Ice of Oblivion Chapter 16
Title: Ice of Oblivion Chapter 16/24
Author: zoomzoomzoomzoo
Fandom/Genre: SPN AU Romance, Drama, Action
Pairing (s): Dean/Castiel
Rating: T
Word Count: ~82,000
Warnings: Underage, Mild Sexual Situation, Violence
Summary: AU. In a time of great tragedy in the lands of Mamot, the human race and the angel race are forced to form an unbreakable union that will bind them together for twenty seven lifetimes in order to stop the uprising of the demon race. In bargain they offer Castiel, one of the most powerful angels in the entire world to marry Dean Winchester, the young crown prince of the human world. The typically detached Castiel winds up falling in love with the Prince. The only problem is his brothers don’t expect Dean to live through the war. Will Castiel stay and support the man he loves despite the heartbreak that might accompany his passing or will he fall back in line with his brothers, becoming numb to all human emotions once more?
Chapter 16
Castiel spent that night in Dean’s tent. After handing him over to Trent, Dean was worked on for hours before Trent concluded that the stab wound to Dean’s stomach may not have been fatal but because they were outside it needed to close immediately. That’s when they decided that they would put Dean in the tent until he was awake enough to consent to a procedure as dangerous as forcible closing. Until then, Castiel decided that he wanted to be the one to watch over Dean.
He never truly noticed how low a tent could be until that night; he never had to spend a night in one. He was used to the high ceilings of Himmel’s castle and the endlessness of his father’s sky. Being in closed spaces made him nervous, one time while visiting a small town on the outskirts of Inim he was forced to go into a hut that was exactly his size and had a minor panic attack before racing out of there feeling queasy.
Raphael, who was with him during that particular incident, reminded him of it as soon as he proclaimed he was going to watch over the currently ailing Dean Winchester. At the time he didn’t really care or remember the incident but after a couple of minutes of having to sit in one place and one bone ratting incident where the top of his head brushed the top of the tent Castiel was suddenly reminded of his problems.
To distract himself from his irrational fears, Castiel decided to get rid of his other fears and finish Dean’s letters. There weren’t many left to go, probably two or three, either way though, Castiel figured he needed to read them now. Dean was there now; within Castiel’s reach and his for the taking. If he ever wanted to move forward he knew he was going to have to go backwards again, if only for a little while.
Castiel could sense Dean’s growth in his letters; the last one’s all being when he was well into his twenty’s. When Castiel got to the last letter he was a little excited but apprehensive as well. He wanted to end the chronicles of ‘Dean Winchester’s years without his best friend’ but at the same time, he didn’t want to read the letter that ended the chain. The one that stopped Dean from writing to him for two years:
Dear Cas,
This is me again - Dean. I’m just writing to tell you that I won’t be writing to you anymore. I realized that there’s no point, you obviously don’t care about me anymore. We’re not friends anymore, hell we probably never were.
I’m older now; almost twenty one and I don’t have time for all of this childish bullshit. You could have at least told me that I was wasting my time eight years ago when you decided we didn’t mean anything to each other anymore. I think I deserve at least that, but of course not. Nope, you’re too high and fucking mighty for that; you’d rather show all of your angel friends up on Crystal Mountain my letters and laugh at me.
Or, you never opened them. You saw who it was from and you didn’t even bother cracking one of them open to see how you’re favorite human was doing. If that’s the case, you probably won’t open this one either and I don’t blame you. It did get pathetic after the first year or so…
I feel this humongous weight lifting off of my shoulders every time I think about letting you go. I just want to relieve myself, if I get rid of you I’ll never have to worry about this weight again.
Have a nice life Cas. You’ll live yours far longer than mine.
Love,
Dean
The unfamiliar tingling sensation overcame all of Castiel’s senses when he placed the letter down in his lap. It was only two years ago when he became a memory and only two years ago that Dean moved on. He never felt worse about himself and his decision as he did at that moment.
His previous assertion that he was going to meet up with Dean for a second time and woo him effortlessly to the point where they could be married again flew out of his mind and was replaced by a crippling feeling of hopelessness. He really hurt Dean, he didn’t think about it at the time but the very thought of waiting around for something you cared deeply for only for them to not come is unbearable.
Why hadn’t he thought about it?
Was he just too selfish? Castiel never was selfish; he was the compassionate one who helped humans and sympathized with them. He wasn’t the one who stomped on their feelings to save himself from feeling the same only much stronger.
There was a gentle ruffle of the tents opening that shocked Castiel out of his thoughts. It was Luke, the only person other than Sam and John who cared about Dean as much as Castiel did. The man was holding a long shotgun that he cleaned with a small rag. He sent Castiel a short smile and then, stepping over Dean’s body, he took a seat beside him.
“How’s he doing?”
Castiel felt Dean’s life energy much stronger than when he was stabbed and it continued to grow. “He’s recovering,” Castiel said, nodding.
Luke breathed out a long sigh and leaned back as much as he could without tipping the tent over. “That’s a relief,” Luke said almost as if the weight of the world was lifted off of his shoulders. “Good thing you were here. God, if you weren’t he would probably be dead right now.”
Castiel shook his head but didn’t speak. He doubted it; Dean held on for ten years without him, another two days wouldn’t have made a difference. Dean would’ve made it as long as he could have, with or without Castiel. He turned to face Luke and glowered at what he saw.
He looked completely concentrated on one of the scars over Dean’s forehead; it was a long and isolated gash that completely took away from Dean’s features and drew attention to itself. It was fresh and still had beads of blood sticking out of it but for the most part there was almost no blood. But, that was not what surprised him; it was expression of guilt that crossed Luke’s skin and made him look haggard.
Castiel still wasn’t good at offering comfort to humans; he always tried with Dean when he was younger but the boy rarely got comfort from Castiel himself. In fact, he used to get sadder. But, Castiel could not just allow Luke to look that way.
“It wasn’t your fault Luke.”
Luke looked taken aback but he still frowned and turned away. “Like hell it wasn’t… I’m the worst body guard ever.”
Castiel shook his head and regarded Luke with sad eyes. “No, that’s not true. You can’t be in all places at once. There was a full scale attack on your home.”
Luke chuckled lightly. “Dean was in all places at once, I should have followed him.”
“No,” Castiel said with a shake of his head. “We both know that if you had been with him when he was captured than you’d be dead.”
Luke tensed before nodding. “Still, I’m only here to live for the crown and die for the crown…” Luke murmured more to himself than to Castiel. He placed his head in his hands and leaned back some more. “This sucks, your boyfriend is too fucking rash.”
Castiel gasped and scowled at Luke at the reference of Dean as his boyfriend. He felt his face heating so he quickly turned away from Luke to hide his shame; the very mention of him and Dean actually going steady filled him with so many strange emotions. He could only hope that that was what the future had in store for them.
Luke seemed to notice Castiel’s embarrassment and - so much like Dean - broke out into laughter in a complete 180˚ of his previous behavior. He covered his face with his hands and continued to laugh, though it was muffled at that point.
The angel’s eyes widened and he clutched his chest. Would Dean react the same way when Castiel asked him to be his “boyfriend”? Would he laugh in Castiel’s face? Would he mock him like he’d just asked him something trivial like how many grams of sugar are inside of a large cupcake?
“Thanks Cas, you really helped me put everything in perspective,” Luke said in between bouts of laughter. “Because, you know, it was Dean’s fault that I had to leave him anyways…”
Castiel pouted and despite the coloring that he just knew was still on his cheeks, he turned around looked at Luke, puzzled.
“He told me to go to the Medical Quarters of the castle to protect his… his honey.”
Luke left the room clutching his sides and chuckling, his gun forgotten at Dean’s bedside.
Castiel felt an involuntary shiver go up his spine. Has Dean found someone else? It only made sense, he was a twenty three year old man and he was the soon-to-be King. It was necessary for Dean to become acquainted with other people. He needed to establish bonds and, if he chooses a female, produce heirs. And Castiel had not contacted John Winchester about anything concerning his engagement to his son since the deal was struck. Maybe he was letting Dean make his own decisions now. …
Castiel looked at his fallen betrothed and frowned. How did he let things get so messed up?
Next
Author: zoomzoomzoomzoo
Fandom/Genre: SPN AU Romance, Drama, Action
Pairing (s): Dean/Castiel
Rating: T
Word Count: ~82,000
Warnings: Underage, Mild Sexual Situation, Violence
Summary: AU. In a time of great tragedy in the lands of Mamot, the human race and the angel race are forced to form an unbreakable union that will bind them together for twenty seven lifetimes in order to stop the uprising of the demon race. In bargain they offer Castiel, one of the most powerful angels in the entire world to marry Dean Winchester, the young crown prince of the human world. The typically detached Castiel winds up falling in love with the Prince. The only problem is his brothers don’t expect Dean to live through the war. Will Castiel stay and support the man he loves despite the heartbreak that might accompany his passing or will he fall back in line with his brothers, becoming numb to all human emotions once more?
Chapter 16
Castiel spent that night in Dean’s tent. After handing him over to Trent, Dean was worked on for hours before Trent concluded that the stab wound to Dean’s stomach may not have been fatal but because they were outside it needed to close immediately. That’s when they decided that they would put Dean in the tent until he was awake enough to consent to a procedure as dangerous as forcible closing. Until then, Castiel decided that he wanted to be the one to watch over Dean.
He never truly noticed how low a tent could be until that night; he never had to spend a night in one. He was used to the high ceilings of Himmel’s castle and the endlessness of his father’s sky. Being in closed spaces made him nervous, one time while visiting a small town on the outskirts of Inim he was forced to go into a hut that was exactly his size and had a minor panic attack before racing out of there feeling queasy.
Raphael, who was with him during that particular incident, reminded him of it as soon as he proclaimed he was going to watch over the currently ailing Dean Winchester. At the time he didn’t really care or remember the incident but after a couple of minutes of having to sit in one place and one bone ratting incident where the top of his head brushed the top of the tent Castiel was suddenly reminded of his problems.
To distract himself from his irrational fears, Castiel decided to get rid of his other fears and finish Dean’s letters. There weren’t many left to go, probably two or three, either way though, Castiel figured he needed to read them now. Dean was there now; within Castiel’s reach and his for the taking. If he ever wanted to move forward he knew he was going to have to go backwards again, if only for a little while.
Castiel could sense Dean’s growth in his letters; the last one’s all being when he was well into his twenty’s. When Castiel got to the last letter he was a little excited but apprehensive as well. He wanted to end the chronicles of ‘Dean Winchester’s years without his best friend’ but at the same time, he didn’t want to read the letter that ended the chain. The one that stopped Dean from writing to him for two years:
Dear Cas,
This is me again - Dean. I’m just writing to tell you that I won’t be writing to you anymore. I realized that there’s no point, you obviously don’t care about me anymore. We’re not friends anymore, hell we probably never were.
I’m older now; almost twenty one and I don’t have time for all of this childish bullshit. You could have at least told me that I was wasting my time eight years ago when you decided we didn’t mean anything to each other anymore. I think I deserve at least that, but of course not. Nope, you’re too high and fucking mighty for that; you’d rather show all of your angel friends up on Crystal Mountain my letters and laugh at me.
Or, you never opened them. You saw who it was from and you didn’t even bother cracking one of them open to see how you’re favorite human was doing. If that’s the case, you probably won’t open this one either and I don’t blame you. It did get pathetic after the first year or so…
I feel this humongous weight lifting off of my shoulders every time I think about letting you go. I just want to relieve myself, if I get rid of you I’ll never have to worry about this weight again.
Have a nice life Cas. You’ll live yours far longer than mine.
Love,
Dean
The unfamiliar tingling sensation overcame all of Castiel’s senses when he placed the letter down in his lap. It was only two years ago when he became a memory and only two years ago that Dean moved on. He never felt worse about himself and his decision as he did at that moment.
His previous assertion that he was going to meet up with Dean for a second time and woo him effortlessly to the point where they could be married again flew out of his mind and was replaced by a crippling feeling of hopelessness. He really hurt Dean, he didn’t think about it at the time but the very thought of waiting around for something you cared deeply for only for them to not come is unbearable.
Why hadn’t he thought about it?
Was he just too selfish? Castiel never was selfish; he was the compassionate one who helped humans and sympathized with them. He wasn’t the one who stomped on their feelings to save himself from feeling the same only much stronger.
There was a gentle ruffle of the tents opening that shocked Castiel out of his thoughts. It was Luke, the only person other than Sam and John who cared about Dean as much as Castiel did. The man was holding a long shotgun that he cleaned with a small rag. He sent Castiel a short smile and then, stepping over Dean’s body, he took a seat beside him.
“How’s he doing?”
Castiel felt Dean’s life energy much stronger than when he was stabbed and it continued to grow. “He’s recovering,” Castiel said, nodding.
Luke breathed out a long sigh and leaned back as much as he could without tipping the tent over. “That’s a relief,” Luke said almost as if the weight of the world was lifted off of his shoulders. “Good thing you were here. God, if you weren’t he would probably be dead right now.”
Castiel shook his head but didn’t speak. He doubted it; Dean held on for ten years without him, another two days wouldn’t have made a difference. Dean would’ve made it as long as he could have, with or without Castiel. He turned to face Luke and glowered at what he saw.
He looked completely concentrated on one of the scars over Dean’s forehead; it was a long and isolated gash that completely took away from Dean’s features and drew attention to itself. It was fresh and still had beads of blood sticking out of it but for the most part there was almost no blood. But, that was not what surprised him; it was expression of guilt that crossed Luke’s skin and made him look haggard.
Castiel still wasn’t good at offering comfort to humans; he always tried with Dean when he was younger but the boy rarely got comfort from Castiel himself. In fact, he used to get sadder. But, Castiel could not just allow Luke to look that way.
“It wasn’t your fault Luke.”
Luke looked taken aback but he still frowned and turned away. “Like hell it wasn’t… I’m the worst body guard ever.”
Castiel shook his head and regarded Luke with sad eyes. “No, that’s not true. You can’t be in all places at once. There was a full scale attack on your home.”
Luke chuckled lightly. “Dean was in all places at once, I should have followed him.”
“No,” Castiel said with a shake of his head. “We both know that if you had been with him when he was captured than you’d be dead.”
Luke tensed before nodding. “Still, I’m only here to live for the crown and die for the crown…” Luke murmured more to himself than to Castiel. He placed his head in his hands and leaned back some more. “This sucks, your boyfriend is too fucking rash.”
Castiel gasped and scowled at Luke at the reference of Dean as his boyfriend. He felt his face heating so he quickly turned away from Luke to hide his shame; the very mention of him and Dean actually going steady filled him with so many strange emotions. He could only hope that that was what the future had in store for them.
Luke seemed to notice Castiel’s embarrassment and - so much like Dean - broke out into laughter in a complete 180˚ of his previous behavior. He covered his face with his hands and continued to laugh, though it was muffled at that point.
The angel’s eyes widened and he clutched his chest. Would Dean react the same way when Castiel asked him to be his “boyfriend”? Would he laugh in Castiel’s face? Would he mock him like he’d just asked him something trivial like how many grams of sugar are inside of a large cupcake?
“Thanks Cas, you really helped me put everything in perspective,” Luke said in between bouts of laughter. “Because, you know, it was Dean’s fault that I had to leave him anyways…”
Castiel pouted and despite the coloring that he just knew was still on his cheeks, he turned around looked at Luke, puzzled.
“He told me to go to the Medical Quarters of the castle to protect his… his honey.”
Luke left the room clutching his sides and chuckling, his gun forgotten at Dean’s bedside.
Castiel felt an involuntary shiver go up his spine. Has Dean found someone else? It only made sense, he was a twenty three year old man and he was the soon-to-be King. It was necessary for Dean to become acquainted with other people. He needed to establish bonds and, if he chooses a female, produce heirs. And Castiel had not contacted John Winchester about anything concerning his engagement to his son since the deal was struck. Maybe he was letting Dean make his own decisions now. …
Castiel looked at his fallen betrothed and frowned. How did he let things get so messed up?
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