I fucked up
So I guess I fucked it up... I knew it. His texts weren't sweet anymore, his attitude was in "you owe me" mode and in person he was distant. Our first date before the weekend mess he grabbed my hand and kissed me and hugged me openly and after the weekend when I got stupid drunk, he isn't like that anymore. I royally fucked up but he told me it was okay and that people make mistakes but clearly he doesn't believe that himself since his body language practically shoved me a mile away from him.
He used to tell me whoever fucks it up with you is stupid you are damn near perfect. I would come see you every day if you'd let me. Kissing you is amazing every time. He was even going to stay in VA for me when he got out of the Army next month since he said he doesn't necessarily love his home town and actually likes it here in VA..... but I fucked it all up.
What's worse is the fact that he coincidentally lives right next to the last I was seeing and apparently the guy and his friends have a nickname they refer to me as and there are "stories" floating around of me and the last guy.... and yet Andrew still wanted to be with me but now he has fallen in with the rest since i made a mistake and got really wasted on Sat...its not like i liked him less or fucked someone else I just got drunk.... I'm so hurt right now and wish I could go back in time so we'd still be texting eachother like high school crushes....
I'm never gonna find anyone that I want to be with who wants to be with me just as badly. I knew tonight was going to suck I just fucking knew it.
He used to tell me whoever fucks it up with you is stupid you are damn near perfect. I would come see you every day if you'd let me. Kissing you is amazing every time. He was even going to stay in VA for me when he got out of the Army next month since he said he doesn't necessarily love his home town and actually likes it here in VA..... but I fucked it all up.
What's worse is the fact that he coincidentally lives right next to the last I was seeing and apparently the guy and his friends have a nickname they refer to me as and there are "stories" floating around of me and the last guy.... and yet Andrew still wanted to be with me but now he has fallen in with the rest since i made a mistake and got really wasted on Sat...its not like i liked him less or fucked someone else I just got drunk.... I'm so hurt right now and wish I could go back in time so we'd still be texting eachother like high school crushes....
I'm never gonna find anyone that I want to be with who wants to be with me just as badly. I knew tonight was going to suck I just fucking knew it.