“Beg to Differ”, End notes
[ Endnotes posted 06 Jun 2016 ]
Where did the idea for the story come from?
I’m frequently unable to answer that question, because I tend to get to my endnotes well after the story itself (in this instance, over ten years later) … but, as it happens, I actually can remember the basic genesis of the idea. Where it came from is a different matter - it popped into my mind seemingly out of nowhere - but while fully intending to do an entirely different story, I found myself inexplicably thinking of a 1971 Raquel Welch movie called “Hannie Caulder”, wherein a frontier woman wound up becoming a gunfighter. For some reason, the principles contained therein assumed some kind of prominence for me, and the question of how something like that could be adapted to BtVS took me in interesting directions.
Among other things: since some women - Slayers - are enormously stronger than men, the process of the ‘weaker’ sex taking on power led me to think of a man becoming stronger; since Hannie Caulder did it by becoming proficient with a man’s weapon (revolver), and in the Buffyverse Slayers are essentially the ultimate weapon, that would involve the man acquiring a Slayer as a weapon; but that had issues of subjugation that I didn’t especially like, plus I wanted to put a twist on it, so I made it a rogue Watcher commandeering the services of a female vampire.
One notion spun off another, until eventually - with the prompting of other ideas - I wound up with the story as it stands.
Is there any particular significance to the title?
Other than that the phrase was a signature line of Ted Buchanan [“Ted”, S2-11], and thus itself harked back to Buffy, no. It just seemed to be a nice tagline for the story.
What is the thing I like most about this story? the thing I like least, or about which I feel most doubtful?
What I enjoyed most was the process of letting the ‘core’ personalities (Spike, Xander) peek out through the language and behavior of Will and Allie, while keeping the basic underlying reality hidden till the proper moment. Also, if you want to come right down to it, I found the interpersonal dynamic between the two to be interesting in itself. I am annoyed and repulsed by ‘Spander’ (as much as by ‘Spuffy’, though the show itself eventually made that canon, albeit by depicting a horrendously dysfunctional relationship), but the clashing personalities of Spike and Xander actually work as well as - and using many of the same mechanics as - what we saw with Xander and Cordelia, and later Xander and Anya. So, in its own way, this story worked as a novel variation on an already familiar theme.
Also, I took a bit of pleasure in giving some actual significance to the frustrated near-end-of-ep question by third-Nancy* (“Beneath You”, S7-02), which was genuinely funny but had no justification anywhere in the Buffyverse history.
As far as liked least … that’s a question that always causes me problems, because if there’s something I don’t like in a story, I usually address it either in the writing or by later revision. If there was anything here that raised any doubts in me, it would be the sexual element. I’m a great fan of sex in my personal life, but my preferences go elsewhere when it comes to entertainment, particularly in my own writing. I’ve had stories where it was clear that people had had sex (sometimes in the classic draw-the-shades-and-then-jump-ahead-to-the-aftermath), but actually describing the act itself, even as vaguely as I did here, is not my normal habit. I did it here deliberately, as part of taking on new challenges and trying to stretch my horizons. I seriously doubt anyone would call it too graphic; it’s entirely possible that some people would feel If you can’t bring yourself to really get into it, you shouldn’t be doing it at all. This, however, is where I stand; I can do no other.
Is there anything I think I could have done better, or might do differently if I had it to do over?
A few people felt let down by the eventual revelation of the underlying reality; ‘bait and switch’ was how at least one person described it. Obviously I didn’t feel the same way about that, but I can understand how the discovery that this was a created - and ultimately rescinded - reality, might strike some as being along the lines of ‘but it was all a dream’. Would there be any way to do what I did, without triggering that feeling here and there? I don’t know. I regret that the effect was there, for however many felt it, but I honestly don’t see how I could do what I did in any other way and come to the same ending, which actually was what it was all about.
Do I have any plans to follow up on this story, or to use the character(s) or situation in a subsequent fic?
“Never say never” … but no, I not only don’t have any such plans, I don’t see how these characters could ever be used anywhere else.
All the same, there are connections. Gutrick was later mentioned in “ Learning Curve”; the Guzman twins (who were probably, but not certainly, the blondes sharing Jonathan’s bed in “Superstar” [S4-17]) were referenced in “ Otherwise a Perfect Sky”; and the Camber-Pyclet demon clan had been previously noted in “ Notes on an Opera Program”.
Any observations to add at the end?
A few minor things.
First, nwhepcat and bellatemple (both of whom were LJ friends at the time but fell out of contact with me later) provided much-welcome beta feedback before the story was posted for open reading. I seldom ask for beta contributions (except from sroni, who is a fine daughter and a writer of growing skill but not an accomplished beta-reader), but I profited from these.
Second … “Beg to Differ” garnered HUGE response at the time, but - though nominated several times - never won any kind of fandom award. It may be that the originality of the idea itself worked against it (how do you classify the story? it’s sorta S/X but-not-really, the characters are sorta OC but-not-really), or it may have been due to other things entirely that I simply wasn’t in a position to recognize. As it is, it remains for me a small mystery.
*First-Nancy was in “the Wish” [S3-09], followed by Nancy Doyle in “Earshot” [S3-18].