Hanabi 26/?? - ReitaXRuki
Title: Hanabi
Chapter: 26/??
Author: chuu ( akichuu)
Fandom: JRock, Gazette
Pairings: ReitaXRuki. Some other pairings in the background that you might find later on...
Overall Rating: PG
Genre: Drop dead fluffy.
Warnings: n/a. Un-beta-ed mistakes.
Summary: It's all or nothing. And the time is now...
Comments: Updated! And I won't leave you long comments. Just read. XD
Hanabi : 26
Reita had hardly taken a bite at the toasted bread he had in his hands, nor had he finished more than half of that one fried egg - funny how it seemed to be so resilient against Reita's knife and fork. The food that he had managed to gulp in didn't go well with his throat, but he knew it wasn't his mother's fault for cooking them. There really wasn't anything wrong with the cooking and given it a better time, they would taste good, as always. It was just him, but before he finished this, Reita was stuck where he was. His mother would not let him off the seat before his plate was clean... So Reita sat, fighting, suppressing the need to explode and hoping that he was nibbling fast enough on his poor toasted bread to finish it as soon as possible (or at least before he puked on it).
Ruki seemed to be enduring the same torture too - as Reita took a timid, brief glance diagonally towards the boy in front of him. The blonde sat there, facing his plate, his hands toyed with the egg that was his share. The poor egg had been dissected to many little pieces, and now Ruki was arranging them randomly all over his plate. He should add a nicely carved tomato or something, to add up some more colors to the decoration - so Reita thought. It was inappropriate, he knew, but he couldn't blame Ruki if the boy hadn't more appetite than himself.
Reita's mother stood by the dining table, arms folded on her chest. She heaved an audible sigh, watching the two sitting in front of her. "Oh you two... Look at what you're doing to my cooking..." she said, "They deserve a better treatment than that - no, Ruki, put down your fork. I think you've had enough covering the whole plate with egg. And you too, Akira, put down that bread before it gets moldy right in front of your mouth..." By now, Reita knew she had given up on her intentions to feed the two boys with proper breakfast before they started the day with whatever it was they needed to do.
Reita peered at his mother and gave her an apologetical look, hoping that she would see it and understand. Appetite had long gone from his nerves as they were only throbbing anxiously for more urgent matters at the moment: What must he say to Ruki? What reaction would Ruki put up if he even dared to try talking to him? Was it going to be his doom, so soon? Was Ruki going to make this day, Reita's judgment day?
For once in his life, Reita wished he could read people's mind like some gifted people in the movies.
Ruki, as Reita watched, did what Reita's mother had asked him to do: he put down the fork on the plate, and he gazed at what he had done to the egg and the plate, as if admiring a job he had successfully done. Reita decided it would be better to oblige the command as well, so he placed the poorly nibbled bread on top of his plate. Reita saw a small dent on one of the corners he had made, and a funny, gurgling noise came up from his stomach when he realized just how small of a part he had eaten.
"Okay you two, get off the table and let me clean up the mess," Reita's mother gave a strict notion, and if only Reita hadn't looked up at her face to see her twitching her lips, he would've thought that she was really, really angry. He knew without looking, when his mother turned around, carrying the plates that were Ruki and Reita's, she was actually grinning.
Ruki got up first, mumbling a faint 'Thank you for the food' towards Reita's mother, and he gave a brief glance to Reita. Reita, quite surprised by that small gesture, having taken it as a sign to follow the blonde, got up from his seat as well, and followed Ruki to wherever it was he was heading to - which turned out to be the backyard.
His heart was threatening to burst out of his chest.
The morning had shifted from the dim-orange-ly lit scenery into a serene, bright-bluish day; Reita pondered at the skies when he had reached the terrace. It might be a bright day after all, looking at the sun teasing cheerfully at the scarcely clouded skies. Looking at how blue and healthy the skies were that morning, Reita felt a slight pinch in his heart - because he couldn't help thinking about the dark, hanabi-filled skies that it had been last night. Just like the day that had come to replace the night, it felt as if the blue skies had come to take away the memory that had bloomed last night.
He saw how the blonde who had led him here stood quietly, leaning at the door frame. Reita took no time to wait for a notion or a warning, he just walked towards the edge of the terrace, and sat himself there. His head, as he realized it, was still pretty painful to have to endure a long wait standing up. And right when he got his bottom touching the floor, his head throbbed again.
So, for a while, he sat there while Ruki - he believed - was standing at the door. Neither of them said anything, as if they were letting the morning birds twittering their thoughts instead.
Would you be wise? Or would you be safe?
He remembered his options very, very clearly, and he remembered the consequences of each option. Which of the two was he going to do? Which of the two would provide him with more promising guarantees?
"Ruki..." he looked behind his shoulder; the blonde startled, as if he had been daydreaming before Reita called his name. "Sit down," Reita gestured to the empty space by his side, but Ruki didn't move, "Come on, I won't do anything to you, I won't even touch you, I swear it..."
When Reita looked up to see the blonde, he seemed so small and so afraid, standing with that unavoidable distance from Reita. Having to persuade Ruki the way he had just done, it made Reita feel as if he was some sort of a perverted old man who would hurt a little boy - the image was sickening, really... And it hurt, of course... It hurt to see how terrified Ruki was just to sit right next to Reita now.
"Fine..." he whispered, desperately, "Just go, Ruki. You don't even seem to want to be here."
The blonde's small eyes flickered a bit as he heard that. "I..." he mumbled, before biting his lip in silent apprehension. And then, seemed to have made up his mind, Ruki took some steps nearing where Reita was sitting, and about a feet away, he sat himself down.
Oh great, why don't you just sit a mile away from me, then?
The attitude Ruki was showing up, the face he was making, added up with the agonizing headache Reita was having - everything came together and united to give Reita one hell of a hard time to stay still and be calm. His feeling was no longer doubtful or apprehensive, but it started to be some kind of irritation. The anger bubbling up from beneath, seeing how Ruki wouldn't even stare at him for more than two seconds. Reita knew if he would dare stretching an arm towards the boy, he would immediately jump up and dash for the door, scream for help or anything at all to save him from Reita.
"Reita, I..." the soft, timid voice made Reita startle. The blonde was, again, biting his lip without finishing his sentence.
Reita tried calming himself down. It had been his mistake, after all. And even if the situation he was in right now wasn't at all comfortable, he should start with a decent apology - at the very least. "Ruki, listen..." he mumbled, sight down at the grasses beneath his dangling feet; there was a bug traveling on and between the leafs... "Ruki, I'm sorry."
He heard the boy shifted by his side.
"I... What I did last night... I'm sorry," Reita continued; the bug made a nice leap but it almost slipped as it landed on the leaf it had been heading to, "It wasn't something that... Well, I should've said something before..." The bug halted, it seemed to be staring at Reita, as if it was sitting there as a witness... "It's just that I... Before last night I haven't realized..." It seemed to be tilting its head to the side - lolling at Reita's words, probably, "Well I know I should've said something but I just..." And while the bug walked a few bug's feet on that leaf's surface, Reita's head started to throb again in pain, "Ruki, I..." It's getting worse, as if his brain had a heart of its own - beating and pounding against his skull, "Well I..."
It was irritating - the headache!
"Oh whatever..." Reita huffed; quickly, he turned towards Ruki, staring at that abashed-red face - for the boy seemed to have been surprised by Reita's sudden movement. "The run-around speech... That's not me, Ruki, so I'll just go straight to the point," he said, surprising himself by his own strong and determined voice, "I like you. Yes, I do, I really, really like you, and no it's not just some fondness between friends. I care about you more than I care about myself. You know I've never left your side and I even listened to your whining and complaints, I've been there every time you needed me. I wouldn't have done any of that for anyone I don't seriously care about."
Ruki's face seemed dazed or something... But Reita had started it, he knew he couldn't stop in the middle of it.
"You and your obsession with Aoi-kun, I never liked it, but I stayed around just because you needed someone to listen to you," Reita mumbled again, "And so I stayed. I stayed although, honestly, I couldn't stand listening to you talking about Aoi-kun... It hurt, always, when I had to watch you paying so much attention to him. It hurt but I just couldn't tell you, because that would offend you and the last thing on earth that I wanted was to see you angry..." Reita took a deep breath, "You know... It wasn't until a few days ago that I've been told that it was jealousy. I never knew what it was or was it even real, until last night. When I had to listen to you talking about how you've seen Aoi-kun and Uruha together, I suddenly felt like you were talking about me. Me... standing at a distance watching you and Aoi-kun.
"I've always been an idiot and I know I'm so ignorant in this matter, I even needed someone else to be telling me how I really felt. I needed the world to show me a huge sign in front of my eyes to make me realize about this feeling I have about you."
A soft sight left his mouth. What he had intended to be a short, straight-down-to-the-point words, now extended to be a long speech after all. It felt like there was a hole made through the core of his heart and what had been contained inside was now leaking freely outward; everything just flowed out and it was almost shocking that he hadn't had troubles picking the words to say these stuffs - when in fact Reita was usually not much of a talker.
"Maybe I haven't told you this, but you... You looked..." Adorably cute... "Stunning, last night, and I..." Was lost in a world of wonders... "I finally realized that you're just too special for me. And I..." Fell in love idiotically with you... "Realized that I just couldn't... I couldn't stand seeing you sad or troubled. And before I knew what I was doing I..." Attacked you with a kiss, smart eh? "Kissed you."
A pair of pinkish nuance came up on Ruki's morning-pale cheeks.
"I like you, Ruki," Reita repeated; It's all or nothing, Reita. "I'm sorry for not saying anything before I kissed you, but now I'm telling you... I like you..." Another deep, long intake of breath, "I love you."
Reita had had the worst of thoughts, he had had guesses that it would be terribly hard just to say those words, but it actually... Came out easier that how he had feared it to be. So that was what it felt like to say those words to someone... Well, he didn't feel like throwing up or getting a stomach ache or anything, he just felt... Released. It was as if a heavy burden had been lifted off of his shoulders, and he was able to breathe freely again now. It didn't matter too much - now that he had come to this point - whether Ruki didn't feel the same or even if Ruki would hate him for telling him this. It felt good, to be honest, and he felt bolder than how he had been a few minutes ago.
The next minute passed in complete silence and dreadful tension that Reita just had to lower his sight back to the grasses. Wait, that bug was still there... Was it spying on Reita? Was it listening to his conversation?? Reita suddenly had an obnoxiously impossible thought that the bug could've been Matsuda. Oh yes... It was so likely... Matsuda would steal every chance there was to keep an eye on Reita... And if she had been a small, almost-unnoticeable bug, she would sneak into every crevice she could find to peek at Reita.
Now that was a scary thought...
"Ruki..." Reita mumbled; he looked aside at the blonde, narrowing his eyes, trying to see beyond the staggering silence Ruki was putting up in front of him. If Ruki would just say something, then Reita would know what to do.
The blonde was eyeing on his lap - or so it seemed, his mouth slightly opened, and there was still that blush adorning his cheeks.
Is he angry at me? ... Angrier than he was already?
But Reita had been pretty much prepared, now. Now that he had been told about his consequences, now that he had thought about all of the possibilities - good or bad. He had been given clues of what was coming. 'Whatever will be, will be', wasn't it?
After another two or three minutes, the blonde still wouldn't respond - not even with a single word. Reita couldn't stand it anymore. His headache might've caused it; Reita swore how he could actually hear the pounding against his skull. The silence made it all excruciatingly clearer, so he felt he just had to break it. His hand didn't make a sound when he shifted it, fingers reaching to what he remembered as the softest cheek he had ever touched... But it was Ruki who finally made a sound - startled, he moved quickly and got himself up from where he had been sitting. It was as if his cheek had been touched by a burning coal...
Reita could only look up at the blonde, sadly, when the blonde stutteringly said: "Sorry..." And with quick steps, he left Reita at the back terrace - alone with a banging pain in his head.
===
previous chapters and other titles
Chapter: 26/??
Author: chuu ( akichuu)
Fandom: JRock, Gazette
Pairings: ReitaXRuki. Some other pairings in the background that you might find later on...
Overall Rating: PG
Genre: Drop dead fluffy.
Warnings: n/a. Un-beta-ed mistakes.
Summary: It's all or nothing. And the time is now...
Comments: Updated! And I won't leave you long comments. Just read. XD
Hanabi : 26
Reita had hardly taken a bite at the toasted bread he had in his hands, nor had he finished more than half of that one fried egg - funny how it seemed to be so resilient against Reita's knife and fork. The food that he had managed to gulp in didn't go well with his throat, but he knew it wasn't his mother's fault for cooking them. There really wasn't anything wrong with the cooking and given it a better time, they would taste good, as always. It was just him, but before he finished this, Reita was stuck where he was. His mother would not let him off the seat before his plate was clean... So Reita sat, fighting, suppressing the need to explode and hoping that he was nibbling fast enough on his poor toasted bread to finish it as soon as possible (or at least before he puked on it).
Ruki seemed to be enduring the same torture too - as Reita took a timid, brief glance diagonally towards the boy in front of him. The blonde sat there, facing his plate, his hands toyed with the egg that was his share. The poor egg had been dissected to many little pieces, and now Ruki was arranging them randomly all over his plate. He should add a nicely carved tomato or something, to add up some more colors to the decoration - so Reita thought. It was inappropriate, he knew, but he couldn't blame Ruki if the boy hadn't more appetite than himself.
Reita's mother stood by the dining table, arms folded on her chest. She heaved an audible sigh, watching the two sitting in front of her. "Oh you two... Look at what you're doing to my cooking..." she said, "They deserve a better treatment than that - no, Ruki, put down your fork. I think you've had enough covering the whole plate with egg. And you too, Akira, put down that bread before it gets moldy right in front of your mouth..." By now, Reita knew she had given up on her intentions to feed the two boys with proper breakfast before they started the day with whatever it was they needed to do.
Reita peered at his mother and gave her an apologetical look, hoping that she would see it and understand. Appetite had long gone from his nerves as they were only throbbing anxiously for more urgent matters at the moment: What must he say to Ruki? What reaction would Ruki put up if he even dared to try talking to him? Was it going to be his doom, so soon? Was Ruki going to make this day, Reita's judgment day?
For once in his life, Reita wished he could read people's mind like some gifted people in the movies.
Ruki, as Reita watched, did what Reita's mother had asked him to do: he put down the fork on the plate, and he gazed at what he had done to the egg and the plate, as if admiring a job he had successfully done. Reita decided it would be better to oblige the command as well, so he placed the poorly nibbled bread on top of his plate. Reita saw a small dent on one of the corners he had made, and a funny, gurgling noise came up from his stomach when he realized just how small of a part he had eaten.
"Okay you two, get off the table and let me clean up the mess," Reita's mother gave a strict notion, and if only Reita hadn't looked up at her face to see her twitching her lips, he would've thought that she was really, really angry. He knew without looking, when his mother turned around, carrying the plates that were Ruki and Reita's, she was actually grinning.
Ruki got up first, mumbling a faint 'Thank you for the food' towards Reita's mother, and he gave a brief glance to Reita. Reita, quite surprised by that small gesture, having taken it as a sign to follow the blonde, got up from his seat as well, and followed Ruki to wherever it was he was heading to - which turned out to be the backyard.
His heart was threatening to burst out of his chest.
The morning had shifted from the dim-orange-ly lit scenery into a serene, bright-bluish day; Reita pondered at the skies when he had reached the terrace. It might be a bright day after all, looking at the sun teasing cheerfully at the scarcely clouded skies. Looking at how blue and healthy the skies were that morning, Reita felt a slight pinch in his heart - because he couldn't help thinking about the dark, hanabi-filled skies that it had been last night. Just like the day that had come to replace the night, it felt as if the blue skies had come to take away the memory that had bloomed last night.
He saw how the blonde who had led him here stood quietly, leaning at the door frame. Reita took no time to wait for a notion or a warning, he just walked towards the edge of the terrace, and sat himself there. His head, as he realized it, was still pretty painful to have to endure a long wait standing up. And right when he got his bottom touching the floor, his head throbbed again.
So, for a while, he sat there while Ruki - he believed - was standing at the door. Neither of them said anything, as if they were letting the morning birds twittering their thoughts instead.
Would you be wise? Or would you be safe?
He remembered his options very, very clearly, and he remembered the consequences of each option. Which of the two was he going to do? Which of the two would provide him with more promising guarantees?
"Ruki..." he looked behind his shoulder; the blonde startled, as if he had been daydreaming before Reita called his name. "Sit down," Reita gestured to the empty space by his side, but Ruki didn't move, "Come on, I won't do anything to you, I won't even touch you, I swear it..."
When Reita looked up to see the blonde, he seemed so small and so afraid, standing with that unavoidable distance from Reita. Having to persuade Ruki the way he had just done, it made Reita feel as if he was some sort of a perverted old man who would hurt a little boy - the image was sickening, really... And it hurt, of course... It hurt to see how terrified Ruki was just to sit right next to Reita now.
"Fine..." he whispered, desperately, "Just go, Ruki. You don't even seem to want to be here."
The blonde's small eyes flickered a bit as he heard that. "I..." he mumbled, before biting his lip in silent apprehension. And then, seemed to have made up his mind, Ruki took some steps nearing where Reita was sitting, and about a feet away, he sat himself down.
Oh great, why don't you just sit a mile away from me, then?
The attitude Ruki was showing up, the face he was making, added up with the agonizing headache Reita was having - everything came together and united to give Reita one hell of a hard time to stay still and be calm. His feeling was no longer doubtful or apprehensive, but it started to be some kind of irritation. The anger bubbling up from beneath, seeing how Ruki wouldn't even stare at him for more than two seconds. Reita knew if he would dare stretching an arm towards the boy, he would immediately jump up and dash for the door, scream for help or anything at all to save him from Reita.
"Reita, I..." the soft, timid voice made Reita startle. The blonde was, again, biting his lip without finishing his sentence.
Reita tried calming himself down. It had been his mistake, after all. And even if the situation he was in right now wasn't at all comfortable, he should start with a decent apology - at the very least. "Ruki, listen..." he mumbled, sight down at the grasses beneath his dangling feet; there was a bug traveling on and between the leafs... "Ruki, I'm sorry."
He heard the boy shifted by his side.
"I... What I did last night... I'm sorry," Reita continued; the bug made a nice leap but it almost slipped as it landed on the leaf it had been heading to, "It wasn't something that... Well, I should've said something before..." The bug halted, it seemed to be staring at Reita, as if it was sitting there as a witness... "It's just that I... Before last night I haven't realized..." It seemed to be tilting its head to the side - lolling at Reita's words, probably, "Well I know I should've said something but I just..." And while the bug walked a few bug's feet on that leaf's surface, Reita's head started to throb again in pain, "Ruki, I..." It's getting worse, as if his brain had a heart of its own - beating and pounding against his skull, "Well I..."
It was irritating - the headache!
"Oh whatever..." Reita huffed; quickly, he turned towards Ruki, staring at that abashed-red face - for the boy seemed to have been surprised by Reita's sudden movement. "The run-around speech... That's not me, Ruki, so I'll just go straight to the point," he said, surprising himself by his own strong and determined voice, "I like you. Yes, I do, I really, really like you, and no it's not just some fondness between friends. I care about you more than I care about myself. You know I've never left your side and I even listened to your whining and complaints, I've been there every time you needed me. I wouldn't have done any of that for anyone I don't seriously care about."
Ruki's face seemed dazed or something... But Reita had started it, he knew he couldn't stop in the middle of it.
"You and your obsession with Aoi-kun, I never liked it, but I stayed around just because you needed someone to listen to you," Reita mumbled again, "And so I stayed. I stayed although, honestly, I couldn't stand listening to you talking about Aoi-kun... It hurt, always, when I had to watch you paying so much attention to him. It hurt but I just couldn't tell you, because that would offend you and the last thing on earth that I wanted was to see you angry..." Reita took a deep breath, "You know... It wasn't until a few days ago that I've been told that it was jealousy. I never knew what it was or was it even real, until last night. When I had to listen to you talking about how you've seen Aoi-kun and Uruha together, I suddenly felt like you were talking about me. Me... standing at a distance watching you and Aoi-kun.
"I've always been an idiot and I know I'm so ignorant in this matter, I even needed someone else to be telling me how I really felt. I needed the world to show me a huge sign in front of my eyes to make me realize about this feeling I have about you."
A soft sight left his mouth. What he had intended to be a short, straight-down-to-the-point words, now extended to be a long speech after all. It felt like there was a hole made through the core of his heart and what had been contained inside was now leaking freely outward; everything just flowed out and it was almost shocking that he hadn't had troubles picking the words to say these stuffs - when in fact Reita was usually not much of a talker.
"Maybe I haven't told you this, but you... You looked..." Adorably cute... "Stunning, last night, and I..." Was lost in a world of wonders... "I finally realized that you're just too special for me. And I..." Fell in love idiotically with you... "Realized that I just couldn't... I couldn't stand seeing you sad or troubled. And before I knew what I was doing I..." Attacked you with a kiss, smart eh? "Kissed you."
A pair of pinkish nuance came up on Ruki's morning-pale cheeks.
"I like you, Ruki," Reita repeated; It's all or nothing, Reita. "I'm sorry for not saying anything before I kissed you, but now I'm telling you... I like you..." Another deep, long intake of breath, "I love you."
Reita had had the worst of thoughts, he had had guesses that it would be terribly hard just to say those words, but it actually... Came out easier that how he had feared it to be. So that was what it felt like to say those words to someone... Well, he didn't feel like throwing up or getting a stomach ache or anything, he just felt... Released. It was as if a heavy burden had been lifted off of his shoulders, and he was able to breathe freely again now. It didn't matter too much - now that he had come to this point - whether Ruki didn't feel the same or even if Ruki would hate him for telling him this. It felt good, to be honest, and he felt bolder than how he had been a few minutes ago.
The next minute passed in complete silence and dreadful tension that Reita just had to lower his sight back to the grasses. Wait, that bug was still there... Was it spying on Reita? Was it listening to his conversation?? Reita suddenly had an obnoxiously impossible thought that the bug could've been Matsuda. Oh yes... It was so likely... Matsuda would steal every chance there was to keep an eye on Reita... And if she had been a small, almost-unnoticeable bug, she would sneak into every crevice she could find to peek at Reita.
Now that was a scary thought...
"Ruki..." Reita mumbled; he looked aside at the blonde, narrowing his eyes, trying to see beyond the staggering silence Ruki was putting up in front of him. If Ruki would just say something, then Reita would know what to do.
The blonde was eyeing on his lap - or so it seemed, his mouth slightly opened, and there was still that blush adorning his cheeks.
Is he angry at me? ... Angrier than he was already?
But Reita had been pretty much prepared, now. Now that he had been told about his consequences, now that he had thought about all of the possibilities - good or bad. He had been given clues of what was coming. 'Whatever will be, will be', wasn't it?
After another two or three minutes, the blonde still wouldn't respond - not even with a single word. Reita couldn't stand it anymore. His headache might've caused it; Reita swore how he could actually hear the pounding against his skull. The silence made it all excruciatingly clearer, so he felt he just had to break it. His hand didn't make a sound when he shifted it, fingers reaching to what he remembered as the softest cheek he had ever touched... But it was Ruki who finally made a sound - startled, he moved quickly and got himself up from where he had been sitting. It was as if his cheek had been touched by a burning coal...
Reita could only look up at the blonde, sadly, when the blonde stutteringly said: "Sorry..." And with quick steps, he left Reita at the back terrace - alone with a banging pain in his head.
===
previous chapters and other titles