BREAK A BOTTLE, MAKE YOUR BODY WADDLE.

[gizmospur]

Comments

HAIKU IN HONOR OF CAPSLOCK TUESDAY

[sporkmetender]

I PRESENT TO YOU, IN ABJECT APOLOGY FOR MY SHAMEFUL FUCKTARDEDNESS LAST WEEK, ONE (1) HAIKU, WHICH I HAVE WRITTEN IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS. I HOPE YOUR IMPERIAL MODLINESS IS PLEASED BY MY HUMBLE OFFERING. *BOWS DOWN* *KISSES SHOES* *GETS REALLY INTO KISSING SHOES* *MOANS*

ERM. YES, WELL. ON WITH THE (QUESTIONABLE) POETRY:

ITS CAPSLOCK TUESDAY
SO SHUT THE HELL UP AND SHIFT
YOU MOTHERFUCKERS

DID YOU EVER KNOW THAT YOU'RE MY HEEEEEERRROOOO????

[gizmospur]

SEE BB!!! NOW THAT WASN'T SO BAD, WAS IT? IT WAS PRETTY AWESOME MATTER A'FACTLY AND YOU CAN JUST GO AHEAD AND ADMIT IT CAUSE I KNOW IT TO BE TRUE. AHAHAHAH I AM TOTALLY WEARING A FANTASTIC PAIR OF KNEE HIGHS TODAY TOO. THANK YOU FOR EFFECTIVELY RUINING MY BRAIN TO ANYTHING THAT ISN'T OF THE OBSCENE, PERVERSE, AND GUTTER-MINDED NATURE FOR THE REST OF THE AFTERNOON. I MEAN I'M NOT REALLY COMPLAINING I'M JUST LETTING IT BE KNOWN THAT YOU'RE TOO BLAME.

SO. FUCKING. WIN. UR AWESUM!!!

Re: DID YOU EVER KNOW THAT YOU'RE MY HEEEEEERRROOOO????

[sporkmetender]

THANK YOU, THANK YOU. *TAKES A BOW* I HOPE YOUR INTERNET IS SOON (ALREADY?) RESURRECTED, OR AT LEAST ZOMBIFIED, TO SOMETHING APPROACHING (OR MAYBE EXCEEDING) ITS FORMER USEFULNESS. ZOMBIES FTW! (LOOK OUT, HARTFORD)

Re: DID YOU EVER KNOW THAT YOU'RE MY HEEEEEERRROOOO????

[sporkmetender]

(PS) PARENTHESES FTW!!! APPARENTLY I CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT THEM! (LIKE, OMG YOU GUYZ)

[gizmospur]

(ZOMG SO HOW AWESUM ARE ZOMBIES IN PARANTHESES??? TOTALLY FOR THE WIN, OBV.)

OMG! PARENTHESE!ZOMBIES FTW!(!!!)

[sporkmetender]

THEY ONLY EAT (LIVING) FLESH! SO KEWL, RIGHT? I KILL THEM BY CUTTING OFF THEIR (HEADS) WITH MY GIGANTIC (SWORD) MADE OF STEELY MIRANDA GLARES, WITH A (HIDEOUS PLAID) WOOL SHEATH (NOW EXTRA WATER RESISTANT!). ZOMG!

[gizmospur]

WELL THAT ALL JUST SOUNDS SO (S***) THAT I THINK I'M GOING TO HAVE TO (T***) YOU AND (K***) ALL TO MYSELF FOR THE PURPOSES OF (D******) BEHAVIOR AND (W*****) DOINGS!!!

BASICALLY I'M JUST GONNA (F***) YOU WITH MY ( )

[sporkmetender]

PLZ TELL ME U R NOT TEEZING! Y YOU LEEVE ME HANGING LIEK DAT?!!!!1

I NEEDZ TO KNOW WHATZ IN THOSE PARENTHESES. *CLINGS SHAMELESSLY* YOU HAVE TO TELL ME! PLEEEEZ?!

[gizmospur]

I ALWAYS NEVER TEASE!!!

ANY FORM OF SHAMELESS RESPONSE IS PRETTY MUCH THE WORST WAY TO GET ME TO STOP CERTAIN BEHAVIOR. <3

[sporkmetender]

*LOOKS HOPEFUL AND INNOCENT. NO, REALLY. STOP SNICKERING!*

REEEEALLY? YOU TEAZE ME SUM MORE THEN? WHATEVER WILL I DO? I DUNT THINK I CAN STAND ANY MORE TEAZING! *GLANCES UP COYLY*

(PSST...IZ REVERSE SYKOLOGY WURKING YET?)

[gizmospur]

OH I GOTS THIS BITCH BACK IN GEAR. I HAZ NO EFFIN' CLUE WHAT WENT DOWN LAST NIGHT OTHER THAN IT WAS VERY NOT COOL BUT THE SITUATION HAS BEEN RECTIFIED WITH A FEW GOOD KICKS AND SOME HEAVY GLARING. I BEZ A SCARY BITCH WHEN I WANNA, RWARRWARRWAR

[sporkmetender]

SOMEHOW, I HAZ NO TROUBLE BELIEVING THIS.

Re: HAIKU IN HONOR OF CAPSLOCK TUESDAY

[sporkmetender]

BECAUSE I AM STOOPID, I WAS ALL "YOUR IMPERIAL MODLINESS" WHEN I SHOULD HAVE BEEN ALL "YOUR IMPERIAL SEXINESS" OR "YOUR IMPERIAL CAPSLOCKER EXTRAORDINAIRINESS" OR SOMETHING ELSE. I'LL BE OVER HERE STFUING. *IS ASHAMED* *SELF-FLAGELLATES*

[gizmospur]

OH AND I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THAT IN THE AWESOMENESS OF THE HAIKU CAUSE I AM SO NOT A MOD. MY CAP SAYS "RESIDENT NAZI" AND DAT'S IT. BUT I'LL TAKE IMPERIAL CAPSLOCKER EXTRAORDINARINESS TOO SO NO ASHAMEDNESS UNLESS IT'S, WELL, YOU KNOW. UNLESS IT'S THE RIGHT SORT OF SHAME AND BLUSH. THAT BE OKAY AT ALL TIMEZ.

[sporkmetender]

MAYBE YOU MISSED THE PART WHERE I WAS VOLUNTARILY SELF-FLAGELLATING? TRUST ME, IT'S THE RIGHT SORT. HEIL TO THE GIZ! *SNICKERS*

[gizmospur]

THAT LOOKS SO MUCH LIKE JIZZ. SUM ASSHOLES AROUND HERE ARE GOING TO PICK UP ON THAT AND MAKE IT STICK. I CAN FEEL IT COME. UGH.

AND I KNEW IT WOULD BE THE RIGHT SORT WITH YOU, BB. I WAS JUST BEING EXPLICIT CAUSE I LIKES IT LIKE DAT. ;)