When you're smart...

[yummygirl]

people expect you to do things like get advanced degrees. I was watching a Phoenix college commercial, and I hear them say things like "I wanted to be the first in my family to get a degree" or "Going to school taught me that I can do anything if I put my mind to it". But what I want to know is where is my kudos. No one in my family has ever

Comments

[perldiver]

It would be patronizing for me to say "I'm proud..." because I had nothing to do with it. Instead, I'll say:

I'm so impressed with you for getting this far through a Ph.D. program, with every sign saying that you will complete it.

Also, I hear you. I see those same ads you do and it's a cognitive dissonance experience...I grew up with a family and a background where "I will graduate from college" was in the same category as "the sun will rise tomorrow".

My offhand thought (not too carefully considered) is that there are only two real obstacles to graduating from undergraduate college: money (having it, or having the knowledge / assistance to work the financial aid system) and confidence that you can do it. Everything about undergraduate colleges is set up to support you--if (1) you listen to your advisor and don't overreach on your course selection, (2) pay your bills when the bursar tells you, and (3) don't drop out, you will graduate.

My impression, however, is that this stops being true after the undergraduate level. Once you start adding in thesis work, TA-ships, and original research / project work, Masters and Ph.D. students have to seriously work their tails off. So, once again--major kudos to you for your accomplishment.

[yummygirl]

I'm glad you empathize, it does make a difference. It's still damn hard.