[Alex has avoided outright conversation for most of the event, but he's opened his feed now and again to find out if it's over. This is one such occasion
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No, but it's better than blurting out everything to everyone.
[Did we mention he sounds frightened? He sounds frightened, his voice low and trembling slightly. Not frightened of Tim; it's the 24/7 fear that makes him stressed and snappish, and because of the event he can't cover it up.]
I lie a lot. [A small, frustrated noise at being made to admit it again.] And I wish you hadn't mentioned that, because the fact that you do that frightens me. Crap. This is why I'm hiding!
Oh, it frightens you. How the hell do you think I feel? I don't even know what to do about it. Should I lock myself in my room forever? Commit suicide?
*Okay. He hadn't meant to say that.*
You know what... nevermind. I don't even know why I talk to you..
*Ever heard Tim sound miserable before? Here's your chance.*
[Welp, Alex feels like a complete and utter dick.]
I wish I had all the answers, okay? [he snaps, despite his efforts to stay silent.] I wish I could just magic up a solution. But when I saw him on the screen I could hardly even talk, so when I see him in real life, I don't know if I'll be able to attack him - but I know that I have to do something to stop him because I'm the one who started this, he was after me and [FUUUCK HE CAN'T STOP TALKING] I wish I'd burned those fucking tapes when I had the chance. It's my fault he's hurting you, it's my fault he's hurting J, all of this is my fault.
[The absolute cherry on the whole shit cake would be starting to cry, wouldn't it? So of course, the event obliges. Alex scrubs angrily at his eyes, but there's no concealing of emotions and he's not allowed to keep his voice from choking.]
*There's stunned silence as Tim processes all of this.*
I ... Jeez, don't cry. It's not your fault.
*He doesn't know that but it's not really a lie since he has no idea what you're talking about when you mention burning tapes. He's searching for something comforting to say but with their current predicament, nothing is really coming to mind.*
I'm just .. stressed, you know? And making light of the situation is how I cope.
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Hey Tim.
Shit.
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Having fun hiding?
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[Did we mention he sounds frightened? He sounds frightened, his voice low and trembling slightly. Not frightened of Tim; it's the 24/7 fear that makes him stressed and snappish, and because of the event he can't cover it up.]
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I managed to get through 3 whole days without mentioning that I sometimes turn into a masked drug addict.
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*Okay. He hadn't meant to say that.*
You know what... nevermind. I don't even know why I talk to you..
*Ever heard Tim sound miserable before? Here's your chance.*
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I wish I had all the answers, okay? [he snaps, despite his efforts to stay silent.] I wish I could just magic up a solution. But when I saw him on the screen I could hardly even talk, so when I see him in real life, I don't know if I'll be able to attack him - but I know that I have to do something to stop him because I'm the one who started this, he was after me and [FUUUCK HE CAN'T STOP TALKING] I wish I'd burned those fucking tapes when I had the chance. It's my fault he's hurting you, it's my fault he's hurting J, all of this is my fault.
[The absolute cherry on the whole shit cake would be starting to cry, wouldn't it? So of course, the event obliges. Alex scrubs angrily at his eyes, but there's no concealing of emotions and he's not allowed to keep his voice from choking.]
So I'm sorry I don't have the answers right now.
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I ... Jeez, don't cry. It's not your fault.
*He doesn't know that but it's not really a lie since he has no idea what you're talking about when you mention burning tapes. He's searching for something comforting to say but with their current predicament, nothing is really coming to mind.*
I'm just .. stressed, you know? And making light of the situation is how I cope.
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[You can add "deep, deep embarrassment" to the list of emotions staining his voice right now.]
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[...it wasn't meant to come out as bluntly as that.]
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*Instead of shutting the feed off like a normal person he chucks the communicator against a wall, betraying how hurt he feels.*
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