Untangling
Do you know how difficult it is to untangle a mess of yarn or string? Just when you think you found the solution you have to loop back around and try another way. That's a lot like how my life feels. I'm sure most people are actually no stranger to this phenomenon. Life is cyclical and the cycles always overlap.
However, I think that I'm getting this knot of emotions under control. I keep on happening upon solutions unwittingly. Often what I think are my biggest fuck ups can actually spur some big advances. I'm trying to take the most positive spin on an otherwise difficult time.
I'm getting so tired and worn out and it's hard to constantly be learning and unlearning, doing and undoing. It's life, I know, but I think I need to press the pause button or something. Working 47.5 hours a week, and working out and maintaining social ties, it doesn't leave much time for being quiet. It doesn't help me remember who I am at my core; it just brings me further and further away. Now I have to figure out what to do with this realization. There are things that I can do. I don't have to keep doing this.
In the meantime, I keep untangling these emotions and situations.
However, I think that I'm getting this knot of emotions under control. I keep on happening upon solutions unwittingly. Often what I think are my biggest fuck ups can actually spur some big advances. I'm trying to take the most positive spin on an otherwise difficult time.
I'm getting so tired and worn out and it's hard to constantly be learning and unlearning, doing and undoing. It's life, I know, but I think I need to press the pause button or something. Working 47.5 hours a week, and working out and maintaining social ties, it doesn't leave much time for being quiet. It doesn't help me remember who I am at my core; it just brings me further and further away. Now I have to figure out what to do with this realization. There are things that I can do. I don't have to keep doing this.
In the meantime, I keep untangling these emotions and situations.