[June 23] [Evangelion] Discovery
Title: Discovery
Day/Theme: June 23, "a mechanical doll that falls to pieces every night"
Series: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Character/Pairing: Rei
Rating: PG
Rei sat on the edge of her bed and watched the light filtering in from outside begin to fade. She had no artificial lights on. In some time, all the light would be faded. In some time after that, she would need to go to sleep.
Rei blinked.
The longer she was alive, the more going to sleep stirred up emotions and experiences in her.
"These emotions and experiences are called 'dreams,'" she said. Nobody could hear her. She was alone. The longer she was alive, the more being alone stirred up emotions in her. She did not know what these emotions were called, but they came on strongest when the light faded. She didn't think she liked them.
But sometimes she liked the dreams. Sometimes, they gave her answers that she never found when she was awake. When she was awake, she could not turn to Shinji and ask him, "What do I feel for you?" That would be strange. That would open her up. She was not supposed to be opened up.
Once, in a dream, she had reached into Shinji's mouth and pulled a key from under his tongue. Then she had put the key between her ribs and unlocked a panel. She had opened it and showed her heart to Shinji. "I have now discovered this," she had said. "I have now discovered I have a heart."
When she was awake, flesh and bones covered her heart. Rei lifted a hand from her lap and pressed it over her ribcage, where her heart should be. She counted the beats. Did they prove she had a heart, or were they meaningless numbers? It was easier to decide, when she was asleep.
It was entirely dark now. Rei had nothing else to do. She lay down in bed, closed her eyes, and slept.
Neurons fired. An image passed through her brain: Unit 01 and Unit 02 dancing together to defeat an Angel...
Awareness came back to Rei within her own mind. "Can I also dance?" she asked Gendo. He nodded. She began to dance. She did not know whether she was any good at it. She did not know whether it mattered. Her fingers all fell off, then both her arms up to the elbows. Did that matter?
"Yes," Shinji said. "It matters to me, Ayanami."
Rei smiled as her head fell off. Then she opened her eyes.
"I see," she said. "That is called a nightmare."
Day/Theme: June 23, "a mechanical doll that falls to pieces every night"
Series: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Character/Pairing: Rei
Rating: PG
Rei sat on the edge of her bed and watched the light filtering in from outside begin to fade. She had no artificial lights on. In some time, all the light would be faded. In some time after that, she would need to go to sleep.
Rei blinked.
The longer she was alive, the more going to sleep stirred up emotions and experiences in her.
"These emotions and experiences are called 'dreams,'" she said. Nobody could hear her. She was alone. The longer she was alive, the more being alone stirred up emotions in her. She did not know what these emotions were called, but they came on strongest when the light faded. She didn't think she liked them.
But sometimes she liked the dreams. Sometimes, they gave her answers that she never found when she was awake. When she was awake, she could not turn to Shinji and ask him, "What do I feel for you?" That would be strange. That would open her up. She was not supposed to be opened up.
Once, in a dream, she had reached into Shinji's mouth and pulled a key from under his tongue. Then she had put the key between her ribs and unlocked a panel. She had opened it and showed her heart to Shinji. "I have now discovered this," she had said. "I have now discovered I have a heart."
When she was awake, flesh and bones covered her heart. Rei lifted a hand from her lap and pressed it over her ribcage, where her heart should be. She counted the beats. Did they prove she had a heart, or were they meaningless numbers? It was easier to decide, when she was asleep.
It was entirely dark now. Rei had nothing else to do. She lay down in bed, closed her eyes, and slept.
Neurons fired. An image passed through her brain: Unit 01 and Unit 02 dancing together to defeat an Angel...
Awareness came back to Rei within her own mind. "Can I also dance?" she asked Gendo. He nodded. She began to dance. She did not know whether she was any good at it. She did not know whether it mattered. Her fingers all fell off, then both her arms up to the elbows. Did that matter?
"Yes," Shinji said. "It matters to me, Ayanami."
Rei smiled as her head fell off. Then she opened her eyes.
"I see," she said. "That is called a nightmare."