[fic] To Quit This Act (14.A/14)
TITLE: To Quit This Act (14.A/14)
PAIRING: Ohmiya (Ohno SatoshixNinomiya Kazunari)
LENGTH: Multi-chaptered (14 chapters total)
BANDS: Arashi
GENRE: Drama? It's a roller-coaster, folks.
RATING: Hard R / NC-17 for this chapter.
WARNINGS: Language and sexual themes/situations.
SUMMARY: He did the things he did as a joke, and for years that was fine... but turning it into a prank changed everything entirely.
PREVIOUS PARTS: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 |
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
It was very hard to remain numb.
Nino tried as hard as he could to keep himself under control of the way Ohno made him feel, but it was very difficult. He felt like a windshield that Jun had gotten him to chip and now, however he tried to ignore that chip, it kept spreading into long weaving cracks and it would continue to do so until the glass just shattered. He refused to admit that the windshield needed repair though, instead squinting around the cracks and pretending they weren’t there at all.
He knew that was a bad idea, but he couldn’t think of another option. Besides, it was easy to ignore things when he was busy.
Luckily for him, Arashi was very busy.
For months they rehearsed and planned and promoted almost non-stop for their big, upcoming, beginning-of-summer concert. The hype from the movie had died down in anticipation for the sure to be spectacular tour, which was a blessing, and Nino threw himself into his work. He put all of his focus into following the dance steps, hitting the right notes, and any other tasks he could find, rather than leave any time for wandering thoughts. Wandering thoughts were a definite no-no.
Ohno seemed to have the same idea. Nino wouldn’t admit that his eyes had been straying to the other man whenever he let his guard down, but he’d definitely noticed Ohno working himself much harder than usual. It concerned him a little, but he couldn’t say anything better for his own behavior. Selfishly, he wondered if Ohno still worried about him at all.
“Okay guys!” The dance instructor called them to attention. “Tonight’s the big night so I’ve gone over all the parts we’re still a little rough on. I’m not gonna work you to death here or anything, but we’re going to go over whatever really needs to be looked at. Got it?” They all nodded. “All right, lets get in formation for Pikanchi then. That footwork before the second chorus is still a little slow, and Aiba-san: you’re still adding that extra step in there.”
During the rehearsal, the instructor actually had to ask Nino and Ohno, the two putting significantly more energy into the moves than anyone else, if they were trying to compete or something. They weren’t supposed to use up their energy before the concert even started, but Nino knew his limits and he intended to push them. Hopefully, he’d be so tired by the end of the night that he’d fall asleep without time to stare at the ceiling and wonder why he felt so empty and useless.
“Ah!”
“Leader!” Nino heard Jun exclaim, and looked up just in time to see Ohno stumble tiredly through a turn and lose his balance. He had no time to react before he was knocked to the ground; Ohno sprawled awkwardly and heavily on top of him. Nino tried to sit up immediately, but fell back just as quick when Ohno’s weight didn’t let him and he managed to crack his forehead off of Ohno’s wristwatch instead.
“Oh, shit, are you okay?” Ohno struggled to lift himself up on his knees. “I’m sorry, I tripped up, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Nino mumbled, rubbing his forehead and pulling himself up to a seated position as Ohno moved away. He raised his gaze, breath catching in his throat to find that Ohno was still sitting there and looking just as startled as Nino was to find their faces suddenly so close together. For a moment neither moved. Nino wasn’t even sure if he was breathing as he watched a bead of perspiration slide slowly down Ohno’s temple.
“N-Nino I-… Um…” Ohno blinked, abruptly turning away and clearing his throat. His voice still came out like a weak murmur. “…Sorry…” He got to his feet and hurried across the room to his water bottle, leaving the others to exchange glances and Nino to stay on the floor, staring into space.
“We’ll call that a day then, before someone gets injured.” The instructor announced slowly, looking in confusion at the five group members before gathering his things and leaving. Ohno followed soon after.
Nino bit his lip and sighed shakily before accepting Sho’s hand and being helped to his feet.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
The night air was starting to get warmer as spring finally seeped into summer. The five of them stood on a moving stage platform, ridiculous costumes soaked in sweat and grins stretched ear to ear. Their pulses were still pounding, maybe to the beat of the song they’d just finished, and the cheers of tens of thousands of fans were ringing in their ears.
“It’s been a busy year, hasn’t it everyone?!” Aiba called enthusiastically and met a loud affirmative cheer in response. “Well we’re not done yet! We’ve still got more for you guys!”
“Don’t forget Arashi is releasing a new album next month, featuring all three of the singles we released this year as well as lots more new material. Please listen to it!” Sho announced proudly.
“And MatsuJun’s super cheesy movie ‘A Heart with Wings’ came out on DVD last Tuesday!”
“Hey!” Jun aimed a swat at his leader’s shoulder.
Ohno laughed, dodging away and continuing. “If you haven’t bought it yet you should check it out! It’s actually really good so everybody should see it.”
“I guess this is a great time for summer romance.” Jun put in, taking his turn to advertise during the MC. “Has everybody seen ‘Blue Seas under Orange Skies’? I bet you have right?! Who would miss two Arashi members acting alongside each other in the same movie?” He laughed at the audience’s positive reaction. “Well, that movie’s having its DVD release on the twenty third, so any of you who want to re-watch those never before seen Ohmiya moments can rewind the kiss scenes as many times as you want! Keep an eye out for it!”
Again, there was crazy cheering. Somebody started a chant of ‘Kiss! Kiss!’ (Had Nino seen who it was he’d have given them the evil eye) and the rest of the masses took it up shortly. Nino and Ohno looked at each other awkwardly. Aiba bit his lip as though to hold back a smile, Sho looked uncomfortable on their behalf, and Jun was watching them intently.
Nino’s earpiece crackled and their manager’s voice began speaking into his ear. “What are you doing? Hurry up, we’re behind schedule as it is.”
“Are you serious…?” Nino complained lowly, and the audience cheered before upping the volume of their chanting as his response was picked up by his mic.
“You’re Ohmiya SK, aren’t you? You brought this upon yourselves, and people will think it’s weird if you don’t keep it up now.”
Nino sighed, turning to Ohno and taking only a split second to mentally brace himself. The sooner he did this and got it over with, the less time he’d have to chicken out. Ohno barely had time to frown before Nino grabbed him by the shoulders, holding him still as he leant in to kiss him softly and swiftly on the lips. The deafening cheers that erupted around them didn’t give him the opportunity to savor the gesture any longer and he broke away just as quick, letting Ohno go and pasting his trademark smirk on his features. “That’s just a sneak preview. You’ll have to buy it if you want anything else.” He chuckled, gesturing for the group to move back to the main stage for the next number and decidedly ignoring both the pounding of his heart against his ribcage and the growing and aching emptiness within his chest.
Dance steps and song lyrics filled his mind quickly and there was no room for other thoughts or feelings any more than there was room for error. But an hour later, when they stood surrounded by fountains and bright lights, when the closing instrumental music was playing and the audience was screaming their loudest for them, he held Ohno’s hand and watched the fireworks be reflected in his eyes as they bowed. The lights dimmed, and Nino’s stomach turned as, for just a moment, he allowed himself a chance to really think.
“What am I doing…?” He whispered, and the boom and crackle of the fireworks finale high above them swallowed his words into the night, unheard by even his own ears.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Sho was mildly surprised to find Nino standing outside of his hotel room door not long after they got back from the concert, hair still damp from the shower he’d obviously taken and pajama t-shirt on backwards.
Sho yawned, wishing he were still in the large bed behind him despite wanting to help out his younger friend. “Nino, why am I the one you always wake up in the middle of the night?” He sighed, rubbing his head and making a mess of his hair. “You’re not drunk this time are you?”
Nino shook his head. “I’ve been thinking…”
“And is that more or less problematic than you being drunk?” Sho asked wearily.
Nino frowned, pushing past him and into the room. “It should be less messy anyway.”
“Good enough…” Sho followed him in, closing the door behind them. “What’s wrong?”
“I can’t sleep.”
“Well I can. Why are you keeping me up?”
Nino sat down on the edge of the bed, testing the mattress’s bounciness and then shrugging.
Sho sighed and sat beside him, putting an arm around his narrow shoulders. “Is it Ohno?” A small nod, and Sho pulled him motherly to his side. “…What exactly have you been thinking?” He coaxed softly.
Nino was silent for a minute before letting out a tiny sigh and sinking against the newscaster as though he’d just melted. “… You and Aiba never kiss.” Sho jumped, nearly tossing Nino right off the bed in shock at the comment before he could get a hold of himself. Nino continued. “You’re close, but you never do stuff like that.”
“W-well, that’s because-“
“Because you don’t love him?”
Sho paused before shaking his head. “N-no… I do love him.” Nino looked up curiously. “As a friend.”
‘As a friend…’ Nino mouthed silently, looking away and frowning. “So does that mean we-? Do you think I-…?”
Sho nodded, guessing he knew what Nino couldn’t bring himself to ask verbally. “I’d guess that’s the case, yeah. We all would guess that, actually.”
“Is it… obvious?”
Sho smiled kindly, ruffling Nino’s hair and pulling him close. “We pretty much grew up with you guys, and even the fans -who only see your public sides- have their speculations. Of course we would clue in to how you two felt.” Nino looked away, eyes closed in an almost grimace as he worried his lip. “Aiba figured it out first, he’s always been intuitive like that, but once he pointed it out it made perfect sense to the rest of us too.”
“…I screwed this up big time…” Nino breathed.
“No you didn’t.” Sho soothed, rubbing his back. “You guys really care for each other. You can sort this out if you take the first step.”
“No, wait, maybe I should just leave things the way they are. He’s happy now, right? If I mess everything up again I’ll-“
“Nino, stop for a second. You know what would really make Ohno happy is more than just your friendship. And you have to stop using his ‘happiness’ as an excuse to chicken out. What would make you happy? Think about it seriously, because I know you’re not happy the way things are now.”
Nino closed his eyes, picturing the happiest memories he had. Some were with his family, some were with Arashi and his other friends in the entertainment industry, and most were with Ohno Satoshi; smiling, laughing, holding hands, kissing in the rowboat… The hollow spot in his chest ached, and he belatedly recognized what that growing emptiness was. His heart started pounding again, blood rushing through his veins like mad. His insides felt light and fluttery and he couldn’t seem to get enough air as he itched to run and scream and shout.
Sho chuckled, watching the shock and urgency appear in his features before pushing Nino lightly away from him and off the bed. “Go, I’m not the one you need to bother right now. Fix things.”
Nino nodded, rushing towards the door on legs that trembled and which he could barely recall how to use.
“And Nino,” Sho called, smiling softly, “be happy.”
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Part 14.B (FINAL) is >> HERE<<
PAIRING: Ohmiya (Ohno SatoshixNinomiya Kazunari)
LENGTH: Multi-chaptered (14 chapters total)
BANDS: Arashi
GENRE: Drama? It's a roller-coaster, folks.
RATING: Hard R / NC-17 for this chapter.
WARNINGS: Language and sexual themes/situations.
SUMMARY: He did the things he did as a joke, and for years that was fine... but turning it into a prank changed everything entirely.
PREVIOUS PARTS: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 |
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
It was very hard to remain numb.
Nino tried as hard as he could to keep himself under control of the way Ohno made him feel, but it was very difficult. He felt like a windshield that Jun had gotten him to chip and now, however he tried to ignore that chip, it kept spreading into long weaving cracks and it would continue to do so until the glass just shattered. He refused to admit that the windshield needed repair though, instead squinting around the cracks and pretending they weren’t there at all.
He knew that was a bad idea, but he couldn’t think of another option. Besides, it was easy to ignore things when he was busy.
Luckily for him, Arashi was very busy.
For months they rehearsed and planned and promoted almost non-stop for their big, upcoming, beginning-of-summer concert. The hype from the movie had died down in anticipation for the sure to be spectacular tour, which was a blessing, and Nino threw himself into his work. He put all of his focus into following the dance steps, hitting the right notes, and any other tasks he could find, rather than leave any time for wandering thoughts. Wandering thoughts were a definite no-no.
Ohno seemed to have the same idea. Nino wouldn’t admit that his eyes had been straying to the other man whenever he let his guard down, but he’d definitely noticed Ohno working himself much harder than usual. It concerned him a little, but he couldn’t say anything better for his own behavior. Selfishly, he wondered if Ohno still worried about him at all.
“Okay guys!” The dance instructor called them to attention. “Tonight’s the big night so I’ve gone over all the parts we’re still a little rough on. I’m not gonna work you to death here or anything, but we’re going to go over whatever really needs to be looked at. Got it?” They all nodded. “All right, lets get in formation for Pikanchi then. That footwork before the second chorus is still a little slow, and Aiba-san: you’re still adding that extra step in there.”
During the rehearsal, the instructor actually had to ask Nino and Ohno, the two putting significantly more energy into the moves than anyone else, if they were trying to compete or something. They weren’t supposed to use up their energy before the concert even started, but Nino knew his limits and he intended to push them. Hopefully, he’d be so tired by the end of the night that he’d fall asleep without time to stare at the ceiling and wonder why he felt so empty and useless.
“Ah!”
“Leader!” Nino heard Jun exclaim, and looked up just in time to see Ohno stumble tiredly through a turn and lose his balance. He had no time to react before he was knocked to the ground; Ohno sprawled awkwardly and heavily on top of him. Nino tried to sit up immediately, but fell back just as quick when Ohno’s weight didn’t let him and he managed to crack his forehead off of Ohno’s wristwatch instead.
“Oh, shit, are you okay?” Ohno struggled to lift himself up on his knees. “I’m sorry, I tripped up, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Nino mumbled, rubbing his forehead and pulling himself up to a seated position as Ohno moved away. He raised his gaze, breath catching in his throat to find that Ohno was still sitting there and looking just as startled as Nino was to find their faces suddenly so close together. For a moment neither moved. Nino wasn’t even sure if he was breathing as he watched a bead of perspiration slide slowly down Ohno’s temple.
“N-Nino I-… Um…” Ohno blinked, abruptly turning away and clearing his throat. His voice still came out like a weak murmur. “…Sorry…” He got to his feet and hurried across the room to his water bottle, leaving the others to exchange glances and Nino to stay on the floor, staring into space.
“We’ll call that a day then, before someone gets injured.” The instructor announced slowly, looking in confusion at the five group members before gathering his things and leaving. Ohno followed soon after.
Nino bit his lip and sighed shakily before accepting Sho’s hand and being helped to his feet.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
The night air was starting to get warmer as spring finally seeped into summer. The five of them stood on a moving stage platform, ridiculous costumes soaked in sweat and grins stretched ear to ear. Their pulses were still pounding, maybe to the beat of the song they’d just finished, and the cheers of tens of thousands of fans were ringing in their ears.
“It’s been a busy year, hasn’t it everyone?!” Aiba called enthusiastically and met a loud affirmative cheer in response. “Well we’re not done yet! We’ve still got more for you guys!”
“Don’t forget Arashi is releasing a new album next month, featuring all three of the singles we released this year as well as lots more new material. Please listen to it!” Sho announced proudly.
“And MatsuJun’s super cheesy movie ‘A Heart with Wings’ came out on DVD last Tuesday!”
“Hey!” Jun aimed a swat at his leader’s shoulder.
Ohno laughed, dodging away and continuing. “If you haven’t bought it yet you should check it out! It’s actually really good so everybody should see it.”
“I guess this is a great time for summer romance.” Jun put in, taking his turn to advertise during the MC. “Has everybody seen ‘Blue Seas under Orange Skies’? I bet you have right?! Who would miss two Arashi members acting alongside each other in the same movie?” He laughed at the audience’s positive reaction. “Well, that movie’s having its DVD release on the twenty third, so any of you who want to re-watch those never before seen Ohmiya moments can rewind the kiss scenes as many times as you want! Keep an eye out for it!”
Again, there was crazy cheering. Somebody started a chant of ‘Kiss! Kiss!’ (Had Nino seen who it was he’d have given them the evil eye) and the rest of the masses took it up shortly. Nino and Ohno looked at each other awkwardly. Aiba bit his lip as though to hold back a smile, Sho looked uncomfortable on their behalf, and Jun was watching them intently.
Nino’s earpiece crackled and their manager’s voice began speaking into his ear. “What are you doing? Hurry up, we’re behind schedule as it is.”
“Are you serious…?” Nino complained lowly, and the audience cheered before upping the volume of their chanting as his response was picked up by his mic.
“You’re Ohmiya SK, aren’t you? You brought this upon yourselves, and people will think it’s weird if you don’t keep it up now.”
Nino sighed, turning to Ohno and taking only a split second to mentally brace himself. The sooner he did this and got it over with, the less time he’d have to chicken out. Ohno barely had time to frown before Nino grabbed him by the shoulders, holding him still as he leant in to kiss him softly and swiftly on the lips. The deafening cheers that erupted around them didn’t give him the opportunity to savor the gesture any longer and he broke away just as quick, letting Ohno go and pasting his trademark smirk on his features. “That’s just a sneak preview. You’ll have to buy it if you want anything else.” He chuckled, gesturing for the group to move back to the main stage for the next number and decidedly ignoring both the pounding of his heart against his ribcage and the growing and aching emptiness within his chest.
Dance steps and song lyrics filled his mind quickly and there was no room for other thoughts or feelings any more than there was room for error. But an hour later, when they stood surrounded by fountains and bright lights, when the closing instrumental music was playing and the audience was screaming their loudest for them, he held Ohno’s hand and watched the fireworks be reflected in his eyes as they bowed. The lights dimmed, and Nino’s stomach turned as, for just a moment, he allowed himself a chance to really think.
“What am I doing…?” He whispered, and the boom and crackle of the fireworks finale high above them swallowed his words into the night, unheard by even his own ears.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Sho was mildly surprised to find Nino standing outside of his hotel room door not long after they got back from the concert, hair still damp from the shower he’d obviously taken and pajama t-shirt on backwards.
Sho yawned, wishing he were still in the large bed behind him despite wanting to help out his younger friend. “Nino, why am I the one you always wake up in the middle of the night?” He sighed, rubbing his head and making a mess of his hair. “You’re not drunk this time are you?”
Nino shook his head. “I’ve been thinking…”
“And is that more or less problematic than you being drunk?” Sho asked wearily.
Nino frowned, pushing past him and into the room. “It should be less messy anyway.”
“Good enough…” Sho followed him in, closing the door behind them. “What’s wrong?”
“I can’t sleep.”
“Well I can. Why are you keeping me up?”
Nino sat down on the edge of the bed, testing the mattress’s bounciness and then shrugging.
Sho sighed and sat beside him, putting an arm around his narrow shoulders. “Is it Ohno?” A small nod, and Sho pulled him motherly to his side. “…What exactly have you been thinking?” He coaxed softly.
Nino was silent for a minute before letting out a tiny sigh and sinking against the newscaster as though he’d just melted. “… You and Aiba never kiss.” Sho jumped, nearly tossing Nino right off the bed in shock at the comment before he could get a hold of himself. Nino continued. “You’re close, but you never do stuff like that.”
“W-well, that’s because-“
“Because you don’t love him?”
Sho paused before shaking his head. “N-no… I do love him.” Nino looked up curiously. “As a friend.”
‘As a friend…’ Nino mouthed silently, looking away and frowning. “So does that mean we-? Do you think I-…?”
Sho nodded, guessing he knew what Nino couldn’t bring himself to ask verbally. “I’d guess that’s the case, yeah. We all would guess that, actually.”
“Is it… obvious?”
Sho smiled kindly, ruffling Nino’s hair and pulling him close. “We pretty much grew up with you guys, and even the fans -who only see your public sides- have their speculations. Of course we would clue in to how you two felt.” Nino looked away, eyes closed in an almost grimace as he worried his lip. “Aiba figured it out first, he’s always been intuitive like that, but once he pointed it out it made perfect sense to the rest of us too.”
“…I screwed this up big time…” Nino breathed.
“No you didn’t.” Sho soothed, rubbing his back. “You guys really care for each other. You can sort this out if you take the first step.”
“No, wait, maybe I should just leave things the way they are. He’s happy now, right? If I mess everything up again I’ll-“
“Nino, stop for a second. You know what would really make Ohno happy is more than just your friendship. And you have to stop using his ‘happiness’ as an excuse to chicken out. What would make you happy? Think about it seriously, because I know you’re not happy the way things are now.”
Nino closed his eyes, picturing the happiest memories he had. Some were with his family, some were with Arashi and his other friends in the entertainment industry, and most were with Ohno Satoshi; smiling, laughing, holding hands, kissing in the rowboat… The hollow spot in his chest ached, and he belatedly recognized what that growing emptiness was. His heart started pounding again, blood rushing through his veins like mad. His insides felt light and fluttery and he couldn’t seem to get enough air as he itched to run and scream and shout.
Sho chuckled, watching the shock and urgency appear in his features before pushing Nino lightly away from him and off the bed. “Go, I’m not the one you need to bother right now. Fix things.”
Nino nodded, rushing towards the door on legs that trembled and which he could barely recall how to use.
“And Nino,” Sho called, smiling softly, “be happy.”
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Part 14.B (FINAL) is >> HERE<<