Web
Inside the bathroom, she leans against the door, wrapping an arm around her waist, as she tries to hold herself together.
She can't. Her hands begin to tear at the dress, coming away bloody, 'have to clean wound, have to stop the blood' and it's dripping down her back.
For a moment she wonders if the wound will keep weeping, if she can sit and wait for blood loss to kill her. At least she's escaped the shadow. At least she knows that she won't die in its service. Now, she has to survive until morning. After her friends are safe, after she knows Nita's back at the bar or back on Earth, she can rip open her veins or stab herself in the chest or any number of methods. There are poisons that would also do the job...the only person she's planning on hurting is herself.
If he hadn't shielded her, she would reach out for Nita...and if she thought no one would catch her, she'd try to reach Chase, Angela, Dad...
She knows she'll never see them again and she closes her eyes on fresh tears, falling to her knees and curling over, unable to swallow her sobs. She puts her hand over her mouth, not wanting Asmodean to hear. Her only chance is that he thinks her strong and if he knows she's weak, if he knows that she's barely holding together, he'll go back on the deal and that can't happen.
"I'm sorry," she says through clenched teeth, biting her lip hard enough to taste copper. Everything was finally going well. Chase was happy, she and her Dad were in a good place, Angela was even getting better, she and Nita were and now...
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." she almost chants through her sobs, face near the floor. She rests her cheek against the floor, 'Shouldhaveletmedie, shouldhaveletmedie'
If she can escape, she will, but if she can't -- she'll end things on her own terms.
She rises to her knees and closes her eyes, hands folded in front of her. 'If you're listening, if you can even hear anyone in this place...please don't let them ever find out, don't let them find out I...I don't want to cause them anymore pain. Please.' She mouths the words of prayers she can barely remember and hopes that she'll be able to escape - one way or the other.
'Maybe I'll get to go back after I die...'
There are worse places to spend an afterlife than Milliways.
But then she'll have to tell them the truth. And they'll hate her for being so weak.
She can't. Her hands begin to tear at the dress, coming away bloody, 'have to clean wound, have to stop the blood' and it's dripping down her back.
For a moment she wonders if the wound will keep weeping, if she can sit and wait for blood loss to kill her. At least she's escaped the shadow. At least she knows that she won't die in its service. Now, she has to survive until morning. After her friends are safe, after she knows Nita's back at the bar or back on Earth, she can rip open her veins or stab herself in the chest or any number of methods. There are poisons that would also do the job...the only person she's planning on hurting is herself.
If he hadn't shielded her, she would reach out for Nita...and if she thought no one would catch her, she'd try to reach Chase, Angela, Dad...
She knows she'll never see them again and she closes her eyes on fresh tears, falling to her knees and curling over, unable to swallow her sobs. She puts her hand over her mouth, not wanting Asmodean to hear. Her only chance is that he thinks her strong and if he knows she's weak, if he knows that she's barely holding together, he'll go back on the deal and that can't happen.
"I'm sorry," she says through clenched teeth, biting her lip hard enough to taste copper. Everything was finally going well. Chase was happy, she and her Dad were in a good place, Angela was even getting better, she and Nita were and now...
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." she almost chants through her sobs, face near the floor. She rests her cheek against the floor, 'Shouldhaveletmedie, shouldhaveletmedie'
If she can escape, she will, but if she can't -- she'll end things on her own terms.
She rises to her knees and closes her eyes, hands folded in front of her. 'If you're listening, if you can even hear anyone in this place...please don't let them ever find out, don't let them find out I...I don't want to cause them anymore pain. Please.' She mouths the words of prayers she can barely remember and hopes that she'll be able to escape - one way or the other.
'Maybe I'll get to go back after I die...'
There are worse places to spend an afterlife than Milliways.
But then she'll have to tell them the truth. And they'll hate her for being so weak.