AB/BtVS FF: Alive at Last 44/? (Willow/Asher)
TITLE: Alive at Last
AUTHOR: 38gnihsurc
RATING: en.sea.xvii overall
PAIRING: Willow/Asher
SPOILERS: Up until Micah for AB; the series for BtVS, even though I don't really remember much of it, since I haven't watched the last seasons in ages.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own anyone. I'm just having a little fun.
NOTES: This story is AU, since it's a crossover; because of that, I've taken a few creative liberties with explaining why the BtVS vampires are different than the AB vampires, and so on.
Previous Chapters: 1-3, 4, 5, 6-7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23-4, 25, 26-7, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32-3, 34, 35-6, 37-8, 39, 40-41, 42, 43
PART FORTY-FOUR
After two quick showers, changes of clothes, and the formal greeting with the Master of the City, Angel and his friends were seated in the sitting room with Willow, Asher, Jean-Claude, and Anita. Nathaniel and Micah left to change the bed sheets in Jean-Claude's bedroom and Jason was helping those who had been asked to bring in their guests' luggage.
"So, let me get this straight," Angel said, looking from Willow to Asher, who had gone back to hiding his scars in shadows, hair, and clothing. "You're Asher's human servant."
Willow smiled and nodded. "Yeah."
"But... he's... a vampire."
Spike rolled his eyes and snorted. "Honestly, Peaches, you'd think you'd be less judgmental. I guess the cold wood's back in style, mate." He saluted Willow. "Good for you, Red." He looked at Anita and saluted her, too. "Same goes to you, Luv. Nothing makes me happier than to see two attractive ladies like yourselves realisin' the potential we vamps have in the sack."
"Oh god," Willow muttered, rolling her eyes.
"I second that," Anita said with a little smile in Willow's direction.
Willow smiled at her for a moment, earlier jealousy forgotten, before turning her gaze onto Angel. "Hey," she said quietly as she leaned out of Asher's one-armed hug and reached to touch his knee. "I'm sorry about Fred. And Wesley... but mainly how everything with Fred happened. If I had been there, I would've come to you," she said in that same quiet voice. "Or, I would've at least questioned Giles' insistence to stay away from you," she added with a little flush in her cheeks.
Angel frowned. "I... I didn't want to talk about---I mean, I know... but... it... Buffy... Giles---"
Spike cleared his throat as he fished his lighter out of his pocket. "What he means to say is, it sucks, it'll always suck, and he's pretty pissed at Buffy for thinkin' he went all dark," he said. "But, he luvs her, and that makes 'im crazy... all at the same time. Days of Our soddin' Lives, Red."
Angel growled. Spike growled back and then looked at Jean-Claude. "Do you mind if I smoke in here?"
"I do not, but ma petite will," Jean-Claude replied.
"That's a pretty delicate pet name for someone who does as much damage as she does," Spike commented.
"Don't push her, Spike," Willow warned.
"And now, he's gonna be pushing her all week," Gunn muttered. He looked at Anita and asked, "When's your backup gettin' here?"
"Probably tomorrow," Anita replied as she looked down at the documents and blueprints Angel had brought with him. "You're saying all of the law firms are built the same?"
"Most of them," Angel told her. "It's strange, but if one of us has to get inside to find records or proof... we have a good chance of getting exactly where we need to go."
Gunn shrugged. "Yeah, but we don't know if they've got vampire detectors or---"
"We're legal citizens now, mate," Spike pointed out. "Going in at night, like the rest of our kind, shouldn't trip any alarm."
Angel tilted his head towards Spike. "He may have a point," he conceded.
"I could go during the day," Willow offered. "Connor and I---"
"No!" Angel and Asher exclaimed at the same time.
"Whoa..." Willow breathed. "Surround-sound scolding. Neat. Kinda scary, though, guys."
Asher tucked her against his side, and kissed her temple. "I do not want you going into that place without someone I trust protecting you," he said quietly.
"Worrywart."
"Sticks and stones, mon colibri," Asher murmured.
"Mon coli-what?" Gunn asked.
Spike flicked his lighter on and snapped it shut. "His hummin'bird, mate," he said. "Pretty accurate description of Red, actually."
Willow looked around the room and she couldn't deny that the situation into which she dropped herself was very weird. Seeing Angel, Spike, and Gunn was a reminder of her past and while they knew about vampires and demons and magic, it still felt weird to have them in the same room as Asher, Jean-Claude, and Anita.
The conversation moved back to Wolfram and Hart and the possibility of rogue slayers committing the murders, but Willow still couldn't get over the weirdness of the situation.
"I... I left my laptop in our suite," Willow said to Asher, quietly, referring to the gift he had given her the day before the cybercafé opened for business. "I'm gonna go get it."
Asher arched an eyebrow in silent question. She smiled a bit and then silently said, "It's just a little weird... to see people from my past. I need a few minutes, okay?"
"Call for me if you need anything," he insisted in her mind.
Willow nodded as she used their link to reply. "I will. Just give me a few minutes while you talk shop with Angel, Spike, and Gunn, and I'll be back."
"Should I call for Jason?"
She shook her head. "No... no, no. I just... it's kind of like my past makes me sad and dizzy. And I just wanna catch my breath," she told him silently.
He nodded. She kissed his cheeks before kissing his lips and then she excused herself from the room, ignoring the puzzled looks from Gunn, Angel, and Spike. She assumed that someone would explain that they could communicate silently, through their bond, and she needed to get away for a few minutes.
She went to their suite and unplugged her laptop after folding it shut, and she had intended to leave and make her way back to the sitting room, but she couldn't make herself leave the privacy of her home she shared with Asher. She paced around the outer chamber, silently reminding herself that Angel and his colleagues wouldn't frown upon her for being with Asher and using magic. They walked a blurrier line than she did, so they could barely judge her for her actions.
When she thought she had thoroughly convinced herself to go back into the sitting room, she left the safety of her suite and started to walk down the hall. But, she stopped when she was about halfway between her home and the room where everyone had gathered.
Willow closed her eyes and leaned back against the cool wall and resumed telling herself that the past couldn't hurt her and that the people in that room wouldn't judge the decisions she made.
"Willow?"
She opened her eyes and saw Nathaniel walking from the other end of the hall, with Micah at his side.
"Oh... hi," she said, blushing a little.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
She nodded a little. "Y-yeah."
"Liar," Micah commented, a small smile teasing his lips. "Don't want to see your friends?"
Willow appreciated Micah and his ability to cut to the chase, to the crux of the situation, when they were figuring out something that had nothing to do with her life. But, in that instance, she wanted to curse him and his talent.
"I do," she said quietly, "but... seeing them reminds me of the friends I left behind. Angel left Sunnydale before we did... but he still reminds me of so much that happened there. Spike, too. It just... it... you know."
"Memories," Nathaniel said. "Bad ones... or good ones?"
"Both," Willow whispered.
"And you're afraid of being judged?" Micah asked, but in a way that made it seem like it wasn't a question at all. She turned and looked at him and he smiled. "You've changed a lot from the girl I met in the hospital," he told her. "It's easy for me to imagine that you've probably changed even more from the girl you used to be when they knew you."
Nathaniel spoke up next. "And... you're afraid that they'll ruin your happiness. Because you are a hell of a lot happier than you were when you first showed up here... you're in love and you have your familiars." He paused to wink, which made Willow chuckle a little. "And you're in a group of people that aren't afraid of you." He put his hand on Willow's shoulder and then said, "Don't let them take away your happiness, okay? It's just that simple."
"You guys... it's just... just like that, huh?"
The younger wereleopard nodded. "Yeah," he replied.
Micah smiled. "If your life is working the way it is now... don't let anyone---including yourself---wreck it."
Willow opened her mouth to respond to what Micah said, but Jason had appeared behind the small group and he spoke next. "Sounds like some advice Anita got a few times," he said quietly.
"Did she follow it?" Willow asked.
He shrugged. "Not at first, but I think she's finally getting the hang of it."
Willow turned her head and looked down the hall, towards the sitting room where everyone had gathered. She sighed and furrowed her brow, a quiet whimper escaping her lips. When Jason slipped his hand into hers, she looked at him and then at Nathaniel and then at Micah.
The more dominant wereleopard smiled and shrugged. "I'm gonna go inside and meet your friends," he told her. "See you in a bit, okay? Because, if not... I'm gonna send Asher out here."
Willow smiled a bit. "I'll be in soon," she promised.
Once Micah left them alone, Nathaniel and Jason each took a side of Willow and squeezed her hands with theirs. Willow closed her eyes and summoned the resolve to return to the sitting room. She could admit to herself that she felt better having them around; she knew that they had somehow been roped into being her familiars, which was weird and comforting at the same time.
"You feel better," Nathaniel said quietly.
Willow opened her eyes and looked at him. "Don't you mind being a calming influence on me?"
He shook his head. "No... it's kind of nice."
Jason smiled. "It's just friendship and loyalty, Wills," he said, squeezing her hand. "But magically enhanced."
"I don't want to take your free will away," she protested.
The werewolf shook his head. "You didn't. We were friends before this happened. And Nathaniel and I were helping you get used to our wacky world before you took Asher's marks," he reminded her. "And now, we help you keep your magical stability, too. We'll figure out what it really means, but until then, I'm not going to lose any sleep over it."
"But, what if---"
Nathaniel cut her off. "What if we feel the need to protect you more? What if we want to be around you more?"
"Yeah," she whispered.
Jason snorted. "Asher won't kick us out of bed if we wanna cuddle and keep you warm. Plus... we're already used to adjusting to Anita's needs and I think everyone's starting to get the hang of it. What's one more?"
"But... oh, man, this is complicated," she moaned.
Nathaniel squeezed the hand of hers that he was holding. "Complicated? I'm dating a woman who's dating five or six other men, depending on the day and the emergency," he pointed out. "This is not complicated."
Jason nudged her. "Close your eyes, okay, Wills?"
"And then what?" she asked once she had closed her eyes.
"Just breathe. And know that we're next to you," he said, inching closer to her. Nathaniel quickly followed his lead and she found herself pressed between two very solid and very male bodies. "We've got your back. Let us do the worrying for a little while, okay?"
She leaned forward and rested her head on Nathaniel's shoulder. His scent, vanilla and something else, wafted into her nose and into her mind. She let her guards down and she could immediately feel Asher inside her thoughts, sifting through her worries and trying to understand what she was doing in the hallway. He disappeared without saying a word, but not before he sent warm feelings her way, meant to distract her nerves.
"I feel better," she whispered.
"Good," Nathaniel whispered back.
"Ready to go back in?" Jason asked.
She nodded and the two shapeshifters escorted her down the hall and into the sitting room. The instant they walked into the room, Willow saw Spike's eyebrows jump up and she immediately started to calculate how long it would take her to rush into the hallway. Jason squeezed her hand, though, and she felt those thoughts being chased away by the presence of his wolf; she couldn't explain it, but it felt like his animal---as well as Nathaniel's animal---loaned her what she needed.
"Two more beaus?" Spike inquired.
Angel nudged him. "Knock it off, Spike," he growled.
"Or, what, you great, big poofter?" Spike shot back.
Asher opened his mind to Willow. She immediately started to explain how she was feeling but Asher arched an eyebrow over his calming blue eye that wasn't hidden by his hair and he silently murmured, "Bring your familiars and come to me. We'll comfort you."
She nodded and started to walk towards him. Jason and Nathaniel released her hands but they stayed close to her as she moved to the vacant spot on the sofa between Asher and Anita. Nathaniel sat on the floor between Willow and Anita and Jason sat in front of Willow, leaning back against her legs as Willow leaned against Asher.
"So... what did we decide while I was gone?" Willow asked.
"Your life's gotten pretty interestin', Red," Spike said in response.
Willow blushed. "Yeah, well, St. Louis is an interesting city," she replied, trying to keep her voice even. Jason put his hand on her lower leg and gently rubbed it. "But... what about this mystery? I mean... what's our next move?"
Gunn told her that he would meet up with Connor and that they would go to the motel and watch the girls; if they could, they would track one or two of them and see if they could learn anything about them that way. Willow was nervous about that but they told her they wouldn't be splitting up, so she felt a little better that they were adhering to the rule 'safety in numbers.' Then, Angel asked if she could hack into the law firm's network and see if there was any connection between them and the murders.
Willow was nervous about that. She didn't want to use the computers at the cybercafé and she didn't want to use her laptop, because from what she understood, the lawyers worked with strong powers and she knew they would be able to figure out who had broken into their network eventually. She didn't want to bring any more trouble to the vampires and the shapeshifters.
Anita suggested that they go to a local campus, like Wash U, and use their computers. Willow thought that was a good plan; it would buy them more time to get the information they needed and to get away before the lawyers' security team realised what happened.
But, the plan rested on the idea that Willow would be able to break in undetected and actually find any accessible information.
She was worried about that. Angel was counting on her; the family she had made for herself in St. Louis was counting on her.
She had agreed to try and that seemed to satisfy everyone who was watching her with curious, eager eyes. But, she was still feeling that worry after Angel, Spike, and Gunn went to the guest rooms, and after Asher took her to their suite, shortly before dawn. She could even sense that Asher was concerned; normally, he tried to keep feelings like that from her but not on that night.
Willow kissed him once they were alone, letting her hands seek his. He accepted her embrace and brought her across the room, hesitating in the doorway to their bedroom.
"How is it that your kiss calms me so?" he asked her over their mental bond as he brushed his nose against hers. "I feel anxiety, concern... but you touch me and... they fade away."
"It's the same for me," she admitted. "You didn't notice when I was sitting with you?"
Asher replied with a kiss, and then he pulled away and replied with words, spoken aloud. "I noticed," he whispered. "Why did you think I kept you so close?"
"Oh," she whispered.
He smiled a bit. She reached up towards his face on impulse and smoothed his hair back, off of his face. Asher's smile faded as her thumbs caressed his smooth and scarred cheeks but she didn't let him move away from her. He was comfortable around her, but when she focused on the differences in his flesh, his discomfort became more real. She wished she could chase those insecurities and bad memories away from him; she leaned up on her toes and and kissed both sides of his face.
She kissed his chin, his jaw, his temples, his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose, and then his lips. Asher sighed and leaned against the wall as she tried to show him that she loved all of him.
"Why---"
"Shhh," she whispered, interrupting him.
Asher allowed her to kiss his face a few more times, but then he stopped her by drawing her into a warm embrace. He hugged her to his body and kissed the top of her head as his hands caressed her back and shoulders.
"What are you---"
"Shhh," he whispered, mimicking her interruption from a moment ago.
She closed her eyes and tucked her face into his shirt. She could only smell him but that was all she ever needed; she didn't feel as worried as she had, as jealous as she had, either, and something much more calming took residence in her heart.
"Thank you," she mumbled, reaching up and holding onto his shoulders as he hugged her.
"It is lovely to see you so loved, mon chardonneret, by someone else who knows how magnificent you are," Jean-Claude said from the open entrance to their suite.
Asher lifted his head and looked at the other vampire. Willow knew why he was there---dawn was approaching and Anita had problems sleeping with a dead vampire---and she didn't mind the intrusion. She was almost used to sharing the bed with them during the day because Anita stayed at the Circus often enough.
"The cats kicked you out of bed?" Willow asked, smiling.
"I offered it to them," he said with a smile of his own.
Willow kissed Asher's cheek and then said, "Why don't you guys go get a bath or whatever before bed?"
"Are you certain?" Asher asked Willow.
She smiled more and nodded. "I'm not sleepy yet. My brain's a little wired... thinking about the hacking and stuff... so... I'm gonna make some tea first," she explained. "Go get comfy," she said, looking at both vampires. She smiled again. "Really."
Asher tugged her close again for a another kiss and then he allowed her to step away from him.
Willow started to move away, but on impulse, she rushed back and kissed him, pressing her lips to his for a passionate, good-night kiss. He smiled as she stepped back and she smiled up at him in silent reply. Once she was at Jean-Claude's side, she put her hand on his arm and quickly leaned up to kiss his cheek, before wishing them both a good sleep and leaving the suite.
AUTHOR: 38gnihsurc
RATING: en.sea.xvii overall
PAIRING: Willow/Asher
SPOILERS: Up until Micah for AB; the series for BtVS, even though I don't really remember much of it, since I haven't watched the last seasons in ages.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own anyone. I'm just having a little fun.
NOTES: This story is AU, since it's a crossover; because of that, I've taken a few creative liberties with explaining why the BtVS vampires are different than the AB vampires, and so on.
Previous Chapters: 1-3, 4, 5, 6-7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23-4, 25, 26-7, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32-3, 34, 35-6, 37-8, 39, 40-41, 42, 43
PART FORTY-FOUR
After two quick showers, changes of clothes, and the formal greeting with the Master of the City, Angel and his friends were seated in the sitting room with Willow, Asher, Jean-Claude, and Anita. Nathaniel and Micah left to change the bed sheets in Jean-Claude's bedroom and Jason was helping those who had been asked to bring in their guests' luggage.
"So, let me get this straight," Angel said, looking from Willow to Asher, who had gone back to hiding his scars in shadows, hair, and clothing. "You're Asher's human servant."
Willow smiled and nodded. "Yeah."
"But... he's... a vampire."
Spike rolled his eyes and snorted. "Honestly, Peaches, you'd think you'd be less judgmental. I guess the cold wood's back in style, mate." He saluted Willow. "Good for you, Red." He looked at Anita and saluted her, too. "Same goes to you, Luv. Nothing makes me happier than to see two attractive ladies like yourselves realisin' the potential we vamps have in the sack."
"Oh god," Willow muttered, rolling her eyes.
"I second that," Anita said with a little smile in Willow's direction.
Willow smiled at her for a moment, earlier jealousy forgotten, before turning her gaze onto Angel. "Hey," she said quietly as she leaned out of Asher's one-armed hug and reached to touch his knee. "I'm sorry about Fred. And Wesley... but mainly how everything with Fred happened. If I had been there, I would've come to you," she said in that same quiet voice. "Or, I would've at least questioned Giles' insistence to stay away from you," she added with a little flush in her cheeks.
Angel frowned. "I... I didn't want to talk about---I mean, I know... but... it... Buffy... Giles---"
Spike cleared his throat as he fished his lighter out of his pocket. "What he means to say is, it sucks, it'll always suck, and he's pretty pissed at Buffy for thinkin' he went all dark," he said. "But, he luvs her, and that makes 'im crazy... all at the same time. Days of Our soddin' Lives, Red."
Angel growled. Spike growled back and then looked at Jean-Claude. "Do you mind if I smoke in here?"
"I do not, but ma petite will," Jean-Claude replied.
"That's a pretty delicate pet name for someone who does as much damage as she does," Spike commented.
"Don't push her, Spike," Willow warned.
"And now, he's gonna be pushing her all week," Gunn muttered. He looked at Anita and asked, "When's your backup gettin' here?"
"Probably tomorrow," Anita replied as she looked down at the documents and blueprints Angel had brought with him. "You're saying all of the law firms are built the same?"
"Most of them," Angel told her. "It's strange, but if one of us has to get inside to find records or proof... we have a good chance of getting exactly where we need to go."
Gunn shrugged. "Yeah, but we don't know if they've got vampire detectors or---"
"We're legal citizens now, mate," Spike pointed out. "Going in at night, like the rest of our kind, shouldn't trip any alarm."
Angel tilted his head towards Spike. "He may have a point," he conceded.
"I could go during the day," Willow offered. "Connor and I---"
"No!" Angel and Asher exclaimed at the same time.
"Whoa..." Willow breathed. "Surround-sound scolding. Neat. Kinda scary, though, guys."
Asher tucked her against his side, and kissed her temple. "I do not want you going into that place without someone I trust protecting you," he said quietly.
"Worrywart."
"Sticks and stones, mon colibri," Asher murmured.
"Mon coli-what?" Gunn asked.
Spike flicked his lighter on and snapped it shut. "His hummin'bird, mate," he said. "Pretty accurate description of Red, actually."
Willow looked around the room and she couldn't deny that the situation into which she dropped herself was very weird. Seeing Angel, Spike, and Gunn was a reminder of her past and while they knew about vampires and demons and magic, it still felt weird to have them in the same room as Asher, Jean-Claude, and Anita.
The conversation moved back to Wolfram and Hart and the possibility of rogue slayers committing the murders, but Willow still couldn't get over the weirdness of the situation.
"I... I left my laptop in our suite," Willow said to Asher, quietly, referring to the gift he had given her the day before the cybercafé opened for business. "I'm gonna go get it."
Asher arched an eyebrow in silent question. She smiled a bit and then silently said, "It's just a little weird... to see people from my past. I need a few minutes, okay?"
"Call for me if you need anything," he insisted in her mind.
Willow nodded as she used their link to reply. "I will. Just give me a few minutes while you talk shop with Angel, Spike, and Gunn, and I'll be back."
"Should I call for Jason?"
She shook her head. "No... no, no. I just... it's kind of like my past makes me sad and dizzy. And I just wanna catch my breath," she told him silently.
He nodded. She kissed his cheeks before kissing his lips and then she excused herself from the room, ignoring the puzzled looks from Gunn, Angel, and Spike. She assumed that someone would explain that they could communicate silently, through their bond, and she needed to get away for a few minutes.
She went to their suite and unplugged her laptop after folding it shut, and she had intended to leave and make her way back to the sitting room, but she couldn't make herself leave the privacy of her home she shared with Asher. She paced around the outer chamber, silently reminding herself that Angel and his colleagues wouldn't frown upon her for being with Asher and using magic. They walked a blurrier line than she did, so they could barely judge her for her actions.
When she thought she had thoroughly convinced herself to go back into the sitting room, she left the safety of her suite and started to walk down the hall. But, she stopped when she was about halfway between her home and the room where everyone had gathered.
Willow closed her eyes and leaned back against the cool wall and resumed telling herself that the past couldn't hurt her and that the people in that room wouldn't judge the decisions she made.
"Willow?"
She opened her eyes and saw Nathaniel walking from the other end of the hall, with Micah at his side.
"Oh... hi," she said, blushing a little.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
She nodded a little. "Y-yeah."
"Liar," Micah commented, a small smile teasing his lips. "Don't want to see your friends?"
Willow appreciated Micah and his ability to cut to the chase, to the crux of the situation, when they were figuring out something that had nothing to do with her life. But, in that instance, she wanted to curse him and his talent.
"I do," she said quietly, "but... seeing them reminds me of the friends I left behind. Angel left Sunnydale before we did... but he still reminds me of so much that happened there. Spike, too. It just... it... you know."
"Memories," Nathaniel said. "Bad ones... or good ones?"
"Both," Willow whispered.
"And you're afraid of being judged?" Micah asked, but in a way that made it seem like it wasn't a question at all. She turned and looked at him and he smiled. "You've changed a lot from the girl I met in the hospital," he told her. "It's easy for me to imagine that you've probably changed even more from the girl you used to be when they knew you."
Nathaniel spoke up next. "And... you're afraid that they'll ruin your happiness. Because you are a hell of a lot happier than you were when you first showed up here... you're in love and you have your familiars." He paused to wink, which made Willow chuckle a little. "And you're in a group of people that aren't afraid of you." He put his hand on Willow's shoulder and then said, "Don't let them take away your happiness, okay? It's just that simple."
"You guys... it's just... just like that, huh?"
The younger wereleopard nodded. "Yeah," he replied.
Micah smiled. "If your life is working the way it is now... don't let anyone---including yourself---wreck it."
Willow opened her mouth to respond to what Micah said, but Jason had appeared behind the small group and he spoke next. "Sounds like some advice Anita got a few times," he said quietly.
"Did she follow it?" Willow asked.
He shrugged. "Not at first, but I think she's finally getting the hang of it."
Willow turned her head and looked down the hall, towards the sitting room where everyone had gathered. She sighed and furrowed her brow, a quiet whimper escaping her lips. When Jason slipped his hand into hers, she looked at him and then at Nathaniel and then at Micah.
The more dominant wereleopard smiled and shrugged. "I'm gonna go inside and meet your friends," he told her. "See you in a bit, okay? Because, if not... I'm gonna send Asher out here."
Willow smiled a bit. "I'll be in soon," she promised.
Once Micah left them alone, Nathaniel and Jason each took a side of Willow and squeezed her hands with theirs. Willow closed her eyes and summoned the resolve to return to the sitting room. She could admit to herself that she felt better having them around; she knew that they had somehow been roped into being her familiars, which was weird and comforting at the same time.
"You feel better," Nathaniel said quietly.
Willow opened her eyes and looked at him. "Don't you mind being a calming influence on me?"
He shook his head. "No... it's kind of nice."
Jason smiled. "It's just friendship and loyalty, Wills," he said, squeezing her hand. "But magically enhanced."
"I don't want to take your free will away," she protested.
The werewolf shook his head. "You didn't. We were friends before this happened. And Nathaniel and I were helping you get used to our wacky world before you took Asher's marks," he reminded her. "And now, we help you keep your magical stability, too. We'll figure out what it really means, but until then, I'm not going to lose any sleep over it."
"But, what if---"
Nathaniel cut her off. "What if we feel the need to protect you more? What if we want to be around you more?"
"Yeah," she whispered.
Jason snorted. "Asher won't kick us out of bed if we wanna cuddle and keep you warm. Plus... we're already used to adjusting to Anita's needs and I think everyone's starting to get the hang of it. What's one more?"
"But... oh, man, this is complicated," she moaned.
Nathaniel squeezed the hand of hers that he was holding. "Complicated? I'm dating a woman who's dating five or six other men, depending on the day and the emergency," he pointed out. "This is not complicated."
Jason nudged her. "Close your eyes, okay, Wills?"
"And then what?" she asked once she had closed her eyes.
"Just breathe. And know that we're next to you," he said, inching closer to her. Nathaniel quickly followed his lead and she found herself pressed between two very solid and very male bodies. "We've got your back. Let us do the worrying for a little while, okay?"
She leaned forward and rested her head on Nathaniel's shoulder. His scent, vanilla and something else, wafted into her nose and into her mind. She let her guards down and she could immediately feel Asher inside her thoughts, sifting through her worries and trying to understand what she was doing in the hallway. He disappeared without saying a word, but not before he sent warm feelings her way, meant to distract her nerves.
"I feel better," she whispered.
"Good," Nathaniel whispered back.
"Ready to go back in?" Jason asked.
She nodded and the two shapeshifters escorted her down the hall and into the sitting room. The instant they walked into the room, Willow saw Spike's eyebrows jump up and she immediately started to calculate how long it would take her to rush into the hallway. Jason squeezed her hand, though, and she felt those thoughts being chased away by the presence of his wolf; she couldn't explain it, but it felt like his animal---as well as Nathaniel's animal---loaned her what she needed.
"Two more beaus?" Spike inquired.
Angel nudged him. "Knock it off, Spike," he growled.
"Or, what, you great, big poofter?" Spike shot back.
Asher opened his mind to Willow. She immediately started to explain how she was feeling but Asher arched an eyebrow over his calming blue eye that wasn't hidden by his hair and he silently murmured, "Bring your familiars and come to me. We'll comfort you."
She nodded and started to walk towards him. Jason and Nathaniel released her hands but they stayed close to her as she moved to the vacant spot on the sofa between Asher and Anita. Nathaniel sat on the floor between Willow and Anita and Jason sat in front of Willow, leaning back against her legs as Willow leaned against Asher.
"So... what did we decide while I was gone?" Willow asked.
"Your life's gotten pretty interestin', Red," Spike said in response.
Willow blushed. "Yeah, well, St. Louis is an interesting city," she replied, trying to keep her voice even. Jason put his hand on her lower leg and gently rubbed it. "But... what about this mystery? I mean... what's our next move?"
Gunn told her that he would meet up with Connor and that they would go to the motel and watch the girls; if they could, they would track one or two of them and see if they could learn anything about them that way. Willow was nervous about that but they told her they wouldn't be splitting up, so she felt a little better that they were adhering to the rule 'safety in numbers.' Then, Angel asked if she could hack into the law firm's network and see if there was any connection between them and the murders.
Willow was nervous about that. She didn't want to use the computers at the cybercafé and she didn't want to use her laptop, because from what she understood, the lawyers worked with strong powers and she knew they would be able to figure out who had broken into their network eventually. She didn't want to bring any more trouble to the vampires and the shapeshifters.
Anita suggested that they go to a local campus, like Wash U, and use their computers. Willow thought that was a good plan; it would buy them more time to get the information they needed and to get away before the lawyers' security team realised what happened.
But, the plan rested on the idea that Willow would be able to break in undetected and actually find any accessible information.
She was worried about that. Angel was counting on her; the family she had made for herself in St. Louis was counting on her.
She had agreed to try and that seemed to satisfy everyone who was watching her with curious, eager eyes. But, she was still feeling that worry after Angel, Spike, and Gunn went to the guest rooms, and after Asher took her to their suite, shortly before dawn. She could even sense that Asher was concerned; normally, he tried to keep feelings like that from her but not on that night.
Willow kissed him once they were alone, letting her hands seek his. He accepted her embrace and brought her across the room, hesitating in the doorway to their bedroom.
"How is it that your kiss calms me so?" he asked her over their mental bond as he brushed his nose against hers. "I feel anxiety, concern... but you touch me and... they fade away."
"It's the same for me," she admitted. "You didn't notice when I was sitting with you?"
Asher replied with a kiss, and then he pulled away and replied with words, spoken aloud. "I noticed," he whispered. "Why did you think I kept you so close?"
"Oh," she whispered.
He smiled a bit. She reached up towards his face on impulse and smoothed his hair back, off of his face. Asher's smile faded as her thumbs caressed his smooth and scarred cheeks but she didn't let him move away from her. He was comfortable around her, but when she focused on the differences in his flesh, his discomfort became more real. She wished she could chase those insecurities and bad memories away from him; she leaned up on her toes and and kissed both sides of his face.
She kissed his chin, his jaw, his temples, his forehead, his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose, and then his lips. Asher sighed and leaned against the wall as she tried to show him that she loved all of him.
"Why---"
"Shhh," she whispered, interrupting him.
Asher allowed her to kiss his face a few more times, but then he stopped her by drawing her into a warm embrace. He hugged her to his body and kissed the top of her head as his hands caressed her back and shoulders.
"What are you---"
"Shhh," he whispered, mimicking her interruption from a moment ago.
She closed her eyes and tucked her face into his shirt. She could only smell him but that was all she ever needed; she didn't feel as worried as she had, as jealous as she had, either, and something much more calming took residence in her heart.
"Thank you," she mumbled, reaching up and holding onto his shoulders as he hugged her.
"It is lovely to see you so loved, mon chardonneret, by someone else who knows how magnificent you are," Jean-Claude said from the open entrance to their suite.
Asher lifted his head and looked at the other vampire. Willow knew why he was there---dawn was approaching and Anita had problems sleeping with a dead vampire---and she didn't mind the intrusion. She was almost used to sharing the bed with them during the day because Anita stayed at the Circus often enough.
"The cats kicked you out of bed?" Willow asked, smiling.
"I offered it to them," he said with a smile of his own.
Willow kissed Asher's cheek and then said, "Why don't you guys go get a bath or whatever before bed?"
"Are you certain?" Asher asked Willow.
She smiled more and nodded. "I'm not sleepy yet. My brain's a little wired... thinking about the hacking and stuff... so... I'm gonna make some tea first," she explained. "Go get comfy," she said, looking at both vampires. She smiled again. "Really."
Asher tugged her close again for a another kiss and then he allowed her to step away from him.
Willow started to move away, but on impulse, she rushed back and kissed him, pressing her lips to his for a passionate, good-night kiss. He smiled as she stepped back and she smiled up at him in silent reply. Once she was at Jean-Claude's side, she put her hand on his arm and quickly leaned up to kiss his cheek, before wishing them both a good sleep and leaving the suite.