rock_chicka
in
__vam
Wherever I May Roam
For Loz, my potato and sweet_666_777 for continuing to read it and leaving lovely comments... and for everyone else who reads this because without you it wouldn't be being posted!!! *sends you all my love*
Title: Wherever I May Roam
Chapter: 8
Rating: M15+
Disclaimer: Don't know, Don't own, Never Happened
Notes: Because i simply suck at providing links to old chapters, check out vam_dependent for all past chapters, i promise you, they are just sitting there waiting to be read... u don't have to search or anything!!! :D
COMMENTS are LoVe!!!
He thought it was what I wanted, so did I. I couldn’t blame him, but somehow, I did…
~*~
I awoke with a start. My back hurt like nothing else, and my wrists were in pain as well. Beside me lay a figure, but in the darkness I couldn’t see who it was. For the life of me I couldn’t remember what I had done to get where I was. A stabbing pain in my lower back when I moved ever so slightly made me remember. I remembered Ville being on top of me. I remembered the love he had made me feel and I remembered how he had been in me. He forced his way inside my body and into my heart.
But for one second, I remembered how he hadn’t listened to me. He never asked if it was what I wanted, and he had only thought about himself.
Standing, I left Ville alone to dream about me. Gathering my things I did what I knew I should. I ran.
--
Waking up to an empty room when I had been expecting a pair of crystal blue eyes was a shock. I got up as fast as I could, hollering his name. He was simply in the bathroom, I thought to myself as I wandered the halls, searching for him. He had first run to me, he must have wanted me, It wasn’t like he had now run because of what I had done was it?? Room after room I searched, but to no avail. I knew it then, he had run. He had run because of me, because of what I had done. I sunk to the floor, the tears starting to crawl down my face. I had fucked up our friendship in a vain attempt to fulfil my own desperate desires and because of it he had run off. I doubted he would ever be able to trust me again. At least I knew where he would have run too. Ape was always good for Bam in times like these, when I couldn’t help. It made me feel slightly better that he was with people who truly loved him, people who would protect him from Courtney and anyone else who might hurt him. With a scream, I realised how I had hurt him. They would be protecting him from me and I would suddenly become the bad guy I knew I was.
I glanced around, my eyes catching sight of a dark pile in the corner. Rushing over, I picked up Bam’s scarf. It smelt of Bam and it filled me with a warmth just to have it in my hands, to run it through my fingers. I wrapped it around my neck and waited.
--
I stumbled out of Ville’s door and looked around. My car looked the way to go, and running towards it, I scrambled around for my keys.
“SHIT!” The keys were inside. I couldn’t risk going back inside to get them and meeting Ville. Trying to explain to him what I was doing with all my things was a daunting thought. My eyes caught sight of the bushland behind Ville’s house. I was sure I could hide in there until he went out, then run inside, grab the keys and drive off. As quickly as I could, I sprinted towards Ville’s back fence, and in one movement, I jumped over and continued running into the bush. 50 metres in, I found a large rock pile. There was a small cave at the bottom where I hid my stuff. Jumping on top of the flat rock at the top of the pile, I curled up into a little ball and thought about everything.
~*~
I did the only thing I could do in a situation like this… I blamed myself