[Fanfiction:] Fade into the Background Chapter 13
Banner by naomi0211 ♥
Title: Fade into the Background //You can't lose what you never had//
Pairing: Akanishi Jin X Kamenashi Kazuya (Akame to make it short XD) //KAT-TUN//
Genre: Romance, ANGST, lots of Fluff
Rating: from PG-13 to NC-17
Disclamer: Do not own them. If anybody I'd like to own Ueda. But well... one can't have everything, right?
Summary: Kazuya is getting married and while watching him from the background Jin suddenly remembers their story. His thoughts are going back in time and he starts to regret and realize....
A/N: First of all: English isn't my mother tongue, but I tried my best and since I was living in the UK I'm pretty much used to write and speak it. But you're welcome to correct mistakes.
This is the very last Memory, but that doesn't mean the whole fanfiction is over. We've just reached the last memory beore the wedding. There are chapters to follow after this!
So, well, Kazuya's getting engaged, Jin finds out, but is he able to do something about it? Is there even anything left for him to do?
On another note, I, of course, noticed that exciting and funny rumour of Jin and Tegoshi and well, look around my journal, I AM a Tegoshi fan, but those rumours were NOT the reason why I made Jin suffer like that in this chap. XD *LÖL* I'm not that crazy XDDDDDD
It was simply planned like this. And I promise it'll get better from the next chapter on. Happy End ahead ♥
Announcement: Regarding my friending rules I would like to link you guys to this post. A lot of people I've never heard or read from before friended me lately, and I'm happy about that, but I suppose it's mostly people who read my fanfictions, so please, if you want to friend me because you want to have updates on them, follow that link ^^
Thanks a lot.
Previous Chapters:
Prologue
First Memory: A Winter Illusion
Second Memory: All I want for Christmas...
Third Memory: Broken Promise
Fourth Memory: Losing Faith
Fifth Memory: Confessions
First Flashback: Still on my Mind
Sixth Memory: Missing
Seventh Memory: Powder Happiness
Eighth Memory: Best Friends and Lovers
Ninth Memory: Treat me right
Tenth Memory: If I'd let you go...
Second Flashback: Lose Myself
Eleventh Memory: Over
Twelfth Memory: Be with you
Last Memory: What makes a Man
He would not have thought so, but it did hurt. Quite a lot, actually.
Whenever he saw those two together, it felt as if someone gripped his heart with a cold hand and didn’t let go anymore. Even when they were out of his sight again, it remained and made him suffer.
That was, at least, what Yamapi had murmured with dull eyes before he had fallen asleep.
Jin would have considered Yamashita Tomohisa as his best friend. He wasn’t quite sure whether the other one considered him as his best friend, too, or if it was Toma.
But, in point of fact, it didn’t matter that much to him, however. They were friends and they were close, so even if there was someone who was closer to Yamapi than he was, it didn’t matter, since it didn’t change things between them.
He could always call Yamapi and he could always call Jin. They’d be there for each other, even if it was just a meet up to eat together. They didn’t even have to talk about serious things.
That’s what friendship was about, wasn’t it, Jin thought and watched Yamapi sleeping peacefully at his couch.
He’d better bring him a blanket and let him sleep until late tomorrow morning then. Though, Jin wasn’t sure if News had something important going on tomorrow.
He went out of his living room and took his cell phone out of his back pocket, dialing Ryo’s number. He actually shouldn’t talk to him after what had just happened, but he’d better make sure, otherwise Yamapi would be angry at him for not waking him up.
“What’s up, Jin?” Ryo answered his phone.
“Are you with News tomorrow or with Kanjani?” Jin asked plainly.
“Why does it matter?” Ryo wanted to know.
“Because Yamapi is sleeping at my couch at the moment and if he’ll have to be somewhere tomorrow morning, I’ll better wake him then.”
Silence followed. “He’s sleeping?”
“He got completely drunk.” Jin explained.
Ryo didn’t even bother to ask why. He knew, anyway. “News is just going to have dance rehearsals in the evening.”
“Okay, then. Thanks.”
“Jin.”
“What is it?”, the brunette wanted to know as he looked at that small notice at his kitchen board.
“Thanks for taking care of him.”
“You know”, Jin cleared his throat. “You should be the last one to say that.”
Ryo didn’t answer anymore, but just hung up.
Jin sighed after that and tipped at the notice Kazuya had left back then, a few times, before he turned and filled a cup with hot water.
Yamapi hadn’t called today, but had showed up suddenly in front of his door. Jin was okay with that, since it was Yamapi, but felt pretty helpless. He didn’t know what to answer Yamapi, how to make him feel better.
About a month ago, Ryo and Yamapi had broken up. Jin would have never thought that would happen and just as Yamapi had said back then, he couldn’t work with Ryo anymore. It was even worse than in his and Kazuya’s case.
For the first week Yamapi had just been completely heartbroken. He was soft hearted, after all, Jin thought as he nipped at his tea. But soon after, he had found out what the real reason for the break up had been.
Even though Ryo had been together with Yamapi for such a long time by now--- they had been together even before Kazuya and Jin had gotten together--- he had fallen in love with someone else.
If he remembered it now, Jin thought, he should have known it before. Ryo had always had a soft spot for that guy; it had always been different between them. And it had gotten remarkable in the past years. There had been times when they’d been out together that Ryo had just talked about that guy.
Jin didn’t know Tadayoshi Ohkura too well, but apparently he had something about him that had made Ryo fall for him.
What was completely okay, if you didn’t consider Ryo had been in a relationship with Yamapi, while doing so.
At least he had broken up before betraying him.
But it didn’t change anything. The whole situation was just complicated and Jin wondered how he had gotten into it.
Of course he was mad at Ryo, because Yamapi had gotten drunk to fall asleep way too often lately. Because of him.
But then again, he liked Ryo, wanted him to be happy and it actually was none of his business what their love life was like.
They didn’t know about his, either, did they?
However, Yamapi was sleeping at his couch right now, too drunk to stand and get home. And Jin felt pity for him, wanted to do something for him, because the younger one had been there for him as well, whenever he had felt bad.
He sighed and got to his bedroom, taking a blanket for Yamapi. He covered him quietly and left the room, closing the door behind him.
Yamapi’s words were still echoing in his head as he got to bed himself. His situation wasn’t that different at all.
By now, Kazuya’s relationship to that girl was official and they were the most favourite couple in Japan, and the most popular. Even though she wasn’t famous at all everyone knew her name by now and no matter which fashion magazine Jin saw it would have a picture of her at the cover.
Mina-chan wears short skirts combined with long sleeve shirts this spring, Jin remembered one of the lines and snorted. Who cared for that? Who wanted to be like her, anyway?
The only reason for girls wanting to be like her and men looking at her was her relationship to Kazuya. The girl, one of the most popular male idols in Japan had chosen to be his girlfriend, had to be somewhat perfect after all.
It was so easy to get famous; you just had to pick the right boyfriend.
Jin wondered if Kazuya had ever thought about it. Minako had probably just chosen him for that one reason; because she wanted to become famous herself.
But Jin hadn’t ever just talked to her once. She sometimes came with Kazuya when they were at TV shows and waited backstage. Ueda was the one who would always talk to her and accompany her when Kazuya was busy.
Ueda was that type of guy. He could talk to anyone out of the blue, no matter if it was a man or a woman; Ueda would just say what was on his mind. And it wasn’t like Jin couldn’t handle women, not at all. He had started to date women again, as well, just for the sake of his image, but after all, he wasn’t really interested in them.
Whom he was interested in was Kazuya, still, and no matter what he did, that feeling wouldn’t stop.
But however, he got along with women, whenever he was surrounded by them he would pretend to be the perfect host, gentleman, or cold macho; whatever the situation needed.
But he couldn’t handle that one woman. He couldn’t even stand being in a room with her.
Luckily, he didn’t get into that situation too often. Since he didn’t spend his time with Kazuya, he didn’t have to handle being around those two.
Actually, looking at it completely objective, she was nice. She was pretty, calm, perfectly adorable whenever she talked in shows and even backstage.
Whatever Jin had heard her saying so far had sounded just nice. It was difficult to dislike her, but to Jin it was even more difficult to like her.
She was the reason why he couldn’t have Kazuya, after all.
Okay, actually, she wasn’t and Jin knew that. It was his own fault, his own insecurity that kept him from winning Kazuya back. The fact that Kazuya had a girlfriend by now just made it more complicated.
It didn’t matter how often he remembered those words of Kazuya, it didn’t change a thing.
He had been the one to break up, the one to leave Kazuya behind. He had also been the one who had hurt Kazuya deeply with kissing him without any affection, only for his pride’s sake and had made Kazuya lose his face.
But Kazuya had been the one to get out of Jin’s reach, to make every try to win Kazuya back unnecessary with starting a new relationship.
There was no use.
They were still the perfect couple. For almost a year those two were dating by now and everything the news had to report about them was always good. They were completely free of any scandals.
Jin put the magazine aside Masuda had left at the table in the rehearsal room as he heard someone entering the room.
They’d have performances with News for Shonen Club today, so they would practice for a last time now and then record the show.
Jin was already wearing his costume and saw Ryo coming in accompanied from Koyama and Shige. Ueda and Nakamaru were already sitting at a bench, talking about something while Koki seemed as if he had a short nap beside them.
Masuda came back, followed by Tegoshi, and made a surprised noise. “There it is! I was looking for that!”
Jin didn’t react at all, as the younger one gripped the magazine with Kazuya and Minako at the cover and took it back to their dressing room.
Next one to come in was Kazuya and from the first glance at the younger one’s face, Jin was alarmed.
Something had happened.
No one else took notice of him, since Kazuya didn’t greet anyone, just stood there, somehow lost in the room.
They had broken up. It was the first thing that came to Jin’s mind. Kazuya looked just as clueless and insecure as he had been looking when Jin had broken up with him. The younger one’s eyes were restless, he fidgeted the sleeve of his shiny coat, and he bit his lip.
Kazuya only bit his lip when he didn’t know how to go on. And when he tried to hold back a moan, but Jin was quite sure that wasn’t the case right now.
Yamapi came in and first talked to Koyama, before he came over and greeted Jin. He ignored Ryo perfectly and Jin didn’t say anything about it.
It had been a few months by now that they weren’t together anymore, but they somehow managed quite well to work together. But it was quite similar to his and Kazuya’s situation. They talked when it was necessary, but really only then.
“Yuu is coming over for the weekend.”
“So, we’re having a long night on Saturday?”, Jin just asked.
“Apparently”, Yamapi answered and sat down.
Jin didn’t really listen to what he said then, because he was distracted by watching Kazuya. No one actually took notice of him and his lost look.
Taguchi had already started practicing some dance moves and Masuda had joined him, correcting some of his steps. Tegoshi was watching them, looking as if he didn’t quite get the whole choreography. Ueda and Nakamaru were still talking, more whispering to each other, because they didn’t want the others to listen. Ryo and Shige were discussing something and Koyama tried to calm them.
And Kazuya was standing in the middle of the room; that look in his face as if his whole world had crushed.
But just in the moment that Jin had decided to just go over and take him out of here and do anything for him, Koki rushed past him to Kazuya.
Jin stopped his movement and fisted his hand.
“What’s up with Kame?” Yamapi asked.
“Who cares?”, Jin stated and turned again. “Koki is going to take care of him.”
Yamapi just gave him a knowing look before he got up. “Well, then.”
“I’ll tell you later”, Jin heard Kazuya say in a gentle voice. “Don’t worry.”
Of course, Jin thought and tried not to turn around and yell at those two. Was there anything in this world, Kazuya would not tell Koki? It just made him upset, those two were still on such good terms, even though Kazuya had a girlfriend and less time for friendship.
And why the hell was he, Jin, that jealous about it? Hadn’t it been like that for the past few years already?
He pointed all of his madness at everyone but them while they were practicing. As Junno made a pun, he snapped at him to shut up and as Koyama didn’t get that one single, damn easy step after the refrain, he thought about going over and slap him. Just because.
But the one who didn’t manage anything was Kazuya, but he couldn’t be mad at him, not at all. Even though Kazuya missed his lines, timed his dancing as horrible as a junior and apologized way too often, even before he did things wrong already, Jin couldn’t be mad at him. Kazuya looked way too lost and concerned, sorrowful.
“Okay, we’ll do the recording now”, one of the staff announced and they all went to their positions.
Jin would start together with Ryo, followed by Nakamaru and Masuda. Only then, Kazuya would enter the stage together with Yamapi and Ueda with Tegoshi, so Jin hoped the younger one would be able to pull himself together until then and lifted his microphone.
It went terribly wrong. The fans would most likely not notice, but the rest of the band did. Even the other boys from News did. Kazuya’s tempo was off and he wasn’t as jumpy and active on stage as usual.
As it was over, everyone threw him sorrowful looks, questioning in some cases, but no one actually said something.
“What was that?”, Jin directly asked, even before he realized himself what he was saying. “You were completely off.” They used to be off in rehearsals, but for recordings and lives they usually pulled themselves together and gave their all, so that it went smoothly, but Kazuya hadn’t even tried this time.
“I’m sorry”, Kazuya answered and avoided looking at Jin.
“Pull yourself together at work; at least don’t look so whiny and try to make us feel pity for you.”
“Jin…” Ueda said and gripped his arm. “It’s enough.”
“No, he thinks we’re going to overlook it, just because he’s so obviously down, but that’s not how business is working” Jin argued and gave Kazuya a cold look. “He did a terrible job and that’s nothing to overlook, no matter what happened.”
It went completely silent in the room, not even one member of the staff moved the slightest bit. He heard someone whisper “So scary” and supposed it was Koyama or Tegoshi, since they had both hidden themselves behind either Shige or Masuda.
Kazuya swallowed thickly, but then lifted his head with a determined look in his eyes. They remained like that for a few seconds, then Kazuya clicked his tongue, his look indifferent.
“I’m sorry”, he just repeated, but it didn’t sound like he really was at all, and turned then to leave the stage.
As soon as Kazuya had left, Ueda gave Jin’s arm a punch. “Idiot.”
“That hurt”, Jin complained and rubbed his shoulder.
“I hope so.” Ueda shook his head. “What was that? You were way too hard to him. We all have a bad day, once in a while.”
“He didn’t even try.”
“Who knows what happened?”, Nakamaru interfered and shrugged his shoulders.
“There’s no apology”, was everything Jin said and as he turned, he saw that all members of News had silently left already.
“You’ve scared even them”, Taguchi said.
The only one who didn’t say anything was Koki and Jin just threw him a look. Koki answered it with a shook of his head, then he left as well.
“Idiot”, Ueda repeated and followed Koki.
As Jin was alone at the stage, only surrounded by staff members who gave him fearful looks every now and then and didn’t even dare speaking, he went backstage as well.
In their changing room it remained silent for the whole time they were getting dressed and picking their things up. No one dared to say anything, especially not to Jin.
He didn’t even say goodbye as he left and hurried to get to his car.
He was mad. And he knew he wasn’t mad at Kazuya for being like that at work. Jin was mad, because he had realized he had lost Kazuya completely.
Kazuya was feeling bad, had major problems, apparently, and Jin didn’t know a thing about it.
He was not the slightest bit involved with the younger one’s life and that hurt. He had realized that there had been a time when he had known everything about Kazuya, but by now he knew even less than the other members.
He already was at his car, saw Nakamaru and Ueda coming out of the building and walking over to Nakamaru’s car. How did those two manage to be that cool and never minded about their relationship? They had something going on, after all, but they didn’t seem to have any problems.
Shige came out together with Tegoshi and they stopped at Shige’s car, apparently deciding to talk for a little longer. Yamapi, Koyama, Masuda and Taguchi were next, followed by Ryo.
Where was Kazuya? Why didn’t he come out?
Jin felt the urge to hit something.
He was most likely sitting in their changing room, crying, because his life was full of problems at the moment and Jin had made him feel even worse.
Jin opened his car and put his things in, before he closed it again and went back into the hall.
He had to apologize. Well, he hadn’t been wrong, but Kazuya needed reassurance and not scolding. He had probably gone too far to say all those things to Kazuya in front of the other boys and staff.
As he came in, he stopped. The door was slightly open and from inside the changing room he heard Kazuya sigh.
“You need to tell me, Kame, otherwise I can’t help you with this.”
It was Koki and Jin frowned. Of course, Koki hadn’t left the hall as well. How could he not have noticed?
Well, then there was no need to stay and go in. Kazuya had Koki to take care of him.
“Did Minako break up?”
Jin froze. He turned his head back and looked at the door.
“Kazuya, don’t just shake your head”, Koki said, impatient. “What is wrong then?”
Silence followed and Jin almost wanted to bump in and tell Kazuya to finally spill it, as he heard the younger one’s voice almost only whisper.
“She didn’t break up.”
“Is it even about her then?!”
No answer followed and Jin didn’t know if Kazuya had just moved his head to answer that or if he, again, took his time to answer.
“What did she do then? Cheated on you?”, Koki guessed.
Again, Kazuya didn’t answer and Jin silently clicked his tongue, because this way he wouldn’t find out anything. Kazuya had to speak.
“Did she have an accident? Or broke something important? Or is she secretly married already? Or she told something to the press, she’d better not have said?” Koki guessed every possibility and Jin couldn’t stop himself for slightly admire him for his imagination. “Or she probably said…”
“She asked me to marry her.”
The light smirk in Jin’s face died as he raised his head and simply stared at the door.
“She did… I mean, what?!” Koki’s voice was way too loud.
“She asked me to marry her.”
It remained silent and Jin couldn’t even move a finger. He waited for Kazuya to go on, to laugh it off and say: “It’s too early, obviously, so I said, I couldn’t.” But nothing came.
“Did… did you…?” Koki’s voice seemed to break, as he dared to ask.
Again, Jin felt his nerves strain as Kazuya didn’t answer anything. He made a step closer to the door, just to make sure to not miss a single word.
As they finally came out, he felt his heart sink down to his knees.
“I said, I would.”
The press didn’t know yet.
Every morning, Jin opened the newspaper he was afraid to see the news of their engagement. He still wished it was a bad joke, but apparently, it wasn’t. Kazuya had been all serious when he had told Koki.
But he hadn’t told anyone else so far. Jin really wondered what Kazuya was planning.
He picked some of the instant ramen and went over to the books then, having a look at them. It was an evening off for all of them and Jin had decided to spend it at home, watching TV and relax.
But to fully relax he had missed some food, so he had went over to the convenience store to buy some ramen and bread. And something sweet.
He’d stay over at his parent’s house, instead of his own apartment, because it just felt more like home to him.
As he walked out of the store, he raised his look to the huge apartment building at the other side of the street. It was the one Kazuya was living in and he noticed that all lights were turned off, so he assumed Kazuya wasn’t there. He was most likely over at Minako’s. At the other end of the district, Jin thought, there where his apartment was as well. Minako didn’t live that far from him. They sometimes passed each other at the street and she always greeted him.
He had never greeted her back so far.
As he had walked for only a few minutes, it started to rain and he cursed over it, hurrying up to get home.
As he stood at a cross light, it started to pour down on him like a waterfall and he almost couldn’t see anymore. The lights didn’t get green and cars were crossing the street instantly, so he couldn’t cross it and cursed even more.
As one car stopped right in front of him, he pulled his wet hair out of his face with one hand and stared at Kazuya as the younger one opened the door for him from inside.
“Get in.”
He would have been stupid not to take that offer and hurried to get into the warm dryness of the car. As he closed the door behind him he sneezed slightly and a curse followed immediately.
“What are doing? You’re going to catch a cold.” Kazuya turned to the other side of the street and gave Jin a sorrowful glance.
“No need to worry”, Jin answered, feeling uncomfortable. He had felt bad around Kazuya for so long now, but now that he knew he had lost every chance to ever get through to him again, he couldn’t quite stand it. “I was just buying some things. I’m staying at my parent’s place.”
“Ah”, Kazuya answered and turned right.
“Where are you coming from?”
Obviously uncomfortable with that, Kazuya shifted in his seat. “I was at the Jimusho.”
He had talked about his engagement with Johnny, Jin concluded.
Kazuya didn’t say anything as well, only when he parked the car at the apartment house, he frowned at the sight. “You want to walk all the way back in that weather?”
“Apparently.”
“It’s even too bad to safely drive over.” Kazuya gripped his things. “You can stay here until it’ll be better.”
Jin couldn’t help but stare at Kazuya, while the younger one opened his door and got out of the car.
As Jin didn’t follow, Kazuya opened the door for him from outside and gave him a pout. He was already soaked, just as much as Jin was. “I didn’t mean in the car, Akanishi. Come on.”
Kazuya hurried over the car park place to get to the entrance and Jin slowly left the car, not even caring about the pouring rain. He was completely wet already.
“Don’t fuck with me, Kazuya!”
The younger one stopped; he hadn’t made it entirely to the building yet. With an asking expression he turned to Jin again, finding it difficult to see the older one through the heavy curtain of rain.
“What do you mean?”
Jin remained where he was and buried his hands in his pockets. “Why are you that friendly, out of a sudden?”
“I couldn’t possibly leave you all alone in that rain, could I?”, Kazuya just said.
“So, after all, you want to give me a chance?”, Jin said without taking his answer serious.
Kazuya hold his breath. The rain was soaking through his clothes and shoes and he felt the heavy last of it dragging him down. He had felt like this for so long. “I can’t”, he whispered, thinking of what he yet had to tell Jin.
Jin knew why; he wouldn’t ever have a chance again. “You’ve wanted me to make up for my mistake, didn’t you?”
Kazuya kept silent and lowered his gaze.
“You said it was my fault and that I was the one to correct what went wrong between us”, Jin went on and got closer. “I am the one who left you; I was the one who brought us into that horrible situation. But…”
Kazuya raised his head as Jin didn’t go on.
“You are the one who is making it impossible for me, Kazuya.”
It was the truth and Kazuya knew it. He had gone completely out of Jin’s reach.
Why was everything so damn difficult? He was in love with Jin and Jin obviously still had those feelings for him. Jin wanted him back; Jin was suffering, because Kazuya had another relationship, one that made it impossible for him to change anything about them.
So, why couldn’t they just finally get over their pride and make up?
Honesty, Jin thought, was what Kazuya had required, so Jin would give that to him.
The rain got even heavier and somewhere above them Jin could hear a rolling thunder. His skin felt cold, water was dripping out of his hair and his hands were slightly shaking.
He wasn’t sure whether it was the cold or his fear.
“I’m too late, Kazuya. I can’t win you back anymore.”
Kazuya just stared at him. Then he made a few steps toward him and gripped his wrist. Jin didn’t resist, he let Kazuya tug him inside the building and to the lift.
As the door closed behind them, they kept silent. Only the sound of dripping water was heard.
They went up, further and further and Jin had the feeling the time didn’t pass by. It took so long.
“What is this going to turn out like?” Jin finally asked. “I’m going to try again and you’re going to reject me? I’m sick of it, Kazuya.”
The younger one didn’t answer.
“It doesn’t matter what I do. I’ve tried it the one way and the other.” Jin leaned against the wall and again pulled the dripping strands of hair out of his face. He saw Kazuya shivering slightly. “You didn’t want it to be just sex.”
“You don’t want that, either”, Kazuya answered and watched the doors as if the lift would move faster if he just stared at them determined enough.
“No, but when you found out it didn’t change anything. You still didn’t want it.”
The lift stopped with a gentle ringing and the doors opened quietly. Kazuya turned to Jin and gripped his wrist again, tugging him over the corridor to his apartment door.
“Kazuya, what is this about?” Jin got slightly mad now, because he already knew what this would end like. He didn’t want to be locked in a room all alone with Kazuya when the other one was going to tell him that he was engaged. He didn’t want Kazuya to see him suffer like that.
This was the most unpleasant situation for Jin.
“Listen, Jin”, Kazuya started and opened the door with his free hand. “What you don’t get is…”
“Congratulations!”
They both froze and stared, as the lights suddenly turned on and at least a million people, as it seemed to them, started to applause on them.
Kazuya gaped, his hand still holding on to Jin’s wrist. Jin stood slightly behind him and his expression was almost the same.
Koki rushed over to them and hugged Kazuya. “It’s an engagement party!”
Kazuya felt Jin completely stiffen through the contact with his hand and just wanted to turn and leave into another room, back into the elevator even, explain everything to Jin and finally sort things out between them.
But the next one to come over was Minako and she smiled at him. “Surprise, surprise!”
Kazuya managed a groggy smile. “Was that your idea?”
She shook her head. “No, Koki-kun’s. But isn’t it nice?”
Kazuya still didn’t let go of Jin’s hand, only when Minako got to her toes and placed a gentle kiss to his lips, he felt how Jin pulled away.
“You guys better come in!” Koki came back from the bathroom, two towels in his hand and handed one to each of them.
“Thanks…” Kazuya murmured and started to dry his hair. He looked around and saw that all the other band members were there, as well as friends from Minako and himself and also some from the agency.
So, with this, he couldn’t get out of this anymore. They all knew about the engagement. It was only a matter of time now until the press would know.
His look was helpless as he turned to Jin once more, but the older one completely ignored him.
“Kazuya, come over!” He turned again, as he heard it and managed a smile.
Jin shortly glanced at Kazuya as he left to the other side of the room and then continued to dry his hair off with the towel.
This was unbelievable. It was just his luck to get into a situation that was even worse than the one he had imagined to get into.
An engagement party. Did anyone really expect him to celebrate this occasion? The fact that he had lost Kazuya to a woman?
And it just got even worse, as exactly that woman took the towel out of his hands right now to help him. He didn’t want any help of her. He couldn’t even stand her being around.
“You’re completely soaked, Akanishi-san”, she said and gently rubbed his hair with the towel. Jin wanted her to stop. He didn’t want to think of her as a nice person. He wanted to hate her.
“It’s raining.”
She laughed. “I know. But why didn’t you two hurry to get in?
“I tried to make him break up with you, and the fight we had then took a little longer”, Jin answered dryly and moved out of her reach, taking the towel back.
She stared at him first, but then started to laugh. “You really have a strange sense of humor, Akanishi-san.”
She turned and left him behind. Jin just shook his head and tried not to leave immediately. If she wanted to think of it as a joke, he wouldn’t correct her. After all, it was better this way and his answer had been stupid. He would better not let anyone know about his feelings.
Minako came back with a cup of hot tea and handed it to him. “If you want to I can get you some dry clothes from Kazuya.”
“It’s fine, thanks.”
“Not even a shirt?” She looked worried. “You’re going to catch a cold.”
Kazuya had usually been the one to wear Jin’s clothes. Jin remembered how Kazuya had worn one of his shawls for the first time, because Jin had left him a love bite. He’d probably never forget Kazuya’s childish and loving smile as he had snuffled the fabric.
“I’m okay.”
“Hey, come on, let’s make a toast”, Koki said and gathered everyone in the middle of the room. He gripped Minako’s arm and tugged her and Kazuya into the middle of the circle.
They filled glasses with Champaign and as everyone held one, Koki lifted his first.
“Cheers for the couple!”
Everyone joined in and Kazuya smiled, avoiding looking at Jin.
Jin nipped his Champaign and watched them closely. The way Kazuya had put his arm around her waist and she held on to him seemed just so natural. They made a pretty couple after all.
He emptied his glass in one go and put it to one of the tables then.
To stay here was cruel; he felt the sight nagging at his heart, so he decided to leave again.
Without anyone taking notice of him, he got his jacket and went to the door.
At least this had made it easier for Kazuya. He wouldn’t have to tell Jin anymore. And Jin was sure he would not have been able to stand a farce like this one, if he hadn’t known about the engagement already.
It just hurt and it was something he couldn’t possibly stand.
“Akanishi-san, are you leaving already?”
He stopped and bit his lip. That woman was so annoying. Couldn’t she just let him leave the party silently?
He turned again and smiled at them. “I have things to do.”
“Then wait.” She rushed off into another room and came back with an umbrella. “Take this, so you won’t get that wet anymore.”
He stared at her for a few seconds, until Kazuya made a step toward them. “Minako, he’s…”
“Thank you.” Jin smiled at her and raised his hand to gently pat her hair. “Congratulations, Minako-chan”, he added and his gaze found Kazuya’s who looked at him with pleading eyes.
“I hope you’ll be happy.”
With that he turned and left.
He took the lift again and as he went out of the building, it was still raining. The sky was almost black, the thunders were rolling over him and he got completely soaked again.
The umbrella remained unused in his hands.
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Thank you very much for reading and being patient with me. I know, this was quite upsettig again v___v" It can only get better from now on. Big, holy Pinky-Promise <33