[for Kate]

[a_swan_diver]

Bella sat waiting at one of the little cafes the now Victorian island had given them to use. It was kind of nice, really, having this sort of place to hang out rather than the open, everyone watching kind of places that used to be on the island

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[girlsolo]

Somehow Girl Solo is suddenly Girl Power or Queen of the mini-Amazons with her own little blonde and occasionally brunette posse. She went from having no ties to a Sanctuary full of Abnormals to look after to having an island full of teenagers.

Eh, Abnormals are kind of like teenagers. Mostly like Nubbins with uncontrollable hormones. Or Bessa-whatevers that smear their food all over each other.

It's still weird to be getting notes from little chickadees who want her to meet them for girltalk or whatever, but it's kind of nice, too. Not that she's planning on admitting that to, oh, anyone. Ever.Kate finally finished sewing the lining (velvet) into a set of riding trousers, so she's wearing pants again, tall boots, a riding jacket, gloves and a way-too-long but totally kickass belted leather coat when she cruises into the cafe, orders coffee on her way by the counter, and pulls off her gloves. She sees Bella and directs the serverperson to the table and then heads over herself

[girlsolo]

It takes Kate a few seconds to parse out that she probably means one of the Victorian wives. She cocks her head, gaze narrowing, and asks, "Why? Is it some kind of religious thing with you or something else? You said he wasn't hurting you. Did someone else?"

Kate's been touched a lot of ways she's not thrilled about and she's let herself be touched or touched other people for a lot of reasons she's not proud of. But she's different than Bella. It's different, and if Bella's scared because she's been hurt, that's Will's department. Not hers.

[a_swan_diver]

"No, it's not a religious thing at all, and no one hurt me." No, Edward was always very careful to not hurt her, not touch her. Nearly a year together and all he'd ever done was kiss her for just that reason. Not hurting her. And now she was not only an 18 year old virgin, she was one that was terrified of the smallest touch.

"I dunno, Kate. Fear of the unknown? Pain, being bad at it? Hurting him because I don't know what's right and what's wrong? Being as inept there as I am with just about everything else? " Once she started, it all just kind of tumbled out.

[girlsolo]

After the relief passes and Kate's had time to get annoyed at how fast her coffee's gotten cold, Kate snorts. "People have been having sex since the beginning of time without anyone getting hurt for not knowing what to do. Half the fun of it's figuring it out."

She can't even remember how she felt the first time. Scared wasn't it. Determined maybe. "If you're using your mouth, don't close your teeth if you bite. If he's hard, don't try to bend it. Don't squeeze, smack, or hit the balls. Some people, guys and girls like back door entry. Make sure you oil up and go slow. Same goes when it's coming back at you. Some people like a little ow with their oh my god. Until you figure out if you're one of those people, keep the ow to little nips and lovebites."

[a_swan_diver]

"Oh my God," Bella said softly before slumping forward and burying her head in her hands. "Oh my GOD," she said again, muffled this time. "Please tell me there's a rock I can crawl under now?"

[girlsolo]

Kate laughs softly and pats Bella's shoulder. "What, you were expecting me to show you how to put a condom on a banana?" She can do that, too, but the stuff Bella's actually scared of isn't how to put a condom on. It's the stuff Kate just answered. Probably.

"Look at it this way. Now you know you can ask me anything. Fire away."

[a_swan_diver]

"No, I did that in tenth grade health class but yeah. You've covered everything I'd never imagined I'd ever ask anyone. Ever," Bella laughed, slowly straightening. To be honest, she'd already filed away a few of the things Kate said about handling the part she wasn't supposed to name. That might come in handy later...she hoped.

"How bad does it hurt?" She'd asked for this, she was by God going to see it through.

[girlsolo]

"That depends on a lot of things. Like how you get yourself off, if you do. Sports, stuff like that." It hadn't hurt her first time, but there'd been a lot of alcohol involved. "Even if it hurts at first, just breathe through it. It'll be okay. You'll be a little sore the next day, maybe, but a warm bath can help. Magnus would recommend Epsom salts. No bubble bath, though."

She signals a roving waitron with one of those big coffee carafes and gets a refill, then continues, "If you want my advice, take your time. Let him use his fingers or his mouth first. Get used to how it feels to have something in you like that. The less scared you are, the less it's going to hurt. Besides, getting each other off is fun."

[a_swan_diver]

It was just too mortifying to admit she'd never done even that much, so she just nodded, and kept nodding as she made mental note of everything Kate said. There was embarrassment, yeah, but under it was excitement, too. Anticipation.

And the memory of how his hands felt on her body.

"Okay. Next question. How do I know if what I'm doing is wrong, like if he doesn't want to hurt my feelings and tell me I'm doing it wrong?"

[girlsolo]

"Okay." Kate holds up her hand, smirking slightly at the obvious flash of memory and arousal. "Do me a favor and keep your flipfile firmly closed and your hands and arms on the table until this conversation comes to a complete and final stop."

It'd be cute, but there's some things Kate doesn't need to know about Bella. She shakes her head, not quite laughing at her, but there's laughter in her voice when she says, "He's a guy. If he's not into it, trust me, you'll know." In case Bella's not following, she mimes a dick getting soft with her index finger.

[a_swan_diver]

The mime has her giggling just a little. Well, the mime and Kate's insinuation that she'd be doing...anything under the table. God. In public? Really? She didn't want to know.

Instead, she nodded and drank the last of her now stone-cold chocolate and stared into the bottom of it. Another memory hit her, something that was so incongruous at the time and now made her wonder if there was something wrong with her. "Is it sometimes...I mean, everything was going great and then, I dunno. It almost felt like I was scared, but I knew I wasn't. Like I was waiting for something, you know? Like expectant but not really." Bella sighed. "I'm not making any sense."

[girlsolo]

"Are you serious?" Kate's eyes widen with disbelief and her jaw wants to drop maybe a little. She watches Bella for any signs she's kidding, but the girl keeps on talking and Kate has to work harder than usual not to laugh. "You are. How old are you

[a_swan_diver]

She managed to get through Kate's speech without her face catching fire, but for the life of her she had no idea how she did it. At least what she said, about the balloons popping, made sense. That was how it'd felt, like she was watching a balloon fill while also waiting for the pop. Scared and anxious at the same time.

"I didn't though, not really. Have the normal suburban life. I'm 18, but I've spent the last few years while I was living with my mom making sure we kept the bills paid and groceries in the house when I lived with my mom, then I was with. Well. You know. Our relationship wasn't physical and he was the first. I mean. Yeah, I never really dated much." She tried to say it more blase than anything, but she knew it just sounded pathetic.

"Okay. So. Good news is, everything I was feeling was right, I just didn't know what it was at the time. That's something, right?" she asked hopefully.

[girlsolo]

"B," Kate says, and this time her tone is kind of gentle. Like when she talks to Thad and he's freaked out about something. "Try not to stress about it. Sex should be fun. It's not like a test or anything. Because you're not trying to get the right answers and move on."

With the way she uses - used, before Declan - sex, it might sound hypocritical. It's not. Even when she's getting some for distraction, it's more than checking boxes to get an O.

"It's like playing a game or a sport you really love. Something you want to do again and again and try new moves and get better at old ones. Don't make it into a big deal. Don't make him into too big a deal. Just enjoy it."

[a_swan_diver]

Bella laughed at that one. "Lets not use the sports analogies? I almost gave a girl a concussion in gym class once and I'd really rather not end up trying to get close to Craig then have to get a stupid ghost carriage to take him to the clinic. That'd kind of kill the romance of it." She took a deep breath, blew it out slowly. "So. Just go with the flow and have fun. I think I can give that a shot."

She was pretty sure not making him into a big deal was going to be the more difficult task, but she was determined to try.

[girlsolo]

Laughing a little, Kate rolls her eyes. "I'm going to have to teach you more than sex, obviously." Like how to defend herself if this Craig or Druitt or anyone else comes after her. But it can wait. Kate can watch her back while Bella enjoys this.

"But yeah, pretty much. Don't be afraid to say what you like and don't like. That's totally cool and a lot of guys really dig it. They don't like being in the dark either. And since the whole point is to feel good together, it's no good tolerating something that's okay instead of making it as good as it can be."