her voice.
Giles again looked unconcerned, rising from the table to help himself to a donut. “Usually that’s the case, but of course slayers are still human; it’s possible to become ill. It’s likely just a case of the flu. Buffy, you remember you had the flu once.”
“Yeah,” Buffy conceded reluctantly. “But this is different than with Der Kerouac.”
“Der Kindestod.” Giles corrected absently.
Ignoring her mistake, the slayer stared at her watcher in concern. “Giles, this is serious. Faith doesn’t have a fever and a sore throat. Her power is gone. She isn’t sick. It’s something else.”
Faith nodded in agreement. “I still feel like me, I guess. But my strength is gone and even my balance is shot.”
“Something’s draining your mojo!” Willow offered sympathetically. “A slayer mojo draining… flu.” She paused. “Oh! Or demon.” Looking at Giles, “Could it be a demon?”
Giles nodded reluctantly. “I guess it’s possible.”
“Research?” To her credit, Buffy managed to keep the utter lack of enthusiasm from being overly obvious.
“No, that’s alright!” Giles assured them quickly. “I’ll tell you what; I will reach out to some contacts in the council, see if they’ve heard of anything like this before. Give me a few days and I’ll have an answer for you.”
“Thank you!” Buffy said, relieved.
“Yeah,” Faith muttered angrily. “A few days doesn’t matter, right? Some vamp guts me, who cares? I’m just the backup slayer, right?”
Giles frowned. “Of course not, Faith.”
Buffy gaped at her fellow slayer in dismay before walking over to stand behind her chair in solidarity. “No one thinks that.” She murmured quietly. “Giles will find out what’s going on.”
“I will.” The librarian vowed. “In the meantime, be very careful on patrol. In fact, Faith, you may want to skip patrol all together.” He smiled kindly. “Stay home and get some rest.”
Faith’s boots hit the floor hard as she ungracefully stood up to protest. “Not happenin’, G.”
Buffy looked at her sympathetically. She couldn’t imagine how it must feel to suddenly be normal again, after having experienced being a slayer. “It’s okay, Giles. We’ll be fine.”
“Will and I will go too,” Xander offered. “Give you some extra back up.”
Faith arched her eyebrow skeptically. “Sure, we need somebody to hide until it’s over, you’re our man.”
“I’m your man.” Xander nodded happily. “Hey, wait!”
Smiling at them, Buffy turned back to her watcher. “See Giles, we’ve got it covered.”
“Alright.” He said worriedly.
“Now that that’s settled, maybe Faith should stay with someone until this is sorted out?” Xander suggested, obviously thinking of his own house.
“No need.” Faith replied coolly. “I’ve been on my own before, even without slayer powers. Don’t need a babysitter.”
Buffy stepped a little closer to Faith. “You sure? Because you could stay with me.”
“Yeah, B. I’ll be fine.” Faith glowered.
“Xander may be right.” Giles looked as though this admission pained him grievously.
“Thank you!” Xander beamed.
Inclining his head to Xander, the watcher continued. “Better play it smart and stick together in case this is the work of a demon.” He turned to a displeased Faith, who was glaring at Buffy. “Faith, err, would that be alright?”
Shaking her head already, the dark slayer released a long suffering sigh. “Whatever.”
“Good!” Buffy chirped brightly. “Then it’s settled. Faith, let’s go by your place and grab some stuff. Like pajamas.” She finished pointedly. The blonde slayer’s face fell when her counterpart gave her a half hearted smirk and made a quick exit from the library.
Buffy watched her go, and then turned her watcher. “We have to find out what’s going on, Giles. You know Faith; she won’t back down from a fight. She’s going to get hurt.”
Giles looked uncomfortable but quickly agreed. “I will do some checking with the council, Buffy. I’m sure by next week Faith will be just fine.”
“Okay,” Buffy said, unconvinced, but managed to smile at her two best friends. “See you guys tonight?”
“Yep, we’ll be there.” Xander confirmed.
“And ready to slay!” Willow agreed.
Smiling indulgently back at them, Buffy clarified, “Well, maybe just ready to run away in case of baddies.”
“That too.” The redhead smiled. She walked over and linked her arm with Buffy’s. “Come on, let’s see where Faith got to.”
“Actually, Will,” Buffy smiled apologetically. “Do you mind if I handle this alone, and just meet you guys later?”
“Oh,” Willow said, trying not to sound disappointed. “Sure, it’s kind of a slayer thing anyway. We’ll meet you later.”
“Thanks.” Buffy patted her arm and then headed out of the library. She picked up her pace into a light jog as she left the main school building. Faith, of course, had not gotten very far. Buffy dropped into a walk beside her, leaning over to casually bump her shoulder against the other girl’s. “Hey,” She murmured.
The brunette gave her a head dip and continued in the direction of her apartment. They walked in silence for a while. Buffy wasn’t sure what she could possibly say that was going to make Faith feel any better. The other slayer was always excited to go on patrol. She seemed to have an innate love of the hunt that Buffy wasn’t sure she herself had experienced. To her, slaying was a chore. Something to fit in between school, friends, and sneaking away for smoochies with Angel. Angel. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, trying to stop the tightness she felt deep in her chest. This was not a good time to think about Angel and start wallowing. Faith was dealing with… Whatever it was they were dealing with.
Buffy glanced at Faith’s solemn expression from the corner of her eye. “You’re not the back-up slayer, you know.” When the brunette didn’t respond, she cleared her throat nervously. “I, umm, I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re dealing with here. But whatever is causing this, we’ll figure it out. You’re one of us now, Faith.” In lieu of a response, the dark slayer kept plodding along, her face blank. Buffy sighed. “Which of course you would know from how I’ve been such a great friend since you got here.” She muttered under her breath. “But what I’m trying to say is that I wanna be here now. If you wanna talk or anything.” When she finished, Buffy reached out to grab Faith’s arm impatiently. “So do you?” She asked, as Faith stopped and looked at her in confusion.
“Do I what?”
“Want to talk.”
“About what?”
Exasperated, Buffy sighed. “About you know, what’s going on.” She gestured loosely into the air between them and looked earnestly into the other girl’s eyes. “I know you probably think I don’t care about you. Because of everything with Angel and well… I don’t know, just everything. But, Faith, I do. I guess I was just… Surprised maybe. By you coming here and by you being so… Faith.” Buffy smiled gently. “But I think once we deal with all of this stuff, well, we could have a really great thing going on here. I mean, two slayers, how awesome is that?” The blonde slayer stopped rambling and beamed at her counterpart, satisfied that she had gotten her point across.
The confusion in Faith’s face slowly melted into a look of surprised excitement. She stepped a little closer to the shorter girl and tentatively brought her hands up to rest on Buffy’s biceps. Faith squeezed tentatively. “B, I, uh,” She stammered. “Shit. I don’t really know if I can do that. I mean I’ve never really tried.” She bit her lip and a small smile escaped around her gleaming white teeth.
“Oh,” Buffy’s smile faltered. Faith didn’t have friends wherever she came from? And wasn’t sure if she could have one now?
“Don’t look like that,” Faith said quietly. “Didn’t know you wanted it to be like that, B…” She trailed off, unsure how to finish. Instead she cursed softly under her breath, and yanked Buffy in close to her. The stunned slayer let out a small grunt of surprise when Faith’s mouth suddenly covered hers in a tentative kiss.
Buffy was not immediately clear on what was happening. Instead her brain took a long moment to process the event. She was being kissed. By Faith. Who was a slayer. And also a girl. A girl was kissing her. Faith was kissing her. And Buffy was kissing back? She opened her eyes in alarm and gently put her hands to Faith’s hips, planning to push her away.
When Faith felt Buffy’s small hands land clumsily against her sides, she smiled against the other girl’s lips and stepped closer. One hand slid around to the back of her waist and pulled their hips flush together. The other snaked upward to cup Buffy’s cheek carefully.
Shit, Buffy thought, as her stomach pressed into Faith’s. What was happening here? She gripped Faith’s waist harder, intending to pull away from her. Before she could, Faith released her, her right hand joining its mate at Buffy’s hips. Their faces remained closed together, Buffy’s surprised hazel eyes staring back into Faith’s pleased brown gaze. “Been wanting to do that for a long time,” Faith quietly confessed, her flushed cheeks glowing.
“Oh,” Said Buffy awkwardly.
“Yeah,” Muttered Faith, starting to realize something wasn’t right about this situation. She took a large step back from Buffy, who quickly averted her eyes and started walking again.
“Guess we should keep moving.” The blonde mumbled.
Flushing angrily, Faith put some speed into her walk and tried bypassing the other slayer. “Look, I’ll just meet you on patrol later.”
“Huh?” Buffy matched pace with her easily. “Are you sure?”
The dark slayer rolled her eyes. “Yeah. I need a little break from movie watching and powwows with the A Team.”
“Oh,” Replied Buffy, hurt. “Okay.”
“See ya.” Faith jerked her head in Buffy’s direction and then kept moving toward her motel as the other slayer slowed to a halt behind her. As she neared the motel, the brunette could feel herself getting angrier and angrier. What the fuck had she been thinking, kissing Buffy? Yeah, B had said she wanted Faith. Had said they’d had something great even. But then as soon as she acted on it, the prim and proper little slayer acted embarrassed it had even happened. She should have known Buffy wouldn’t handle this shit. Probably thinking about her fucking vampire the whole time, Faith thought bitterly. Buffy could give it up to a dead demon, but just kissing Faith was enough to completely repulse her. The slayer rolled her eyes as she strode up to her door, angrily jamming the key into the flimsy lock. Once the door was safely closed behind her, she raked frustrated fingers through her messy hair. I can’t believe I have to spend the whole night with her.
I can’t believe I have to spend the night with her. Buffy thought anxiously, as she and Faith walked into her house later that night. As promised, Faith had been aggressively stomping around their first cemetery of the night when Buffy arrived with the Scoobs in tow. Willow and Xander had been clearly uncomfortable with the tense silence between the slayers, and the patrol was heavier on the danger, lighter on the banter than it usually was when the gang was together. Now patrol was finished and the two slayers were retiring to Buffy’s house, much to Faith’s obvious resentment.
They climbed the stairs together in silence and Buffy paused as they entered her room. She eyed her double bed speculatively. “I can sleep on the floor,” She offered feebly, her cheeks flushing red.
“Don’t worry, B.” The other slayer sneered back at her cruelly. “I won’t touch you.”
“I wasn’t saying that.” Buffy stammered. Great job, Buffy. Make her feel like a freak.
Rolling her eyes, Faith crossed the room and put her bag down to begin rifling through it.
Feeling upset herself, Buffy huffed and grabbed her pajamas from where she’d discarded them this morning, stomping out of her room and to the bathroom. Who did Faith think she was? Out of nowhere, the other slayer had grabbed and kissed her and then she acted put out that Buffy wasn’t into it? And she’d said she didn’t even want to be friends either!
Buffy stripped off her clothes angrily, leaving a thin coating of vampire dust over the bathroom rug. Suddenly she froze, one leg still tangled in her jeans. Oh, God. Faith had thought she was saying-Oh, God. Oh, God. The other slayer thought Buffy was hitting on her! The air seemed to move around her and she grabbed the countertop as she realized she was falling sideways over her crumpled pile of denim. Struggling out of her pants, the slayer began pulling on her pajamas robotically. She paused again, this time while pasting her toothbrush. Faith thought Buffy was hitting on her, and her reaction was to kiss her. So…
Oh.
Oh.
Faith liked her? Like a light bulb had suddenly illuminated her brain, Buffy’s memories started to fit together in a now complete puzzle. Faith asking her to go to Homecoming together. Faith’s fingers entwining with hers on the dance floor at the Bronze. Faith’s eyes flicking her up and down when they met for patrol at night. The quick tempo of her heartbeat whenever Buffy pinned her during sparring.
A light knock on the bathroom door startled her and she squeezed a huge glob of toothpaste out onto the counter. “Crap!” She muttered. “Uh, yeah? I mean, come in.”
Joyce peered through the doorframe at her. “Hi, honey.”
“Oh.” Buffy smiled. “Hey, mom. Did we wake you up?”
“No, just wanted a drink of water.” Her mother entered and smiled softly while smoothing her hand over Buffy’s rumpled hair. “How was patrol?”
“Okay.” Buffy shrugged noncommittally, grabbing some tissues to wipe up the streak of toothpaste she’d left behind.
“And Faith’s sleeping over?”
“Mhmm.” Buffy pasted her brush again, more carefully this time.
“No fooling around tonight, okay?”
The tube jerked in her hand and a line of toothpaste bypassed her brush to land in the sink. “What?” Buffy stammered. “Mom, we’re not-I mean, it’s not like that.”
Joyce finished filling her glass with cool water and gave her daughter a long suffering look. “Every time you girls start sparring in the house, something gets broken! I’d like to just go one week without replacing any of the furniture.”
“Oh,” Buffy was relieved. “Sure, no sparring.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” Buffy smiled broadly when her mother patted her arm affectionately.
“Okay. Goodnight, baby.”
“Night, Mom.” Closing the door behind her mom, Buffy quickly ran through the rest of her before bed routine. She would talk to Faith when she got back to the bedroom. They’d straighten this out and then get back to, well, whatever they usually did. Buffy gathered her dirty clothes into her arms and tossed them into the hamper. She made her way quietly back to her bedroom, careful not to disturb Joyce.
Inside, Faith lay curled on one side of the bed. She wore the pajamas Buffy had leant her the night before. The anger simmering in her blood all night had faded. Truth be told, she wasn’t even thinking about Buffy Summers and the mind fuck she’d pulled on her earlier that night. Something was very seriously wrong with her, she knew that now. Patrol had been slow, but even with that, she felt exhausted. The cuts on her knuckles she’d gotten from waling on some newbie in Restfield had already healed, but her thoughts lingered on how much her hands had hurt when she was doing the punching. And it had barely affected the vamp! If Xander hadn’t chosen that moment to appear behind him with a stake and miraculously pierce the demon’s heart, he would probably have overpowered her.
Faith loved being a slayer. She loved feeling strong and kicking ass. And she loved that, for the first time in her life, she felt like she was doing something. Like all the times teachers had seen her unwashed face or her too small clothing and looked at her with pity were behind her. She didn’t care anymore about the times the cops would show up and chase her and the other kids like her off the corners at night, whipping out at their thin limbs with their nightclubs and telling them to get lost like so much trash. She was better than that now. There was one slayer in the world, and she was it. Until of course she found out there were two. Still, two was not such a bad number. Depending on who your number two was.
But what if whoever picked the slayers realized they got it wrong with her? This could just be them fixing their mistake. If she wasn’t a slayer, she’d go back to being some forgotten kid with an absentee parent whose cocky mouth had gotten her into more scraps than she cared to remember.
The bed dipped behind her as Buffy settled herself in on the other side of the bed. The blonde sighed heavily like maybe she wanted to start a conversation. Faith realized in dim horror that hot tears had started to slide down her cheeks. She froze, willing her breath steady and squeezing her eyes shut in an attempt to keep any and all moisture from escaping. Faith absolutely hated to cry. Whenever she felt even the slightest prick of tears under her eyelids, she’d head right out and find a distraction. A man, a fight, a bottle of Jack, whatever it took to take her away from herself. But here she was, trapped in Buffy fucking Summers’s bed and starting to cry like a fucking girl. The dark slayer forced herself to calm down. She’d be damned if she’d let Buffy know she was crying. The day had been bad enough without adding this to it. Unfortunately, she discovered that her shoulder had betrayed her and was trembling when she heard the blonde’s startled intake of breath behind her.
“Faith,” Buffy called gently and scooted closer to into her personal space. Buffy’s warm palm skated hesitantly onto her shoulder. Faith ignored her and ordered herself to stop crying. Her chest swelled with anger when she felt a low sob start to build in her throat. “Oh, Faith,” Buffy whispered, “Com’ere.” The dark slayer tried to resist, but Buffy’s strength pulled hard against her shoulder until she had to relent and drop onto her back. Firm fingers reached for her right shoulder and tried to pull her forward so the two slayers would face together. Faith let her body go dead weight. She didn’t need Buffy’s pity.
“Leave me alone.” She muttered.
Buffy looked pained and she stopped trying to pull the other girl toward her. “I can’t do that.” She replied quietly. But she didn’t resume her struggle to turn the brunette’s body. Instead she settled for leaving her left hand tucked in the crook of Faith’s elbow. Letting her head drop onto the pillow next to the other girl’s, she laid there silently.
Faith desperately wished she were anywhere else in the world. As a child, she’d learned quickly that crying solved nothing. Her mother never came to hold her, never cradled her or rocked her or even told her she was okay. No hands ever reached to push her damp hair from her face or smooth down her back comfortingly. So she’d learned not to bother crying. She’d learned that the less you expect from people the better off you’d be. They were by and large assholes who were only interested in themselves, and the less weakness you showed in front of them, the better.
Diana had been different. Her general British stuffiness was there, like with any watcher, but when Faith had done a particularly skilled move in training, or had said something that amused her, Diana’s delicate hand would briefly land on her shoulder, each squeeze a congratulation, each pat a sign of her pride in Faith. The time she’d lived with Diana had been the only time in her life that Faith had ever felt like she’d belonged anywhere. Or that anyone cared for her. But now Diana was gone. She’d been ripped to pieces by Kakistos while the terrified new slayer could not save her. Diana was gone and Faith was left with nothing, all over again.
Thinking about her failure to save her watcher really wasn’t helping the situation. The sounds of Faith’s muffled crying filled the room and she brushed off Buffy’s hand to impatiently wipe the tears off her face. It was then that she saw in the moonlight the glint of tears tracking down Buffy’s face. Faith covered her face with both palms. She didn’t know how to do this. If Diana had been the one witnessing this pathetic breakdown maybe it would be different…
She’s dead. Faith’s inner monologue was furious. You let her die. Her chest ached as she swallowed hard over the lump in her throat. She had no watcher, no family, not one fucking person in the entire fucking world who gave a shit about her. Even the council who should have cared hadn’t bothered to assign her a new watcher. And it was so obvious that Giles thought of her as the expendable slayer. It was like she was right back where she was before Diana had found her. Except… Now she lay in the darkness with Buffy crying quietly into wayward strands of Faith’s hair. The other slayer was holding onto her arm and she was crying, because Faith was hurt. Maybe B wasn’t just blowing smoke up her ass with all that talk about being able to trust her. The brunette felt a louder sob bubble in her throat, and this time when Buffy’s strong arm snaked across her and pulled forward, Faith let herself be moved. As the blonde slid both arms around her and pulled her in close, the dark slayer’s sobs increased to the point where they were almost screams. Her arms folded around Buffy’s tiny waist, fists knotting in her pajama top.
“Okay,” Buffy whispered, smoothing her hair back from her hot face. “It’s okay, Faith, it’s okay.”
Faith’s headshake was frantic, her tears soaking into Buffy’s shirt and leaving her skin hot and sticky.
Unsure what to do, Buffy just held on as the other girl shook in her arms. Faith’s broken cries eventually trailed off, but she remained in Buffy’s arms, her head tucked beneath the blonde’s chin. “Gotta get ‘em back.” She muttered finally, as if to herself.
“We will.”
“Gotta get ‘em back.” Faith repeated, her voice hoarse. “If I’m not a slayer anymore, I’m just… Nothing.”
“That’s not true.” Buffy protested, shocked.
“Yes, it is.”
“Faith,” The blonde said, and she pulled back so she could peer into the other girl’s face. “We will get your powers back. I promise you.”
The brunette gave an unconvinced nod and pulled backward out of Buffy’s hold. Once free she rolled to face the wall, putting more distance between the two of them.
Buffy stared at Faith’s back. The other girl was taking deep, calming breaths now. This was obviously not the time to talk about what had happened earlier, no matter how much Buffy suddenly wanted to. But maybe Faith wouldn’t mind answering just a few questions… No. Faith’s upset. This can wait. But the blonde was so curious now, even though she wasn’t sure she was ready to face the answers Faith would give. I’m not going to bring it up. I won’t bring it up. “Faith?” She asked. Maybe just one question.
“What?”
“Today when you, uh, kissed me--”
“Look, it won’t happen again. Can you just drop it?” Faith coughed to hide the fact that she was still sniffling.
Buffy flushed. “I didn’t know you were gay.”
Faith muttered darkly. “I’m not.”
“But you kissed me.” Buffy repeated vacantly.
“Look, it’s just you, okay?”
“What does that mean?”
“It means,” Faith began loudly, then paused and lowered her voice. “It means you just make it like this for me, okay?”
“Oh,” Said Buffy, not really understanding. Faith didn’t like girls? Because she’d definitely seemed to like girls earlier. The other slayer’s hands had been confident as they pulled her in closer, holding her back like they were made to fit there. “Faith?”
“What?” She practically barked.
Buffy gazed timidly at the back of her bedmate’s head. “I just wanted to know how long.”
Faith rolled to face her, irritation plain in her movements. “How long what?”
“How long you wanted to do it for?”
The dark slayer sighed. “I don’t know. Maybe since Kakistos.”
“Oh.” Very intelligent reply, Buffy. She scolded herself. This conversation was not going as smoothly as she’d planned. Somehow she had to tell Faith that she wasn’t interested. Flattered yes, interested no. The other slayer had pointedly closed her eyes now but even as she feigned sleep, her face was guarded. Tension was evident in her brow and her shoulders were stiff. The dark slayer almost always looked defensive, Buffy realized. Except for earlier today. That had been the only time she’d ever seen Faith look truly open or relaxed. The expression on her face after they’d kissed. Faith had been… Well, happy. The brunette’s usual smile was bold and sharp, beautiful but cold. The one tonight had been different. It wasn’t so wide as usual, more like a soft sweep of her lips upward. Only a bare hint of her teeth were displayed and her eyes were wide with undisguised pleasure. Buffy liked that smile. It seemed like maybe that was the real Faith, hidden under layers of eyeliner and diamond smiles.
And it wasn’t as though the kiss had been bad exactly. “How about now?” She blurted out, surprising herself.
Faith lazily opened her eyes. “Huh?”
“Do you want to kiss me now?” Buffy clarified, suddenly feeling nervous. What am I doing?
Faith stared back at her for a long moment. Then she nodded, a muscle in her jaw ticking.
“Okay,” Buffy breathed out, and she slid a little closer to where the dark slayer was lying.
Lying perfectly still, Faith felt her heartbeat start to speed up. She wondered if Buffy’s slayer senses could pick that up. Probably. Fuck. Be cool, Lehane. She’s just a chick. The other slayer’s soft mouth pressed in on hers experimentally. Faith’s eyes fluttered shut as she sank forward, trying to keep her movements slow enough not to alarm the other girl.
Oh my God. Buffy was experiencing a surge of butterflies in her belly as she leaned in, pressing more confidently into Faith’s full lips. Maybe not butterflies. It was something bigger, like maybe pelicans. Pelicans setting off for a transatlantic flight in her stomach.
Her palms practically itched to slide over Buffy’s soft skin and meet on the smooth muscle of her back but Faith managed to keep still. She had no idea why she was letting this happen again. In the morning B would probably act all goody goody hetero super slayer and Faith would be just as pissed as she’d been earlier that day. But Jesus, it was Buffy and what else could she do? Her patience was rewarded when the other slayer’s warm fingers slid into the gap between Faith’s arm and her side, and rested lightly against her back. With a muffled moan, the dark slayer grabbed the other girl and pulled their bodies flush. She was expecting to vie for dominance with Buffy, but was pleasantly surprised when her peach lips parted under Faith’s gently probing tongue.
She exhaled hard when Faith’s quick tongue darted against hers, faint traces of cherry lip gloss flavoring the kiss. Buffy’s free hand made its way to Faith’s dark hair, winding in and pulling the other girl closer. The slayer realized with surprise that she was smiling against Faith’s mouth. She liked this. A lot. The thought might have been more alarming, but simultaneously she became aware that her breasts were pressing into Faith’s scantily covered chest. “Mmm.” She tugged hard on the other girl’s hips, bringing them into hard contact with hers.
“Wow.” Faith gasped, pulling back a little bit. “Trying to start something, B?”
“No.” Buffy assured her nervously. Like what? No, no. She wasn’t trying to start something. An hour ago she had been thinking of how to let Faith down easily. And now they were making out somewhat frantically in her bed. Faith thought she was ready to start something? “No.” She repeated firmly.
The flicker of panic across her fellow slayer’s face made Faith’s stomach clench in disappointment. Stupid. Fucking stupid. Again, for the second time in one day she’d let Buffy play games with her. “Yeah,” She muttered, extracted herself fully from the other girl. “Okay.”
Watching her retreat, Buffy felt hurt. Apparently Faith didn’t wanna kiss her unless she was going to get something more out of it. Angel had never been like that. Her heart seized. Angel. He’d hardly left Sunnydale and here she was making out with Faith. Faith of all people, who’d tried to kill him. She blinked hard, wiped her palm down her suddenly tired face. This was a disaster. Rolling away, she turned her back to face Faith’s. It was a long time before she could fall asleep.
-------------------------------
I hope you all enjoyed this installment. Please leave me any thoughts or comments you might have. I'm particularly interested to know what you thought about Faith crying. A couple people commented on how they were liking bad ass Faith, so I hope I didn't ruin her image with that scene! I toyed with idea of taking it out, but ultimately I liked it and decided to keep it. But I'd still be interested in your thoughts.
The next installment is about a third of the way completed, and I like how it's coming along so far. I'm hoping to get that out to you next week, assuming real life doesn't get in the way.
Continue to the next part...
After a hurried phone call to Giles and some frantic changing of clothes, the three girls trooped into Sunnydale High’s library. Xander was already seated at the table. “On a Saturday?” He cried accusingly, upon setting eyes on them. “Is it the end of the world? Because that’s the only reason we should be in school on Saturday.” Beside him, Giles sighed and rubbed his forehead vigorously. He had clearly been subjected to Xander’s opinion on Saturday meetings for too long.
The librarian gazed up at them and addressed Buffy. “I’m afraid Xander is correct in his assumption that it would be the end of the world before you’d give up your Saturday. You said it was a matter of some urgency?”
“Actually what I said was ‘Giles! Meeting! Now! Bring donuts!’” Buffy repeated her earlier statement.
Willow peered over her shoulder. “I don’t see any donuts.” She whined.
Giles gestured vaguely toward the counter, where a box of donuts sat open, minus two jellies which had mysteriously disappeared. Faith snagged a glazed, and settled next to Xander at the table. She chewed her first bite with less than her usual enthusiasm before answering Giles’s inquiry. “Something’s wrong with me.”
Giles looked surprised. “What do you mean?”
Buffy interrupted, her face concerned. “She was tired on patrol, and kind of clumsy. This morning she tried to hit me and it might as well have been Xander for how much effect it had.”
The aforementioned male frowned at her. “Thanks, Buff.”
She waived at him apologetically. “Something’s wrong with Faith’s powers, Giles. We have to figure out what it is.”
“Yes, well.” The watcher cleared his throat and stood up. “I’m sure it’ll work itself out.”
Faith’s chewing slowed, and she turned her gaze toward the tabletop. Why had she let Buffy talk her into coming to see Giles? He didn’t give a damn about what was going wrong with her. If it were Buffy, then he’d care. Would probably call an immediate research meeting and lay her on his couch fluffed up on pillows.
“What?” Buffy cried incredulously. “Giles, you’re not listening to me. Faith’s strength is gone. It’s like she’s a normal human.”
“She’s probably just a little sick, Buffy.” He said reassuringly.
“Thought slayers don’t get sick.” Faith interjected, trying but not quite succeeding to mask the concern in her voice.
Giles again looked unconcerned, rising from the table to help himself to a donut. “Usually that’s the case, but of course slayers are still human; it’s possible to become ill. It’s likely just a case of the flu. Buffy, you remember you had the flu once.”
“Yeah,” Buffy conceded reluctantly. “But this is different than with Der Kerouac.”
“Der Kindestod.” Giles corrected absently.
Ignoring her mistake, the slayer stared at her watcher in concern. “Giles, this is serious. Faith doesn’t have a fever and a sore throat. Her power is gone. She isn’t sick. It’s something else.”
Faith nodded in agreement. “I still feel like me, I guess. But my strength is gone and even my balance is shot.”
“Something’s draining your mojo!” Willow offered sympathetically. “A slayer mojo draining… flu.” She paused. “Oh! Or demon.” Looking at Giles, “Could it be a demon?”
Giles nodded reluctantly. “I guess it’s possible.”
“Research?” To her credit, Buffy managed to keep the utter lack of enthusiasm from being overly obvious.
“No, that’s alright!” Giles assured them quickly. “I’ll tell you what; I will reach out to some contacts in the council, see if they’ve heard of anything like this before. Give me a few days and I’ll have an answer for you.”
“Thank you!” Buffy said, relieved.
“Yeah,” Faith muttered angrily. “A few days doesn’t matter, right? Some vamp guts me, who cares? I’m just the backup slayer, right?”
Giles frowned. “Of course not, Faith.”
Buffy gaped at her fellow slayer in dismay before walking over to stand behind her chair in solidarity. “No one thinks that.” She murmured quietly. “Giles will find out what’s going on.”
“I will.” The librarian vowed. “In the meantime, be very careful on patrol. In fact, Faith, you may want to skip patrol all together.” He smiled kindly. “Stay home and get some rest.”
Faith’s boots hit the floor hard as she ungracefully stood up to protest. “Not happenin’, G.”
Buffy looked at her sympathetically. She couldn’t imagine how it must feel to suddenly be normal again, after having experienced being a slayer. “It’s okay, Giles. We’ll be fine.”
“Will and I will go too,” Xander offered. “Give you some extra back up.”
Faith arched her eyebrow skeptically. “Sure, we need somebody to hide until it’s over, you’re our man.”
“I’m your man.” Xander nodded happily. “Hey, wait!”
Smiling at them, Buffy turned back to her watcher. “See Giles, we’ve got it covered.”
“Alright.” He said worriedly.
“Now that that’s settled, maybe Faith should stay with someone until this is sorted out?” Xander suggested, obviously thinking of his own house.
“No need.” Faith replied coolly. “I’ve been on my own before, even without slayer powers. Don’t need a babysitter.”
Buffy stepped a little closer to Faith. “You sure? Because you could stay with me.”
“Yeah, B. I’ll be fine.” Faith glowered.
“Xander may be right.” Giles looked as though this admission pained him grievously.
“Thank you!” Xander beamed.
Inclining his head to Xander, the watcher continued. “Better play it smart and stick together in case this is the work of a demon.” He turned to a displeased Faith, who was glaring at Buffy. “Faith, err, would that be alright?”
Shaking her head already, the dark slayer released a long suffering sigh. “Whatever.”
“Good!” Buffy chirped brightly. “Then it’s settled. Faith, let’s go by your place and grab some stuff. Like pajamas.” She finished pointedly. The blonde slayer’s face fell when her counterpart gave her a half hearted smirk and made a quick exit from the library.
Buffy watched her go, and then turned her watcher. “We have to find out what’s going on, Giles. You know Faith; she won’t back down from a fight. She’s going to get hurt.”
Giles looked uncomfortable but quickly agreed. “I will do some checking with the council, Buffy. I’m sure by next week Faith will be just fine.”
“Okay,” Buffy said, unconvinced, but managed to smile at her two best friends. “See you guys tonight?”
“Yep, we’ll be there.” Xander confirmed.
“And ready to slay!” Willow agreed.
Smiling indulgently back at them, Buffy clarified, “Well, maybe just ready to run away in case of baddies.”
“That too.” The redhead smiled. She walked over and linked her arm with Buffy’s. “Come on, let’s see where Faith got to.”
“Actually, Will,” Buffy smiled apologetically. “Do you mind if I handle this alone, and just meet you guys later?”
“Oh,” Willow said, trying not to sound disappointed. “Sure, it’s kind of a slayer thing anyway. We’ll meet you later.”
“Thanks.” Buffy patted her arm and then headed out of the library. She picked up her pace into a light jog as she left the main school building. Faith, of course, had not gotten very far. Buffy dropped into a walk beside her, leaning over to casually bump her shoulder against the other girl’s. “Hey,” She murmured.
The brunette gave her a head dip and continued in the direction of her apartment. They walked in silence for a while. Buffy wasn’t sure what she could possibly say that was going to make Faith feel any better. The other slayer was always excited to go on patrol. She seemed to have an innate love of the hunt that Buffy wasn’t sure she herself had experienced. To her, slaying was a chore. Something to fit in between school, friends, and sneaking away for smoochies with Angel. Angel. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, trying to stop the tightness she felt deep in her chest. This was not a good time to think about Angel and start wallowing. Faith was dealing with… Whatever it was they were dealing with.
Buffy glanced at Faith’s solemn expression from the corner of her eye. “You’re not the back-up slayer, you know.” When the brunette didn’t respond, she cleared her throat nervously. “I, umm, I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re dealing with here. But whatever is causing this, we’ll figure it out. You’re one of us now, Faith.” In lieu of a response, the dark slayer kept plodding along, her face blank. Buffy sighed. “Which of course you would know from how I’ve been such a great friend since you got here.” She muttered under her breath. “But what I’m trying to say is that I wanna be here now. If you wanna talk or anything.” When she finished, Buffy reached out to grab Faith’s arm impatiently. “So do you?” She asked, as Faith stopped and looked at her in confusion.
“Do I what?”
“Want to talk.”
“About what?”
Exasperated, Buffy sighed. “About you know, what’s going on.” She gestured loosely into the air between them and looked earnestly into the other girl’s eyes. “I know you probably think I don’t care about you. Because of everything with Angel and well… I don’t know, just everything. But, Faith, I do. I guess I was just… Surprised maybe. By you coming here and by you being so… Faith.” Buffy smiled gently. “But I think once we deal with all of this stuff, well, we could have a really great thing going on here. I mean, two slayers, how awesome is that?” The blonde slayer stopped rambling and beamed at her counterpart, satisfied that she had gotten her point across.
The confusion in Faith’s face slowly melted into a look of surprised excitement. She stepped a little closer to the shorter girl and tentatively brought her hands up to rest on Buffy’s biceps. Faith squeezed tentatively. “B, I, uh,” She stammered. “Shit. I don’t really know if I can do that. I mean I’ve never really tried.” She bit her lip and a small smile escaped around her gleaming white teeth.
“Oh,” Buffy’s smile faltered. Faith didn’t have friends wherever she came from? And wasn’t sure if she could have one now?
“Don’t look like that,” Faith said quietly. “Didn’t know you wanted it to be like that, B…” She trailed off, unsure how to finish. Instead she cursed softly under her breath, and yanked Buffy in close to her. The stunned slayer let out a small grunt of surprise when Faith’s mouth suddenly covered hers in a tentative kiss.
Buffy was not immediately clear on what was happening. Instead her brain took a long moment to process the event. She was being kissed. By Faith. Who was a slayer. And also a girl. A girl was kissing her. Faith was kissing her. And Buffy was kissing back? She opened her eyes in alarm and gently put her hands to Faith’s hips, planning to push her away.
When Faith felt Buffy’s small hands land clumsily against her sides, she smiled against the other girl’s lips and stepped closer. One hand slid around to the back of her waist and pulled their hips flush together. The other snaked upward to cup Buffy’s cheek carefully.
Shit, Buffy thought, as her stomach pressed into Faith’s. What was happening here? She gripped Faith’s waist harder, intending to pull away from her. Before she could, Faith released her, her right hand joining its mate at Buffy’s hips. Their faces remained closed together, Buffy’s surprised hazel eyes staring back into Faith’s pleased brown gaze. “Been wanting to do that for a long time,” Faith quietly confessed, her flushed cheeks glowing.
“Oh,” Said Buffy awkwardly.
“Yeah,” Muttered Faith, starting to realize something wasn’t right about this situation. She took a large step back from Buffy, who quickly averted her eyes and started walking again.
“Guess we should keep moving.” The blonde mumbled.
Flushing angrily, Faith put some speed into her walk and tried bypassing the other slayer. “Look, I’ll just meet you on patrol later.”
“Huh?” Buffy matched pace with her easily. “Are you sure?”
The dark slayer rolled her eyes. “Yeah. I need a little break from movie watching and powwows with the A Team.”
“Oh,” Replied Buffy, hurt. “Okay.”
“See ya.” Faith jerked her head in Buffy’s direction and then kept moving toward her motel as the other slayer slowed to a halt behind her. As she neared the motel, the brunette could feel herself getting angrier and angrier. What the fuck had she been thinking, kissing Buffy? Yeah, B had said she wanted Faith. Had said they’d had something great even. But then as soon as she acted on it, the prim and proper little slayer acted embarrassed it had even happened. She should have known Buffy wouldn’t handle this shit. Probably thinking about her fucking vampire the whole time, Faith thought bitterly. Buffy could give it up to a dead demon, but just kissing Faith was enough to completely repulse her. The slayer rolled her eyes as she strode up to her door, angrily jamming the key into the flimsy lock. Once the door was safely closed behind her, she raked frustrated fingers through her messy hair. I can’t believe I have to spend the whole night with her.
I can’t believe I have to spend the night with her. Buffy thought anxiously, as she and Faith walked into her house later that night. As promised, Faith had been aggressively stomping around their first cemetery of the night when Buffy arrived with the Scoobs in tow. Willow and Xander had been clearly uncomfortable with the tense silence between the slayers, and the patrol was heavier on the danger, lighter on the banter than it usually was when the gang was together. Now patrol was finished and the two slayers were retiring to Buffy’s house, much to Faith’s obvious resentment.
They climbed the stairs together in silence and Buffy paused as they entered her room. She eyed her double bed speculatively. “I can sleep on the floor,” She offered feebly, her cheeks flushing red.
“Don’t worry, B.” The other slayer sneered back at her cruelly. “I won’t touch you.”
“I wasn’t saying that.” Buffy stammered. Great job, Buffy. Make her feel like a freak.
Rolling her eyes, Faith crossed the room and put her bag down to begin rifling through it.
Feeling upset herself, Buffy huffed and grabbed her pajamas from where she’d discarded them this morning, stomping out of her room and to the bathroom. Who did Faith think she was? Out of nowhere, the other slayer had grabbed and kissed her and then she acted put out that Buffy wasn’t into it? And she’d said she didn’t even want to be friends either!
Buffy stripped off her clothes angrily, leaving a thin coating of vampire dust over the bathroom rug. Suddenly she froze, one leg still tangled in her jeans. Oh, God. Faith had thought she was saying-Oh, God. Oh, God. The other slayer thought Buffy was hitting on her! The air seemed to move around her and she grabbed the countertop as she realized she was falling sideways over her crumpled pile of denim. Struggling out of her pants, the slayer began pulling on her pajamas robotically. She paused again, this time while pasting her toothbrush. Faith thought Buffy was hitting on her, and her reaction was to kiss her. So…
Oh.
Oh.
Faith liked her? Like a light bulb had suddenly illuminated her brain, Buffy’s memories started to fit together in a now complete puzzle. Faith asking her to go to Homecoming together. Faith’s fingers entwining with hers on the dance floor at the Bronze. Faith’s eyes flicking her up and down when they met for patrol at night. The quick tempo of her heartbeat whenever Buffy pinned her during sparring.
A light knock on the bathroom door startled her and she squeezed a huge glob of toothpaste out onto the counter. “Crap!” She muttered. “Uh, yeah? I mean, come in.”
Joyce peered through the doorframe at her. “Hi, honey.”
“Oh.” Buffy smiled. “Hey, mom. Did we wake you up?”
“No, just wanted a drink of water.” Her mother entered and smiled softly while smoothing her hand over Buffy’s rumpled hair. “How was patrol?”
“Okay.” Buffy shrugged noncommittally, grabbing some tissues to wipe up the streak of toothpaste she’d left behind.
“And Faith’s sleeping over?”
“Mhmm.” Buffy pasted her brush again, more carefully this time.
“No fooling around tonight, okay?”
The tube jerked in her hand and a line of toothpaste bypassed her brush to land in the sink. “What?” Buffy stammered. “Mom, we’re not-I mean, it’s not like that.”
Joyce finished filling her glass with cool water and gave her daughter a long suffering look. “Every time you girls start sparring in the house, something gets broken! I’d like to just go one week without replacing any of the furniture.”
“Oh,” Buffy was relieved. “Sure, no sparring.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” Buffy smiled broadly when her mother patted her arm affectionately.
“Okay. Goodnight, baby.”
“Night, Mom.” Closing the door behind her mom, Buffy quickly ran through the rest of her before bed routine. She would talk to Faith when she got back to the bedroom. They’d straighten this out and then get back to, well, whatever they usually did. Buffy gathered her dirty clothes into her arms and tossed them into the hamper. She made her way quietly back to her bedroom, careful not to disturb Joyce.
Inside, Faith lay curled on one side of the bed. She wore the pajamas Buffy had leant her the night before. The anger simmering in her blood all night had faded. Truth be told, she wasn’t even thinking about Buffy Summers and the mind fuck she’d pulled on her earlier that night. Something was very seriously wrong with her, she knew that now. Patrol had been slow, but even with that, she felt exhausted. The cuts on her knuckles she’d gotten from waling on some newbie in Restfield had already healed, but her thoughts lingered on how much her hands had hurt when she was doing the punching. And it had barely affected the vamp! If Xander hadn’t chosen that moment to appear behind him with a stake and miraculously pierce the demon’s heart, he would probably have overpowered her.
Faith loved being a slayer. She loved feeling strong and kicking ass. And she loved that, for the first time in her life, she felt like she was doing something. Like all the times teachers had seen her unwashed face or her too small clothing and looked at her with pity were behind her. She didn’t care anymore about the times the cops would show up and chase her and the other kids like her off the corners at night, whipping out at their thin limbs with their nightclubs and telling them to get lost like so much trash. She was better than that now. There was one slayer in the world, and she was it. Until of course she found out there were two. Still, two was not such a bad number. Depending on who your number two was.
But what if whoever picked the slayers realized they got it wrong with her? This could just be them fixing their mistake. If she wasn’t a slayer, she’d go back to being some forgotten kid with an absentee parent whose cocky mouth had gotten her into more scraps than she cared to remember.
The bed dipped behind her as Buffy settled herself in on the other side of the bed. The blonde sighed heavily like maybe she wanted to start a conversation. Faith realized in dim horror that hot tears had started to slide down her cheeks. She froze, willing her breath steady and squeezing her eyes shut in an attempt to keep any and all moisture from escaping. Faith absolutely hated to cry. Whenever she felt even the slightest prick of tears under her eyelids, she’d head right out and find a distraction. A man, a fight, a bottle of Jack, whatever it took to take her away from herself. But here she was, trapped in Buffy fucking Summers’s bed and starting to cry like a fucking girl. The dark slayer forced herself to calm down. She’d be damned if she’d let Buffy know she was crying. The day had been bad enough without adding this to it. Unfortunately, she discovered that her shoulder had betrayed her and was trembling when she heard the blonde’s startled intake of breath behind her.
“Faith,” Buffy called gently and scooted closer to into her personal space. Buffy’s warm palm skated hesitantly onto her shoulder. Faith ignored her and ordered herself to stop crying. Her chest swelled with anger when she felt a low sob start to build in her throat. “Oh, Faith,” Buffy whispered, “Com’ere.” The dark slayer tried to resist, but Buffy’s strength pulled hard against her shoulder until she had to relent and drop onto her back. Firm fingers reached for her right shoulder and tried to pull her forward so the two slayers would face together. Faith let her body go dead weight. She didn’t need Buffy’s pity.
“Leave me alone.” She muttered.
Buffy looked pained and she stopped trying to pull the other girl toward her. “I can’t do that.” She replied quietly. But she didn’t resume her struggle to turn the brunette’s body. Instead she settled for leaving her left hand tucked in the crook of Faith’s elbow. Letting her head drop onto the pillow next to the other girl’s, she laid there silently.
Faith desperately wished she were anywhere else in the world. As a child, she’d learned quickly that crying solved nothing. Her mother never came to hold her, never cradled her or rocked her or even told her she was okay. No hands ever reached to push her damp hair from her face or smooth down her back comfortingly. So she’d learned not to bother crying. She’d learned that the less you expect from people the better off you’d be. They were by and large assholes who were only interested in themselves, and the less weakness you showed in front of them, the better.
Diana had been different. Her general British stuffiness was there, like with any watcher, but when Faith had done a particularly skilled move in training, or had said something that amused her, Diana’s delicate hand would briefly land on her shoulder, each squeeze a congratulation, each pat a sign of her pride in Faith. The time she’d lived with Diana had been the only time in her life that Faith had ever felt like she’d belonged anywhere. Or that anyone cared for her. But now Diana was gone. She’d been ripped to pieces by Kakistos while the terrified new slayer could not save her. Diana was gone and Faith was left with nothing, all over again.
Thinking about her failure to save her watcher really wasn’t helping the situation. The sounds of Faith’s muffled crying filled the room and she brushed off Buffy’s hand to impatiently wipe the tears off her face. It was then that she saw in the moonlight the glint of tears tracking down Buffy’s face. Faith covered her face with both palms. She didn’t know how to do this. If Diana had been the one witnessing this pathetic breakdown maybe it would be different…
She’s dead. Faith’s inner monologue was furious. You let her die. Her chest ached as she swallowed hard over the lump in her throat. She had no watcher, no family, not one fucking person in the entire fucking world who gave a shit about her. Even the council who should have cared hadn’t bothered to assign her a new watcher. And it was so obvious that Giles thought of her as the expendable slayer. It was like she was right back where she was before Diana had found her. Except… Now she lay in the darkness with Buffy crying quietly into wayward strands of Faith’s hair. The other slayer was holding onto her arm and she was crying, because Faith was hurt. Maybe B wasn’t just blowing smoke up her ass with all that talk about being able to trust her. The brunette felt a louder sob bubble in her throat, and this time when Buffy’s strong arm snaked across her and pulled forward, Faith let herself be moved. As the blonde slid both arms around her and pulled her in close, the dark slayer’s sobs increased to the point where they were almost screams. Her arms folded around Buffy’s tiny waist, fists knotting in her pajama top.
“Okay,” Buffy whispered, smoothing her hair back from her hot face. “It’s okay, Faith, it’s okay.”
Faith’s headshake was frantic, her tears soaking into Buffy’s shirt and leaving her skin hot and sticky.
Unsure what to do, Buffy just held on as the other girl shook in her arms. Faith’s broken cries eventually trailed off, but she remained in Buffy’s arms, her head tucked beneath the blonde’s chin. “Gotta get ‘em back.” She muttered finally, as if to herself.
“We will.”
“Gotta get ‘em back.” Faith repeated, her voice hoarse. “If I’m not a slayer anymore, I’m just… Nothing.”
“That’s not true.” Buffy protested, shocked.
“Yes, it is.”
“Faith,” The blonde said, and she pulled back so she could peer into the other girl’s face. “We will get your powers back. I promise you.”
The brunette gave an unconvinced nod and pulled backward out of Buffy’s hold. Once free she rolled to face the wall, putting more distance between the two of them.
Buffy stared at Faith’s back. The other girl was taking deep, calming breaths now. This was obviously not the time to talk about what had happened earlier, no matter how much Buffy suddenly wanted to. But maybe Faith wouldn’t mind answering just a few questions… No. Faith’s upset. This can wait. But the blonde was so curious now, even though she wasn’t sure she was ready to face the answers Faith would give. I’m not going to bring it up. I won’t bring it up. “Faith?” She asked. Maybe just one question.
“What?”
“Today when you, uh, kissed me--”
“Look, it won’t happen again. Can you just drop it?” Faith coughed to hide the fact that she was still sniffling.
Buffy flushed. “I didn’t know you were gay.”
Faith muttered darkly. “I’m not.”
“But you kissed me.” Buffy repeated vacantly.
“Look, it’s just you, okay?”
“What does that mean?”
“It means,” Faith began loudly, then paused and lowered her voice. “It means you just make it like this for me, okay?”
“Oh,” Said Buffy, not really understanding. Faith didn’t like girls? Because she’d definitely seemed to like girls earlier. The other slayer’s hands had been confident as they pulled her in closer, holding her back like they were made to fit there. “Faith?”
“What?” She practically barked.
Buffy gazed timidly at the back of her bedmate’s head. “I just wanted to know how long.”
Faith rolled to face her, irritation plain in her movements. “How long what?”
“How long you wanted to do it for?”
The dark slayer sighed. “I don’t know. Maybe since Kakistos.”
“Oh.” Very intelligent reply, Buffy. She scolded herself. This conversation was not going as smoothly as she’d planned. Somehow she had to tell Faith that she wasn’t interested. Flattered yes, interested no. The other slayer had pointedly closed her eyes now but even as she feigned sleep, her face was guarded. Tension was evident in her brow and her shoulders were stiff. The dark slayer almost always looked defensive, Buffy realized. Except for earlier today. That had been the only time she’d ever seen Faith look truly open or relaxed. The expression on her face after they’d kissed. Faith had been… Well, happy. The brunette’s usual smile was bold and sharp, beautiful but cold. The one tonight had been different. It wasn’t so wide as usual, more like a soft sweep of her lips upward. Only a bare hint of her teeth were displayed and her eyes were wide with undisguised pleasure. Buffy liked that smile. It seemed like maybe that was the real Faith, hidden under layers of eyeliner and diamond smiles.
And it wasn’t as though the kiss had been bad exactly. “How about now?” She blurted out, surprising herself.
Faith lazily opened her eyes. “Huh?”
“Do you want to kiss me now?” Buffy clarified, suddenly feeling nervous. What am I doing?
Faith stared back at her for a long moment. Then she nodded, a muscle in her jaw ticking.
“Okay,” Buffy breathed out, and she slid a little closer to where the dark slayer was lying.
Lying perfectly still, Faith felt her heartbeat start to speed up. She wondered if Buffy’s slayer senses could pick that up. Probably. Fuck. Be cool, Lehane. She’s just a chick. The other slayer’s soft mouth pressed in on hers experimentally. Faith’s eyes fluttered shut as she sank forward, trying to keep her movements slow enough not to alarm the other girl.
Oh my God. Buffy was experiencing a surge of butterflies in her belly as she leaned in, pressing more confidently into Faith’s full lips. Maybe not butterflies. It was something bigger, like maybe pelicans. Pelicans setting off for a transatlantic flight in her stomach.
Her palms practically itched to slide over Buffy’s soft skin and meet on the smooth muscle of her back but Faith managed to keep still. She had no idea why she was letting this happen again. In the morning B would probably act all goody goody hetero super slayer and Faith would be just as pissed as she’d been earlier that day. But Jesus, it was Buffy and what else could she do? Her patience was rewarded when the other slayer’s warm fingers slid into the gap between Faith’s arm and her side, and rested lightly against her back. With a muffled moan, the dark slayer grabbed the other girl and pulled their bodies flush. She was expecting to vie for dominance with Buffy, but was pleasantly surprised when her peach lips parted under Faith’s gently probing tongue.
She exhaled hard when Faith’s quick tongue darted against hers, faint traces of cherry lip gloss flavoring the kiss. Buffy’s free hand made its way to Faith’s dark hair, winding in and pulling the other girl closer. The slayer realized with surprise that she was smiling against Faith’s mouth. She liked this. A lot. The thought might have been more alarming, but simultaneously she became aware that her breasts were pressing into Faith’s scantily covered chest. “Mmm.” She tugged hard on the other girl’s hips, bringing them into hard contact with hers.
“Wow.” Faith gasped, pulling back a little bit. “Trying to start something, B?”
“No.” Buffy assured her nervously. Like what? No, no. She wasn’t trying to start something. An hour ago she had been thinking of how to let Faith down easily. And now they were making out somewhat frantically in her bed. Faith thought she was ready to start something? “No.” She repeated firmly.
The flicker of panic across her fellow slayer’s face made Faith’s stomach clench in disappointment. Stupid. Fucking stupid. Again, for the second time in one day she’d let Buffy play games with her. “Yeah,” She muttered, extracted herself fully from the other girl. “Okay.”
Watching her retreat, Buffy felt hurt. Apparently Faith didn’t wanna kiss her unless she was going to get something more out of it. Angel had never been like that. Her heart seized. Angel. He’d hardly left Sunnydale and here she was making out with Faith. Faith of all people, who’d tried to kill him. She blinked hard, wiped her palm down her suddenly tired face. This was a disaster. Rolling away, she turned her back to face Faith’s. It was a long time before she could fall asleep.
-------------------------------
I hope you all enjoyed this installment. Please leave me any thoughts or comments you might have. I'm particularly interested to know what you thought about Faith crying. A couple people commented on how they were liking bad ass Faith, so I hope I didn't ruin her image with that scene! I toyed with idea of taking it out, but ultimately I liked it and decided to keep it. But I'd still be interested in your thoughts.
The next installment is about a third of the way completed, and I like how it's coming along so far. I'm hoping to get that out to you next week, assuming real life doesn't get in the way.
Continue to the next part...