question- got scared.....may trigger? (has been edited and I added more info in a comment)

[jadenfox]

(edited 2 times, 930 eastern is the most recent comment by me.)

sorry guys, I cant this post to edit, so here is another trigger warning or 2:  weird episode of violence toward a pet, anger, feelings, non detailed mention of past fears and experiances.

Comments

[fruitsofviolet]

That must have been extremely frightening - I'm sorry. I might have put it down to your past making things seem scarier than they really are if he had punched a wall or something, but to actually kick your dog sends up a huge red flag to me. I don't know him and I wasn't there, so I can't say whether or not you should forgive him this time, but I *definitely* think you should stick to what you said - this is the first and last time something like this can ever happen.

[blueserenity22]

If he's never done anything like that before, I'd be pressing him for more than just an apology. I'd want to know what was different about this time that made him react like that; With "I don't know" not being an acceptable answer. Really the best way to ensure that it doesn't happen again, is to find out why it happened this time.

Either way, I think it's good that you set the boundary.

[i_love_freddie]

Do you think you could please put something about being violent towards animals in your cut? It's something that really, really affects me emotionally, and I guess maybe it could affect others as well.

Personally I can say that if anyone ever laid a finger on my dog, they would be immediately out of the door and I would never speak to them again. That is something that I would never be able to forgive. Being angry is one thing, directing that anger towards a living thing is something else entirely.

Having said that, it's no one's place to tell you if you made the right decision or not. I agree with the others, if you choose to stay with him, just be firm and make it clear that this is the one and only time.

[lil_goldielocks]

Personally I can say that if anyone ever laid a finger on my dog, they would be immediately out of the door and I would never speak to them again. That is something that I would never be able to forgive. Being angry is one thing, directing that anger towards a living thing is something else entirely.

Completely agree. I have kitties, but yes, laying a cruel finger on any fur baby is wrong, and will not be tolerated.

[laren]

No sane, rational person will EVER kick a dog, especially 5-10 minutes after the dog accidentally injured them. It doesn't matter if he has never done anything like this before, there have been numerous studies showing that there is a correlation between abusing animals and abusing humans. Many people who abuse, torture, and kill human beings started out abusing, torturing, and killing animals. Even if he doesn't habitually harm animals, it's obvious that he has serious issues with pent up anger that he deals with by retaliating with violence.

In my opinion, you should have dumped him on the spot, and you SHOULD dump him now. He is not a safe person to be with.

[laren]

BTW, violence towards animals/animal abuse is a trigger- not one of mine in the sense that it gives me panic attacks, but in the sense that it pisses me off. In any case, I think it's relevant to put that in the cut.

Mod note:

[sistahraven]

The request is seconded - please add "violence to animals" as a trigger warning as soon as possible.

Re: Mod note:

[sistahraven]

Thanks for changing it!