Fic: mermaid!Tazer AU (2/?)

[aeroport_art]

this part is dedicated to danacias because she is a horrible ho who is LEAVING ME FOR A WEEK TO GO TO HAWAII, TOTALLY LAME i hope she drowns and gets saved by mermaid!Tazer. or at least like, gets horrible sunburns that i can make fun of later.

Part 1

Comments

[puckling]

“Jesus Christ-why the fuck would you be able to see my dick?”

Patrick raises an eyebrow. “What it like, retracts and stuff? Holy shit, that’s weird.”

The merman’s face goes all pinched, like he’s too good for this conversation. Whatever. But when he tosses a wistful look at the water behind him so Patrick quickly adds, “I mean, my dick is always hanging out.”

The look of disgust isn’t exactly what he was going for, but at least he’s got the merman’s attention back on him. “I mean, it’s not just me,” Patrick rambles. “All guys hang out. Like, human guys. I mean, our dicks get bigger and stuff when we’re turned on, and I know some dudes have foreskin, which is this thing that-“

“Oh my god, shut up,” the merman says, sounding ill.

WOT IS THIS MAGNIFICENCE?

[aeroport_art]

BY MAGNIFICENCE YOU MEAN SHEER HORRIBLENESS, RIGHT? BECAUSE THIS ENTIRE EXCHANGE IS HORRIBLE

[puckling]

CAN'T IT BE BOTH AT THE SAME TIME?

[aeroport_art]

ISN'T HE?? and i don't know why mermaid!tazer is super frenchy, but it just seems like. mermaidy to speak french. REASONING, I AM GOOD AT IT

[honeyrue]

oh my goodness, this is my newest FAVORITE THING. disgruntledmermaid!Tazer is so, so adorable, as is kaner throwing himself into the water over and over again just to see him and ugh, their pitch-perfect awkward conversations and HELP, IT'S ALL SO PRECIOUS.

[aeroport_art]

Thanks, dearie! This story is hardly a work of art or like, you know, entirely readable? So I appreciate it that much more the fact that you're following along :D

[liketheroad]

Waaaa I don't know what to do with the level of sheer DELIGHT every word of this gives me. FRENCH SWEARING, DISGRUNTLED MERMAN TAZER IS THE TAZER OF MY DREAMS *_______*

[aeroport_art]

HEEHEE even if johnny's French is all weird and Canadian and stoic, it's still insanely hot. *dreamy sigh*