I'm so sorry about what you're going through. I guess in order to move you, you may have to accept that he wont take responsibility for what he did, not that you agree with it, but knowing that he probably never will. You know what I mean. In the meantime, just know that it definitely was not your fault.
I'm glad that you're writing about it instead of keeping it inside and letting the pain fester. In time, you will feel better.
what matters is that you're strong. and it doesn't make the pain of knowing he won't admit to what he's done go away, but you were strong enough to confront him. and i believe, deep down, that he knows what he's done but he's not strong enough to admit it and face that because it's too much for him to handle - but try to get some satisfaction in knowing that you're stronger than him now, that you're above him in the sense that you faced him, you confronted him - you were strong enough to do that. you can't change others but i can see you changing because before i don't think you saw the courage in you to do something such as this. and now you know you have that strength and courage. and i hope you keep that in mind. but it's not your fault. you say it was manipulation, so how could it be your fault? you were trying to help him out, and he hurt you - so the guilt shouldn't be on you. you did nothing wrong, dear. part of you knows this, try to start listening to that part of you.
"I hate what I did, but I can not undo what I have done I'm sorry for all of this It's all my fault... but please dont say that I forced you to do the deed I know I pushed you... but I didnt force you to"
I know how it feels to have someone say that to you. My step brother, attemped 2 rape me when I was 13 and he just laughed about it, 2 of my best friends together, did things to me that I cant forget, and it hurts when they say how you asked for it and that they did nothing wrong. My ex boyfriend forced me to have sex more then once, and even tho i try I cant get it out of my head, im 19 now, and since I was 13 - until just recently this has been going on. I try to be strong, but I guess im use to this sort of behavior, 2 of my sisters have also been abused as well as my mother, and I think that I deserve this in some way.
It is important that you stay strong, you know what he did, and so does he, your just strong enough to admit it.
Comments 6
I'm so sorry about what you're going through. I guess in order to move you, you may have to accept that he wont take responsibility for what he did, not that you agree with it, but knowing that he probably never will. You know what I mean. In the meantime, just know that it definitely was not your fault.
I'm glad that you're writing about it instead of keeping it inside and letting the pain fester. In time, you will feel better.
Hugs & take care
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but it's not your fault. you say it was manipulation, so how could it be your fault? you were trying to help him out, and he hurt you - so the guilt shouldn't be on you. you did nothing wrong, dear. part of you knows this, try to start listening to that part of you.
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*huggles* <3
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I'm sorry for all of this
It's all my fault... but please dont say that I forced you to do the deed
I know I pushed you... but I didnt force you to"
that is exactly what my ex, always said.
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My step brother, attemped 2 rape me when I was 13 and he just laughed about it, 2 of my best friends together, did things to me that I cant forget, and it hurts when they say how you asked for it and that they did nothing wrong. My ex boyfriend forced me to have sex more then once, and even tho i try I cant get it out of my head, im 19 now, and since I was 13 - until just recently this has been going on. I try to be strong, but I guess im use to this sort of behavior, 2 of my sisters have also been abused as well as my mother, and I think that I deserve this in some way.
It is important that you stay strong, you know what he did, and so does he, your just strong enough to admit it.
Reply
*huggles*
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