Battlestar GUHlactica!
Why You Should Watch Battlestar Galactica: An essay in picspam form.
When I say Battlestar Galactica, you may think of the cheesy sci-fi show from the late 70's, which was produced in the wake of Star Wars, and contained lots of feathered hair and gold-trimmed capes. At least I know that's what I used to think it was. Nerd fodder. Nothing more.
This is not the show I am talking about. In fact, from what I understand, the new BSG bears very little resemblance to the original series, and you should basically forget about any of the preconceived notions you may have. Contrary to popular belief, this show is not like Star Trek with hotter actors. It's something very different altogether.
(NOT dial-up safe.)
Let's start from the beginning. Back in the day, humans created Cylons: robots meant to help us out.
Eventually the Cylons' intelligence surpassed our own, and the humans and the Cylons had a war. The Cylons lost, and disappeared for 40 years.
Humans thought they were gone.
The humans were wrong.
The Cylons had evolved. Now instead of looking like robots, they looked like us. And they were pissed. And they wanted the human race wiped from the universe.
And this is where the BSG Mini-Series begins. The Cylons nuked the hell out of every place humans lived. Almost everyone died. The only survivors were people that happened to be in space at the time of the attack.
There were only 40,000 of them. 40,000 people left of the entire human race.
And they are in a fleet of ships. One of which is the Battlestar Galactica, which is kind of like the equivalent of one of those old warcraft ships that sits in the dock of a city as a tourist attraction. But now instead of being a museum, they have to actually use it to defend the last of the people in the universe.
Still with me?
Let's introduce the characters.
This is Commander Adama and Colonel Tigh. They are in charge of the Battlestar.
They are basically responsible for the safety of the human race. If they don't stop the fleet from being attacked, people won't exist any more. No pressure.
The Commander is one of those stern hardasses with a heart of gold. Colonel Tigh is an alcoholic asshole. They are BFFs.
This is Laura Roslin, President of the Fleet.
When the Cylons attacked, all 37 people ahead of her in line to be President were killed. She was the Secretary of Education. Lots of people don't think she should be the president. She is full of surprises, this one. She was also diagnosed with cancer the day of the Cylon attack.
This is Dr. Gaius Baltar, a scientific genius and a celebrity (think a modern day Einstein), and his lady friend, Six.
Six is a Cylon. Gaius didn't always know she was a Cylon, but he does now. Six likes to mess with Gaius's mind in very sneaky, sinister ways. Gaius is both a villain and comic relief. He is in love with himself, he only makes decisions that will help himself in the end, and he is the horniest man...ever. Six helps him out with that.
I can't say any more about them at the moment, but you learn very quickly that their relationship isn't a normal one. At all.
Her name is Six because she is the 6th model of Cylon. There are 12 models. However, there are many copies of each model. So there are lots of Sixes running around.
Point of interest: Some Cylons don't know that they are Cylons. They have been programmed to think they are real people. That can be quite a rude awakening for someone who all of the sudden learns they are actually a robot and not a human.
For that reason, Six is the only Cylon I will point out. Because the rest are a surprise :D
This is Kara "Starbuck" Thrace and Lee "Apollo" Adama.
Starbuck used to be engaged to Apollo's brother back in the day, but he's been dead for years. She is feisty and flawed and doesn't take shit from anyone. She's the Galactica's best pilot.
Apollo is the kind of guy that always wants to do what's right. He is a born leader, whether he realizes it or not. We all love Apollo.
Starbuck and Apollo have a rocky relationship. But their chemistry cannot be denied. They have a tendency to talk really close to each other's faces, which is always nice. Observe:
Apollo is also the Commander's son.
They have a...difficult relationship. Before the Cylon attack, they had been estranged for a long time. Now they have to learn how to deal with each other all over again.
This is Sharon "Boomer" Valerii.
Sharon's character is very twisty and wonderful, but unfortunately anything else I tell you will spoil everything. So. Just know her character is eeeenteresting.
This is Karl "Helo" Agathon.
He is a very noble, stand up guy. His bravery and his habit of always doing the right thing will make you swoon. Also, he has v. nice arms.
This is Galen "Chief" Tyrol.
Chief is a loyal, tough, and fair. He is the Galactica's deck manager, which means he's in charge of maintaining the ship's Vipers and Raptors, which are what Starbuck and Apollo fly. Chief is the kind of guy who make people feel safe just by being around.
Eye Candy
Let's not kid ourselves. BSG is full of hotties. We need to take a moment and appreciate them.
Jamie Bamber, aka Apollo
Apollo often finds himself without a shirt. And when he is wearing a shirt, luckily for us, it doesn't have any sleeves.
This man is ridiculously adorable. And British. Although on the show he speaks in an American accent. Too bad.
Tahmoh Penikett, aka Helo
You cannot deny the Helo love.
Katee Sackhoff, aka Starbuck
Starbuck may be a tomboy, but don't let it fool you. Katee is a total hottie.
Tricia Helfer, aka Six
I think this woman would cause more heterosexual females to go gay than anyone else I've ever come across. She is ridiculous.
James Callis, aka Gaius Baltar
Who can be really adorable, even while sporting a Jesus beard.
Grace Park, aka Sharon
Who is also gorgeous.
Callum Keith Rennie, aka Leoben
Alessandro Juliani, aka Gaeta
Michael Trucco, aka Anders
Who is always dirty and/or sweaty.
Aaron Douglas, aka Chief
Paul Campbell, aka Billy
To boil it down, this show has a little bit of everything.
It's one part Action/War Story.
It's one part Friendship/Connections between people.
It's one part Family Drama.
It's one part Mythological Fairy Tale.
It's one part Psychological Thriller.
It's one part Romance Sex.
It's one part Top Gun.
One part Star Wars.
And one part West Wing.
It's about addiction.
And salvation.
It's about loyalty.
And betrayal.
In short: It's frakking epic. Yes, it's about robots, and yes, it's about space. But it's not a bunch of men with feathered hair and capes gallivanting around fake sets in lycra unitards. It's no more nerdy than Lost or Heroes, or any other hour-long action/drama. It's probably the best new show I've seen since Lost.
So say we all.
When I say Battlestar Galactica, you may think of the cheesy sci-fi show from the late 70's, which was produced in the wake of Star Wars, and contained lots of feathered hair and gold-trimmed capes. At least I know that's what I used to think it was. Nerd fodder. Nothing more.
This is not the show I am talking about. In fact, from what I understand, the new BSG bears very little resemblance to the original series, and you should basically forget about any of the preconceived notions you may have. Contrary to popular belief, this show is not like Star Trek with hotter actors. It's something very different altogether.
(NOT dial-up safe.)
Let's start from the beginning. Back in the day, humans created Cylons: robots meant to help us out.
Eventually the Cylons' intelligence surpassed our own, and the humans and the Cylons had a war. The Cylons lost, and disappeared for 40 years.
Humans thought they were gone.
The humans were wrong.
The Cylons had evolved. Now instead of looking like robots, they looked like us. And they were pissed. And they wanted the human race wiped from the universe.
And this is where the BSG Mini-Series begins. The Cylons nuked the hell out of every place humans lived. Almost everyone died. The only survivors were people that happened to be in space at the time of the attack.
There were only 40,000 of them. 40,000 people left of the entire human race.
And they are in a fleet of ships. One of which is the Battlestar Galactica, which is kind of like the equivalent of one of those old warcraft ships that sits in the dock of a city as a tourist attraction. But now instead of being a museum, they have to actually use it to defend the last of the people in the universe.
Still with me?
Let's introduce the characters.
This is Commander Adama and Colonel Tigh. They are in charge of the Battlestar.
They are basically responsible for the safety of the human race. If they don't stop the fleet from being attacked, people won't exist any more. No pressure.
The Commander is one of those stern hardasses with a heart of gold. Colonel Tigh is an alcoholic asshole. They are BFFs.
This is Laura Roslin, President of the Fleet.
When the Cylons attacked, all 37 people ahead of her in line to be President were killed. She was the Secretary of Education. Lots of people don't think she should be the president. She is full of surprises, this one. She was also diagnosed with cancer the day of the Cylon attack.
This is Dr. Gaius Baltar, a scientific genius and a celebrity (think a modern day Einstein), and his lady friend, Six.
Six is a Cylon. Gaius didn't always know she was a Cylon, but he does now. Six likes to mess with Gaius's mind in very sneaky, sinister ways. Gaius is both a villain and comic relief. He is in love with himself, he only makes decisions that will help himself in the end, and he is the horniest man...ever. Six helps him out with that.
I can't say any more about them at the moment, but you learn very quickly that their relationship isn't a normal one. At all.
Her name is Six because she is the 6th model of Cylon. There are 12 models. However, there are many copies of each model. So there are lots of Sixes running around.
Point of interest: Some Cylons don't know that they are Cylons. They have been programmed to think they are real people. That can be quite a rude awakening for someone who all of the sudden learns they are actually a robot and not a human.
For that reason, Six is the only Cylon I will point out. Because the rest are a surprise :D
This is Kara "Starbuck" Thrace and Lee "Apollo" Adama.
Starbuck used to be engaged to Apollo's brother back in the day, but he's been dead for years. She is feisty and flawed and doesn't take shit from anyone. She's the Galactica's best pilot.
Apollo is the kind of guy that always wants to do what's right. He is a born leader, whether he realizes it or not. We all love Apollo.
Starbuck and Apollo have a rocky relationship. But their chemistry cannot be denied. They have a tendency to talk really close to each other's faces, which is always nice. Observe:
Apollo is also the Commander's son.
They have a...difficult relationship. Before the Cylon attack, they had been estranged for a long time. Now they have to learn how to deal with each other all over again.
This is Sharon "Boomer" Valerii.
Sharon's character is very twisty and wonderful, but unfortunately anything else I tell you will spoil everything. So. Just know her character is eeeenteresting.
This is Karl "Helo" Agathon.
He is a very noble, stand up guy. His bravery and his habit of always doing the right thing will make you swoon. Also, he has v. nice arms.
This is Galen "Chief" Tyrol.
Chief is a loyal, tough, and fair. He is the Galactica's deck manager, which means he's in charge of maintaining the ship's Vipers and Raptors, which are what Starbuck and Apollo fly. Chief is the kind of guy who make people feel safe just by being around.
Eye Candy
Let's not kid ourselves. BSG is full of hotties. We need to take a moment and appreciate them.
Jamie Bamber, aka Apollo
Apollo often finds himself without a shirt. And when he is wearing a shirt, luckily for us, it doesn't have any sleeves.
This man is ridiculously adorable. And British. Although on the show he speaks in an American accent. Too bad.
Tahmoh Penikett, aka Helo
You cannot deny the Helo love.
Katee Sackhoff, aka Starbuck
Starbuck may be a tomboy, but don't let it fool you. Katee is a total hottie.
Tricia Helfer, aka Six
I think this woman would cause more heterosexual females to go gay than anyone else I've ever come across. She is ridiculous.
James Callis, aka Gaius Baltar
Who can be really adorable, even while sporting a Jesus beard.
Grace Park, aka Sharon
Who is also gorgeous.
Callum Keith Rennie, aka Leoben
Alessandro Juliani, aka Gaeta
Michael Trucco, aka Anders
Who is always dirty and/or sweaty.
Aaron Douglas, aka Chief
Paul Campbell, aka Billy
To boil it down, this show has a little bit of everything.
It's one part Action/War Story.
It's one part Friendship/Connections between people.
It's one part Family Drama.
It's one part Mythological Fairy Tale.
It's one part Psychological Thriller.
It's one part Romance Sex.
It's one part Top Gun.
One part Star Wars.
And one part West Wing.
It's about addiction.
And salvation.
It's about loyalty.
And betrayal.
In short: It's frakking epic. Yes, it's about robots, and yes, it's about space. But it's not a bunch of men with feathered hair and capes gallivanting around fake sets in lycra unitards. It's no more nerdy than Lost or Heroes, or any other hour-long action/drama. It's probably the best new show I've seen since Lost.
So say we all.