Galaxy Quest Challenge fic: Stand-in
Title: Stand-in
Fandom: Galaxy Quest
Words: 734
Summary: For
penknife's TV Tropes Challenge. The prompt was Classically Trained Extra.
Jason convinces Alexander Dane to do a scene. Pure fluff. Gen, with slash and het elements.
Disclaimer: I believe Universal owns Dreamworks, which owns Galaxy Quest. I know it's not me.
Stand-in
“Five curtain calls.”
“I know.”
“Richard III.”
“I know, I know. So this should be a breeze, right?”
The great actor sat at his dressing table, carefully ungluing his head. Jason Nesmith, alleged actor, hovered over him. Alexander muttered, “Why am I doing this?”
“Because - I explained this - when you touched the Narsicca Coil, you and Gwen switched bodies. So, you know, you’re Gwen, until we can get you back to the planet.” Alexander scowled at him in the mirror. “Oh, come on. It's a challenge. You can do it.”
“Of course I can do it. It’s not a question of ability. It’s about motivation. Why would I, why would anyone, ever, in the course of human history, say these lines?”
“Look, it’s a big dramatic scene. You like those, right? She finally tells the Commander how she feels about him, and at first he doesn’t even know it’s her.”
“No, that’s because it’s me, suffering from some sort of mental collapse. `I’ve dreamt of you from the moment I saw your…’ Wait a minute. I remember this scene. This is the one that was cut three weeks ago.”
“Yeah, well, writers. What are you gonna do.”
“Gwen said, if she ever read this speech you’d better be lying in front of an altar, covered in flowers.”
“Well, Gwen has…”
“Standards?”
“Issues. Her and me, you know. It’s complicated.”
“And an alien device which swaps bodies is the simplified version, is it?”
“Look, just pretend you’re madly in love with me.”
“…I need a drink.”
“No, wait, Alexander. Ok, it’s not the best speech, but it’s an important scene. We need it for the show. And anyway, old friend…”
“Oh, what? You have your `I have a cunning plan’ face on. So go on, what is it?”
“Well, you always say a great actor can rise above his material, but if you think you’re not up to it…”
“I’m calling my agent.”
“Alexander, wait, please. I need this scene. We need it. We can work on the dialogue, but, I need the fans to know that someone likes me.”
Alexander raised an eyebrow at this.
“Commander Taggart, I mean. You know, he can be a little, um, pompous and full of himself sometimes.”
“Really?”
“Well, everyone respects him, because he’s the Commander and he’s got the hair, and the ship, and he always saves the day …”
“You’re losing me, here.”
“But he’s so perfect, you know. You could almost, kinda, hate a guy like that.”
“One might imagine.”
“But I figure, if he’s got friends, people who love him, then he must be an OK guy.”
There was a dangerous hint of pleading in the voice. Alexander relented.
“He’s got me. `Dr Lazarus'."
“Yeah, see? Everyone loves your character - brilliant alien scientist guy. So Taggart must be pretty cool, if Lazarus thinks there’s something worthwhile about him.”
“Something. Maybe. On occasion.”
“So that’s why I want this scene to work, to show that it’s not all zombie priestesses and Penthian assassins who die at the end of the episode, but that a real character, someone people like, could actually love this guy. I mean, potentially.”
“So, why me? Other than the fact that Gwen turned you down?”
“I want it to be perfect. Plausible and passionate, and kinda sweet. And I could honestly use your help here. I mean, I can stare down a tennis ball on a stick or wrestle a guy in a rubber suit with the best of them, but something with emotion and words and stuff? Something important? For that, I want to be working with the guy who played Macbeth.
“Richard III.”
“Right. Five curtain calls. So what do you say?”
Alexander sighed. “Was ever woman in this humor wooed?”
“Does that mean `yes’? That’s `yes’, right?”
“For the show.”
“For the show, of course. Thanks, buddy.”
“You know, Jason, if you want me, as a serious actor, to convince people of my love for you, your fans might be a bit alarmed.”
“Not all of `em.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Nevermind. I’ll tell you later. You want to go over it now, while we’re here? We can work on the parts you don’t like.”
“I would like to go home some time this week.”
“Just the scene when we run into the cave. Ok, I fight off the fire rat, and you say…”
“`Look out, Commander. Your uniform’s on fire. You’d better take it…’ oh, God.”
“Come on. It’ll be fun.”
...
(Author's note, or it will continue to bother me:
Gwen is fine with all this. She's looking forward to playing Dr. Lazarus, and she's perfectly happy with her character becoming the star's One True Love as long as she doesn't have to be there when it happens.)
Fandom: Galaxy Quest
Words: 734
Summary: For
penknife's TV Tropes Challenge. The prompt was Classically Trained Extra.
Jason convinces Alexander Dane to do a scene. Pure fluff. Gen, with slash and het elements.
Disclaimer: I believe Universal owns Dreamworks, which owns Galaxy Quest. I know it's not me.
Stand-in
“Five curtain calls.”
“I know.”
“Richard III.”
“I know, I know. So this should be a breeze, right?”
The great actor sat at his dressing table, carefully ungluing his head. Jason Nesmith, alleged actor, hovered over him. Alexander muttered, “Why am I doing this?”
“Because - I explained this - when you touched the Narsicca Coil, you and Gwen switched bodies. So, you know, you’re Gwen, until we can get you back to the planet.” Alexander scowled at him in the mirror. “Oh, come on. It's a challenge. You can do it.”
“Of course I can do it. It’s not a question of ability. It’s about motivation. Why would I, why would anyone, ever, in the course of human history, say these lines?”
“Look, it’s a big dramatic scene. You like those, right? She finally tells the Commander how she feels about him, and at first he doesn’t even know it’s her.”
“No, that’s because it’s me, suffering from some sort of mental collapse. `I’ve dreamt of you from the moment I saw your…’ Wait a minute. I remember this scene. This is the one that was cut three weeks ago.”
“Yeah, well, writers. What are you gonna do.”
“Gwen said, if she ever read this speech you’d better be lying in front of an altar, covered in flowers.”
“Well, Gwen has…”
“Standards?”
“Issues. Her and me, you know. It’s complicated.”
“And an alien device which swaps bodies is the simplified version, is it?”
“Look, just pretend you’re madly in love with me.”
“…I need a drink.”
“No, wait, Alexander. Ok, it’s not the best speech, but it’s an important scene. We need it for the show. And anyway, old friend…”
“Oh, what? You have your `I have a cunning plan’ face on. So go on, what is it?”
“Well, you always say a great actor can rise above his material, but if you think you’re not up to it…”
“I’m calling my agent.”
“Alexander, wait, please. I need this scene. We need it. We can work on the dialogue, but, I need the fans to know that someone likes me.”
Alexander raised an eyebrow at this.
“Commander Taggart, I mean. You know, he can be a little, um, pompous and full of himself sometimes.”
“Really?”
“Well, everyone respects him, because he’s the Commander and he’s got the hair, and the ship, and he always saves the day …”
“You’re losing me, here.”
“But he’s so perfect, you know. You could almost, kinda, hate a guy like that.”
“One might imagine.”
“But I figure, if he’s got friends, people who love him, then he must be an OK guy.”
There was a dangerous hint of pleading in the voice. Alexander relented.
“He’s got me. `Dr Lazarus'."
“Yeah, see? Everyone loves your character - brilliant alien scientist guy. So Taggart must be pretty cool, if Lazarus thinks there’s something worthwhile about him.”
“Something. Maybe. On occasion.”
“So that’s why I want this scene to work, to show that it’s not all zombie priestesses and Penthian assassins who die at the end of the episode, but that a real character, someone people like, could actually love this guy. I mean, potentially.”
“So, why me? Other than the fact that Gwen turned you down?”
“I want it to be perfect. Plausible and passionate, and kinda sweet. And I could honestly use your help here. I mean, I can stare down a tennis ball on a stick or wrestle a guy in a rubber suit with the best of them, but something with emotion and words and stuff? Something important? For that, I want to be working with the guy who played Macbeth.
“Richard III.”
“Right. Five curtain calls. So what do you say?”
Alexander sighed. “Was ever woman in this humor wooed?”
“Does that mean `yes’? That’s `yes’, right?”
“For the show.”
“For the show, of course. Thanks, buddy.”
“You know, Jason, if you want me, as a serious actor, to convince people of my love for you, your fans might be a bit alarmed.”
“Not all of `em.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Nevermind. I’ll tell you later. You want to go over it now, while we’re here? We can work on the parts you don’t like.”
“I would like to go home some time this week.”
“Just the scene when we run into the cave. Ok, I fight off the fire rat, and you say…”
“`Look out, Commander. Your uniform’s on fire. You’d better take it…’ oh, God.”
“Come on. It’ll be fun.”
...
(Author's note, or it will continue to bother me:
Gwen is fine with all this. She's looking forward to playing Dr. Lazarus, and she's perfectly happy with her character becoming the star's One True Love as long as she doesn't have to be there when it happens.)