mlyn
in
13_warrior
Gods and Monsters, Part 3
Gods and Monsters, Part 3
Rated PG-13
Notes: Part 1, Part 2
Archive: my LJ and 13_warrior
Ahmed awoke again with his entire body aching. He coughed up some sea water and realized the ocean no longer cradled him, that instead there was hard, uncomfortable ground beneath him. Opening his eyes to slits, he looked blearily up at some oddly colored trees. Belatedly he realized that they were heads, people bending over him. He closed his eyes.
"Shh. Safe now."
A warm fur was tucked up around his chin and shoulders. Ahmed realized he had been whimpering, and opened his eyes. His head and chest throbbed with pain, and even the low light hurt his eyes. The face of a white-haired woman moved into his line of sight.
"You have broken some bones, but you are safe now. How did you wash up on our shore?"
He had not the strength to tell her any of it.
The next day he was awake enough to get a better sense of his surroundings, and be examined more thoroughly.
The lodge he was in was smaller than the one ruled by King Hrothgar. It smelled rank, though the stink was offset by the brightly burning fire in the center of the building. On closer examination, the lodge smelled like sickness. He hoped this settlement wasn't gripped by plague, or he might never get out alive.
But everyone around him seemed healthy, if tired and underfed. Winter was coming and they were probably working themselves to the bone, trying to build up enough stores to survive.
He lay on a straw mattress with a cloth over it, presumably so the bedding could be changed periodically. He realized he was wearing simple garments, the cloth thin and scratchy. Their loose fit made him more aware of the trickling wetness tickling his buttocks.
He heard a medicine man called for, while two men about his age came to the bed and helped him up. They sat him in a chair while his bed was freshened. Sitting upright was nearly unbearable, but he bit his cheek until his bed was ready. The white-haired woman, Elgra by name, chattered at him while she worked on cooking food for the lodge's inhabitants.
While Ahmed was returned to the bed, a servant girl balled the bed cloth in her arms and went to Elgra. Ahmed saw her pull up a section of the fabric and show Elgra something. He remembered the feel of trickling and covered his face with a hand.
The medicine man, Granath, came to him. He looked to be older than Herger, and wore a stained green tunic over hide leggings. He pulled down the furs cover Ahmed to his chin and gently touched his torso through the thin tunic, asking him questions about what had happened. Ahmed only said he fell off a ship and was then washed ashore.
Granath determined that Elgra was wrong about the broken bones; Ahmed only had three ribs on his right side that had cracked when the wave had tossed him into the rocks. There was also a bump on his head. Lack of food and water had exacerbated his condition. With a few days' rest, he would be able to continue on with his journey, Granath said. Ahmed didn't say anything about his other injury.
While Ahmed ate a stew with greens and rabbit, Elgra and Granath talked. Granath came back to Ahmed as he finished his meal.
"The girl says you are bleeding. This is true?"
Ahmed adjusted the fur over his chest and averted his eyes, but nodded. "An argument, with the men on the ship. They insulted my friend."
"An argument does not cause bleeding."
"I lost my temper and insulted them in return. I called one a milk cow."
"Ah." Granath sat back, looking both satisfied and sympathetic. Ahmed saw by his expression that Granath now knew where the blood had come from. "You called him an animal that bears offspring, a female animal. Not a good thing to say."
"I understand." Ahmed raised a hand to his forehead, rubbing with his fingertips as if to draw out memories. "What does...argr? What does that mean?"
The man looked like he'd smelled something bad. "It describes...a man who enjoys other men."
After the rape and remembering what he'd seen of Buliwyf and Herger alone in the forest, Ahmed had suspected what the words had meant. He nodded, lowering his gaze. He felt angry all over again on Herger's behalf, hating the way that sailor had talked about him. Whose business was it what Herger did in his bed, when he had fought so bravely and saved so many lives? Who were any of them to judge?
"Do you..."
Ahmed looked up, alarmed at the question. "No!" He watched relief flood Granath's face. He fumbled for something else to say, but Granath spoke first.
"What you said was enough for the man to give you a klámhogg. You insulted his masculinity; he dealt you an acceptable punishment."
While Ahmed considered that, relieved that his friendship with Herger had nothing to do with it, Granath stood. "I should look at this wound, to see if you will heal. This kind of wound is dangerous. It could kill you if not treated."
Ahmed's mind reeled with surprise and shame. He nodded, speechless. With Granath's help he turned onto his uninjured side and let the furs be pulled down, and the loose pants too. The examination went on for a long time, and when it was done Granath said Ahmed would not be able to travel alone. However, they didn't have the resources to care for an extra person through the winter.
Herger was sent for.
The progress of the trading vessel had been slow enough that it would not take long for Herger to be reached; probably two days each way. For the two nights after Herger was sent for, they were all on edge while Ahmed ran a fever, but it broke on the third day.
The messenger and Herger arrived with a deer carcass and a hefty bag of grain, enough to thank the lodge for taking care of Ahmed and offset the burden on their food stores. While the womenfolk hurried around the lodge to ready the deer for drying, Herger warmed his hands with a hot drink and talked with Ahmed.
He looked different than when Ahmed had last seen him. It seemed like ages had passed, but in truth it was only a few days. Herger had taken his new boiled leather armor and sewn bronze scales onto it, and his mail had been cleaned since the last battle. His skin glowed from working in the sunlight. The rest of his costume was the same; leather pants and boots, rough shirt and tunic, leather gauntlets, sword and arrows and mead horn. It was all such a welcome sight that Ahmed felt an urge to embrace Herger.
Herger did not want to talk about himself, of course. He questioned Ahmed endlessly about what had happened to him. Ahmed had no choice but to tell Herger why Granath had wanted him to stay bed-bound. He averted his face while he said it.
"I got into an argument with one of the sailors. I lost my temper, insulted him. And he--" He blew out a breath. Herger watched him with heavy anticipation. "He forced himself. On me."
Herger said something on a rush of breath. Ahmed didn't understand it, but it sounded like cursing. Herger took a gulp of tea, then reached out and grabbed one of Ahmed's hands. Ahmed jerked in surprise at the touch, and his ribs complained.
"He will pay for his insult."
"As I paid for mine?"
Herger stared at him.
Ahmed gestured in Granath's direction. "The medicine man says that it happened because of what I said. How long will this cycle of violence and retribution go on?"
His eyes stung, and he had to catch his breath, an effort that caused severe pain in his chest. "I just want to go home." He knew he sounded like a petulant child, but the despair and shame was overwhelming.
Herger tightened the grip on his hand. "I will take you there, my brother."
Two days later Ahmed was judged well enough to leave, and another trading vessel had stopped the night before. After Herger talked with the traders and gained permission for them to travel along, Ahmed gingerly boarded the boat and immediately stowed himself away. What remained of his clothing had been returned to him, as well as boots from one of the men who had died from the sickness. Luckily, his belt with his dagger and purse had not been lost in the water. Without both, he would not get very far on his journey.
With Granath's and Elgra's blessings on them both, they started off again at daybreak.
The passage along the shore of the Baltic Sea was slow-going while the trader continued to pick up goods. Each night they camped onshore as well. The first night Ahmed didn't even leave the ship; he slept until just before dawn. The second night Herger helped him disembark, then offered him some food and a cup of mead, which Ahmed took without a word.
As he woke up, eventually his energy returned, and he and Herger started up a conversation among themselves, the other sailors ignoring them. Ahmed began asking about the language the sailor had used in their argument. Herger became angry again at what had happened, but explained it all.
As Granath had said, argr was a description word for a male who passively gave himself to other men, while seiðskratti referred to male prostitutes who preferred to be used by men. After he'd finished explaining, Herger looked intently at him.
"You do not seem surprised by them calling me these things."
Ahmed shrugged uneasily and prodded the fire with a stray fallen branch. "I gathered their meaning after what they did."
Herger shook his head, braids swinging. "I do not believe that is it. What are you holding back, Little Brother?"
Ahmed was a good man, not a liar or a coward. He stopped avoiding the question and answered it.
"I saw you, with Buliwyf, in the forest. Before the second battle."
Of course Herger knew immediately what he meant.
He straightened stiffly, his face going blank. He blinked and looked away, staring into the fire. He didn't say anything.
After several minutes, Herger got up without looking at him and went over to the group of camp girls hanging around the sailors' fire. While Ahmed watched, Herger wrapped his arm around one girl's waist and brought her roughly against him, grinding his pelvis against hers and kissing her in a sexual display.
The sailors took notice and howled their approval. They cheered him on as he led the girl deeper into the woods, pulling up the hem of her dress.
Ahmed lowered his head and drew a borrowed blanket closer around his shoulders. He stood with some effort and made his way back to the ship to sleep.
Ahmed jerked awake in the morning, a movement that made his ribs complain heartily. Sunlight was streaming gently through the trees, threading through the fog over the water and casting rays above the ship. He lay on his bedroll for several minutes, watching the unspeakable beauty, until the sun rose too high and the effect was gone. It was time to face the day.
He shivered in the cool air and rose, trudging stiffly to the rail to relieve himself over the side. While he was refastening his trousers he saw Herger and the sailors emerging from the forest, packed and ready to leave. Ahmed said nothing to Herger, and no one said anything to him. He didn't try to apologize to Herger. It was too soon.
But after two days Ahmed had finally had enough of Herger's grumpy silence. That night he stood and reached over the fire, yanking a leg of rabbit out of Herger's grasp while the Northman was trying to take a bite. Herger stood angrily, putting them nose to nose.
Ahmed started speaking in Latin, wishing for privacy from the keen ears of the sailors. "I apologize for watching you. Now will you stop this childish pouting and speak to me again?"
"Childish?" Herger spoke angrily enough that Ahmed felt some spittle land on his cheek. "You betrayed my trust and my privacy. Why should I continue to give you my friendship?"
"Then leave! Do not feel obligated to travel with me when you despise my presence! I have apologized to you, but if you will not accept it, then I will continue on my own."
Herger fisted a hand in Ahmed's tunic, yanking him still closer. Their foreheads pressed firmly together. One blue eye blazed into Ahmed's gaze. "I will not have you die because of me, stupid Arab."
Ahmed struggled to pull out of Herger's grip, surprised at his strength. "You have a strange idea of duty!"
Herger took back the leg of rabbit with a jerky motion, then bit a mouthful of meat off the bone. He chewed and swallowed, still watching Ahmed steadily. Then, to his surprise, he burst into a wide grin and laughed.
"Damn you. I cannot stay angry when you look so lost, like a horse without his master."
Ahmed was even more confused by that statement than he was by the sudden shift in mood. He reacted stiffly when Herger wrapped an arm around his shoulder and embraced him.
"But do something like that to me again, and I will cut off your balls. You understand?"
Herger spoke so casually, it took Ahmed a moment to realize he was serious. He knew Herger could deliver on the threat, and nodded.
Herger let him go and sat down, going back to his food. Ahmed took his seat more slowly and hardly ate any more. He was consumed by his thoughts.
At the simplest touch, he could not help but immediately think of the way Herger had called for him in passion, so many nights previous.
Part 4
Rated PG-13
Notes: Part 1, Part 2
Archive: my LJ and 13_warrior
Ahmed awoke again with his entire body aching. He coughed up some sea water and realized the ocean no longer cradled him, that instead there was hard, uncomfortable ground beneath him. Opening his eyes to slits, he looked blearily up at some oddly colored trees. Belatedly he realized that they were heads, people bending over him. He closed his eyes.
"Shh. Safe now."
A warm fur was tucked up around his chin and shoulders. Ahmed realized he had been whimpering, and opened his eyes. His head and chest throbbed with pain, and even the low light hurt his eyes. The face of a white-haired woman moved into his line of sight.
"You have broken some bones, but you are safe now. How did you wash up on our shore?"
He had not the strength to tell her any of it.
The next day he was awake enough to get a better sense of his surroundings, and be examined more thoroughly.
The lodge he was in was smaller than the one ruled by King Hrothgar. It smelled rank, though the stink was offset by the brightly burning fire in the center of the building. On closer examination, the lodge smelled like sickness. He hoped this settlement wasn't gripped by plague, or he might never get out alive.
But everyone around him seemed healthy, if tired and underfed. Winter was coming and they were probably working themselves to the bone, trying to build up enough stores to survive.
He lay on a straw mattress with a cloth over it, presumably so the bedding could be changed periodically. He realized he was wearing simple garments, the cloth thin and scratchy. Their loose fit made him more aware of the trickling wetness tickling his buttocks.
He heard a medicine man called for, while two men about his age came to the bed and helped him up. They sat him in a chair while his bed was freshened. Sitting upright was nearly unbearable, but he bit his cheek until his bed was ready. The white-haired woman, Elgra by name, chattered at him while she worked on cooking food for the lodge's inhabitants.
While Ahmed was returned to the bed, a servant girl balled the bed cloth in her arms and went to Elgra. Ahmed saw her pull up a section of the fabric and show Elgra something. He remembered the feel of trickling and covered his face with a hand.
The medicine man, Granath, came to him. He looked to be older than Herger, and wore a stained green tunic over hide leggings. He pulled down the furs cover Ahmed to his chin and gently touched his torso through the thin tunic, asking him questions about what had happened. Ahmed only said he fell off a ship and was then washed ashore.
Granath determined that Elgra was wrong about the broken bones; Ahmed only had three ribs on his right side that had cracked when the wave had tossed him into the rocks. There was also a bump on his head. Lack of food and water had exacerbated his condition. With a few days' rest, he would be able to continue on with his journey, Granath said. Ahmed didn't say anything about his other injury.
While Ahmed ate a stew with greens and rabbit, Elgra and Granath talked. Granath came back to Ahmed as he finished his meal.
"The girl says you are bleeding. This is true?"
Ahmed adjusted the fur over his chest and averted his eyes, but nodded. "An argument, with the men on the ship. They insulted my friend."
"An argument does not cause bleeding."
"I lost my temper and insulted them in return. I called one a milk cow."
"Ah." Granath sat back, looking both satisfied and sympathetic. Ahmed saw by his expression that Granath now knew where the blood had come from. "You called him an animal that bears offspring, a female animal. Not a good thing to say."
"I understand." Ahmed raised a hand to his forehead, rubbing with his fingertips as if to draw out memories. "What does...argr? What does that mean?"
The man looked like he'd smelled something bad. "It describes...a man who enjoys other men."
After the rape and remembering what he'd seen of Buliwyf and Herger alone in the forest, Ahmed had suspected what the words had meant. He nodded, lowering his gaze. He felt angry all over again on Herger's behalf, hating the way that sailor had talked about him. Whose business was it what Herger did in his bed, when he had fought so bravely and saved so many lives? Who were any of them to judge?
"Do you..."
Ahmed looked up, alarmed at the question. "No!" He watched relief flood Granath's face. He fumbled for something else to say, but Granath spoke first.
"What you said was enough for the man to give you a klámhogg. You insulted his masculinity; he dealt you an acceptable punishment."
While Ahmed considered that, relieved that his friendship with Herger had nothing to do with it, Granath stood. "I should look at this wound, to see if you will heal. This kind of wound is dangerous. It could kill you if not treated."
Ahmed's mind reeled with surprise and shame. He nodded, speechless. With Granath's help he turned onto his uninjured side and let the furs be pulled down, and the loose pants too. The examination went on for a long time, and when it was done Granath said Ahmed would not be able to travel alone. However, they didn't have the resources to care for an extra person through the winter.
Herger was sent for.
The progress of the trading vessel had been slow enough that it would not take long for Herger to be reached; probably two days each way. For the two nights after Herger was sent for, they were all on edge while Ahmed ran a fever, but it broke on the third day.
The messenger and Herger arrived with a deer carcass and a hefty bag of grain, enough to thank the lodge for taking care of Ahmed and offset the burden on their food stores. While the womenfolk hurried around the lodge to ready the deer for drying, Herger warmed his hands with a hot drink and talked with Ahmed.
He looked different than when Ahmed had last seen him. It seemed like ages had passed, but in truth it was only a few days. Herger had taken his new boiled leather armor and sewn bronze scales onto it, and his mail had been cleaned since the last battle. His skin glowed from working in the sunlight. The rest of his costume was the same; leather pants and boots, rough shirt and tunic, leather gauntlets, sword and arrows and mead horn. It was all such a welcome sight that Ahmed felt an urge to embrace Herger.
Herger did not want to talk about himself, of course. He questioned Ahmed endlessly about what had happened to him. Ahmed had no choice but to tell Herger why Granath had wanted him to stay bed-bound. He averted his face while he said it.
"I got into an argument with one of the sailors. I lost my temper, insulted him. And he--" He blew out a breath. Herger watched him with heavy anticipation. "He forced himself. On me."
Herger said something on a rush of breath. Ahmed didn't understand it, but it sounded like cursing. Herger took a gulp of tea, then reached out and grabbed one of Ahmed's hands. Ahmed jerked in surprise at the touch, and his ribs complained.
"He will pay for his insult."
"As I paid for mine?"
Herger stared at him.
Ahmed gestured in Granath's direction. "The medicine man says that it happened because of what I said. How long will this cycle of violence and retribution go on?"
His eyes stung, and he had to catch his breath, an effort that caused severe pain in his chest. "I just want to go home." He knew he sounded like a petulant child, but the despair and shame was overwhelming.
Herger tightened the grip on his hand. "I will take you there, my brother."
Two days later Ahmed was judged well enough to leave, and another trading vessel had stopped the night before. After Herger talked with the traders and gained permission for them to travel along, Ahmed gingerly boarded the boat and immediately stowed himself away. What remained of his clothing had been returned to him, as well as boots from one of the men who had died from the sickness. Luckily, his belt with his dagger and purse had not been lost in the water. Without both, he would not get very far on his journey.
With Granath's and Elgra's blessings on them both, they started off again at daybreak.
The passage along the shore of the Baltic Sea was slow-going while the trader continued to pick up goods. Each night they camped onshore as well. The first night Ahmed didn't even leave the ship; he slept until just before dawn. The second night Herger helped him disembark, then offered him some food and a cup of mead, which Ahmed took without a word.
As he woke up, eventually his energy returned, and he and Herger started up a conversation among themselves, the other sailors ignoring them. Ahmed began asking about the language the sailor had used in their argument. Herger became angry again at what had happened, but explained it all.
As Granath had said, argr was a description word for a male who passively gave himself to other men, while seiðskratti referred to male prostitutes who preferred to be used by men. After he'd finished explaining, Herger looked intently at him.
"You do not seem surprised by them calling me these things."
Ahmed shrugged uneasily and prodded the fire with a stray fallen branch. "I gathered their meaning after what they did."
Herger shook his head, braids swinging. "I do not believe that is it. What are you holding back, Little Brother?"
Ahmed was a good man, not a liar or a coward. He stopped avoiding the question and answered it.
"I saw you, with Buliwyf, in the forest. Before the second battle."
Of course Herger knew immediately what he meant.
He straightened stiffly, his face going blank. He blinked and looked away, staring into the fire. He didn't say anything.
After several minutes, Herger got up without looking at him and went over to the group of camp girls hanging around the sailors' fire. While Ahmed watched, Herger wrapped his arm around one girl's waist and brought her roughly against him, grinding his pelvis against hers and kissing her in a sexual display.
The sailors took notice and howled their approval. They cheered him on as he led the girl deeper into the woods, pulling up the hem of her dress.
Ahmed lowered his head and drew a borrowed blanket closer around his shoulders. He stood with some effort and made his way back to the ship to sleep.
Ahmed jerked awake in the morning, a movement that made his ribs complain heartily. Sunlight was streaming gently through the trees, threading through the fog over the water and casting rays above the ship. He lay on his bedroll for several minutes, watching the unspeakable beauty, until the sun rose too high and the effect was gone. It was time to face the day.
He shivered in the cool air and rose, trudging stiffly to the rail to relieve himself over the side. While he was refastening his trousers he saw Herger and the sailors emerging from the forest, packed and ready to leave. Ahmed said nothing to Herger, and no one said anything to him. He didn't try to apologize to Herger. It was too soon.
But after two days Ahmed had finally had enough of Herger's grumpy silence. That night he stood and reached over the fire, yanking a leg of rabbit out of Herger's grasp while the Northman was trying to take a bite. Herger stood angrily, putting them nose to nose.
Ahmed started speaking in Latin, wishing for privacy from the keen ears of the sailors. "I apologize for watching you. Now will you stop this childish pouting and speak to me again?"
"Childish?" Herger spoke angrily enough that Ahmed felt some spittle land on his cheek. "You betrayed my trust and my privacy. Why should I continue to give you my friendship?"
"Then leave! Do not feel obligated to travel with me when you despise my presence! I have apologized to you, but if you will not accept it, then I will continue on my own."
Herger fisted a hand in Ahmed's tunic, yanking him still closer. Their foreheads pressed firmly together. One blue eye blazed into Ahmed's gaze. "I will not have you die because of me, stupid Arab."
Ahmed struggled to pull out of Herger's grip, surprised at his strength. "You have a strange idea of duty!"
Herger took back the leg of rabbit with a jerky motion, then bit a mouthful of meat off the bone. He chewed and swallowed, still watching Ahmed steadily. Then, to his surprise, he burst into a wide grin and laughed.
"Damn you. I cannot stay angry when you look so lost, like a horse without his master."
Ahmed was even more confused by that statement than he was by the sudden shift in mood. He reacted stiffly when Herger wrapped an arm around his shoulder and embraced him.
"But do something like that to me again, and I will cut off your balls. You understand?"
Herger spoke so casually, it took Ahmed a moment to realize he was serious. He knew Herger could deliver on the threat, and nodded.
Herger let him go and sat down, going back to his food. Ahmed took his seat more slowly and hardly ate any more. He was consumed by his thoughts.
At the simplest touch, he could not help but immediately think of the way Herger had called for him in passion, so many nights previous.
Part 4