002 ♋ text

[nonlineartroll]

CONSIDER THIS A MEMO TO ALL OF YOU. PAGING EVERY FUCKING ASSHOLE OUT THERE IN RUMPUS RESPITE LAND ALSO KNOWN AS ABAX: THE HUMAN CITY WHERE NO ONE KNOWS ANYTHING TO THIS FUCKING POST. AND BEFORE ANY OF YOU WHO ARE FAMILIAR WITH THE WORDS 'PROSPIT' AND 'DERSE' START, I'M ONLY BANNING ANYONE WHO COMMENTS TO THIS WITH STUPID FUCKING REMARKS

Comments

text;

[destroystosave]

What's a troll?

text; 1/IDEK HE'S ABOUT TO FIND OUT HE CAN'T BAN PEOPLE

[nonlineartroll]

I'M SORRY, ALL I READ WAS "OH, I'M USING THE HUMAN EMOTION CALLED 'SARCASM.' I'M VERY FUCKING CLEVER AND WITTY, LOOK AT ME ASK POINTLESS AND INANE QUESTIONS AND WASTE MY FUCKING TIME BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO BE FUCKING DOING. I AM BASICALLY SUCH A HUGE WASTE OF SPACE THAT I HAVE TO FUCKING COME INTO THIS MEMO AND WASTE YOUR TIME AS WELL.

LET US CELEBRATE OUR MUTUAL WASTE OF FUCKING TIME BY MUTUALLY STROKING EACH OTHER'S SHAME GLOBES AS I ATTEMPT TO ASSERT MY HUMAN HUMOR OVER YOU IN A SHOW OF DOMINANCE."

text;

[nonlineartroll]

EXCEPT I'M NOT FUCKING INTERESTED SO YOU CAN SAVE IT FOR SOMEONE WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK. NOW EXCUSE ME WHILE I LIVE UP TO MY PROMISE AND FREEZE THIS FUCKING COMMENT-

Re: text;

[nonlineartroll]

TEXT

[smoothstoned]

are trolls masterful in the ways of turning off capslock?

TEXT ahh i'm sorry i don't know how that got frozen. probably my keysmashing above sorry! ;;

[nonlineartroll]

NO. THIS IS HOW I FUCKING TYPE.

BUT PLEASE, CONTINUE BEING A CULTURALLY INSENSITIVE FUCK ASS. REALLY, IT'S DOING WONDERS TO IMPROVE MY OPINION ON THE REST OF YOUR RACE BASED ON THE UNFORTUNATE SHIT I SEE ON THIS FUCKING NETWORK.

TEXT I WAS PREPARED TO BE EXTREMELY OFFENDED naw had a feeling~

[smoothstoned]

but it's like screaming in my head. :(

no okay i'm seriously not trying to be insensitive dude and/or chica. there are like, troll-like creatures where i'm from and i doubt they have the mental capacity to type. so congrats on being one step ahead of them.

they aren't aliens though, so i guess that's a bit cooler too. props to that.

TEXT kasdjfkajf

[nonlineartroll]

HOW IS THIS SCREAMING IN YOUR HEAD? THEY ARE FUCKING WORDS. YOU READ THEM. WHY ARE YOU MAKING MOROSE FACES AT ME.

I'M MALE, AND IF THEY AFOREMENTIONED TROLLS ARE ANYTHING LIKE WHAT YOU'VE MENTIONED ABOVE I'M NOT FUCKING SURPRISED. ALL OF THE STORIES I'VE HEARD ARE VARYING DEGREES OF MORONIC SHIT CERTAIN IDIOTS ARE DETERMINED TO SPEW FROM THEIR FEED CHUTES.

WHY IS THAT A COOL THING? I DON'T FUCKING GET IT.

[snowwhitesoul]

So many words for such little information.

text 1/2

[nonlineartroll]

WOW, I HAVE SUSTAINED A HUMAN 'BURN.' A 'BURN' SO BAD MY WOUND IS LIKELY FESTERING AND OOZING A DISGUSTING PUSS. PERHAPS I SHOULD GO FIND A FUCKING ABRASION BINDING, WHILE I ATTEMPT TO RECOVER FROM THIS SICK 'BURN.'

text

[nonlineartroll]

NOW WHY DON'T YOU SAVE ME THE TROUBLE OF TYPING OUT MORE OF MY LARGE, UNWIEDLY WORDS THAT YOU ARE TOO DEFICIENT TO UNDERSTAND AND FUCK OFF ALREADY?

text

[snowwhitesoul]

While I consider myself comfortable with most human colloquialisms, I have no idea what kind of "burn" you speak of. However, since you seem to be so masterful with them, I would assume you know of another human idiom; "brevity is the soul of wit'.

[mew_p_s]

:33 < stay away???
:33 < *ac frowns at this purrn of events*
:33 < but i was just about to go check it out! it looks so shiny and purretty...

[nonlineartroll]

DID YOU MISS THE FUCKING POSTS EVERYONE HAS BEEN TYPING UP? IT'S MAKING PEOPLE FORGET THEIR MEMORIES AND MOST OF YOU DON'T REMEMBER HALF THE FUCKING SHIT THAT HAPPENED AS IT IS.

[mew_p_s]

:33 < *ac holds up a paw at karkitty asking him to hold please*
:33 < *she then purruses efurryone elses posts on the network as she was too busy to do so before*
:33 < well thats no fun at all! :((
:33 < fiiiine ill k33p away i guess
:33 < anyways! wheres the respite block going to be?
:33 < i havent b33n able to find a nice cave yet so ill go wherefur you want me to

[nonlineartroll]

KARKAT WAITS VERY FUCKING IMPATIENTLY WHILE WHISTLING OUT OF HIS SNORT BARREL. KARKAT IS AMAZED NO ONE ELSE GIVES ENOUGH OF A SHIT TO PAY ATTENTION TO THESE KINDS OF THINGS BESIDES HIM.

OH, CAN I TALK NORMALLY NOW? THANK YOU. IF YOU NEED TO CLIMB SO FUCKING BAD, THERE'S OTHER TREES IN THE AREA. JUST STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THE LAKE.

ONE OF THE HUMAN HIVES CALLED APARTMENTS. I HAVEN'T FOUND ANY RECUPERACOONS BUT I GUESS IT DOESN'T MATTER. I'M NOT SURE WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF WE WENT TO SLEEP HERE AND I DON'T REALLY WANT TO FUCKING FIND OUT.

[nonlineartroll]

WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO FUCKING DO WITH ANYTHING.

[nonlineartroll]

DIDN'T I JUST FUCKING EXPLAIN I AM NOT ONE OF YOUR SHITTY HUMAN EARTH TROLLS? I COULD HAVE FUCKING SWORN THAT WAS MY PRIMARY REASON FOR MAKING THIS ENTIRE FUCKING POST, BECAUSE I WAS FUCKING TIRED OF EXPLAINING TO ALL OF YOU THAT I AM NOT YOUR EARTH STANDARDS OF A TROLL.