Blargh.

[agilebrit]

I have a cold. I think. Yuck. I have been completely uninspired to write anything and I'm really tired. And my leg hurts. That place where I scraped it on the rock on Antelope Island? It's turned a lovely purple color, on the inside of the leg, from about an inch over my ankle up to the bottom part of the calf muscle. I've been using Bag

Comments

[whirligigged]

Don't you love when people anonymously ask questions that could so easily be found out just by clicking on a link? I get a lot of "Do you have any more of this pairing?" when they could easily just click on the profile and look themselves, or "I hope you write more soon!" when there are twenty chapters left in the story. Heh.

Blargh. The Sue was twelve before, wasn't she? Do you suppose that's how old the author is? It would explain the scary underage-ness of the character and frightening quality of writing, at least. *wince*

[agilebrit]

Yup, the Sue was twelve. *cringe* The major problem with the story (other than the horrid grammar) is that it's not a story. Stories are about some sort of conflict (Man vs Man, Man vs Himself, or Man vs Nature are the main ones), and there's nothing there. Girl goes home from school with friend, they listen to music, she goes out on patrol, slays some vamps (with ridiculous ease) meets Angel, and then beds him three days later. A series of events is not Plot, because Plot has to actually GO somewhere. There has to be a point.

And, okay, I made the same mistake when I was thirteen. I had no idea about what actually constituted Plot or Story, and I sucked. I wish someone had told me that when I was madly scribbling away on my go-nowhere "story."

Of course, I did know how to spell and punctuate...