take the kids & run
Junsu knows who Park Yoochun is. He knows, but he doesn’t show it.
Instead he just smiles kindly, tries to, and shakes his hand like Yunho had done. Truthfully he is very uncomfortable, trying not to look into the other man’s eyes, afraid that he might remember. I bet he doesn’t, I mean look at him - cell phone ringing every other minute with a different girl on the line. I hate guys like that.
Park Yoochun mentions that Junsu looks familiar.
Junsu feels all colour leave his face.
”No, I don’t think we’ve met,” Junsu says and sees how Jaejoong seems to be thinking of something and Yunho is staring at him and then glances at Junsu, searching for something on his face and finding it. It’s awkward.
Yoochun shrugs his shoulders and smiles.
”Well, in that case, nice to meet you,” the man says and let’s out a chuckle, grinning and turns to Jaejoong, saying that they should be going back. Jaejoong turns to Yunho and pecks his cheek, smiles and waves as a goodbye as they start to walk towards the checkout. Junsu is filled with wonder but Yunho says that they should continue.
Junsu turns to Yunho and he is about to say something when Yunho sighs.
”Please, don’t. It’s complicated,” Junsu doesn’t know why but he somewhat understands the importance of Jaejoong in Yunho’s life, even though the older man has never spoken about his past before.
Junsu throws an arm around Yunho’s shoulders and grins.
”Promise me that you’ll talk about it someday?” and Yunho chuckles, knowing that Junsu only means well, and nods.
”Yeah, I promise.”
Junsu can wait.
It’s a coincidental meeting in the café Junsu works part-time in.
Park Yoochun strolls in, sunglasses shielding his eyes from the scorching sun and Kim Junsu feels like a girl and he can’t help it. He is surprised, though, when Yoochun notices him and walks to the counter.
”Hi,” he smiles and orders a coffee. Junsu is nervous. “Sorry for the last time - at the supermarket. I was kind of rude to you, wasn’t I?”
Junsu is confused. What is he apologizing for?
Yoochun chuckles and turns his head away, embarrassed.
”I was just very afraid of Yunho. He has this serious aura around him, but the way Jaejoong speaks about him is just so difficult to believe,” Yoochun glances up at Junsu, “and actually, I do remember you.” Junsu blanches.
”No, no you don’t,” he says and Yoochun chuckles about to say something, but Junsu interrupts him.
”A dolphin!” he shouts before the other one can say anything, unaware of the stares of the clients, and Yoochun is flabbergasted, but tries to say something again.
”A duck!” Junsu says and Yoochun gets impatient.
”What’s your problem, animal-boy?!” the supposedly older one grumbles out and Junsu feels only anger now - he’s nervous no more.
”You! You coming here - coming to my working place and being all, oh I’m so nice and kind and by the way I actually do remember you,” Junsu says, heatedly, and scrubs the counter with the wipe, muttering curse words even if he doesn’t like to curse.
Yoochun scoffs.
”Oh so you’re the innocent one here? I was drunk, you were drunk and you weren’t certainly resisting if I remember correctly!” Junsu blushes and points at Yoochun but grimaces, puts his hand on the counter and inhales, deep, and exhales. Anger management, Junsu, anger management.
Yoochun smirks like he had won.
”So, you in for another round?”
Junsu sees red and throws the wipe into Yoochun’s face.
Later that day he gets fired for assaulting a client and Yoochun laughs. Junsu hits his arm (wonders why Yoochun still was there) and sighs. I’m so screwed.
”No, seriously, wanna go drinking? Jaejoong is spending the night at Yunho’s so I have no one whom to resort to,” and Junsu thinks that it’s a very, very bad idea but he says yes. He needs a drink. Even if the company is from the worst end.
”You’re ready to go drinking with a gay guy?” and Yoochun laughs, saying I do this every week with Jaejoong. Why wouldn’t I be ready?
Junsu sighs and wonders why he agreed.
Kim Junsu finds a new part-time job after a couple weeks of searching. He feels bitter, blaming Yoochun for losing the previous job, but he knows he was the one who threw the wipe. Not Yoochun. He was just provoking him.
It’s just that Junsu likes to blame Yoochun.
He got his new job at the local laundry near his apartment. It’s a cosy little place that has six workers including Junsu himself. He gets easily accustomed to the ways of the place and finds himself enjoying washing laundry more than serving the customers at the café.
’Junsu, you should get a job even remotely related to dentistry - like a candy shop,’ Changmin had said when Junsu had been at his house, reading the newspaper and trying to find a job. He had scoffed at his ex-boyfriend’s idea and continued browsing the paper.
’I think I should get a job that’s not even remotely related to dentistry, because I get enough of it as it is,’ Junsu had mumbled and Changmin had barked out a laugh.
It had been with Changmin’s help that Junsu had got a job at the laundry. The owner, a man in his 40s, was an acquaintance of Changmin’s and was actually looking for a new employee. After Changmin had informed about this to Junsu, he had screamed in joy and pecked Changmin’s cheek. With Junsu being his only boy- or girlfriend ever it felt comforting - in a friendly way.
Yunho had been the same as always after getting to know that Junsu got a new job.
’That’s good, Junsu, I’m glad,’ even if it seemed like he wasn’t, Yunho always had something else in his mind but Junsu had accepted it, ‘hopefully Yoochun won’t be coming to your new job then. You two don’t seem to mix.’
Junsu feels a bit rude but he wants Yunho to be more open. He knows that seventy percent of what Yunho thinks is somehow related to Kim Jaejoong, the mysterious guy Junsu had once met in the supermarket along with Park Yoochun.
But Junsu doesn’t know anything about their relationship. It makes him feel insecure, but he respects Yunho’s decision to be quiet about it.
I’ll wait for the time when Yunho’s ready even if it takes years, Junsu thinks, I’m used to waiting.
It’s the only thing I can do for him.
Kim Junsu has a knack for meeting Park Yoochun coincidentally.
They’re at Jaejoong’s apartment (Jaejoong had invited Junsu along with Yunho) and while Yunho and Jaejoong are being very comfortable with each other, Yoochun and Junsu are not. They’re playing a soccer game on Jaejoong’s PlayStation 2 and Junsu realizes that both of them are very competitive.
While Junsu and Yoochun play the game, Junsu hears how Jaejoong wants to take pictures with Yunho. He also hears Yunho mutter, have you taken up this bad habit again, Jaejoong? to which Jaejoong laughs and says, no, no. I learned from my mistake and there’s no way I’d start that again. I just want memories. Junsu sees Yunho smile and starts when Yoochun cheers - loudly.
He takes a look at the screen. Yoochun’s team is leading 3-2.
Yoochun smirks.
”Where’s your attention, dolphin-boy?” and Junsu hits his arm, hard, and Yoochun let’s out an ‘ow’.
”I’m the champion at this game, you know! There’s no way I’ll lose to a dandy boy,” Junsu sticks his tongue out at Yoochun, but screeches when the older man tickles him. Junsu squirms and tries to get away from him, eu kyang kyanging all the while. Yoochun keeps his hands tightly on Junsu’s sides and holds the younger one against the floor, game controllers forgotten next to them.
”The sound of you laughing is terrible,” Yoochun mutters and looks into Junsu’s eyes. Junsu scoffs and is about to respond, but Yunho interrupts him.
”I like Junsu’s laugh,” and this rewards Yunho with Junsu shouting out a thank you. Jaejoong looks at Yunho in wonder, a coffee cup in his hand.
”You do?” he asks and smiles behind the coffee cup. He dwells on Yunho’s development, once again, and can’t help but feel positive about the future. Yunho himself might not see it, but he is special: he is not like Junsu or Yoochun or even like Jaejoong himself. He is unique, but he has to learn how to love himself, how to shout out his own opinions now that he is no longer under the direct influence of his father.
Yunho grins at him and Jaejoong flushes.
”Yeah. I do.”
Yoochun groans.
”How can someone like that cackling of his,” he mumbles, waiting for a response but not getting any. Yoochun notices that Junsu, actually, isn’t anywhere to be seen anymore (wasn’t he just now on the floor?) and Yunho seems to notice Yoochun’s confused face.
”He’s on the telephone,” the older man says and Yoochun turns around to see Junsu sitting on a chair in the kitchen, talking to his cell phone with a large grin plastered on his face.
”Who’s he talking to?” is what Yoochun wants to ask but doesn’t. It’s Junsu’s own business and not related to Yoochun in anyway, so he keeps quiet and doesn’t stick his nose there where it doesn’t belong.
Yunho seems to be a mind reader.
”Regarding the look on his face, I’d say he’s talking to either Lee Hyukjae or Shim Changmin,” Yunho says and takes a sip of his coffee that Jaejoong had brewed for him. Yoochun doesn’t want to believe that the two of them are only friends - and he knows that there’s something more, but it takes time to grow.
Yunho takes time to grow.
”Who?” Yoochun asks, the two names Yunho mentioned earlier saying nothing to him. He is a curious kid, his parents had always said, too curious. It’ll get you into trouble someday, Yoochun. He didn’t heed their warning and his curiousness had, in fact, got him into trouble. Many times.
”Oh, Hyukjae and Changmin are best friends with Junsu, I think,” Yunho glances at Yoochun and sees the younger one nod a couple times understandingly, but then he frowns.
”I thought you were his best friend?” to this Yunho just shakes his head. He isn’t. At least he doesn’t think of himself as anyone’s best friend - Yunho is not the kind of person, he himself thinks, who could be trusted in every situation, be depended on. Or maybe he will be, but not yet.
Jaejoong watches him.
Junsu ends the call and walks back to the TV and sits next to Yoochun, all sunshine and daisies, surprising Yoochun. It’s somewhat a comforting sight.
But Park Yoochun is a curious kid.
”So, with whom did you have sex over the telephone?”
Park Yoochun finds a pillow against his face and waves his arms around trying to find the hands pushing the pillow, and he succeeds. Yoochun grips the culprit’s (Junsu’s) arms and pushes them away from the pillow, making the culprit (Junsu) fall on him - face against the pillow. Yoochun pushes the culprit (Junsu) off him onto the floor and sits on top of him, watching the younger one inhale and exhale. He grins.
”What are you looking at?!” Junsu grumbles out, trying to get away from Yoochun’s death grip. It’s not that comfortable being under (the second time in ten minutes, Junsu thinks bitterly) a man with whom you once had terrible, nameless sex in a bar’s restroom. Junsu also knows that he wouldn’t mind more of this, but reminds himself that the only good thing about Yoochun is his appearance. He is rotten inside.
Jaejoong laughs on the side while Yunho just shakes his head, silently worrying about what Junsu might be thinking, feeling, seeing. He realized it the day Junsu and Yoochun met in the supermarket, he saw it on Junsu’s face and in Junsu’s eyes. Yunho is perceptive. It’s a feature he needs in his upcoming business career.
Yoochun stands up, grinning like no other and offers a hand to Junsu who just waves his help away and stands up on his own. He dusted his shirt and glared at Yoochun.
”You…,” Junsu begins but sighs and shakes his head. Yoochun tilts his head in confusion.
”I’ll be going now. Changmin’s coming over to my place so… yep,” Junsu finishes lamely and Yunho just nods and says that you should hurry then, Changmin’s house is much nearer than Jaejoong’s is to your house to which Junsu responds well he has the key so he won’t have to wait for me to open the door. Yunho nods, again and waves as a bye while Jaejoong goes to hug Junsu (Junsu is bewildered).
”Promise me you’ll come again sometime, okay?” the oldest says and Junsu glances at Yoochun before answering,
”Yeah. I’ll visit again.”
It’s that same autumn when Kim Junsu realizes his (stupid) feelings for a (stupid) man who doesn’t know the meaning of ‘settling down’.
It’s not like he didn’t realize his attraction to Yoochun before, but it’s now when he comprehends the fact that through teasing and drinking and just being there Yoochun has become an important part of his life, crawled his way in. Junsu knows that he was in denial for a couple of months but he likes to think of those couple of months as the ‘happy time’.
It was certainly better than this, watching Yoochun drunk in club, checking out and flirting with everything that moves (no, seriously, he had talked to the TV screen) and dancing like there was no tomorrow.
”Junsu,” Yoochun giggles with his arm around a petite woman’s shoulders, “why aren’t you dancing?”
”I don’t feel like dancing,” Junsu says and continues the act of being indifferent. At least tries to. He has nothing to do (drinking is a no-no, he doesn’t want another Yoochun to happen) and he wonders why he agreed to this.
Again. Like always.
I just can’t say no to him, now can I? is what Junsu would think every time he spent his Friday evening at the same bar, watching the same events unfold. Except Yoochun would always have a different girl but that was nothing special - it didn’t make the evening any different.
Yoochun stares at him before whispering something into the woman’s ear (she giggles and pecks his cheek) and the woman leaves. Junsu looks first at the woman’s retreating back, then at Yoochun. Yoochun, who was sleazily smiling. Yoochun, who was sleazily smiling and staring at him. Junsu feels uncomfortable.
”What is it?” he asks and starts when he feels the older man grip his hand.
”Let’s get out of here,” Yoochun says, eyes glinting with something that made him look sober - determination and childishness. Like Changmin, isn’t he?
Junsu had no time to respond before Yoochun started dragging him out of the club into the world outside. It wasn’t yet 11 PM, but almost, and Yoochun was running towards something, still tightly gripping Junsu, making the younger one run along with him.
The people they passed by were giving them incredulous stares but Junsu paid them no mind. He felt free, more than ever, with Yoochun leading him somewhere Junsu didn’t know and didn’t care to know. They laughed as they ran, Yoochun sneakily taking a glance of the grinning and running Junsu, going against the wind.
Yoochun stopped when they came across a small park and started to cough. Junsu quickly took his wrist from Yoochun’s grip but the older man took it into his grip again and waved his other hand as a sign that it was okay. Junsu wasn’t convinced.
”You have asthma or something?” Junsu asks and circles his hands around Yoochun’s waist, making the other sit along with him. The older one nods, inhaling deep. Oh. Oh.
Junsu hits his arm.
”Why the hell would you then start running?! Idiot, aren’t you,” he mumbles and stuffs his hands into his pockets, “you should stop smoking too.” Yoochun laughs, sounding strained.
”Why should I? I run when I want to, I smoke when I want to,” he says and sticks his tongue out. Junsu hits the older man’s arm, again, and lets out an aish, you’re really getting on my nerves.
Yoochun smiles.
He lies down on the grass and pushes Junsu down with him, making the younger one screech in surprise. It would be easy to forget the fact that they are in the middle of a metropolis if it weren’t for the smoke and clouds shielding the stars from their vision.
The heat Yoochun radiates is enough to keep Junsu warm. He wonders about the future - what it would be like if they were together: it’s a pleasant thought only when he forgets certain characteristics of Yoochun. He feels giddy thinking about it, but feels even more down when a voice in the back of his head reminds him about the real Yoochun. Don’t get your hopes up; don’t build fragile cloud castles in the sky.
He scoffs at the voice trying to be oh-so poetic but tries to assimilate the piece of advice, only to realize it’s hard - almost too hard. Maybe as the time goes by.
Yoochun coughs. Junsu turns his attention to him.
”Junsu-yah, would it be okay for me to ask a question?” the younger one thinks it’s strange for Yoochun to talk like this and isn’t he supposed to be drunk?
Junsu ends up nodding. Yoochun coughs again and fiddles with the hem of his shirt.
”Who’s Changmin?” to which Junsu freezes but fortunately Yoochun continues, “Yunho mentioned him once… along with some Hyuk-Hyukjae, I think.” And you also looked so happy talking to that Changmin that one time at Jaejoong’s but that Yoochun won’t mention.
”Hyukjae has been my friend since elementary school,” Junsu begins, quite unsure how to explain his best friend to Yoochun but Yoochun just nods, continue, please, and Junsu continues, “he’s a dancer. Everything he does is like dancing - even his humor is like dancing. It’s fluid, but sharp when he wants to. He has been everywhere with me and promises to be everywhere with me in the future. He’s just…,” Junsu stops. The man next to him is staring at him intently so Junsu continues, “…Hyukjae. He’s just Hyukjae.”
Yoochun looks thoughtful.
”What about the other one?” Yoochun remembers his name, Shim Changmin, because Shim Changmin has a key to Junsu’s apartment and Shim Changmin’s house is near Junsu’s and Jung Yunho knows Shim Changmin but he doesn’t want Junsu to feel troubled.
”Why do you wanna know about him too?” Junsu would be lying if he said he didn’t feel pleased, but he would also be lying if he said he didn’t feel weird. Yoochun was even more inquiring than usual.
Yoochun scoffs.
”I’m curious and I’m drunk, so you better speak, woman!” Junsu kicks Yoochun’s leg because of this and the older one quickly mumbles sorry, sorry, I’ll never speak again like that to you, miss, earning a second kick. Yoochun feels like saying something about God and violence, but decides to keep his mouth shut.
Junsu runs his fingers through his own hair. Changmin might be too complex to explain.
”Changmin,” Junsu begins, throat dry, “Uh, I met Changmin in high school. He is a year younger than me, you know, but he’s like… a genius. He goes to the same university where I and Yunho go. He… he is studying medicine,” and Junsu doesn’t know how to continue. Talking about Changmin to Yoochun, to a drunken Yoochun, even, feels surreal.
The silence that follows is awkward and Junsu can hear his own heartbeat. He hopes Yoochun doesn’t.
Yoochun stares at him, “That told nothing about your and his relationship with each other. You told such a life story about that Hyukjae guy, but about this Changmin guy I got to know two things: one, he is a genius and two, uh...,” Yoochun bites his lip, “and… Okay, okay! I only got to know one thing. So, tell me more!”
Junsu lets out a bark-like eu kyang kyang and sighs. He could lie, but when you start lying, you can’t stop.
”Changmin is my first in everything,” Junsu says, embarrassed about how it sounds but it’s true. His relationship with Changmin was explained with only that one sentence and it makes Junsu feel free that he got it out of him. He feels Yoochun fidget next to him.
”So, he is your first-” Yoochun begins but is interrupted by Junsu’s ‘yep’.
”And your first-“
”Yep,” Junsu interrupts again, and Yoochun says aish, why don’t you let me finish?! to which Junsu doesn’t respond, but is daring and leans against Yoochun’s shoulder. The older man stiffens and Junsu feels nervous, but when Yoochun relaxes, Junsu does too.
They’re silent - listening to the traffic, the people walking around and not caring about the fact that they are in a nameless park, surrounded by nameless people.
Junsu’s eyes are droopy when he stands up and Yoochun notices this.
”Don’t fall on me, dolphin-boy! I’m the drunken one here,” Yoochun states and he quickly stands up too, ready to catch Junsu if he was to fall.
The clock is almost 11 pm and Junsu suddenly feels sentimental. He wants to sob and say i already have, i already have fallen but he doesn’t and just waves his hand in the air as a yeah, yeah, whatever, and Yoochun sighs.
”You act like you’re drunk even when you’re not. Get a grip on yourself, Junsu,” he states but Junsu is staggering forward in a very sleepy manner, not hearing or pretending not to hear his words. Yoochun quickly strolls in front of Junsu and kneels down.
”Hop on,” he says and Junsu freezes. Yoochun scoffs, “Do I have to say it twice? Hop on!”
It takes Junsu a couple of seconds to register that Yoochun is offering him a piggyback ride. He clumsily climbs on, circles his arms around Yoochun’s neck and lets his head lean against Yoochun’s left shoulder.
”Are you sure you can do this, with your asthma and all?” Junsu mumbles and Yoochun chuckles.
”You weigh a lot, but I can manage you,” he says and Junsu can hear his smile. It’s somewhat contagious and he finds himself smiling too, before drowsing off.
Junsu’s cheek is warm against the side of Yoochun’s neck.
Part 2