71F - 52F : Cloudy
oh boy, what happened yesterday? Uh, let's see, first I couldn't sleep. Then I couldn't stay awake, so I wound up going to sleep around 7am and waking up with my alarm at 10am. Then I had my psychiatrist appointment where I told her I was suicidal more days than not. Then instead of asking if I had means and a plan she started trying to convince me to go to the hospital "for a couple days." And then told me I had to convince her not to hospitalize me, instead of asking, as is legal and required "do you have means and a plan?" They wouldn't have kept me, because the people in the hospital would have asked the right questions but then I would have been stuck at the VA without my car. But she did ultimately agree to give me an antidepressant.
I went back to bed and woke again around 3. I read lj and dw, and decided not to go to Rainbow Village because I felt awful. I sat around on the internet until time for dinner, ate and then went to go on my walk with Donna. I figured maybe exercise would make me feel better. It did not. And I was so dizzy at the start of the walk that I was wandering off course into the next lane of people.
I came home and talked to Victor for a few minutes and looked at RN for a little bit. I read from a couple of books, but really felt awful, and finally went to bed around 9pm.