Comments | 20_truths: [Uzumaki Naruto and Kyuubi no Kitsune] [wingsover]

wingsover in 20_truths

[Uzumaki Naruto and Kyuubi no Kitsune] [wingsover]

Jun 20, 2006 22:36

Title: Demon Within
Author: wingsover
Characters/Pairings/Group: Uzumaki Naruto and Kyuubi no Kitsune
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer/Notes/Whatever: I requested this slot some time ago, but though I played with some of the concepts a bit, I hadn't gotten around to finishing the piece till lately.

1) When Naruto was a baby, his ‘caretakers’ treated him ( Read more... )

uzumaki naruto, kyuubi

Comments 9

ambientlight June 21 2006, 11:05:19 UTC

i thought this was a great piece; thanks for sharing! ^_^ one of my favourite lines is in #2 - eyes red like dying suns - and i especially like the idea of naruto imprinting on kyuubi and kyuubi seeing him as a kitsune-cub. #10 is a surprising but plausible way of explaining naruto's penchant for orange clothes, and #11 and #12 are just the right shade of creepy. and of course the ending is powerful in its simplicity, and so very like kyuubi.

wingsover June 21 2006, 13:10:50 UTC

Thanks for the comment! Yeah, basically I requested the Kyuubi/Naruto slot so I could write about Naruto imagining he was kitsune. And honestly I wondered if the orange clothes were like the whisker-marks, closed-eyes, and pranking - remnants of the Kyuubi's influence.

Very Good chrismakkuh June 21 2006, 16:52:57 UTC

Could use minor edits... willing to do them for you, if you'd like...

But I very much enjoyed this. Gives a very interesting spin to Naruto's childhood that I hope is eventually explored with in the manga. I can't imagine any one under the age 0f 8 taking care of themselves with out adult supervision/guidance.

Re: Very Good wingsover June 21 2006, 19:04:33 UTC

Thanks, I'm glad you like. What parts did you think needed to be edited? I dashed this off, so I'm sure there's a grammatical error here and there. ^^;;

Re: Very Good chrismakkuh June 21 2006, 20:11:05 UTC

I did the edits that seemed kinda iffy. If you'd like, I can email them to you.

They really aren't that bad. Took me about ten minutes to do.

Re: Very Good wingsover June 22 2006, 07:45:16 UTC

No prob. I'm not so good at checking email, if they're not too much couldja post them instead?

(The comment has been removed)

wingsover June 22 2006, 14:51:48 UTC

OOOH, Icon LUB. ♥

blackalchemist October 20 2007, 22:59:42 UTC

Wow. That is really. really good. And it's all just the right shade of creepy. I love the way you've done this, particulary numbers 10,11,12,19 and 20.

anat_astarte December 18 2009, 21:34:41 UTC

Wow, I really loved this!! :DD