(no subject)
Title: Carousel
Author: lostxgeneration
Pairing: Vam
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Okay... this ended up a little bit longer than I thought it would. So... let's forget the whole "two part" thing and just see where this takes us. -lol- So sorry I didn't get to reply to all of your comments... I got suspended from school and from there... basically suspended from life.
Oh, by the way this is the new journal of lostxgeneration... feel free to add me for I have no friends and I haven't had time to update my old friends list so... it'd just be easier if I had people add me instead of going through the whole list on my other one... :\
Anywho... on with the show!
(One)
I, never know...
just why you run so far away
C A R O U S E L
Part Two - Ville
In all honesty, he’d always found the whole act rather degrading. Not so much the whole finger down the throat thing, no it was more about having to kneel. He felt it reduced him. It made him feel dirty, cheap… like a whore, and he just had too much pride for that.
That was probably why he hesitated, why he always hesitated. He couldn’t just lock himself in the bathroom and be done with it. He would stalk around and pace for a while. It was a struggle every time. Always weighing the pros and cons… it was always a battle… always a fight that his pride always lost as his meal was washed away and his body cleansed with the raw bite of hunger…
He awoke the next morning slowly. He felt sleep slip from him but kept his eyes closed in the half-dream bliss where no problems seemed to exist. But emerald eyes started to blink open as his stomach growled its empty complaints. Calloused fingertips moved immediately to his temple as the shooting pains started. He let a groan pass his lips as he embraced the consequences of drinking to forget.
The singer rolled to his side and pulled his long legs up to his chest, feeling impossibly small. Flickering jades tried again to open, cautiously testing the amount of sunlight threatening him. Confusion drew his brows together as he was met with nothing but black. He distinctly remembered the thick shades being slightly open, the moon’s silver sheen painting his room in stolen light. But understanding wiped away the worry lines as his bright eyes caught sight of the nightstand, glass of water and aspiring standing proudly next to an envelope addressed to Ville in Bam’s familiar chicken scratch notation.
He shrugged away the extra blanket that had been tucked carefully around his shoulders, grabbing the aspiring and water with one hand and the note in the other. He sat up slowly and downed the pills before unfolding the piece of parchment.
Willa-
Meet me at Rudy’s, 12.30
We’re going to talk, no exceptions.
He cringed visibly, dropping the note in choice of rubbing his fingers over his eyes. Nerves replaced the empty sting as butterflies started to beat rapidly against his rib cage. What did Bam know? What was he gonna say? How was he going to admit it to his friend when he couldn’t even except it himself? He swallowed shallowly as he tried to think, wondering vaguely just when his throat had turned to sandpaper.
This was a dream, just a bad fucking dream. He looked down at the folded paper next to him. No, this wasn’t a dream… it was a mother-fucking nightmare.
He stood suddenly, ignoring the pain that shot through him and threatened to spilt his head in two as he took long strides to his jacket that was slung across a chair. Painted black nails pawed through the pockets and Ville couldn’t help the tingle of excitement and relief as they brushed against cool metal and a pack of Marlboro Reds.
He pulled the pack and lighter from their silky pocket and dragged the chair over to the window. A small scratch of guilt brushed him as he opened the glass, he knew April hated it when he smoked in the house but he couldn’t help it. He needed the nicotine now without question or awkward small talk as she tried to shovel as much food as he’d let her onto his plate.
Sorry, April, it couldn’t be helped… blame you son for this one…
He perched the thin white stick between heart-shaped lips and flicked his lighter into life. He brought the small burst of heat to the tip and sucked down a healthy drag of the wispy gray.
As he inhaled he felt the rush of calm tingle down his spine, delaying oxygen and smothering those stupid little butterflies. His gaze turned to watch the smoke as it was pulled out of his lungs and pushed to dance outside the window. His room faced the relatively quiet part of the ‘Margera Estate’.
His window looked down on April’s rose garden and, a little farther off, the woodlands that lined the property. It was the only place that was never shown on the show, never a victim to the public eye. The singer was glad for this because there seemed to be a certain kind of peace existing in this one view, a certain innocence, that didn’t exist in any other part of the house. It was away from Glomb’s trucks and Raab’s chainsaws and Bam’s cameras. Bam’s… the butterflies were back.
He took another long drag, leaning back in his chair as he tried to steady his heart. He sighed remorsefully as he flicked the growing ash. He found it rather pathetic that such a small thing as a name could send his heart and nerves into such a flurry.
He knew it wasn’t all because of their meeting at half past noon, he’d be lying to himself if he said it was. There was something about the skater that made Ville feel like a lovesick teenager. It was in the way his chocolate curls framed those brilliant glacier eyes that were always lit up with a smile. It was in the way that no matter how serious he tried to get, there was always a grin hiding and tugging at the corners of his mouth as if he was just waiting to be told something ridiculously funny. As if his life depended on getting one more laugh in before the end.
Ville took a thoughtful drag, silently noting that the image he’d built up of Bam was far from what the skater had turned into lately. He knew it was the god honest truth that he hadn’t been the seen those crystal sapphires sparkle in quite some time. Bam seemed tired, worn down. He seemed like he just couldn’t keep up anymore. He wasn’t the fun-loving kid that had served as his drinking buddy for years. He’d lost all of his spirit and it seemed like he never smiled, let alone laughed. And even when he did it almost looked as if it caused him physical pain. Pain that transferred to Ville as he watched his friend slowly lose himself.
He knew it was the drugs and so he pushed all the blame to that fact. Bam was an addict that was losing control of his dirty little secrets. Although they weren’t quite so secret anymore. Ville saw it on everyone’s face. The quiet disappointment and hurt of the American’s friends and family.
Bam was never home anymore, always roaming the town, always looking for that next hit, that next thrill. Ville knew that he’d lost the adrenaline from skating. It showed in the skater’s placing when he did bother to even compete. Sure, he still had his style and he still had his moves but… somewhere along the way he’d lost his passion. His movements on the board were mechanical and rigid, a distant look in his eyes as if he’d rather be anywhere than at the park.
And it was this very fact that scared Ville more than anything else. For Bam to lose his dedication to the one thing he’d built his life around, it was just plain heartbreaking. And it also pricked a certain fear in Ville’s heart that the same thing could happen to him. That maybe, just maybe, he could lose his love for writing the songs that kept a part of his soul and singing them to the masses. It was something he didn’t want to think about.
He took a lengthy drag and held it in as long as he could, letting the smoke float in his lungs as his eyes fell shut. He exhaled slowly, smiling a little as a warm spring breeze blew away the last chills of winter. The singer leaned forward, putting one arm across the windowsill and resting his chin on it. He took one last drag and stubbed out the cherry. He fingered the pack but decided not to light up. He was already running late.
The coffee shop buzzed with the usual noontime rush as people crowded in for lunch. Ville stepped in through the doors, hunching his shoulders and trying to keep his head down, doing everything short of wearing a mask not to draw attention to himself. It was no use though, immediately all eyes were focused on his gothic apparel. He could feel the stares and it just made him pull more into his shell, shrinking back into his already dwarfing jacket.
He sat down in the back, slouching in his chair and crossing his arms across his chest. His eyes stayed cast down to the table, occasionally darting up to look at the door when the bell at the top rang, ready to already him of the skater’s threatening arrival.
He’d made up his mind earlier that morning that was going to play dumb. As soon as Bam sat down there’d be a fake smile pulled tightly over heart-shaped lips and a farce confidence holding his head up high. The skater might see right through it but he would give all he had to act the rock star he was made out to be. But, until then he was content to bounce his knee in nerves and let the butterflies churn his stomach.
Ville’s breathing was harsh and uneven. His palms were starting to sweat. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out his pocket watch, fingers slipping a little on the smooth silver clasp. He clicked it open. 12.26 Fuck… His leg bounced with more vigor. He flagged down a waitress.
“Excuse me, miss?” She came over tiredly, looking at the scared man with a little more than slight annoyance.
“Yes?” Ville licked his lips.
“I was wondering if it was possible to have a smoke in here?” She shook her head.
“No, I’m sorry we can’t allow that.” Emerald eyes flickered slightly.
“Please, I have a friend coming and I’m afraid it’ll be rather stressful.” She rolled her eyes not so discreetly and started tapping her fake Prada heels.
“Look, I’m sorry but there’s really nothing I can do.”
“Oh c’mon Ashley, let the man have his cigarette.” A smile curled around Ville’s lips. At least Bam was on his side. Wait… Bam? Shit. The butterflies were back, and apparently on steroids.
“M-Mr. Margera.” He gave her a sparkling plastic smile. It was almost sincere.
“Please, just Bam. Now is there any way that you could just bend the rules, just this once?” She pulled a glossed lip between bleached teeth.
“I could lose my job.” She said. He nodded sympathetically.
“Asshole boss, huh? Well, if that happens then you come see me and I’ll hook you up with something.” Her Barbie smile was back in place as he gave her another dazzling grin.
“Oh, well… I guess there’s no real harm in it… I mean.” Ville felt a twist of something like jealousy pull at his heart as the skater rested a hand on the blonde’s arm.
“Thank you so much, now could you be a dear and get us two of your House Lattes… the one with the spices and shit? Thanks.” As the girl walked away Bam dropped his photo shoot grin and let out a small chuckle.
“So how was I? Convincing?” Ville rolled his eyes as he watched his friend take the seat across from him.
“I really should’ve believed you when you said you have all of West Chester wrapped around your finger.” The singer shook his head and smirked a little as he spoke. Bam let a small smile tug at his mouth. It was just a twist of the corners but it made Ville’s heart jump a little in his chest.
“Damn right you should have, now have your fuckin’ cancer stick before I change her mind.” Ville smiled and pulled his pack from his jacket pocket. His hands shook a little as he grabbed a cigarette and lit up. He could feel Bam watching his every movement, catching every flicker of motion in those big blue eyes. Ville took a long drag before meeting those glowing cobalts.
“So, Bam. What did you want to talk about?”
“Look, Ville I-“ The skater opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by a burst of bleached blonde tips.
“Here’s your coffee Mr- I mean Bam.” He looked up at her with dull eyes.
“Yeah, thanks…” The skater took the steaming mug from her hand, handing it to Ville before taking his own. He turned back to address Ville but was cut off again.
“I so totally love your show.” She said before splitting into a fit of short giggles. Ville could have sworn that her voice just raised two octaves. He watched Bam smile grudgingly.
“Always great to meet a fan.” Couldn’t she tell he wanted nothing to do with her?
“So, ah, who’s your friend? He’s cute.” Another fit of giggles seemed to over come her as a blush stained her cheeks slightly. The singer could have sworn something possessive flickered in Bam’s eyes.
“He’s a man who needs no introduction.” Ville let a loose chuckle pass his lip. He reached out a hand to shake the girl’s.
“Ville Valo, lead singer of the band HIM.” It was obvious the girl had wanted to converse more, mentally writing down everything to relay to her little poser friends in their little poser pink rooms with butterflies and flowers and… well poser-y things but Bam interrupted.
“Hey, you know I’d love to talk with you more, really I would, but I have something quite important to talk to my friend about… you know, production stuff and the like… editing and all that horse shit so, if you could possibly…?” Fuck off? Ville smirked at the thought and sucked down a quiet drag.
“Oh! Of course, I’ll just let you two talk and… and make sure no one interrupts and…” Bam smiled.
“Thank-you so much.” As she turned away he rolled his eyes.
“Fucking hell.” Ville smiled.
“Y’see what happens when you’re nice to them? They’ll never leave.” Bam shrugged.
“It’s not the fans that bother me… it’s the ones that you can’t have a decent conversation with. The ones who think you stole the heartagram from me.”
“Bloody posers…” Bam’s eyes smiled and held up his coffee cup.
“Cheers to that, my friend.” Ville clinked mugs with him shallowly. My friend… yeah, that hurt.
An awkward silence fell over the pair as each waited for the other to start. Ville inhaled greedily from his cigarette. Bam’s eyes were focused on the rim of his mug as he watched the steam rise. He knew what he wanted to say… just not how to say it. He looked up to find fiery emeralds staring him down. He kept the gaze as long as he could but cast his eyes down in defeat. He ran a tongue lightly over chapped lips.
“Look, Ville…” He sighed. “I’m not as good with words as you are, I’ll never be and I accept that but… it makes it a pain in the ass when you’ve got something to say and you just can’t get the words out.” Ville kept silent and took another drag, looking anywhere but at the man in front of him.
“And, all I can say is that… I know what’s happening, what you’re doing… It, I started noticing things Vil’ and… it was just a matter of time before I put two and two together.” Jade eyes caught fire.
“What do you know?” He hissed. Startled blue shot up to meet his gaze.
“I, I just… are you going to make me say it?” Ville took a frustrated drag from his cigarette before flicking the ash on his bread plate.
“No, I think the question is, my dear Bammi, are you going to make me say it? What do you know about it, what do you know about anything? Nothing, you know nothing.” Bam was quiet as Ville seethed.
“I… it, it’s okay Ville. I, I know what it’s like to feel that way. I understand… I just, I want to help you.” The skater reached for his hand but spidery fingers moved away.
“You think you can help me, you think you can just help everyone. Well, fuck off I don’t need you to be my savior, my knight in fucking shining armor. Do you hear me? I don’t need you!” The singer stood up suddenly and took long strides to the door, seeking a fast escape.
“Ville!” Bam huffed with short patience, slamming down a few green notes on the table and following his friend out into the streets of West Chester. He spied the singer stalking off down the road, looking desperately for a cab to flag down.
“Vil’ will you wait the fuck up?”
“Fuck off Bam. Just fuck off. Go back to your fucking castle and think whatever the fuck you want about me.” Bam was closing in as he took bigger steps to catch up.
“Will you fucking stop already?! We’re going to fucking talk about this-“ He grabbed the thin singer by the shoulders and spun him around. But, suddenly his shouting voice hushed as he caught the tears sparkling in Ville’s eyes. “Oh, Willa…”
He opened his arms slightly but it was all Ville needed. He melted into his skater’s embrace, letting the tears fall freely.
“I’m sorry, so, so sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you and…” Bam held onto the singer just a little bit tighter, worry piercing his heart as he felt just how thin his friend had become.
“Ssh, it’s okay Vil’, it’s okay.” Ville shook his head.
“No, no it’s not. I’m not.” He looked the skater in the eyes.
“Bammi, I think I have a problem.”
---------------
comments?
And, why yes... the text itself is exactly 3,000 words.
How stunning of you to notice!
Author: lostxgeneration
Pairing: Vam
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Okay... this ended up a little bit longer than I thought it would. So... let's forget the whole "two part" thing and just see where this takes us. -lol- So sorry I didn't get to reply to all of your comments... I got suspended from school and from there... basically suspended from life.
Oh, by the way this is the new journal of lostxgeneration... feel free to add me for I have no friends and I haven't had time to update my old friends list so... it'd just be easier if I had people add me instead of going through the whole list on my other one... :\
Anywho... on with the show!
(One)
I, never know...
just why you run so far away
C A R O U S E L
Part Two - Ville
In all honesty, he’d always found the whole act rather degrading. Not so much the whole finger down the throat thing, no it was more about having to kneel. He felt it reduced him. It made him feel dirty, cheap… like a whore, and he just had too much pride for that.
That was probably why he hesitated, why he always hesitated. He couldn’t just lock himself in the bathroom and be done with it. He would stalk around and pace for a while. It was a struggle every time. Always weighing the pros and cons… it was always a battle… always a fight that his pride always lost as his meal was washed away and his body cleansed with the raw bite of hunger…
He awoke the next morning slowly. He felt sleep slip from him but kept his eyes closed in the half-dream bliss where no problems seemed to exist. But emerald eyes started to blink open as his stomach growled its empty complaints. Calloused fingertips moved immediately to his temple as the shooting pains started. He let a groan pass his lips as he embraced the consequences of drinking to forget.
The singer rolled to his side and pulled his long legs up to his chest, feeling impossibly small. Flickering jades tried again to open, cautiously testing the amount of sunlight threatening him. Confusion drew his brows together as he was met with nothing but black. He distinctly remembered the thick shades being slightly open, the moon’s silver sheen painting his room in stolen light. But understanding wiped away the worry lines as his bright eyes caught sight of the nightstand, glass of water and aspiring standing proudly next to an envelope addressed to Ville in Bam’s familiar chicken scratch notation.
He shrugged away the extra blanket that had been tucked carefully around his shoulders, grabbing the aspiring and water with one hand and the note in the other. He sat up slowly and downed the pills before unfolding the piece of parchment.
Willa-
Meet me at Rudy’s, 12.30
We’re going to talk, no exceptions.
He cringed visibly, dropping the note in choice of rubbing his fingers over his eyes. Nerves replaced the empty sting as butterflies started to beat rapidly against his rib cage. What did Bam know? What was he gonna say? How was he going to admit it to his friend when he couldn’t even except it himself? He swallowed shallowly as he tried to think, wondering vaguely just when his throat had turned to sandpaper.
This was a dream, just a bad fucking dream. He looked down at the folded paper next to him. No, this wasn’t a dream… it was a mother-fucking nightmare.
He stood suddenly, ignoring the pain that shot through him and threatened to spilt his head in two as he took long strides to his jacket that was slung across a chair. Painted black nails pawed through the pockets and Ville couldn’t help the tingle of excitement and relief as they brushed against cool metal and a pack of Marlboro Reds.
He pulled the pack and lighter from their silky pocket and dragged the chair over to the window. A small scratch of guilt brushed him as he opened the glass, he knew April hated it when he smoked in the house but he couldn’t help it. He needed the nicotine now without question or awkward small talk as she tried to shovel as much food as he’d let her onto his plate.
Sorry, April, it couldn’t be helped… blame you son for this one…
He perched the thin white stick between heart-shaped lips and flicked his lighter into life. He brought the small burst of heat to the tip and sucked down a healthy drag of the wispy gray.
As he inhaled he felt the rush of calm tingle down his spine, delaying oxygen and smothering those stupid little butterflies. His gaze turned to watch the smoke as it was pulled out of his lungs and pushed to dance outside the window. His room faced the relatively quiet part of the ‘Margera Estate’.
His window looked down on April’s rose garden and, a little farther off, the woodlands that lined the property. It was the only place that was never shown on the show, never a victim to the public eye. The singer was glad for this because there seemed to be a certain kind of peace existing in this one view, a certain innocence, that didn’t exist in any other part of the house. It was away from Glomb’s trucks and Raab’s chainsaws and Bam’s cameras. Bam’s… the butterflies were back.
He took another long drag, leaning back in his chair as he tried to steady his heart. He sighed remorsefully as he flicked the growing ash. He found it rather pathetic that such a small thing as a name could send his heart and nerves into such a flurry.
He knew it wasn’t all because of their meeting at half past noon, he’d be lying to himself if he said it was. There was something about the skater that made Ville feel like a lovesick teenager. It was in the way his chocolate curls framed those brilliant glacier eyes that were always lit up with a smile. It was in the way that no matter how serious he tried to get, there was always a grin hiding and tugging at the corners of his mouth as if he was just waiting to be told something ridiculously funny. As if his life depended on getting one more laugh in before the end.
Ville took a thoughtful drag, silently noting that the image he’d built up of Bam was far from what the skater had turned into lately. He knew it was the god honest truth that he hadn’t been the seen those crystal sapphires sparkle in quite some time. Bam seemed tired, worn down. He seemed like he just couldn’t keep up anymore. He wasn’t the fun-loving kid that had served as his drinking buddy for years. He’d lost all of his spirit and it seemed like he never smiled, let alone laughed. And even when he did it almost looked as if it caused him physical pain. Pain that transferred to Ville as he watched his friend slowly lose himself.
He knew it was the drugs and so he pushed all the blame to that fact. Bam was an addict that was losing control of his dirty little secrets. Although they weren’t quite so secret anymore. Ville saw it on everyone’s face. The quiet disappointment and hurt of the American’s friends and family.
Bam was never home anymore, always roaming the town, always looking for that next hit, that next thrill. Ville knew that he’d lost the adrenaline from skating. It showed in the skater’s placing when he did bother to even compete. Sure, he still had his style and he still had his moves but… somewhere along the way he’d lost his passion. His movements on the board were mechanical and rigid, a distant look in his eyes as if he’d rather be anywhere than at the park.
And it was this very fact that scared Ville more than anything else. For Bam to lose his dedication to the one thing he’d built his life around, it was just plain heartbreaking. And it also pricked a certain fear in Ville’s heart that the same thing could happen to him. That maybe, just maybe, he could lose his love for writing the songs that kept a part of his soul and singing them to the masses. It was something he didn’t want to think about.
He took a lengthy drag and held it in as long as he could, letting the smoke float in his lungs as his eyes fell shut. He exhaled slowly, smiling a little as a warm spring breeze blew away the last chills of winter. The singer leaned forward, putting one arm across the windowsill and resting his chin on it. He took one last drag and stubbed out the cherry. He fingered the pack but decided not to light up. He was already running late.
The coffee shop buzzed with the usual noontime rush as people crowded in for lunch. Ville stepped in through the doors, hunching his shoulders and trying to keep his head down, doing everything short of wearing a mask not to draw attention to himself. It was no use though, immediately all eyes were focused on his gothic apparel. He could feel the stares and it just made him pull more into his shell, shrinking back into his already dwarfing jacket.
He sat down in the back, slouching in his chair and crossing his arms across his chest. His eyes stayed cast down to the table, occasionally darting up to look at the door when the bell at the top rang, ready to already him of the skater’s threatening arrival.
He’d made up his mind earlier that morning that was going to play dumb. As soon as Bam sat down there’d be a fake smile pulled tightly over heart-shaped lips and a farce confidence holding his head up high. The skater might see right through it but he would give all he had to act the rock star he was made out to be. But, until then he was content to bounce his knee in nerves and let the butterflies churn his stomach.
Ville’s breathing was harsh and uneven. His palms were starting to sweat. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out his pocket watch, fingers slipping a little on the smooth silver clasp. He clicked it open. 12.26 Fuck… His leg bounced with more vigor. He flagged down a waitress.
“Excuse me, miss?” She came over tiredly, looking at the scared man with a little more than slight annoyance.
“Yes?” Ville licked his lips.
“I was wondering if it was possible to have a smoke in here?” She shook her head.
“No, I’m sorry we can’t allow that.” Emerald eyes flickered slightly.
“Please, I have a friend coming and I’m afraid it’ll be rather stressful.” She rolled her eyes not so discreetly and started tapping her fake Prada heels.
“Look, I’m sorry but there’s really nothing I can do.”
“Oh c’mon Ashley, let the man have his cigarette.” A smile curled around Ville’s lips. At least Bam was on his side. Wait… Bam? Shit. The butterflies were back, and apparently on steroids.
“M-Mr. Margera.” He gave her a sparkling plastic smile. It was almost sincere.
“Please, just Bam. Now is there any way that you could just bend the rules, just this once?” She pulled a glossed lip between bleached teeth.
“I could lose my job.” She said. He nodded sympathetically.
“Asshole boss, huh? Well, if that happens then you come see me and I’ll hook you up with something.” Her Barbie smile was back in place as he gave her another dazzling grin.
“Oh, well… I guess there’s no real harm in it… I mean.” Ville felt a twist of something like jealousy pull at his heart as the skater rested a hand on the blonde’s arm.
“Thank you so much, now could you be a dear and get us two of your House Lattes… the one with the spices and shit? Thanks.” As the girl walked away Bam dropped his photo shoot grin and let out a small chuckle.
“So how was I? Convincing?” Ville rolled his eyes as he watched his friend take the seat across from him.
“I really should’ve believed you when you said you have all of West Chester wrapped around your finger.” The singer shook his head and smirked a little as he spoke. Bam let a small smile tug at his mouth. It was just a twist of the corners but it made Ville’s heart jump a little in his chest.
“Damn right you should have, now have your fuckin’ cancer stick before I change her mind.” Ville smiled and pulled his pack from his jacket pocket. His hands shook a little as he grabbed a cigarette and lit up. He could feel Bam watching his every movement, catching every flicker of motion in those big blue eyes. Ville took a long drag before meeting those glowing cobalts.
“So, Bam. What did you want to talk about?”
“Look, Ville I-“ The skater opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by a burst of bleached blonde tips.
“Here’s your coffee Mr- I mean Bam.” He looked up at her with dull eyes.
“Yeah, thanks…” The skater took the steaming mug from her hand, handing it to Ville before taking his own. He turned back to address Ville but was cut off again.
“I so totally love your show.” She said before splitting into a fit of short giggles. Ville could have sworn that her voice just raised two octaves. He watched Bam smile grudgingly.
“Always great to meet a fan.” Couldn’t she tell he wanted nothing to do with her?
“So, ah, who’s your friend? He’s cute.” Another fit of giggles seemed to over come her as a blush stained her cheeks slightly. The singer could have sworn something possessive flickered in Bam’s eyes.
“He’s a man who needs no introduction.” Ville let a loose chuckle pass his lip. He reached out a hand to shake the girl’s.
“Ville Valo, lead singer of the band HIM.” It was obvious the girl had wanted to converse more, mentally writing down everything to relay to her little poser friends in their little poser pink rooms with butterflies and flowers and… well poser-y things but Bam interrupted.
“Hey, you know I’d love to talk with you more, really I would, but I have something quite important to talk to my friend about… you know, production stuff and the like… editing and all that horse shit so, if you could possibly…?” Fuck off? Ville smirked at the thought and sucked down a quiet drag.
“Oh! Of course, I’ll just let you two talk and… and make sure no one interrupts and…” Bam smiled.
“Thank-you so much.” As she turned away he rolled his eyes.
“Fucking hell.” Ville smiled.
“Y’see what happens when you’re nice to them? They’ll never leave.” Bam shrugged.
“It’s not the fans that bother me… it’s the ones that you can’t have a decent conversation with. The ones who think you stole the heartagram from me.”
“Bloody posers…” Bam’s eyes smiled and held up his coffee cup.
“Cheers to that, my friend.” Ville clinked mugs with him shallowly. My friend… yeah, that hurt.
An awkward silence fell over the pair as each waited for the other to start. Ville inhaled greedily from his cigarette. Bam’s eyes were focused on the rim of his mug as he watched the steam rise. He knew what he wanted to say… just not how to say it. He looked up to find fiery emeralds staring him down. He kept the gaze as long as he could but cast his eyes down in defeat. He ran a tongue lightly over chapped lips.
“Look, Ville…” He sighed. “I’m not as good with words as you are, I’ll never be and I accept that but… it makes it a pain in the ass when you’ve got something to say and you just can’t get the words out.” Ville kept silent and took another drag, looking anywhere but at the man in front of him.
“And, all I can say is that… I know what’s happening, what you’re doing… It, I started noticing things Vil’ and… it was just a matter of time before I put two and two together.” Jade eyes caught fire.
“What do you know?” He hissed. Startled blue shot up to meet his gaze.
“I, I just… are you going to make me say it?” Ville took a frustrated drag from his cigarette before flicking the ash on his bread plate.
“No, I think the question is, my dear Bammi, are you going to make me say it? What do you know about it, what do you know about anything? Nothing, you know nothing.” Bam was quiet as Ville seethed.
“I… it, it’s okay Ville. I, I know what it’s like to feel that way. I understand… I just, I want to help you.” The skater reached for his hand but spidery fingers moved away.
“You think you can help me, you think you can just help everyone. Well, fuck off I don’t need you to be my savior, my knight in fucking shining armor. Do you hear me? I don’t need you!” The singer stood up suddenly and took long strides to the door, seeking a fast escape.
“Ville!” Bam huffed with short patience, slamming down a few green notes on the table and following his friend out into the streets of West Chester. He spied the singer stalking off down the road, looking desperately for a cab to flag down.
“Vil’ will you wait the fuck up?”
“Fuck off Bam. Just fuck off. Go back to your fucking castle and think whatever the fuck you want about me.” Bam was closing in as he took bigger steps to catch up.
“Will you fucking stop already?! We’re going to fucking talk about this-“ He grabbed the thin singer by the shoulders and spun him around. But, suddenly his shouting voice hushed as he caught the tears sparkling in Ville’s eyes. “Oh, Willa…”
He opened his arms slightly but it was all Ville needed. He melted into his skater’s embrace, letting the tears fall freely.
“I’m sorry, so, so sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you and…” Bam held onto the singer just a little bit tighter, worry piercing his heart as he felt just how thin his friend had become.
“Ssh, it’s okay Vil’, it’s okay.” Ville shook his head.
“No, no it’s not. I’m not.” He looked the skater in the eyes.
“Bammi, I think I have a problem.”
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comments?
And, why yes... the text itself is exactly 3,000 words.
How stunning of you to notice!