Gah.

[agilebrit]

Back to the drawing board on the drabble. The Hubby had a sort of "eh" reaction to it, and ericjamesstone rightly pointed out that it's really too vague to be effective.

And I tend to agree. Something like this needs to either make the reader laugh, or be a gut-punch. This is neither. It's okay, but it's not greatI used to be the Drabble Queen. I once

Comments

[mermaidrain]

Yeah, I hate to admit it, but I found it a little confusing myself due to the vagueness. Is it saying the person talking is actually working at a firm in hell (or some sort of supernatural place)? *is confused*

[agilebrit]

Oh, please, if something that I write is confusing, go ahead and tell me! I can take it, and I need to know.

*hunts for Flaubert, because funny is better than gut-punch under these circumstances, I think*

[mermaidrain]

You know, it's not like it needs a massive overhaul. Just a little tweaking should do it. I can see what you're trying to do after all. And having a drabble on the back of a business card is a really cool idea too.

[agilebrit]

If I could just figure out what this character's "line" is, and how he crossed it, then I might have that thing we call "story." I've got something nibbling here, I think.

I'm wondering if my self-imposed limit of a hundred words is too confining, though...