(no subject)
Chapter 3
The box that was full of glossy paper was now full of pictures. Not just pictures that people had taken, but memory clips. Like sunsets and tress. One particular picture that caught my attention was the moon.
Once again, I was swept away. I was sitting on a swing at a school playground looking at the moon. I looked down at my lap where a piece of paper was folded and stuck inbetween my legs. I picked it up, unfolded it and read it.
To love is to suffer, and to suffer is to love you.
Now I remembered. I looked up and saw Bam sitting a few swings down from me. It was after our thired break-up. That was the note he’s given me.
“What’d we have?” I heard Bam say. All these memories were like a puzzle. It was very confusing. I felt like I was running in circles. What were all these memories supposed to lead me to?
“Love,” I replied. That’s what I thought we had anyways. After our final break-up, I knew I didn’t love him.
I felt empty back in the white room. What was that place anyways? I picked at the walls. A single letter appeared. A. Fuck picking, I scratched and tore at the wall until it spelled something out.
Waiting for you, waiting for you all my life.
I turned to the box, but the box was gone. Now a single picture remained. The picture was of Bam’s eyes. I loved those eyes. So beautiful and deep. I remembered always getting lost in them.
Prepared to be swept away, I closed my eyes. When I opened them, Bam was in front of me.
“How do I get out of here?” Bam asked. He looked like he wanted to cry, but he didn’t.
“Out of where?” this imposter Bam was confusing me a fair bit.
“This love. So called love anyway. Why are you doing this?” Bam screamed, but his scream was choked out by tears.
Of course, this was our final break-up.
“I don’t love you anymore!” it was a sincere statement on my part, I think.
“You used to love me. We used to be in love. What happened to us? Was it something I did?” Bam asked. I tried to think of the reason why I’d broken up with him. I said I didn’t love him, but did I really mean it?
Chapter 4
Damn the white room! Damn it to hell. What the fuck was I going to do now? There weren’t anymore pictures or anything left. Just the writing on the wall.
The writing on the wall? Why did that ring a bell? Who said it? Me? Bam? WHO?!
“You’re just too blind to see the writing on the wall! He loves you Ville! I guess you could say he’s been waiting for you all his life,” it was Ryan who said it. Right after mine and Bam’s final break up, that’s what he said to me.
Now I had a better understanding of things. After that incident, I got drunk. Being drunk and depressed is a bad thing. I overdosed and tried to kill myself. I wasn’t dead, I was only in a coma. I knew that for sure.
I sat down up against the wall that had the writing on it. I could faintly hear a heart monitor, and then someone speaking.
“Ville, I don’t understand why you’d try to kill yourself like that. I hope you can hear me. I love you Ville. I always have, and I always will. Why’d you break up with me? I thought we’d always be together no matter what, I though you loved me. But I guess you don’t,” it was Bam. I started to cry. I wanted out of that god forsaken coma.
“I do love you Bam! I was too blind to see that you love me and that I love you! I love you and I want to be with you forever! I want to hold you in my arms and never let you go!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. I wished Bam could hear me, but I knew he couldn’t.
<3, comment
oh, and just a heads up, this isnt the end of this fic, but i after this one is over, it'll probably be my last one for a little bit b/c me and my friend just started a marilyn manson/trent reznor community, so we're trying to get people to join and such and i'm really busy. so yah. if you wanna join our community it's in my profile, you'll see at the bottom in the communities i'm in. b/c its the only other one besides this one. =)
The box that was full of glossy paper was now full of pictures. Not just pictures that people had taken, but memory clips. Like sunsets and tress. One particular picture that caught my attention was the moon.
Once again, I was swept away. I was sitting on a swing at a school playground looking at the moon. I looked down at my lap where a piece of paper was folded and stuck inbetween my legs. I picked it up, unfolded it and read it.
To love is to suffer, and to suffer is to love you.
Now I remembered. I looked up and saw Bam sitting a few swings down from me. It was after our thired break-up. That was the note he’s given me.
“What’d we have?” I heard Bam say. All these memories were like a puzzle. It was very confusing. I felt like I was running in circles. What were all these memories supposed to lead me to?
“Love,” I replied. That’s what I thought we had anyways. After our final break-up, I knew I didn’t love him.
I felt empty back in the white room. What was that place anyways? I picked at the walls. A single letter appeared. A. Fuck picking, I scratched and tore at the wall until it spelled something out.
Waiting for you, waiting for you all my life.
I turned to the box, but the box was gone. Now a single picture remained. The picture was of Bam’s eyes. I loved those eyes. So beautiful and deep. I remembered always getting lost in them.
Prepared to be swept away, I closed my eyes. When I opened them, Bam was in front of me.
“How do I get out of here?” Bam asked. He looked like he wanted to cry, but he didn’t.
“Out of where?” this imposter Bam was confusing me a fair bit.
“This love. So called love anyway. Why are you doing this?” Bam screamed, but his scream was choked out by tears.
Of course, this was our final break-up.
“I don’t love you anymore!” it was a sincere statement on my part, I think.
“You used to love me. We used to be in love. What happened to us? Was it something I did?” Bam asked. I tried to think of the reason why I’d broken up with him. I said I didn’t love him, but did I really mean it?
Chapter 4
Damn the white room! Damn it to hell. What the fuck was I going to do now? There weren’t anymore pictures or anything left. Just the writing on the wall.
The writing on the wall? Why did that ring a bell? Who said it? Me? Bam? WHO?!
“You’re just too blind to see the writing on the wall! He loves you Ville! I guess you could say he’s been waiting for you all his life,” it was Ryan who said it. Right after mine and Bam’s final break up, that’s what he said to me.
Now I had a better understanding of things. After that incident, I got drunk. Being drunk and depressed is a bad thing. I overdosed and tried to kill myself. I wasn’t dead, I was only in a coma. I knew that for sure.
I sat down up against the wall that had the writing on it. I could faintly hear a heart monitor, and then someone speaking.
“Ville, I don’t understand why you’d try to kill yourself like that. I hope you can hear me. I love you Ville. I always have, and I always will. Why’d you break up with me? I thought we’d always be together no matter what, I though you loved me. But I guess you don’t,” it was Bam. I started to cry. I wanted out of that god forsaken coma.
“I do love you Bam! I was too blind to see that you love me and that I love you! I love you and I want to be with you forever! I want to hold you in my arms and never let you go!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. I wished Bam could hear me, but I knew he couldn’t.
<3, comment
oh, and just a heads up, this isnt the end of this fic, but i after this one is over, it'll probably be my last one for a little bit b/c me and my friend just started a marilyn manson/trent reznor community, so we're trying to get people to join and such and i'm really busy. so yah. if you wanna join our community it's in my profile, you'll see at the bottom in the communities i'm in. b/c its the only other one besides this one. =)