Little Things
Title:Little Things
Author: agape_eternal
Pairing: Ryan Lochte/Michael Phelps
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Summary: All the little things Ryan hates, Michael loves.
Author Notes: basically the new One Direction song did this.
Feed Back: is ♥
If I let you know I'm here for you maybe you'll love yourself like I love you oh.. (AO3)
Michael has figured out that 95% of Ryan's fans generally feel two ways about him: he's stupid but he's hot and/or he's hot but a ho and ridiculously conceited.
Michael would laugh whenever he reads stuff like that if it didn't piss him off so bad. Ryan isn't stupid or a ho. Unless you count him being Michael's but that's beside the point.
What pisses Michael off more than what they say is that it actually hurts Ryan. A lot. Michael isn't sure why people haven't figured out that yes, he can see it and, whether people think he doesn't, he does. And it hurts.
Ryan comes off more confident than he's ever felt. Yes he's a three time Olympian, yes he did beat the competition by an amazing 3 seconds in the 400 IM. He's proud of his accomplishments.
But he still stands in the mirror and frowns.
He makes a face at the laugh lines next to his eyes and all his freckles. He still pokes at his thighs and frowns. He frowns at the way his stomach looks, the way he thinks it looks weird when he bends over, which he does repeatedly to prove his point. He still hates his back dimples, even though, most of the time, he can't see them.
He won't go shopping for weeks after a pair of jeans he loves run small and he can't fit into them the way he wants or someone makes another comment about his muffin top in one of his Speedo's, the way he's barely squeez into it.
He's taken being "healthy" as an excuse to count his calories meticulously. He counts everything down to the two bites of a sandwich he didn't finish because he was still "full" from breakfast. He sulks when he sees the numbers on the scale. So he ends up overworking himself but hides it behind the ridiculous number of Gatorade's he drinks, which he frowns at when he adds his calories up at night.
He cringes when he listens to an interview of his or sees himself on TV. He hates his voice, especially when it's recorded. He hates the shit he gets, which seemingly happens every single time he opens his mouth, even more. He thinks he sounds stupid himself, he's not surprised his fans do too.
Ryan doesn't talk about this to Michael much. He doesn't want a lecture of how he's nitpicking about himself, how he's worrying to much about what other people think. His dad gave him more than enough when he was younger. But sometimes he'll make an offhanded comment about the way his speedo fits. Sometimes Michael will catch him staring at himself in the mirror, poking different parts of his body and making a face
After eight years, Michael still doesn't understand it. He doesn't understand how Ryan can't see all things he frowns at are things Michael loves.
Sometimes he'll tell Ryan, when they're laying in bed. He'll trace Ryan's freckles with his finger and tell Ryan how much he loves them. Michael runs his hands over Ryan's thighs as he kisses over his stomach, tells him how much he's always loved his thighs, how he's perfect. When Ryan sleeps late Michael will kiss down Ryan back and stop at his dimples. He smiles at Ryan tell him they're my favorite. Ryan will just roll his eyes.
He tells Ryan how much he loves the sound of his voice, especially when he calls just to say "I love you". Sometimes even he's blown away when Ryan starts rattling off about the fashion line he's working on, spitting out the differences between the fabrics and a bunch of other stuff Michael has no idea about. He'll just smile at Ryan who will end up flushing and stop talking, no matter how much Michael tries to get him to start again.
Every once in a while Ryan reads something or hears something that hits a nerve. Michael can always tell because Ryan will say something like "I have no idea why you stuck out eight years with me" or "c'mon you're the greatest Olympian ever! Upgrade time dude". He'll laugh but Michael knows he doesn't think it's funny and worse, he's serious.
Michael wonders if Ryan will ever believe it, will ever see what he does. He wonders if ryan will ever realize that he doesn't want anyone else, that they were just made for each other, they fit perfectly.
He whispers it sometimes when he's holding Ryan close to him.
"You're so amazing Ry. I know you can't see it, you don't get it. You're so hard on yourself all the time but you shouldn't be. You're perfect. I love you. I love you so much. I wish you could see what I do."
Ryan never says anything. He lets Michael have the win for the moment. He presses his face into Michael's neck and whispers, "I love you too."
Author: agape_eternal
Pairing: Ryan Lochte/Michael Phelps
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Summary: All the little things Ryan hates, Michael loves.
Author Notes: basically the new One Direction song did this.
Feed Back: is ♥
If I let you know I'm here for you maybe you'll love yourself like I love you oh.. (AO3)
Michael has figured out that 95% of Ryan's fans generally feel two ways about him: he's stupid but he's hot and/or he's hot but a ho and ridiculously conceited.
Michael would laugh whenever he reads stuff like that if it didn't piss him off so bad. Ryan isn't stupid or a ho. Unless you count him being Michael's but that's beside the point.
What pisses Michael off more than what they say is that it actually hurts Ryan. A lot. Michael isn't sure why people haven't figured out that yes, he can see it and, whether people think he doesn't, he does. And it hurts.
Ryan comes off more confident than he's ever felt. Yes he's a three time Olympian, yes he did beat the competition by an amazing 3 seconds in the 400 IM. He's proud of his accomplishments.
But he still stands in the mirror and frowns.
He makes a face at the laugh lines next to his eyes and all his freckles. He still pokes at his thighs and frowns. He frowns at the way his stomach looks, the way he thinks it looks weird when he bends over, which he does repeatedly to prove his point. He still hates his back dimples, even though, most of the time, he can't see them.
He won't go shopping for weeks after a pair of jeans he loves run small and he can't fit into them the way he wants or someone makes another comment about his muffin top in one of his Speedo's, the way he's barely squeez into it.
He's taken being "healthy" as an excuse to count his calories meticulously. He counts everything down to the two bites of a sandwich he didn't finish because he was still "full" from breakfast. He sulks when he sees the numbers on the scale. So he ends up overworking himself but hides it behind the ridiculous number of Gatorade's he drinks, which he frowns at when he adds his calories up at night.
He cringes when he listens to an interview of his or sees himself on TV. He hates his voice, especially when it's recorded. He hates the shit he gets, which seemingly happens every single time he opens his mouth, even more. He thinks he sounds stupid himself, he's not surprised his fans do too.
Ryan doesn't talk about this to Michael much. He doesn't want a lecture of how he's nitpicking about himself, how he's worrying to much about what other people think. His dad gave him more than enough when he was younger. But sometimes he'll make an offhanded comment about the way his speedo fits. Sometimes Michael will catch him staring at himself in the mirror, poking different parts of his body and making a face
After eight years, Michael still doesn't understand it. He doesn't understand how Ryan can't see all things he frowns at are things Michael loves.
Sometimes he'll tell Ryan, when they're laying in bed. He'll trace Ryan's freckles with his finger and tell Ryan how much he loves them. Michael runs his hands over Ryan's thighs as he kisses over his stomach, tells him how much he's always loved his thighs, how he's perfect. When Ryan sleeps late Michael will kiss down Ryan back and stop at his dimples. He smiles at Ryan tell him they're my favorite. Ryan will just roll his eyes.
He tells Ryan how much he loves the sound of his voice, especially when he calls just to say "I love you". Sometimes even he's blown away when Ryan starts rattling off about the fashion line he's working on, spitting out the differences between the fabrics and a bunch of other stuff Michael has no idea about. He'll just smile at Ryan who will end up flushing and stop talking, no matter how much Michael tries to get him to start again.
Every once in a while Ryan reads something or hears something that hits a nerve. Michael can always tell because Ryan will say something like "I have no idea why you stuck out eight years with me" or "c'mon you're the greatest Olympian ever! Upgrade time dude". He'll laugh but Michael knows he doesn't think it's funny and worse, he's serious.
Michael wonders if Ryan will ever believe it, will ever see what he does. He wonders if ryan will ever realize that he doesn't want anyone else, that they were just made for each other, they fit perfectly.
He whispers it sometimes when he's holding Ryan close to him.
"You're so amazing Ry. I know you can't see it, you don't get it. You're so hard on yourself all the time but you shouldn't be. You're perfect. I love you. I love you so much. I wish you could see what I do."
Ryan never says anything. He lets Michael have the win for the moment. He presses his face into Michael's neck and whispers, "I love you too."