[FIC] The Smiling Merman (first chappie, fanart included!!)
Title: The Smiling Merman (chap 01)
Author: a1y_puff
Pairing: TezuFuji, as usual… might include other pairings later.
Genre: parody/romance
Rating: G
Sumary: a parody of the little mermaid. Fuji was a merman who found interest to a certain stoic Prince named Tezuka xD
Warning: Shonen Ai, AU!
Disclaimer: PoT and it’s characters aren’t mine. Neither “The Little Mermaid”. I’m so sad >.<
Special thanks to moehoshi for proofreading and Lizzie for beta-ing ^^
A/N: Okay, so this is part of “The Fairytale Project” I’m doing with Ann (tacuma811) xD. I’m doing ‘The Smiling Merman’, while she made ‘Syuu White’. She’ll post hers later ^^
Oh, and this is my B’Day gift for Ann! So before you guys start reading this, let’s wish her a happy birthday first, nee!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANN!!!
Okay, thank you. Now, a few notes before you read:
1. I will address Fuji as ‘merman’ since he is a male.
2. For the females, I will use ‘mermaid’.
3. To address their species, I’m borrowing the term ‘merfolk’ from ‘Dungeon and Dragon’ and ‘Legend of Zelda’.
4. there is an accompanying fanart for this chapter!! it's after the chappie x3
-Chapter 1-
STORMY ENCOUNTER
It was another boring day for merman, Fuji Shuusuke. Sure, life deep under the sea was beautiful. There were many colorful and friendly fishes, many beautiful corals, and also some sharks he had managed to tame and now had become his pet. Kinda.
But if you saw the same view every single day since the day you were born, even if it was beautiful, you would get bored at some point, wouldn’t you? And Fuji’s daily activities were always the same. He woke up at morning, went to school (yes, merfolk go to school too, mind you.) After school, he would just swim around the sea and say hi to some of his friends, whether they were merfolk or fishes or octopuses whatsoever. Fuji was popular around his neighborhood for he was always smiling. Thus, he earned the title “The Smiling Merman”.
Not only he had a friendly display on his face, Fuji was also beautiful. Though he was a male, he had pretty face with soft, long honey brown hair and beautiful rarely-open azure eyes. His fins were the color of sky blue. He was very intelligent too. He was attractive to both male and female merfolk.
He had many fans, of course. They usually followed him around in school or ask him to hang out somewhere else. But they did not know that contrary to his friendly smile, Fuji did not really like being surrounded by people-merefolk, in this matter.
So at times, when he felt the need to be alone, he would swim to a place far from his home and school. Sometimes, he would visit the remnants of some shipwrecked ships, collecting some stuffs he believed he had no use of but he still collected them simply because they were unique.
He sometimes wished he had legs so he could venture on land. He wanted to know what the grounds were like. His teacher once said that they, merfolk, should never go to the land. Furthermore, they should never show up in front of a human. Humans were terrible beings, they were told. Humans were foolish; they created terrible things and destroyed the nature. Humans were weak, so they got easily scared of anything different from them thinking that they were threats. Merfolk were different than humans. No doubt humans would feel threatened and they would do something terrible to the merefolk if they ever knew of their existence.
Humans were also dense, so merfolk should NOT fall in love with them. There was a tale from a long time ago about a mermaid who fell in love with a human. She was willing to sacrifice her beautiful voice just so she could have legs and could go to meet the man she fell in love with. But the man was so ungrateful and oblivious to the mermaid's love for him that he married another girl, a princess for that matter, and let the mermaid die as she turned to bubbles in the sea.
Fuji always thought that that mermaid was foolish. He had heard of the tale a hundred times already and never understood why she didn’t just kill off the prince. What good had he if he was so ungrateful anyway? Was it worth to trade your life for someone who betrayed your heart? What was that so-called love that had always been the said reason for that sad love-story? Fuji never knew. And he thought he would never know.
It was nighttime already, Fuji could tell. It should be safe to swim to the surface now, just for a change of view. It was supposed to be a full moon that night. So, he swam a little far away from downtown to a more secluded area so that no one would find him, and then swam to the surface of the sea.
Slowly, he let his head out of the water. His hair was hovering around him. He observed his surroundings carefully. He was in the middle of the sea, no humans should be around.
“What are you doing here?” a familiar voice called him from behind. Fuji’s eyes snapped open in surprise and he promptly turned his head.
“Mou, An-chan… you surprised me,” Fuji smiled at the mermaid with shoulder-length hair, smiling at him. It was Tachibana An, sister of Tachibana Kippei, his good friend and rival.
“Oh? You were surprised?” she asked with a teasing smile. “So, what are you doing here, Fuji-san?” she asked again.
“I was just thinking I would watch the full moon… but it’s kinda cloudy, ne? Too bad.” he answered. “What about you?” he asked back.
“The same with you, perhaps?” she answered.
Fuji smiled. He knew that his junior was curious about humans and the life above the sea, just like him. If her brother found out, though, he wouldn’t like it to see his sister sneaking out at night like this.
“Your brother must be looking for you,” Fuji smiled.
“Well, don’t tell him, okay? I’ll get into trouble if he finds out about this little hobby of mine,” she said, laughing.
“I won’t.” Fuji promised.
“Hey, look at that! Isn’t that a ship?” An looked excited as she pointed to an object behind Fuji.
Fuji turned his head. “A ship? In this bad weather?”
“Oh, you know humans. They always feel superior towards nature. I Just wanted to see if there will be someone who will fall off his ship,” An said, laughing.
“Oh, you mean like that tale of the mermaid a long time ago?”
“Yeah… oh, wait! There’s another one!”
Fuji turned his head to the left and saw another ship sailing proudly against the strong wind.
“They just loved challenging nature, don’t they? Humans…” An mumbled.
Just as Fuji was about to comment, a thunder suddenly roared followed by heavy rain and merciless gales.
“Saa, this is a very sudden storm, isn’t it?” Fuji remarked calmly. “Ne, An-chan, we should probably go back…”
“Oh no! Someone really fell off the ship!” he heard An screamed and after mumbling something like, “Oh, great” with a sarcastic tone, the mermaid swam off to the direction of the second ship.
“Hey wait! What are you...” just before he could finish his words, he caught a glimpse of a falling figure from the other ship.
“Oh, God,” he cursed as he swam the opposite direction of where An had. Was the wind just too strong? Or did humans just HAD to fell off from their ships in the stormy sea?
Quickly, he dived to the sea as he saw the figure was drowning. ‘This is so troublesome,’ he thought. After some time of swimming with his eyes opened, he finally saw the figure that kept on falling deeper into the waters. He quickly swam towards the human that he figured was a man and grabbed his hand.
He pulled the man up to the surface just to find that he-they, were pretty far from the ship.
Fuji slung the man’s arm around his neck so that he wouldn’t drown. Now what was he supposed to do? He could just swim to the ship and bring the man back to his people, but he would be seen, and it wouldn’t be good.
He then looked around. There was a land to the north but it’s a bit far. Well, he had no choice anyway.
“This is really troublesome...” he murmured as he started to swim as fast as he could with a man clutched to him. He felt heavy, but he was not really a person to watch someone die when he could still do something. He had to swim fast and get the man to the land or he would die.
Eyes filled with determination, he then moved his tail faster and swam his way to the land.
***
“Gosh, I made it…” Fuji muttered as he breathed heavily. the storm had finally gone and the sun had shown himself when he managed to get to the beach and leaned the man against a big rock-or coral, whatever-near the beach.
He couldn’t get the man to the shore or he wouldn’t able to swim back to the sea because the water was too shallow. Here, it was deep enough for him to be able to move around freely, yet shallow enough so the man wouldn’t drown.
The man, he noticed, was pretty handsome. His hair was the color of dark brown, and it was soft when he touched it. He had an aristocrat nose, and he was tall too, from what he could tell. “You’re heavy, you know,” he said to the unconscious man.
There was no reply.
“Hey, are you even breathing?” he asked as he closed the distance between them. He put his ear on the man’s chest. There was a heartbeat, yet it was very weak. Then, he raised his right hand under the man’s nose.
He wasn’t breathing.
“Oh God, please don’t waste my effort of bringing you here! You can’t die now!” he said as he raised his right hand to slap the man’s face.
Slap! Slap! Slap!
No reaction aside of the man’s cheeks turning red from his slapping.
“Damn it,” he cursed under his breath. He tried to calm himself down. He had to think of something, but his brain would not cooperate. He was a genius for crying out loud!
Suddenly, he remembered something about CPR. He learned it at school, though he never really understood why they had to study it. The teachers only said ‘just in case’. Just in case of what? He was wondering back then, but now he was grateful he learned that.
Fuji had never practiced to do CPR before but he had to do it. He pinched the man’s nose, and caught the man’s lips with his.
1…2…3…
He checked the man’s pulse. Still weak.
He repeated his action. And after the third trial, the man coughed hard and spurted water from his mouth.
Fuji rubbed his back. “There, there… it’s okay, now,” he said with an assuring tone.
The man slowly raised his head. His eyes were half-open. It was when Fuji found out that the man’s eyes were the color of hazel. He looked like he wasn’t completely conscious.
Fuji quickly moved away from the man. He shouldn’t be seen. But then, he felt a light, weak grip on his wrist. Fuji spun his head.
“…you… are…?” the man asked weakly, his voice was deep and low and was almost like a whisper for the lack of energy.
Oh no, he had been seen. That’s bad… or not. Fuji smiled, his eyes opened, revealing the beautiful blue orbs that were rarely seen. “Saa, an angel?” he replied.
The man looked at him, tried to open his eyes more but he couldn’t. The grip on Fuji’s wrist loosened, and the man’s eyes were slowly closing again. “I… must be... dreaming...” were his last words before he fell unconscious again.
Fuji smiled again as he watched the unconscious man. His smile faltered as he raised his hand to stroke the man’s hair. He then leaned closer until his lips brushed the man’s ear and whispered.
“But I am real…”
He kissed the man, not knowing why he did it. He just wanted to. Then, he backed away a little before he added, “Though I would be flattered if I were to show up in your dream.”
Fuji then heard footsteps coming to his way, so he decided that he should go soon. He looked once again at the beautiful man and after one last smile, he dived to the sea and swam far away from there.
-To Be Continued...-
A/N: Uwaaah~~ Chapter 1 done! Please review if you read this. I’d like to know what you think about my first AU fic, onegaishimasu! And yes, Fuji had long hair here, but he’ll cut it off in the next chappie XD
Oh, and I made Tezuka 18, coz I think it’s the most suitable age for the story *laughs*
Oh, and if any of you are wondering what is Tachibana An doing there… actually I’m planning to slip in a little of hetero pairing ^^; I was about to make RyoSaku when moehoshi poked me with (censored) x An banner XD
And beside, it looks like many people don’t really like Sakuno, so I put An instead ^^;
By the way, here’s the teaser for the next chapter: Super Deluxe Inui Potion
***
“Are you in love with him?” Inui cut him off.
Fuji sighed. “Yumiko-neesan told me that too, but oh please, Inui. You’ve had known me for years. Do I look like I WILL fall in love at all? In the first sight?”
“According to my data, there is 0.04% chance of you ever falling in love at first sight-”
“See?”
“-but for all these years I’ve known you, you’ve always defies my data.”
Fuji was silent.
“Whether you've fallen in love or not is something you have to find out yourself, Fuji,” Inui said again. “Now, what if I tell you I can give you legs so you can go and meet him?”
***
That’s it! See you again in the next chapter and please review nee? oh, and please comment on the fanart too! here it is:
The man looked at him, tried to open his eyes more but he couldn’t. The grip on Fuji’s wrist loosened, and the man’s eyes were slowly closing again. “I… must be…. dreaming…” were his last word before he fell unconscious again.
Fuji smiled again as he watched the unconscious man. His smile faltered as he raised his hand to stroke the man’s hair. He then leaned closer until his lips brushed the man’s ear and whispered.
“But I am real…”
those with dA accounts, pls comment here: http://a1y-puff.deviantart.com/art/TezuFuji-Stormy-Encounter-77584754
the sparklies brush I got from http://www.brushes.obsidiandawn.com
LoL.. it turned out pretty good but if yuo squint a little, it's actually pretty messy T_T
I FAILED at backgrounds. I WANT more skill!
anyway, when I make this, my mom saw this, and she commented:
mom: "Oh, the tail coloring is nice. it's good."
me: "thanks"
mom: "the sea and sky are also good. this is a nice pic"
me: "thanks."
mom: "Hey, why dosn't the mermaid have boobs?"
me: *grins* because it's a 'he'. it's not a mermaid, it's a merman."
mom: "WHAT?!"
LoL.... anyway comment please, thanks!
Author: a1y_puff
Pairing: TezuFuji, as usual… might include other pairings later.
Genre: parody/romance
Rating: G
Sumary: a parody of the little mermaid. Fuji was a merman who found interest to a certain stoic Prince named Tezuka xD
Warning: Shonen Ai, AU!
Disclaimer: PoT and it’s characters aren’t mine. Neither “The Little Mermaid”. I’m so sad >.<
Special thanks to moehoshi for proofreading and Lizzie for beta-ing ^^
A/N: Okay, so this is part of “The Fairytale Project” I’m doing with Ann (tacuma811) xD. I’m doing ‘The Smiling Merman’, while she made ‘Syuu White’. She’ll post hers later ^^
Oh, and this is my B’Day gift for Ann! So before you guys start reading this, let’s wish her a happy birthday first, nee!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANN!!!
Okay, thank you. Now, a few notes before you read:
1. I will address Fuji as ‘merman’ since he is a male.
2. For the females, I will use ‘mermaid’.
3. To address their species, I’m borrowing the term ‘merfolk’ from ‘Dungeon and Dragon’ and ‘Legend of Zelda’.
4. there is an accompanying fanart for this chapter!! it's after the chappie x3
-Chapter 1-
STORMY ENCOUNTER
It was another boring day for merman, Fuji Shuusuke. Sure, life deep under the sea was beautiful. There were many colorful and friendly fishes, many beautiful corals, and also some sharks he had managed to tame and now had become his pet. Kinda.
But if you saw the same view every single day since the day you were born, even if it was beautiful, you would get bored at some point, wouldn’t you? And Fuji’s daily activities were always the same. He woke up at morning, went to school (yes, merfolk go to school too, mind you.) After school, he would just swim around the sea and say hi to some of his friends, whether they were merfolk or fishes or octopuses whatsoever. Fuji was popular around his neighborhood for he was always smiling. Thus, he earned the title “The Smiling Merman”.
Not only he had a friendly display on his face, Fuji was also beautiful. Though he was a male, he had pretty face with soft, long honey brown hair and beautiful rarely-open azure eyes. His fins were the color of sky blue. He was very intelligent too. He was attractive to both male and female merfolk.
He had many fans, of course. They usually followed him around in school or ask him to hang out somewhere else. But they did not know that contrary to his friendly smile, Fuji did not really like being surrounded by people-merefolk, in this matter.
So at times, when he felt the need to be alone, he would swim to a place far from his home and school. Sometimes, he would visit the remnants of some shipwrecked ships, collecting some stuffs he believed he had no use of but he still collected them simply because they were unique.
He sometimes wished he had legs so he could venture on land. He wanted to know what the grounds were like. His teacher once said that they, merfolk, should never go to the land. Furthermore, they should never show up in front of a human. Humans were terrible beings, they were told. Humans were foolish; they created terrible things and destroyed the nature. Humans were weak, so they got easily scared of anything different from them thinking that they were threats. Merfolk were different than humans. No doubt humans would feel threatened and they would do something terrible to the merefolk if they ever knew of their existence.
Humans were also dense, so merfolk should NOT fall in love with them. There was a tale from a long time ago about a mermaid who fell in love with a human. She was willing to sacrifice her beautiful voice just so she could have legs and could go to meet the man she fell in love with. But the man was so ungrateful and oblivious to the mermaid's love for him that he married another girl, a princess for that matter, and let the mermaid die as she turned to bubbles in the sea.
Fuji always thought that that mermaid was foolish. He had heard of the tale a hundred times already and never understood why she didn’t just kill off the prince. What good had he if he was so ungrateful anyway? Was it worth to trade your life for someone who betrayed your heart? What was that so-called love that had always been the said reason for that sad love-story? Fuji never knew. And he thought he would never know.
It was nighttime already, Fuji could tell. It should be safe to swim to the surface now, just for a change of view. It was supposed to be a full moon that night. So, he swam a little far away from downtown to a more secluded area so that no one would find him, and then swam to the surface of the sea.
Slowly, he let his head out of the water. His hair was hovering around him. He observed his surroundings carefully. He was in the middle of the sea, no humans should be around.
“What are you doing here?” a familiar voice called him from behind. Fuji’s eyes snapped open in surprise and he promptly turned his head.
“Mou, An-chan… you surprised me,” Fuji smiled at the mermaid with shoulder-length hair, smiling at him. It was Tachibana An, sister of Tachibana Kippei, his good friend and rival.
“Oh? You were surprised?” she asked with a teasing smile. “So, what are you doing here, Fuji-san?” she asked again.
“I was just thinking I would watch the full moon… but it’s kinda cloudy, ne? Too bad.” he answered. “What about you?” he asked back.
“The same with you, perhaps?” she answered.
Fuji smiled. He knew that his junior was curious about humans and the life above the sea, just like him. If her brother found out, though, he wouldn’t like it to see his sister sneaking out at night like this.
“Your brother must be looking for you,” Fuji smiled.
“Well, don’t tell him, okay? I’ll get into trouble if he finds out about this little hobby of mine,” she said, laughing.
“I won’t.” Fuji promised.
“Hey, look at that! Isn’t that a ship?” An looked excited as she pointed to an object behind Fuji.
Fuji turned his head. “A ship? In this bad weather?”
“Oh, you know humans. They always feel superior towards nature. I Just wanted to see if there will be someone who will fall off his ship,” An said, laughing.
“Oh, you mean like that tale of the mermaid a long time ago?”
“Yeah… oh, wait! There’s another one!”
Fuji turned his head to the left and saw another ship sailing proudly against the strong wind.
“They just loved challenging nature, don’t they? Humans…” An mumbled.
Just as Fuji was about to comment, a thunder suddenly roared followed by heavy rain and merciless gales.
“Saa, this is a very sudden storm, isn’t it?” Fuji remarked calmly. “Ne, An-chan, we should probably go back…”
“Oh no! Someone really fell off the ship!” he heard An screamed and after mumbling something like, “Oh, great” with a sarcastic tone, the mermaid swam off to the direction of the second ship.
“Hey wait! What are you...” just before he could finish his words, he caught a glimpse of a falling figure from the other ship.
“Oh, God,” he cursed as he swam the opposite direction of where An had. Was the wind just too strong? Or did humans just HAD to fell off from their ships in the stormy sea?
Quickly, he dived to the sea as he saw the figure was drowning. ‘This is so troublesome,’ he thought. After some time of swimming with his eyes opened, he finally saw the figure that kept on falling deeper into the waters. He quickly swam towards the human that he figured was a man and grabbed his hand.
He pulled the man up to the surface just to find that he-they, were pretty far from the ship.
Fuji slung the man’s arm around his neck so that he wouldn’t drown. Now what was he supposed to do? He could just swim to the ship and bring the man back to his people, but he would be seen, and it wouldn’t be good.
He then looked around. There was a land to the north but it’s a bit far. Well, he had no choice anyway.
“This is really troublesome...” he murmured as he started to swim as fast as he could with a man clutched to him. He felt heavy, but he was not really a person to watch someone die when he could still do something. He had to swim fast and get the man to the land or he would die.
Eyes filled with determination, he then moved his tail faster and swam his way to the land.
***
“Gosh, I made it…” Fuji muttered as he breathed heavily. the storm had finally gone and the sun had shown himself when he managed to get to the beach and leaned the man against a big rock-or coral, whatever-near the beach.
He couldn’t get the man to the shore or he wouldn’t able to swim back to the sea because the water was too shallow. Here, it was deep enough for him to be able to move around freely, yet shallow enough so the man wouldn’t drown.
The man, he noticed, was pretty handsome. His hair was the color of dark brown, and it was soft when he touched it. He had an aristocrat nose, and he was tall too, from what he could tell. “You’re heavy, you know,” he said to the unconscious man.
There was no reply.
“Hey, are you even breathing?” he asked as he closed the distance between them. He put his ear on the man’s chest. There was a heartbeat, yet it was very weak. Then, he raised his right hand under the man’s nose.
He wasn’t breathing.
“Oh God, please don’t waste my effort of bringing you here! You can’t die now!” he said as he raised his right hand to slap the man’s face.
Slap! Slap! Slap!
No reaction aside of the man’s cheeks turning red from his slapping.
“Damn it,” he cursed under his breath. He tried to calm himself down. He had to think of something, but his brain would not cooperate. He was a genius for crying out loud!
Suddenly, he remembered something about CPR. He learned it at school, though he never really understood why they had to study it. The teachers only said ‘just in case’. Just in case of what? He was wondering back then, but now he was grateful he learned that.
Fuji had never practiced to do CPR before but he had to do it. He pinched the man’s nose, and caught the man’s lips with his.
1…2…3…
He checked the man’s pulse. Still weak.
He repeated his action. And after the third trial, the man coughed hard and spurted water from his mouth.
Fuji rubbed his back. “There, there… it’s okay, now,” he said with an assuring tone.
The man slowly raised his head. His eyes were half-open. It was when Fuji found out that the man’s eyes were the color of hazel. He looked like he wasn’t completely conscious.
Fuji quickly moved away from the man. He shouldn’t be seen. But then, he felt a light, weak grip on his wrist. Fuji spun his head.
“…you… are…?” the man asked weakly, his voice was deep and low and was almost like a whisper for the lack of energy.
Oh no, he had been seen. That’s bad… or not. Fuji smiled, his eyes opened, revealing the beautiful blue orbs that were rarely seen. “Saa, an angel?” he replied.
The man looked at him, tried to open his eyes more but he couldn’t. The grip on Fuji’s wrist loosened, and the man’s eyes were slowly closing again. “I… must be... dreaming...” were his last words before he fell unconscious again.
Fuji smiled again as he watched the unconscious man. His smile faltered as he raised his hand to stroke the man’s hair. He then leaned closer until his lips brushed the man’s ear and whispered.
“But I am real…”
He kissed the man, not knowing why he did it. He just wanted to. Then, he backed away a little before he added, “Though I would be flattered if I were to show up in your dream.”
Fuji then heard footsteps coming to his way, so he decided that he should go soon. He looked once again at the beautiful man and after one last smile, he dived to the sea and swam far away from there.
-To Be Continued...-
A/N: Uwaaah~~ Chapter 1 done! Please review if you read this. I’d like to know what you think about my first AU fic, onegaishimasu! And yes, Fuji had long hair here, but he’ll cut it off in the next chappie XD
Oh, and I made Tezuka 18, coz I think it’s the most suitable age for the story *laughs*
Oh, and if any of you are wondering what is Tachibana An doing there… actually I’m planning to slip in a little of hetero pairing ^^; I was about to make RyoSaku when moehoshi poked me with (censored) x An banner XD
And beside, it looks like many people don’t really like Sakuno, so I put An instead ^^;
By the way, here’s the teaser for the next chapter: Super Deluxe Inui Potion
***
“Are you in love with him?” Inui cut him off.
Fuji sighed. “Yumiko-neesan told me that too, but oh please, Inui. You’ve had known me for years. Do I look like I WILL fall in love at all? In the first sight?”
“According to my data, there is 0.04% chance of you ever falling in love at first sight-”
“See?”
“-but for all these years I’ve known you, you’ve always defies my data.”
Fuji was silent.
“Whether you've fallen in love or not is something you have to find out yourself, Fuji,” Inui said again. “Now, what if I tell you I can give you legs so you can go and meet him?”
***
That’s it! See you again in the next chapter and please review nee? oh, and please comment on the fanart too! here it is:
The man looked at him, tried to open his eyes more but he couldn’t. The grip on Fuji’s wrist loosened, and the man’s eyes were slowly closing again. “I… must be…. dreaming…” were his last word before he fell unconscious again.
Fuji smiled again as he watched the unconscious man. His smile faltered as he raised his hand to stroke the man’s hair. He then leaned closer until his lips brushed the man’s ear and whispered.
“But I am real…”
those with dA accounts, pls comment here: http://a1y-puff.deviantart.com/art/TezuFuji-Stormy-Encounter-77584754
the sparklies brush I got from http://www.brushes.obsidiandawn.com
LoL.. it turned out pretty good but if yuo squint a little, it's actually pretty messy T_T
I FAILED at backgrounds. I WANT more skill!
anyway, when I make this, my mom saw this, and she commented:
mom: "Oh, the tail coloring is nice. it's good."
me: "thanks"
mom: "the sea and sky are also good. this is a nice pic"
me: "thanks."
mom: "Hey, why dosn't the mermaid have boobs?"
me: *grins* because it's a 'he'. it's not a mermaid, it's a merman."
mom: "WHAT?!"
LoL.... anyway comment please, thanks!