Chapter 2: Silence and Spoons
Title: Severus Snape and Life Before Potter
Chapter: 2 - Silence and Spoons
Characters: Original Female Character, Severus Snape, Eileen Snape
Author: a_silver_story
Genre This chapter is a little more on the "humorous" side.
Rating: Quite adult material throughout. This chapter isn't that bad.
Warnings: Angry mothers, spanking, spoons
Disclaimer: If I owned anything in this other than the OFC, I'd be a rich rich rich bitch. However, I am not a rich rich rich bitch so you may all, therefore, assume I own nothing. Which I don't. It all belongs to JK Rowling, in case any of you didn't know.
Summary Eileen Snape confronts her son about the way he deals with wayward children. Muahaha.
With a faint 'pop', Severus appeared out of thin air outside his front door, Evangeline clasped tightly in his arms. She was scowling her Death Scowl. He put her down, and tapped the bonds around her wrists with his wand and they fell to the ground. Seeing her chance, she bolted. Severus sighed.
"Accio child." he said lazily. She flew straight back into his waiting arms. She looked at him for a second a little dazed and confused, then proceeded to scream at the top of her lungs.
"Silencio." he muttered. The incessent wailing stopped. He put the now silenced child back on the floor and she folded her arms and glared up at him. "Don't bother trying to run away. It's not worth both our lives now is it?" She kicked him. He sighed again and opened the front door and shoved her none too gently inside. "Mum!" he shouted. "MUM!"
A middle-aged witch with a large, hooked nose and dark, greying hair came out of the living room. "Why," she demanded. "Is the new rug completely sopping wet?"
Severus felt his stomach plummet again. "She did it." he said, a little too quickly and pointing at Evangeline. The silencing charm was still active, so all she could manage by way of defence was an alarmed look and a melodramatically mouthed "did not!"
"Is that lil' Evangeline I spy there?" Said Mrs. Snape, her eyesight not what it was and having difficulty making out the little girl in the blue coat in her hallway. 'Lil' Evangeline' nodded enthusiastically, then ran forward to throw her arms around her Auntie Eileen. "What are you doing here, sweetie?"
"Death Eaters." she mouthed simply, and buried her head in Eileen's stomach. Eileen prised the child off her and turned to her son menacingly.
"Death Eaters?" she repeated. "Death Eaters? Care to explain, Severus?"
Severus shifted uncomfortably. "Uh," he stammered. "I ... ah ... I wasn't there! Me and Lucy Malfoy was having a lads' night in and the Mark started burning and we were totally plastered and it took us about fifteen minutes to get the sink full of water and ice to sober us up a bit -"
"So that's what happened to my rug!" Snapped Mrs. Snape. "Hmph! Carry on!"
"I ... uh ... well ...." he shifted again. "Um, well ... me and Lucius got there and the place was a mess. I didn't even know it was the Romero Estate until we were on the third floor! The rest of the Inner Circle was there, her parents and grandparents are dead but I managed to bargain with the Dark Lord to save her ... and ... um ... I'm her .... guardian now."
Eileen blinked. "Guardian? Why the bloody hell would he entrust a child to your care?"
"I know. It's really unfair of him, isn't it?"
His mother slapped him. "Unfair on the child! You've got about as much responsibility in you as a chicken's left foot!"
Evangeline giggled silently. "Have you lost the ability to speak, child?" asked Auntie Eileen, her voice tender again. Evangeline shook her head, pointed at Severus and then pointed at her throat and mimed waving a wand. Eileen got the message and grabbed hold of Severus' left ear and dragged him in to the kitchen. She took a wooden spoon and smacked him with it squarely on the arse.
"NEVER!" she screamed. "USE." smack. "SILENCING." smack. "CHARMS." smack. "ON." smack "CHILDREN!" smack. She let go of her son and he staggered slightly. Evangeline stood in the doorway to the kitchen, clutching her sides and shaking with silent laughter. Mrs. Snape withdrew her wand, pointed it at the girl and muttered the counter-charm. Evangeline collapsed in a fit of giggles on to the floor. Severus did not look in the least bit amused.
"She was screaming like a Banshee, Mum! She was trying to run away! Should I have let myself get arrested and you come home and find the Dark Mark hovering over the local police station?"
Eileen weighed up her choices. She pointed a calloused finger at him and jabbed him in the chest. "You're grounded for a month!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Severus spent the next two weeks confined to his bedroom. He could often hear Eileen and Evangeline laughing out in the garden having a picnic under the tree, downstairs in the living room or baking biscuits and cakes that never found their way up to him. He passed the time reading his Daily Prophet or reading up on rare potions ingredients. He finally wrote a short note to Lucius asking him about how he was and explaining why he wasn't allowed out for the next month.
Dear Lucius, he began.
Mum wasn't too pleased about the whole Romero fiasco. Got spanked with a spoon for using a Silencing charm on a child and grounded for a month. Honestly. I did the little witch a favour!
Anyhoo, can't wallow in self pity for too long! How are you? Write back soon - I'm bored to tears. I never thought my own company would be so dull!
Love,
Sev.
PS. I heard Narcissa and Bellatrix are fighting over who gets to lead you under the mistletoe. Lucky bastard!
PPS. A word of advice: If you value life, go for Bellatrix. She'll probably hex your balls off if you don't.
No sooner had Owl the owl swooped out of his open window than he heard the creak of footsteps on the stairs. He threw himself down on to his large double bed, folded his arms across his chest and glared at the door. Evangeline poked her head into the room.
"Auntie Eileen's going to Diagon Alley. She says I'm to stay up here with you while she's gone."
She hovered in the doorway, unsure what to do next. He decided to take a kinder approach and softened his expression as best he could. Without warning, she ran across the room and leapt straight into his arms, sobbing violently and shaking all over.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
An hour later, Evangeline and Severus were sharing biscuits and Evangeline was detailing everything she could remember about her parents. Severus remained silent and brooding throughout her recolletions, guilt knawing away at his stomach. Her face was tear-stained and puffy, but she was smiling and laughing as she talked about Mr. and Mrs. Romero. The biscuits were still warm from the oven, the heat leaving them slower than usual because of an insulation charm Eileen had put on them. They tasted exquisite.
Eventually, the little girl stretched, yawned, and started settling back into the pillows behind her.
"Oh no you don't!" said Severus. She looked at him blearily and shut her eyes, instantly falling asleep. For all the good it did, Severus scowled at her and folded his arms. Finally, he poked her. Nothing. The child was dead to the world. He sighed and took the biscuit tray off the covers and carried it quietly downstairs. Eileen had been gone for an hour and a half, by his reckoning, and would be back any time soon. He quickly slipped back upstairs and back into his bedroom. Evangeline had snuggled further under the covers than when he left her, and she looked content and peaceful.
He filled a small basin with warm water and took a cloth from the airing cupboard. He gently bathed the tears away from her sleeping face and dried it with a soft, fluffy green towel. He sighed again. The door shut of its own accord, meaning the wards Eileen had put in place to keep him grounded were whirring in to action. They probably sensed he'd left the room twice already. As suddenly as it had struck Evangeline, he felt exhausted and weary.
Severus shrugged of his black shirt, lay down gently on the bed next to Evangeline and waited for sleep to come. It was still light outside, but he felt sure a small nap wouldn't hurt. He watched the little girl asleep next to him until he finally drifted off into his own dreamland.
When he finally awoke, the sky was black and the stars were out. The house was quiet, and Evangeline was still asleep beside him. He glanced at the enchanted clock on his bedroom wall which told him it was 9pm. He felt confused for a moment, wondering why Eileen hadn't woken them for dinner.
Maybe we just looked too peaceful, he thought. She didn't want to disturb us ...
He pulled his crisp shirt back on to his shoulders and fastened a few buttons before trying his door. It opened easily. The wards had been taken off. He instantly knew something was wrong. He bolted down the stairs and in to the living room. It was empty. As was the kitchen, the dining room, the utility room and the draughty room their neighbouring muggles called "the garage". He checked his mother's sitting room. He ran up the stairs and checked the bathroom, the toilet room, her bedroom, the guest bedroom, even his own bedroom again just to make sure.
Eileen hadn't got back from Diagon Alley yet. His stomach plummeted.
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Chapter: 2 - Silence and Spoons
Characters: Original Female Character, Severus Snape, Eileen Snape
Author: a_silver_story
Genre This chapter is a little more on the "humorous" side.
Rating: Quite adult material throughout. This chapter isn't that bad.
Warnings: Angry mothers, spanking, spoons
Disclaimer: If I owned anything in this other than the OFC, I'd be a rich rich rich bitch. However, I am not a rich rich rich bitch so you may all, therefore, assume I own nothing. Which I don't. It all belongs to JK Rowling, in case any of you didn't know.
Summary Eileen Snape confronts her son about the way he deals with wayward children. Muahaha.
With a faint 'pop', Severus appeared out of thin air outside his front door, Evangeline clasped tightly in his arms. She was scowling her Death Scowl. He put her down, and tapped the bonds around her wrists with his wand and they fell to the ground. Seeing her chance, she bolted. Severus sighed.
"Accio child." he said lazily. She flew straight back into his waiting arms. She looked at him for a second a little dazed and confused, then proceeded to scream at the top of her lungs.
"Silencio." he muttered. The incessent wailing stopped. He put the now silenced child back on the floor and she folded her arms and glared up at him. "Don't bother trying to run away. It's not worth both our lives now is it?" She kicked him. He sighed again and opened the front door and shoved her none too gently inside. "Mum!" he shouted. "MUM!"
A middle-aged witch with a large, hooked nose and dark, greying hair came out of the living room. "Why," she demanded. "Is the new rug completely sopping wet?"
Severus felt his stomach plummet again. "She did it." he said, a little too quickly and pointing at Evangeline. The silencing charm was still active, so all she could manage by way of defence was an alarmed look and a melodramatically mouthed "did not!"
"Is that lil' Evangeline I spy there?" Said Mrs. Snape, her eyesight not what it was and having difficulty making out the little girl in the blue coat in her hallway. 'Lil' Evangeline' nodded enthusiastically, then ran forward to throw her arms around her Auntie Eileen. "What are you doing here, sweetie?"
"Death Eaters." she mouthed simply, and buried her head in Eileen's stomach. Eileen prised the child off her and turned to her son menacingly.
"Death Eaters?" she repeated. "Death Eaters? Care to explain, Severus?"
Severus shifted uncomfortably. "Uh," he stammered. "I ... ah ... I wasn't there! Me and Lucy Malfoy was having a lads' night in and the Mark started burning and we were totally plastered and it took us about fifteen minutes to get the sink full of water and ice to sober us up a bit -"
"So that's what happened to my rug!" Snapped Mrs. Snape. "Hmph! Carry on!"
"I ... uh ... well ...." he shifted again. "Um, well ... me and Lucius got there and the place was a mess. I didn't even know it was the Romero Estate until we were on the third floor! The rest of the Inner Circle was there, her parents and grandparents are dead but I managed to bargain with the Dark Lord to save her ... and ... um ... I'm her .... guardian now."
Eileen blinked. "Guardian? Why the bloody hell would he entrust a child to your care?"
"I know. It's really unfair of him, isn't it?"
His mother slapped him. "Unfair on the child! You've got about as much responsibility in you as a chicken's left foot!"
Evangeline giggled silently. "Have you lost the ability to speak, child?" asked Auntie Eileen, her voice tender again. Evangeline shook her head, pointed at Severus and then pointed at her throat and mimed waving a wand. Eileen got the message and grabbed hold of Severus' left ear and dragged him in to the kitchen. She took a wooden spoon and smacked him with it squarely on the arse.
"NEVER!" she screamed. "USE." smack. "SILENCING." smack. "CHARMS." smack. "ON." smack "CHILDREN!" smack. She let go of her son and he staggered slightly. Evangeline stood in the doorway to the kitchen, clutching her sides and shaking with silent laughter. Mrs. Snape withdrew her wand, pointed it at the girl and muttered the counter-charm. Evangeline collapsed in a fit of giggles on to the floor. Severus did not look in the least bit amused.
"She was screaming like a Banshee, Mum! She was trying to run away! Should I have let myself get arrested and you come home and find the Dark Mark hovering over the local police station?"
Eileen weighed up her choices. She pointed a calloused finger at him and jabbed him in the chest. "You're grounded for a month!"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Severus spent the next two weeks confined to his bedroom. He could often hear Eileen and Evangeline laughing out in the garden having a picnic under the tree, downstairs in the living room or baking biscuits and cakes that never found their way up to him. He passed the time reading his Daily Prophet or reading up on rare potions ingredients. He finally wrote a short note to Lucius asking him about how he was and explaining why he wasn't allowed out for the next month.
Dear Lucius, he began.
Mum wasn't too pleased about the whole Romero fiasco. Got spanked with a spoon for using a Silencing charm on a child and grounded for a month. Honestly. I did the little witch a favour!
Anyhoo, can't wallow in self pity for too long! How are you? Write back soon - I'm bored to tears. I never thought my own company would be so dull!
Love,
Sev.
PS. I heard Narcissa and Bellatrix are fighting over who gets to lead you under the mistletoe. Lucky bastard!
PPS. A word of advice: If you value life, go for Bellatrix. She'll probably hex your balls off if you don't.
No sooner had Owl the owl swooped out of his open window than he heard the creak of footsteps on the stairs. He threw himself down on to his large double bed, folded his arms across his chest and glared at the door. Evangeline poked her head into the room.
"Auntie Eileen's going to Diagon Alley. She says I'm to stay up here with you while she's gone."
She hovered in the doorway, unsure what to do next. He decided to take a kinder approach and softened his expression as best he could. Without warning, she ran across the room and leapt straight into his arms, sobbing violently and shaking all over.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
An hour later, Evangeline and Severus were sharing biscuits and Evangeline was detailing everything she could remember about her parents. Severus remained silent and brooding throughout her recolletions, guilt knawing away at his stomach. Her face was tear-stained and puffy, but she was smiling and laughing as she talked about Mr. and Mrs. Romero. The biscuits were still warm from the oven, the heat leaving them slower than usual because of an insulation charm Eileen had put on them. They tasted exquisite.
Eventually, the little girl stretched, yawned, and started settling back into the pillows behind her.
"Oh no you don't!" said Severus. She looked at him blearily and shut her eyes, instantly falling asleep. For all the good it did, Severus scowled at her and folded his arms. Finally, he poked her. Nothing. The child was dead to the world. He sighed and took the biscuit tray off the covers and carried it quietly downstairs. Eileen had been gone for an hour and a half, by his reckoning, and would be back any time soon. He quickly slipped back upstairs and back into his bedroom. Evangeline had snuggled further under the covers than when he left her, and she looked content and peaceful.
He filled a small basin with warm water and took a cloth from the airing cupboard. He gently bathed the tears away from her sleeping face and dried it with a soft, fluffy green towel. He sighed again. The door shut of its own accord, meaning the wards Eileen had put in place to keep him grounded were whirring in to action. They probably sensed he'd left the room twice already. As suddenly as it had struck Evangeline, he felt exhausted and weary.
Severus shrugged of his black shirt, lay down gently on the bed next to Evangeline and waited for sleep to come. It was still light outside, but he felt sure a small nap wouldn't hurt. He watched the little girl asleep next to him until he finally drifted off into his own dreamland.
When he finally awoke, the sky was black and the stars were out. The house was quiet, and Evangeline was still asleep beside him. He glanced at the enchanted clock on his bedroom wall which told him it was 9pm. He felt confused for a moment, wondering why Eileen hadn't woken them for dinner.
Maybe we just looked too peaceful, he thought. She didn't want to disturb us ...
He pulled his crisp shirt back on to his shoulders and fastened a few buttons before trying his door. It opened easily. The wards had been taken off. He instantly knew something was wrong. He bolted down the stairs and in to the living room. It was empty. As was the kitchen, the dining room, the utility room and the draughty room their neighbouring muggles called "the garage". He checked his mother's sitting room. He ran up the stairs and checked the bathroom, the toilet room, her bedroom, the guest bedroom, even his own bedroom again just to make sure.
Eileen hadn't got back from Diagon Alley yet. His stomach plummeted.
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